No White After Labor Day

Winter Fashion Update (If Winter Would Just Get Here)

2006-12-19T16:27:00.000-05:00

With record warm temps hovering around 50 on and off for weeks, we are in fashion limbo here on the East Coast. "High of 57 and rainy today," we're told, so what the heck are we supposed to wear? (Hopefully no one said flip-flops.) But seriously, what about all those cute styles we had envisioned for winter? Well, if winter ever comes, here's my hit list for '07.
Turtlenecks: If it were actually cold, I'd be wearing any of the dozen turtleneck sweaters I have tucked away from Banana Republic and various thrift stores. I'm talking about fitted turtlenecks (cotton or knit), none of that oversized-neck, elongated, often-seen-with-boots-over jeans business. These a) make you look skinny when worn in a dark color, b) look great with skirts and boots, c) look great with jeans and any kind of footwear and d) look cool with some kind of long, beaded necklace or pendant on a chain. Those fitted turtleneck dresses look pretty hot, too, but please don't wear them with leggings, a wide belt AND ankle boots because the '80s are OVER. I know, I know, you can tell me the '70s are over, but that'll fall on deaf ears;)
Suede (or faux-suede) accessories: These are all over the place in all colors, jewel tones, gray, gloves, flats, boots, bags, bags, etc. Love it! Just tote them on a day that doesn't look like rain.
Quilted overcoats: Yes, it's true, everyone has one. They're being sold in every store this year, with much less emphasis on traditional wool coats. That's because they're all-weather, they're warm, AND for subway riders, they're light enough to carry on your arm when it gets hot. The nice thing is there's quite a variety out there (hooded, long, short, fur-trimmed, etc.), so you don't have to look like part of the mob, unless you live in New York and you're wearing a black one (my mistake!).
Boots: Just when you think you're tired of them, find a new jazzy pair and keep on truckin'. Rock the boots with everything and don't be shy. In particular, there are many more flat boots out in stores than there were last year, and those are way more conducive to livin' than heels.
Crocheted caps (and scarfs, gloves, etc.): They're not just for dreads anymore! Pull that mop of hair into a stretch cap or let it all hang out Blossom(gulp!)-style. Yes, and try one with a brim! A good hat should cover your ears, so stay warm!

The Ins and Outs of Fall 2006

2006-09-28T16:41:00.000-04:00

Now that it is officially fall and milder weather is moving in, it’s time to reassess the wardrobe, or just plain “assess,” as my mom would say. “David, why don’t you go ‘assess’ the contents of the fridge?” she’ll tell him, hoping he’ll throw out some three-day old tuna salad to make room for tomorrow night’s London broil. Similarly, it’s time to separate the tuna salad from the beef, so to speak. Therefore, I asked readers and friends to contribute to a list of unofficial ins and outs for fall style. Not everyone agreed, particularly on the painful subject of leggings, but many seemed to think this season would bring darker colors, military-inspired jackets, pencil skirts and red lips, perhaps calling to mind old-time USO performers or pinup girls. And while “boho” may be on its way out, minidresses and babydoll dresses (a la Twiggy or Edie, not Courtney Love) seem to be surfacing, too. Read on and embrace your femininity, soldiers!

IN
Tousled hair/loose waves
Flats, ballet and pointy-toed (yep, they’re still around)
Wedges
Pumps, round and peep-toed
Pencil skirts (in tweeds, plaids, wool, etc.)
“True waist" belts
Tights, especially worn with contrasting footwear (think mod)
Slouchy boots
Big buttons
Patent leather
The "industrial" look
Military-inspired, army green jackets and skirts
Navy coats
Big, flouncy skirts
Red lipstick
Hi-top Chucks
Green, navy blue, purple
Plaid
Gold jewelry
Suede shoes
Skinny jeans
Mini/babydoll dresses
Mary janes and T-strap shoes

OUT
Flat hair and flatirons
Extensions(!)
Sleeveless turtlenecks
Cowel-neck shirts and sweaters
Low-slung, woven belts
Pointy-toed, stiletto boots
Shoes with freakin’ bows on them
Metallic/lamé accessories (except for shoes)
Leggings (no exceptions!)
Really chunky platform shoes. (I don’t understand why Steve Madden tried to bring them back, see photo)
Cut-off denim skirts
Bubble skirts
Any kind of cropped pants (someone even ruled out pants altogether!)
Cowboy boots
Wooden/chunky plastic jewelry
Uggs (can’t believe it has to be said at this point)
That weird, teased/pulled-back bangs alien-head, ponytail thing

So You Think You Can Be AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL?

2006-09-21T16:18:00.000-04:00

I so wish Maya Rudolph was the host of AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL (see photo for the best SNL spoof ever). I don't even know where to begin, but I'll start by saying that last night, Tyra's lips were purple and her forehead looked like a sunset. I wish I had a visual aid, but in some attempt to make her gargantuan forehead appear smaller, the genius makeup artists at ANTM appeared to have spraypainted a little orange around her hairline to make it somehow blend into her skin, you know, like a SUNSET! Aside from that, I don't understand how Tyra could tell models like Anchal (an Indian girl who wore light-colored contacts) and Monique (who was told by her family that she was too dark-skinned) to be themselves when she apparently has purple eyes and lips and a forehead painted like a sunset!

But I digress. The title of this episode was "The Girl Who Marks Her Territory." I was secretly hoping that we'd be treated to some FLAVOR OF LOVE-style defecation, but it was just Monique staking her claim on a bed. Under a giant poster of Tyra. As if there weren't hundreds of creepy Tyra posters all over the place. But mainly, I was underwhelmed by the season 7 crop. I always watch and think, "Haven't you seen this show before? The judges are gonna roast you for that!" So, if you are anything like me and my friends, you probably think you could do better, right? Well, I took the liberty of downloading the eligibility requirements for the show. Follow this checklist and see if you qualify:

1) Must be 18 to 27 years of age. (First the REAL WORLD, now this?)
2) Must be at least five feet and seven inches in height. (So close.)
3) You must be a US Citizen and live in the United States. (Uh... Wasn't Nenna here on a student visa?)
4) You must not have previous experience as a model in a national campaign within the last five years. (That stint on THE JANICE DICKINSON MODELING AGENCY doesn't count, right?)
5) You must be in excellent physical and mental health. (I guess Amy Poehler's one-legged model wouldn't qualify).
6) You understand and agree that you may be required to pose ... naked. (SWEET!)

So there you have it, if you're young, tall, mentally intact and ready to get nekked, you could be America's Next ... Top ... Mo ... de ... el.

How to Dress Like a Fashion Icon

2006-05-18T10:30:00.000-04:00

The inspiration for this post is tomorrow's 16th Annual Night of a Thousand Stevies, the biggest tribute to rock and roll's queen gypsy, Stevie Nicks. Yours truly is actually going to dress up like La Nicks and has spent countless hours deliberating over fringe or no fringe, velvet or lace, 70s or 80s, platinum blonde or ash blonde, etc. Stevie had a lot of looks. And as anyone who's ever attended NOTS will attest, people LOVE to dress up like Stevie. According to designer Susan Childs of rockandrollgypsy.com, "I really do like to go to the mall (and other places) dressed up in Stevie style clothes and accessories." Susan sells beaded hair combs and other things on her site, and her stuff has even been featured in JANE magazine. Below is a timeline fashion tribute to Stevie (photos courtesy of The Nicks Fix and Rock Retrospect).

Above, ladies and gentleman, is the original Stevie Nicks. I'm guessing this was taken around 1974 or 1975, when Stevie and Lindsey Buckingham joined Fleetwood Mac. She's totally rockin' the platform sandals and bell bottoms, a look I doubt we ever saw onstage after this. And that hair is still kinda late 60s-bouffant style.
I call this one "Disco Stevie." This is back when she showed a little more skin, probably around the Rumours era when ballet fashion was very chic (and Stevies LOVES ballet). Also note that the hair's getting a little flatter and is more late 70s helmet head, like the calm before the Storm that was big 80s hair.
Beatnik Stevie is my absolute favorite. The choker and the big beret are key elements of late 70s/early 80s Stevie, along with the deep blue velvet. Also, notice how her makeup is totally natural and nails are perfect and painted an earth tone. A timeless look. Her hats, however, will get bigger and bigger over the years. I had trouble finding a Tusk-era tophat photo, but you get the idea.

This is Bella Donna Stevie, 1981. Behold and bow down to the ruched velvet boot cover. Who knew two pieces of velvet sewn together and ruched would look so fabulous over a BOOT? Stevie Nicks. Also note the bizarre headpiece, the afghan-sized shawl and how it's hard to tell where they end and the dress begins. Exactly.

Meet "Wild Heart" Stevie. I have this amazing t-shirt that says "Don't Blame Me, Blame It on my WILD HEART Tour '83." The Wild Heart record is sort of a darker Bella Donna and was released after the brief and problematic Fleetwood Mac reunion that created 1982's Mirage, which could explain her dark and mysterious look during this period, especially the cloak. Stevie will later learn that 80 square feet of velvet don't really hide you from the critics, Lindsey Buckingham's egomania or your serious cocaine addiction.

New Wave Stevie TERRIFIES me. This is a style I would never want to emulate and do not think is timeless. Can't you just picture her singing, "Do not turn A-way my friend!" Shoulderpads and teased bangs give me the heebie jeebies, as do those pointy fingernails! I believe she also wore a lot of corsets and crinoline skirts during this period, perhaps trying to a hide a little post-rehab bloat. Where was her velvet cloak then?

Which now brings us to the focus of Night of a Thousand Stevies, Red Stevie. As the NOTS invite suggests, The Other Side of the Mirror period has an Alice in Wonderland theme. The checkered floor in this pic certainly reminds me of Tom Petty's Alice-inspired video for "Don't Come Around Here No More." But the velvet dress is more "Last Dance With Mary Jane," if you ask me. Either way, red velvet Edwardian gowns marked this period, and Stevie even dyed her hair red at one point. I know I've left out a ton of things, especially the infamous batwing sleeves and the updo that looked like a big poofball on her head or various types of headgear, but there's only so much time for bloggin' Stevie's multidecade look. Enjoy the festivities, gypsies!

What's Your Vision for Spring?

2006-03-30T18:20:00.000-05:00

SPRING is upon us! It's time to sip wine spritzers on the stoop and wear lightweight jackets with spring dresses and look fabulous. (Or fabu-LASH if wearing fake eyelashes is a part of your spring look, which it should!). It's a time to be inspired by the warmer weather, to overhaul your wardrobe and trade out the wool for the cotton. But sadly, I have very little inspiration for this season fashion-wise. I lack a cohesive VISION. But I urge readers to write into nowhiteafterlaborday@gmail.com with their spring vision and I'll include your comments in a future post.

That said, I can offer these few trend predictions:

1) Flats are still in, but with a slight twist. Instead of the super thin soles of last year's ballet flats, designers are making flats with a half-inch to an inch of wedge heel. Very cute, very vintage. Check out Steve Madden's Naddine (left) and Daeley styles. They're almost an exact replica of a woven-leather Nine West pair from the 80s that I found at a thrift store for $10. You'll see wood, faux-wood and espadrille bottoms on these new styles. As for heels, definitely wood and cork wedges, and in all colors.

2) Dresses, tops and skirts with BOLD, 60s-inspired prints. For dresses, I see this working with halters, shifts or wrap-around styles (a la Diane von Furstenberg). These prints might not work on everyone, so if you're worried about over-accentuating your curves, you might want to try just one bold print in a skirt or a scarf as an accent.

3) A great transitional piece for spring is a cap-sleeved or short-sleeved sweater. I'm picturing v-neck or boatneck. Wear these with jeans and flats under a jean jacket or blazer and they're perfect for work and for going out. They also look great with a miniskirt and flats or a long denim skirt and boots. A lot of these are in thrift stores now and I think they're going to be big this season. If they're slightly oversized, they look great with a wide belt slung low over a pair of straight leg jeans. I also think we're going to continue to see wifebeaters this season and a lot of tunic-style and/or belted tops, but let's hope the babydoll look will be kept to a minimum.

4) Chunky jewelry is still around, both in neutral and bold colors. The key is to not overload. Pick one chunky bangle or beaded necklace as an accent piece to an otherwise lowkey outfit. I saw this girl on the subway the other day who looked absolutely adorable in a black fitted jacket and camisole over dark jeans paired with a white belt, white pointy-toed flats and a chunky, turquoise beaded necklace. The necklace was the only splash of color in her ensemble and she just looked so cute and cool! Wherever you are, Ms. Thing on the L-Train, I salute you!

OK, that's all I have for now! please send ideas. And pics!

From Rags to Riches: Urban Outfitters’ Spring Collection

2006-02-14T15:14:00.000-05:00

If you’ve been to Urban Outfitters lately, you may have noticed what Trend Consultant refers to as TMT, short for TOO MUCH TREND. If you’re not sure of where there is an Urban near you, just listen for the irritating sound of gold-painted metal banging against plastic (i.e., cheap jewelry) and you’ll find the Overpriced Bohemian Pirate Gear Superstore!

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not opposed to layering complimentary pieces or to wearing some of the swishy, flowing skirts and long, beaded necklaces you see around, but there comes a point when it’s just too much. Hence, the fitting term TMT. I’m referring to Urban’s displays of bohemian-style layers upon layers, regardless of whether the colors or prints are complimentary in any way, with layers of even more mismatched, obviously cheap jewelry piled on top. Throw on a vest and Voila! You’re wearing the ultimate in raglady chic. That’s another thing I’ve noticed -- most of Urban’s new styles look like a bunch of rags sewn together. (See photos).

Which brings me to another topic: Urban’s “Renewal Couture” line. From what I gather, this involves two things: (1) vintage pieces, relevant or not, with a fancy label (e.g., “70s Day Dress”) and price tag (e.g., $80.000, as one tag was clearly mislabeled, and (2) old pieces hastily stitched onto other ones – sometimes with a zipper and sometimes without – also attached to a high price tag. The green/pink number pictured on the right was priced at $198. The top has no back and I believe the pink sash (?) is sold separately.

Now, why would I drop $80 on a dress that looks something my grandmother was buried in? And even if I wanted a dress like that, I’d go to an actual THRIFT STORE (yeah, remember those?) and find one for under $20.

Urban is still good for a few things, however. My roommate and I walked out with a totally cute and affordable burnt orange carpet for our living room, and we scoured the sale racks (which are now an additional 50% off the sale price!) and came up with some really decent pieces. I paid $15 for one of those lacy, vintage-like capelets that I thought might top off a strappy sundress for the office. Although one friend said it looked like something that someone might bring you back from a foreign country and you’re like, “Uh, thanks, dude.” Or as Trend Consultant calls it, “something that looks like it came from ‘Target World Bazaar.’ ”

The sale rack’s also got some of those gaucho pants, ladies, if you wish to sport reverse cameltoe again this season;)

You Can’t Always Get What You Want (Even in New York)

2006-01-04T14:41:00.000-05:00

I give up. I can’t take it anymore. It’s the first week in January, everyone’s having a sale and I can’t find a goddamn pair of black boots to save my life. Not that they’re not out there. But it’s just that I’m looking for the perfect pair of black boots. And so is every New Yorker, at least according to the overwhelming number of responses to our Fall Fashion Survey from readers with their own vision of the right black boots.

When No White After Labor Day sent out our 10-question survey in October, readers responded that they were looking for…
“Flat black boots. They have been my holy grail. But I think I saw my pair today at Camper. Maybe. Otherwise, the search continues.” Ideal outfit for said boots? “Tights, corduroy skirt, sweater vest, button down.“ Two months later, our friend never found such boots. “Either they were too expensive and they weren’t exactly what I wanted for the money, or they just weren’t ‘it’…So you could say I shifted my focus to cowboy boots, which were easy to find on eBay.”

Another reader said she felt it was time to say good-bye to her black leather pointy-toed boots. What did she eventually pass them up for? A pair of pointy-toed brown embellished cowboy boots found on eBay.

And to quote another: “I’m searching for a pair of black boots with a slight heel – maybe one or two inches – that come up to just an inch below the knee, fitted around the calf. I think they’ll look great paired with gauchos or long skirts. Yes, a good pair of black boots…I’m still on the search for them!” Two months later… "I found a decent pair at Aldo's…. They are still maybe not my dream pair of black boots, but I may be getting closer to finding them. They were only $100, which isn't bad for a good pair of black boots. Aldo actually had a good selection when I was there. I was opting for the nicest pair at the cheapest price.”

Here’s a sad tale from another New Yorker on a mission: “I buy a pair and wear them until they disintegrate on my feet. Last spring, my boots of the last four years broke and thus did my heart. If anyone knows where I can find black leather boots with about a two-inch heel, extra narrow in the foot and calf, completely original and high-quality (preferably Italian) and for under $200, call me immediately.” Two months later… “I still haven't found the damn boots. I feel vertically challenged and a little scruffy in my internally-shredded old Daffy's special (which were far from perfect to begin with, but how can you argue with $23 boots?!)”

These are just a handful of testimonials I’ve gotten from disgruntled boot seekers. And I remain one of them. I think one of the main problems people have with finding the right boot is the heel height. I know a lot of girls who are looking for flat boots that are still cute and feminine or one- to two- inch boots that aren't "biker" boots, for example. I briefly fell in love with the boots pictured above, but when I realized they measured higher than three inches, I knew it wasn't meant to be. I also had a decent Lord & Taylor special, which were also not perfect to begin with, but they served their purpose until a tragic accident involving a broken zipper, some fishnets, an overzealous Stevie Nicks fan and an impatient boyfriend who had to literally rip one apart to get it off my leg.

So, what should we do?

Aldo has a pretty wide variety of black boots this season but their sale prices are still starting at $100. Kenneth Cole has a brand new line called Tribeca that has some affordable boot options, but they’re hard to find. I’ve seen them on Zappos and macys.com.
Then, of course, there’s eBay, which we all know has its pros (great deals if you bid smart, totally unique finds) and cons (bitchy sellers, bitchy bidders, potential quality fraud and rules). And you may find the perfect boot, but what was a size 9 in the 70s may be more like an 8.5 today or you may get caught in a bidding war with shopgirl69 or something like that.
Or as my boyfriend suggested, “Go down to Soho with your credit card.”
“Not even,” chimed in my roommate. “I’m about to start jumping people for their boots.”
“What is the perfect pair of black boots anyway?” he asks.
“I feel like I’ll know them when I see them.”
‘Nuff said.

Stay classy, ladies. To be continued…

Bingeing? Don’t Forget to Purge

2005-11-17T14:48:00.000-05:00

No, I’m not referring to an eating disorder; I’m referring to your growing wardrobe. The seasons are changing, and before you get all excited about buying some new clothes, you’ve got to binge. Our main rule at NWALD is if you haven’t worn it the last two seasons, get rid of it. If it still has a funkiness factor, you may want to save it for a clothing swap or bring it to a local vintage shop where you might get some store credit. Just remember -- most shops are only taking winter clothes now. Beacon’s Closet in Brooklyn, for example, will donate anything they don’t take to a local charity. You can also just fill up a bag and bring it to the nearest charity drop bin. Some charities will even come pick up your old clothes. For examples of what to get rid of, have a laugh at my expense and see what I recently purged:

• One 1970s style, pimpin’ pleather jacket
• One 1980s red and black polka dot sleeveless blouse (the shapeless kind moms might have worn under a suit for extra flare)
• One plain ol’ three-quarter sleeve boat neck knit top from Old Navy
• One long-sleeve black tee and one floor-length patterned skirt from Delia*s (if you still have anything from Delia*s, I’d say lose it yesterday)
• Three-inch, chunky-heeled Nine West loafers (oh, the horror!)
• Three-inch, black platform sandals (that was sad -- they were beautiful and by Charles David -- but I was following the two-season rule)

Now, I want anyone reading this to pledge one thing they promise to purge this season! For every item you purge, you’re allowed another purchase:)

America's Next Top Model, A Drinking Game

2005-11-16T18:23:00.000-05:00

Dear fashionistas,

First let me apologize for the temporary disappearance of my column! And thank you to Trend Consultant for stepping in when things started to look bleak. I promised you the results of our Fall shoe survey -- and they're coming! -- but No White After Labor Day has relocated to NYC, so we've been quite busy getting our bearings in the big city. I will say one thing: I'm still seein' a few gauchos and I'm STILL seeing flip-flops! Hello?!?! It's November already. Okay, NOW onto more important things, like ANTM, my new favorite show. Yes, you heard that right, OC, step it up or you're out of my favor! This was collectively created by various watchers who tested it last week and got pleasantly buzzed. Enjoy!

During the show…
- Drink anytime someone says "high fashion" or "fierce"
- Drink when we dyke out over Kim! (translation: drink when Kim does something totally adorable and/or funny and/or hot, or when you have a "Kim moment")
- Drink every time Jayla bitches about someone (Hell, anytime she's bitchy!)
- Drink every time Kim talks about femininity
- Drink any time Kim gets a new BFF
- Drink every time Lisa drinks or does something totally retarded, like dressing in black face (for real, see photo)
- Drink every time they go crazy over Tyra mail
- Drink any time anyone says modelingg is hard work" or something to that effect
- Drink whenever one of the models says “this is my dream”
- Drink whenever one of the models cries!

During judging…
- Anytime Nigel flirts with any of the girls (raised eyebrows counts)
- If any of the judges say: "I don't see supermodel," or "Too commercial"
- Drink when Tyra calls anyone fierce, double drink when she calls herself fierce
- Drink when Tyra goes ghetto (snaps!)
- Drink while Twiggy sits there looking prim and blinking!
- Drink every time Tyra explains the prizes
- Drink every time Tyra says "you are one step closer..."
- Drink every time either one of the Jays make a reference to how awesome they are
- Sip every time Tyra strikes a pose to show how it's done (always several in a row--if you can discern when the facial expression changes ever-so-slightly)

I SAW YOU

2005-10-26T15:36:00.000-04:00

I saw you.

Wednesday. Lunchtime. Macy’s, 34th Street, 5th Floor Shoe Department.

You: a perfect combination of pointy-meets-round toed blue-green suede pair of flats. A big flower on the side (it worked). Enzo Anglionini. Price tag: $85. You were next to an ugly pair of frumpy black flats which only made you all the more attractive. I spotted you as soon as I rounded the corner. You're the perfect color for winter. You took my breadth away. This picture doesn't do you justice.

Me: Mid-20s girl, recently arrived to this town. Brown cashmere turtleneck (thrift store purchase), green courdory skirt (H&M), brown tights, orange-brown low heel round-toed shoes (my favorite pair of the fall…or not!). I was in search of a black pair of boots, and should not be buying such an expensive pair of flats. Who wears Enzo Anglionini anymore these days anyways?

Should I buy you instead of the black boots I desperately need? I have three outfits in mind for you already (I’m thinking light gray slacks, black turtleneck). I can't be buying shoes in the middle of a move. Do I wait and hope that you go on sale soon? Look for an alternative at DSW that will pale in comparison?

Praticality over fashion. What is a shoe-obsessed girl like me to do? Help!

Rainy Day Dos and Don'ts

2005-10-13T09:23:00.000-04:00

Since there appears to be no end in sight to the rain covering the Northeast, I've compiled this emergency list of what not to wear on a day like today. Washington, DC, is fairly chilly on this rainy day and you'd have to be crazy to wear flip flops. Read on...

1) DON'T wear anything you like. A cab is likely to drive through a puddle right next to you and ruin your outfit.
2) DO wear something comfortable, like an old pair of pants you don't care about too much but still look passable for the office.
3) DON'T wear any shoes that will let water seep in and/or spray all the dirt from the road on your legs. Example: I counted at least five girls wearing flip flops this morning and walking to work. I also saw a girl teetering on pointy-toed, fabric-covered, stiletto mules, which is wrong for a number of reasons, but we won't go there right now.
4) DO wear boots and skirts. If they're leather boots, make you sure waterproof them. While a tad overly trendy, those galoshes or rain boots that everyone has are really functional and actually look cute with a pleated skirt. You can always throw a pair of heels in your bag for the office. Either way, you'll be much happier that your ankles or the bottoms of your pants aren't wet and dirty.
5) DON'T wear pants that are too long for you! I made this major mistake this morning, wearing brand new pants with sneakers for my walk to work, and now the bottoms are wet and splattered with road grease:(
6) DON'T go bare-legged. One New Yorker wrote me yesterday about having to stop in the GAP on her way to work to buy a pair of tights. And I'm guessing they weren't cheap.
7) DON'T wear suede, as Abby pointed out. No further comment necessary.
8) DON'T try to do anything with your hair. It is futile. Put some frizz-fighting serum on it and let nature take its course.

Survey Time

2005-10-04T10:29:00.000-04:00

We're doing a survey! To be included on the mailing list or to suggest ideas for future survey topics, please write to nowhiteafterlaborday@gmail.com.

More to come soon -- FA

Guest Blog*: "The New Amazon OC Clothing Line"

2005-09-30T10:14:00.000-04:00

Ladies...the latest is that Amazon is going to try and charge you a skinny lil arm and a leg to dress like Summer and Marissa with their newly launched O.C. Fashion line, which claims to "capture the young, contemporary boho-chic style that is synonymous with the The O.C."

Fashion forward or not, Marissa wouldn't shop for clothes on Amazon and neither should you. It's surprising that the stylist for the O.C. was involved in designing this clothing line. The models look like Summer and Marissa, but that's about where the similarity stops.

Gaucho pants? Halter vests? If the O.C. were about young, contemporary boho-circus performers, I might see it (there *was* the unfortunate "Marissa in a beret" incident last season that i'm still scratching my head over). I'm also pretty sure that Summer wouldn't be caught dead in a sterling silver pendant emblazoned "FLY". Mmm...sassy. If it's 1988 and you're in middle school.

Oh wait! Nope, not even then.

This stuff is so trendy, it's already out of style. If you want to get your O.C. on, check out places like Forever 21 or Wet Seal - spend $12 dollars on a sequin trimmed tube top - not $38. Spend $4 bucks on gold-toned hoops, then another $4 on some chunky wooden bracelets and you're good for the Fall. Spend your allowance on brand name shoes, handbags, outerwear (Chanel! Gesundheit.) Classy, fun, a little bit expensive, but guaranteed to last you through more seasons than the O.C. is going to last on Fox.

*This posting was written by a fellow OC fan and a very fashion-forward friend. Thanks!

OC Fashion Update: The Blushing Bride

2005-09-23T16:05:00.000-04:00

The almost ex-Mrs. Julie Cooper-Nichol-Cooper, as Sandy so aptly put it, was left at the altar on last night's OC. And while I'm so sad for her that her heart his breaking, I'm kind of relieved because a) Jimmy would have gotten whacked eventually, leaving her with his bad debt b) she's already got enough to worry about now that Cal has left her with nothing and c) she's hot! She can do better! But the real question on viewers' minds is what's going to happen to all those designer clothes? Marissa's Donna Karan? Her Chanel? The infamous Prada mary janes? And Julie's Juicy Couture sweat suits? The future is uncertain, so let’s take a moment of silence to mourn the inevitable mondo tag sale.

Okay, now that that’s out of the way, I do have one gripe about last night’s outfits. Summer was over yesterday, but Marissa and Sum are still wearing beach cover ups! While I understand this Olsen twins-inspired “maternity wear” look is the latest fad among skinny starlets trying to cover up their eating disorders, I believe it’s time to wear some more form-fitting things for the new fall season! And it’s time to eat some caramel-covered apples! Don’t you agree? I do give Sum props, though, for that amazing belted skirt that she wore while setting up that tiki hut with Cohen. Oh, and our clever Trend Consultant has pointed out that there is no longer any physical chemistry between Summer and Seth. They don’t even make out! Marissa and Ryan, on the other hand, well, they're in makeout city!

I have nothing else to say except for, I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO TAKE OFF THOSE GAUCHO PANTS!

Have a great weekend:)

Special Report: NYC Gives Sandals the Boot

2005-09-19T21:32:00.000-04:00

If anyone hoping to poke fun at and/or laud the fashion choices of Newport's finest logged into No White After Labor Day for an OC fashion update last week and didn't see one, it's only because I was in New York for the CMJ Music Marathon! Coincidentally, it was fashion week but I'd probably have a better shot at a CMJ pass than getting into a runway show, so I took to the streets and brought back these juicy pics for y'all.

While some may dispute that the OC has its finger on the pulse of fashion, Summer had it right with her back-to-school outfits featuring BOOTS! (Although I'm not sure clutches are replacing backpacks in school these days but hers does look great!) Yes, it's true -- boots are still around for the coming fall and winter -- but this time it's not just those silly Uggs* or moon boots or stiletto-heeled knee-high boots. EVERYTHING goes this season when it comes to boots. My personal recommendation is vintage anything -- riding, cowboy, Dexter, Frye -- but there's a whole slew of new boots in everything from purple croc to lime green suede, ankle to mid calf to over the knee.
While it's still too hot here in the District to trade in our sandals, the ladies on the lower East Side and the 'Burg tested out some styles at CMJ. If a girl wasn't wearing a pair of Chucks, I guarantee you she had a crazy pair of boots on with whatever she was wearing. The style I saw most? Sadly, boots and SHORTS. I'll let y'all be the judge of this look (see photo, left).

Also girls have apparently taken the American Apparel-inspired "comfort" craze one step further by -- gasp! -- forgetting to wear pants! This young lady below was the HIT of the party only because everyone could see her stuff. Of course, I saw boots with skirts of all lengths and felt cowboy boots worked best with a layered look and a longer skirt but I could see how something above the knee could work. I think the key here, just as we said with wearing white after Labor Day, is how you wear it. Trial and error! Considering we're not known for our style here in DC, I say wear whatever the hell you want this weekend and see how you feel. If it's boots with a pair of underpants, I'm sure Peaches would be proud.

*The f-ing WASHINGTON POST predicted nearly two years ago that these things would go out of style in February 2004, but those NYC chicks refused to put 'em away last winter. We'll see if the array of new styles convinces them otherwise this year.

ADDENDUM:

One lovely reader brought this photo to my attention. Model Eva Pigford (is that really how it's spelled?), apparently taking a tip from the CMJ girl with no pants on...

Cease and Desist Order: Gaucho Pants

2005-09-14T16:18:00.000-04:00

You know those thin, stretchy, almost sweatshirt-like pants that look like skirts? The sweatshops contracted by Urban Outfitters and Forever 21* are overwhelmed with orders to make what retailers this season and the last are calling “gaucho pants.” Whatever you want to call these monstrosities, in all actuality they are culottes. Yes, those ugly-ass long shorts that your kindergarten teacher probably still wears are back.

What troubles us most about this unsightly trend is that chicks feel they can wear these things ANY TIME. Every day we at No White After Labor Day see dozens of working women wearing them paired with a t-shirt and a chunky necklace. But these pants look like sweatpants – so please leave them at home! It’s true that I ate a lot of ice cream this summer and my jeans don’t fit, but I’m still not gonna pull on a pair of these babies and waddle off to work. And for heaven’s sake, if you’re on the prowl don’t wear them out! To quote one strapping young man, “They look like disco pirate pants.”

These culottes also present a real problem when it comes to underwear, lending themselves to horrifying “camel toe” and “crack” scenarios (see photo, right). I actually heard another culotte critic say they cause "reverse camel toe." If that isn’t enough to convince you against wearing them, you’re on your own.

*XXI Forever in higher income areas.

ADDENDUM:

One reader who's a bit more in touch with "what the kids are wearing," sent this photo in from the halls of a suburban high school. Meet the new "summer-to-fall transitional look" -- wool gauchos and jeweled flip flops. Hmm.

Julie Cooper Is One Sassy Biatch!

2005-09-09T09:30:00.000-04:00

In Julie Cooper-Nichol's first scene-stealing dialogue during last night’s OC Season 3 premiere, the “grieving widow” asks, “Does this look like the outfit the mother of an innocent girl would wear?” Close, Ju Ju. So close. Your fire-engine red locks may be so toned down this season that they’re nearly auburn, but you can’t take the sass out of MS. Cooper-Nichol. To quote her beloved Bob Seger, “You’re still the same.” While no one outside Newport would ever be able to pull off the Technicolor animal prints and fuschia strappy stilettos, No White After Labor Day was happy to see that a darn thing hasn’t changed.

2005-09-09T09:09:00.000-04:00

In other OC-related news, the girls are growing out their bangs! What does this all mean? Do you think Marissa finally realized that straightening your bangs with a flat iron is not the way to go? Personally, I think Summer never felt quite comfortable with hers, but does this mean that bangs are out? We need your input! Meanwhile, check out the various methods the girls have adopted to aid in the awkward growing-out phase — braiding and headbands!

As for the girls’ outfits, we did not see a single torso-elongating wife beater, cropped cardigan or “super flirty” Mexican skirt. Ballet flats may or may not have been present. Perhaps we’ll have more to say when school starts. For now, the girls sported bikinis more often than they did clothes. Stay tuned for a special report from Trend Consultant on Amazon’s “exclusive” new collection of OC wear.

No White After Labor Day?

2005-09-07T14:02:00.000-04:00

Hello and welcome to "No White After Labor Day," a blog devoted solely to fashion advice. I am your Friendly Adviser here to do what I can to save the female (and sometimes male) population from humiliation. I currently live and work in Washington, DC, which could perhaps be the worst fashion offender since Downtown Julie Brown, who by the way I still can't believe is not the same person as Scary Spice. I therefore feel more qualified than the average person to give fashion advice. Feel free to disagree at ANY time. I welcome it!

So let's get the first argument out of the way: Is it okay to wear white after Labor Day? My answer is actually yes, but with a few caveats:
1) Please don't wear a white pantsuit (see photo, above). I believe whoever came up with the original Labor Day rule had something like this in mind. The only people who are allowed to do this year-round are Diddy and the Pope.
2) Use white as a funky accent and not the main attraction of your ensemble. For example, pair a black mini-skirt with black fishnets and white pumps. H-O-T!
3) Adapt to what is called "winter white." We see enough white in the winter when a) it snows and b) we catch a glimpse of our bare ass in the bathroom mirror. Strive to wear things that are more of a cream color to offset such blinding visions.

That said, I'll let you mull this over for tomorrow's ensemble and I'll turn it over to my partner in crime. Stay tuned for the latest on Gaucho Pants, shoes you should kick to the curb and much much more from the No White After Labor Day team!

2005-09-07T13:53:00.000-04:00

Aah. Washington, DC. The land of the barely fashionable. Just walk around the downtown Farragut North area and you'll see all sorts of mismatched outfits that will leave you to wonder, what what she thinking when she walked out of the house? I see women wearing clothes that were barely "hip" back in 1999 as if it were the latest fashion. And while I may be a lover of mixing vintage clothing with some modern pieces as much as the next girl. Honey, what was trendy in 1999 ain't cool again.
This is where my partner and I come in. We are here to help those who don't know how to help themselves. From those women who need to learn that fake Coach bags aren't that cool to simply adding accessories to a mediocre outfit and improving it tenfold, it's all about looking and ultimately feeling good.
So to all you DC people and elsewhere in need of a new look, it's not that you can't wear white after Labor Day. It's more about learning HOW to wear white after Labor Day.