Sexclinique.net

Sex Q& A: Ingin Nonton Film Erotis berdua Istri

2007-11-30T02:19:00.000+07:00

Gnw, Indonesia

Saya seorang pria dan telah menikah. Saya mempunyai kebiasaaan menonton Film Erotis, karena saya percaya dengan menontonnya dapat menstimulasi gairah saya dalam bercinta. Kadang-kadang saya ingin mengajak istri saya untuk menontonnya dan siapa tahu kami dapat bercinta dengan lebih dahsyat. Tapi sayang, istri saya ogah-ogahan. Sebenarnya baik atau tidak sih dok, menonton film erotis sebelum bercinta? Dan bagaimana saya bisa membujuknya agar mau?

Dear Gnw,

Gnw.. yang hobi nonton BF tapi sayang istrinya nggak mau (atau mungkin malu-malu kucing?). Sering hal ini merupakan hal yang lumrah di Indonesia. Ini adalah produk dari seks edukasi yang salah. Biasanya orangtua itu takut terjadi 'kecelakaan' pada wanita, maka mereka berusaha menakut-nakuti wanita mengenai masalah-masalah seksual diharapkan dengan menakut-nakuti maka wanita akan menjauhi hubungan seks terutama sebelum menikah. Tapi hal yang sangat negatif dari cara ini adalah wanita jadi tidak bisa menikmati seksual seumur hidupnya karena terlalu didepresi, bila dia didepresi selama 10-15 tahun tentu tidak bisa merubahnya dalam 1-2 hari sehingga anda jangan takut ini sudah merupakan suatu kebiasaan bahwa wanita tidak senang nonton film erotis. Mereka bahkan juga tidak senang melakukan hal-hal yang berlebihan dalam hubungan seks. Karena mereka menganggap hal itu sebagai dosa, kotor, tabu dan membayangkan bahwa gerakan-gerakan seperti itu tidak layak buat wanita baik-baik dan hanya dilakukan oleh perempuan-perempuan 'nakal'. Jadi itu sudah suatu pola kepribadian. Nah sekarang bagaimana cara membujuknya? Anda musti merubahnya dengan perlahan-lahan dan sabar. Kalau anda cukup gigih maka saya kira lama-kelamaan pendirian istri anda akan dapat berubah.

Sex Q & A: Considering Having Sex

2007-08-21T03:10:00.000+07:00

Dear Doctor,

i have liked this guy for a REALLY long time we have been together a couple times but we have not had sex. he would be my first if i did decide to have sex w/him. i have been considering it a lot lately. i am worried about the after days of having losing my vierginity. will i bleed? will i still be sore? will i walk funny? will my mom be able to tell just by looking at me? please respond as soon as possible before i make a mistake! thank you!

Dear Lind in USA,

To decide whether will you bleed or not in a sexual intercourse, it depends whether you had lost it or not before the intercourse because sometimes virginity can be lost by many things beside sexual relationship, such as excessive stretching of the thighs when you are doing sports.

Sometimes, when it bleeds, then it would be a little bit sore. Your mom or other people won’t be able to tell whether you are still a virgin or not just by looking at you.

Before you decide to have sex, you have to think to yourself about the risks of having sex before marriage. There are many risks you must consider, such as Pregnancy (are you ready to be a mother?), and sexual transmitted disease (Gonorrheae, Syphillis, Herpes, HIV/AIDS, etc).

I must say that the safest way of having sexual relationship, is by getting married before. Thank you

Sex Q & A: Could i get pregnant?

2007-07-12T00:04:00.000+07:00

Dear Doctor,

I need to know: Could i get pregnant by transferation of sperm that went through my mouth, then we did french-kissing, and then his mouth goes to my vagina? thanks.

Dear Linda, in US

No, it is impossible to get pregnant, because in mouth there is an enzym, a protheolytic enzym which can kill protein such as sperms. This enzym is contained in our saliva. So, it is impossible or a little chance to get pregnant that way.

Sex Q & A: My lover can't ejaculate

2007-07-10T22:29:00.000+07:00

Dear Doctor,

my 30 yr old lover has no problem staying hard for hours, even after ejaculation, his problem is that he wants to come over and over again, and we can't seem to get him to do this more than 3 times in a session--could be hours..he really wants to come often, and is very open to all aspects of sexual pleasure,,viagra and other male stimulants seem to just make him numb and unable to come at all,, is there anyway that would enable him to ejaculate more often,,as i said, staying hard and achieving erections are not a problem

Dear Sue,

As long as I know, the sexual performance of your 30 year old lover has already been in a very good condition or I can say he has very superb condition. If he can get up 3 times in a session and can stay for hours, then that’s already a very good / extraordinary performance for your lover.
I ‘m afraid we don’t have any drugs/methods to make people ejaculate very often. The ability to get erection and ejaculate is something which is born together with you, so it is an individual potency and cannot be changed by drugs or any methods. So, don’t worry just be happy with it, just remember that you had everything that has already been extraordinary in comparison to other people.
Maybe you can remind your lover and let him read Multiorgasmic Man book. In that book, Mantak Chia has stated that in Chinese custom, ejaculation is a waste of energy. So, Chinese (Taoist) tends to get many orgasm without ejaculation. According to him, that’s the healthiest thing. You can get many orgasm without having ejaculation.

Sex Q & A: HELP! I couldn't penetrate

2007-06-30T03:45:00.000+07:00

Sugi, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor,

I have a problem with my wife. I have just been married about one month ago, but I couldn’t have been able to penetrate. I’ve tried any possible ways. For addition, my wife is 27 years old and her vagina is very tight. Sometimes my penis feels hurt when I try to penetrate. So please doc, explain me how to penetrate her.

Dear Sugi in Indonesia,

This is called Vaginismus and this happened when the women feels fear and she squeeze with her thigh so the vagina become so tight. Try to penetrate gradually. In the first time do not penetrate with your penis, just try by your little finger first. It will be better with lubrication liquid and do it slowly.

If your little finger succesfully penetrated, try with the bigger one. If your wife start to feel pleasure with your biggest finger, now you can try by inserting the penis slowly.

Sex Q & A: KB kalender, KB terbaik?

2007-06-28T01:25:00.000+07:00

Agus, Indonesia:

Dokter,

Salam,

Saya seorang pria berumur 25 tahun. Saya pengantin baru, dan masih bereksperimen tentang cara-cara bersenggama yang baik,.. Nah

kami bersepakat untuk menunda kehadiran anak, sehingga kami kemungkinan besar akan ber KB, namun selama ini kami memiliki anggapan bahwa KB yang terbaik adalah melalui penanggalan.

Kemarin pada hari kedelapan setelah istri saya haid kami keterusan dan saya memuntahkan cairan semen saya di dalam,

Apakah hal ini akan mengakibatkan kehamilan, dan kalau iya apakah masih bisa dicegah, sebab kalau sang janin telah terbentuk kami tidak akan melakukan aborsi...

Demikian pertanyaan saya dok, terima kasih banyak sebelumnya atas tanggapannya...

Mas Agus yang jago komputer di Indonesia

Tidak betul bahwa KB penanggalan adalah metode KB yang terbaik. Jaman Baheula,.. kali! Teknologi sudah sedemikian canggih, orang sudah pakai internet segala, anda masih pake KB jaman baheula, ketinggalan jaman namanya.

Kalau KB penanggalan itu baik atau memuaskan maka kita tidak akan mencari metode-metode baru, logis kan? Kalau para ahli medis masih mencari metode KB yang baru terus, maka itu berarti metode KB yang ada selama ini belum cukup memuaskan, apalagi KB dari jaman ratusan tahun yang lalu.

Anda mengatakan sudah kebablasan memuntahkan sperma di dalam vagina istri. Ya.. ini masalahnya, ini tentu bisa menimbulkan kehamilan. Kalau sudah terjadi pembuahan di dalam, maka ini sudah tidak bisa dicegah. Kurang lebih 13 hari sebelum haid yang akan datang (1-3 hari setelah senggama) akan terjadi pembuahan dan sudah terbentuk janin (modiga). Memang belum bisa terlihat tapi janin itu sudah ada.

Tips: Guide to Contraception Methods

2007-06-27T03:37:00.000+07:00

There are two important reasons for choosing a contraception method. Usually patient choose a contraception which have less side-effect. Side-effects of using contraception are such as becoming fat, thin, got a headache and etc. These side-effects can happen to everyone but with less possibility which is about 2 - 3 %. There are some contraception methods such as sterilization, contraception pills, injection, IUD, contraception barrier method, another method and calendar method.

The Rank of Failure Ratio of Contraception Methods sorted from less failure ratio to high failure ratio as below:

1. Sterilization.

This method have the least side-effect. The failure ratio of sterilization is about 2 - 6/100. 000 patient in a year.
Sterilization on women is usually called MOW ( medis operatif wanita ) or tubectomy and on men is called MOP (medis operatif pria ) or vasectomy.
Sterilization on men is done by making a blockage on the vasdeferens. By doing this, sperm route to the ovum is blocked, so the sperm won't be able to reach the ovum. Women and men can use this method. The blockage process is done outside the testicles so sterilization won't have a dangerous side-effect and safer.

2. Contraception pills.

Contraception Pills contain normal hormone in the women's body and this hormon make the condition of women's body similar to the condition of pregnancy. The failure ratio of contraception pills is about 1%.
Pills method is intended for a neat person and someone who have a good memory.
Patient must eat the pill regularly in order to make it work. There are many kind of pills such as pills which produced by BKBN, it's very cheap, pills with blue and gold square (lingkaran biru and emas) which is subsidized by the state, or pills with less doses and it's expensive. Don't use pills if the woman had abnormal bleeding. Someone who have a varices is also not permitted to use these pill because contraception pills can disturb the cycle of blood.

3. Injection.

There are many period of injection such as 1 month, 2 month or 3 month.
Injection also contains sexual hormone of a woman, so it will disturb the cycle of menstruation but don't worry about that. Usually a woman thinks that menstruation blood is a dirty blood so she thinks that irregular menstruation can have bad effects or psychomatic disease such as headache.

4. IUD

IUD is similar to injection but have longer period of time.
The period is about 1 year until 3 years. IUD is done by inserting a cylastic tube into the uterus. A cylastic tube must be taken out if the period is over. The side-effects of IUD is similar to the side-effects of injection.

5. Contraception barrier method (condoms or diaphragms)

The failure ratio of contraception barrier method is about 3 - 30 %.
Condoms can be used for variations in sexual performance and can prevent sexual transmitted diseases. There are many kinds of condom. There is a condom which have texture for sexual variations or there is a condom which can be used as the extension of a penis.
Diaphragm is a round elastic rubber which is inserted inside the vagina to prevent sperm from getting in the uterus.

6. Another method

Another method is using spermicyde to kill sperm so it can't fertilize the ovum. A spermicyde is chemical substance which can kill sperm. Women can use a vagina tablet, which have function similar to the function of a spermicyde.

7. Calendar method

This method have the biggest failure ratio. The manner of this method is by paying attention to the cycle of menstruation and the end of fertile period. Sometimes this method is used together with condom's method. Condom is used during the fertile period and calendar method is used during the infertile period. Calender method is intended for a woman who have a regular menstruation.

Tips: Determine your Baby's sex

2007-06-27T03:27:00.000+07:00

Would you like to have a Baby Boy? Or you prefer a Baby Girl instead?

These following tips could be used to let you determine your baby's sex that suits your preference. These tips are derived from a popular science, there's no special research conducted about this yet. The possibility of success is about 40 - 60%. We also need to remember that no matter how hard we try, God decides.

For your information, Normally, in one ejaculation sperms are ejaculated in 2-5 cc liquid form. Every cc consists of 60-200 million spermatozoids. So the amount of spermatozoids ejaculated in one ejaculation is about (2-5) x (60-200 million) = 120 million - 1 billion spermatozoids.

But we only need one spermatozoid to fertilize the ovum.

Basic Principles :

We know that in sperms there is androsperm (Y gene) and gynosperm (X Gene). If androsperm fertilize the ovum, then you will get a male baby. But if the gynosperm fertilize the ovum, you will get a female baby instead. .

Husband's Gene	Wife's Gene	Baby's Sex
X	X	XX (female)
Y	X	XY (male)

Andosperm lives better in basal environment. Gynosperm lives better in acid environment.

Androsperm moves faster than gynosperm to ovum. But the weakness is that its energy usually drop fast too and can't live longer in vagina.

Gynosperm usually moves slower than androsperm but they have more energy and can live longer in vagina.

In ovulation, sperm lives for 7 days inside the woman's body, but it can fertilize in 3 days in advance. So the best way to get pregnant is to have sex every 3 days periodm because there will always be sperm that lives in the mother's body.

Spermatozoids march inside the vasdeferens waiting to be launched. Spermatozoids need 2-3 days to mature inside the vas deferens. Sexual intercourse that performed too often can cause unmature spermatozoid be ejaculated otherwise, if performed more than 4 days interval, spermatozoids would get obsolete and not good for fertilization.

How to get a Baby Boy :

Sexual Intercourse is best performed in the time of ovulation or in the day close to ovulation time.

Before having sex, it's better for you to make preparation, woman's vagina should be washed by a solution consists of 2 tablespoon of baking soda dissolved into 1 litre of water.

Besides that, eating basal-contained food can help also. Basal-contained food such as fish, seafood, half-ready meat can make blood turns to basal environment, but beware of toxoplasmosis.

The husband should ejaculate his sperm deep inside the vagina, as close as it can be to uterus opening.

How to get a Baby Girl :

Sexual intercourse is best performed during 2-3 days before ovulation time.

Before having sex, it's better for you to make preparation, woman's vagina should be washed by a solution consists of 2 tablespoon of vinegar dissolved into 1 litre of water.

The husband should ejaculate his sperm close to vagina opening so that sperm couldn't get inside the uterus quickly. This should give gynosperm a chance to fertilize the ovum.

Besides that, eating acid-contained food such as sore fruits, yoghurt, and fresh vegetables

Please keep in mind, we can only make an effort, the end result depends on God's will.

Sex Q & A: Virginity

2007-06-21T23:30:00.000+07:00

This one is also for those Indonesian-spoken.

Upi, Indonesia

Assalamu'alaikum, Dok.
Dengan hormat,
Saya ingin menanyakan, apakah seseorang yang pernah berhubungan sama pacarnya tapi tidak sampai dimasukin penisnya, hanya diluar saja.Apakah saya dibilang perawan?Trus, apakah saya perlu periksa sama dokter tentang keperawanan tersebut? Saya sekarang merasa sangat bersalah. Dok, saya mau bertaubat tapi apakah diterima taubat saya? Trus, apakah saya bisa dapat suami yang tidak seperti saya sebelumnya? Saya sangat khawatir akan hal itu. Karena pacar saya sekarang tidak mau diajak untuk nikah. Alasannya masih mau berkarir. Saya sekarang kuliah. Dok, apakah jika ada calon suami saya sekarang, perlukah saya mengatakan bahwa saya pernah berhubungan intim dengan pacar saya dulu? Saya benar-benar menyesal akan tindakan saya dahulu.
Wassalam

Adik Upi,

Mengenai keperawanan, itu tergantung seberapa jauh masuknya. Kalau benar-benar di luar saja sih tidak akan merusak keperawanan, tetapi kalau sudah masuk satu senti, dua senti mungkin bisa saja agak mengganggu selaput perawan anda.

Anda tidak perlu memeriksa selaput dara anda ke dokter.

Jika anda ingin bertobat cepatlah bertobat, kalau memang niat anda sungguh-sungguh pasti Allah akan menerimanya karena Allah itu Maha Pengampun.

Mengenai pacar anda yang tidak mau diajak nikah, ya.. silakan saja anda tentukan. Ada dua pilihan macam laki-laki. Yang satu adalah yang ingin seks, sedangkan yang satu adalah yang ingin menikah. Orang-orang yang ingin menikah, tidak akan mengganggu anda secara seksual, karena ia akan betul-betul menginginkan malam pertama yang indah.

Kalau memang mereka sudah melakukan seks secara kontinyu, maka kemungkinan besar tidak akan mau menikah. Ada laki-laki yang hasrat seksualnya besar, tapi tidak memiliki uang untuk pergi ke penjaja seks, maka mereka akan mencari seks yang gratisan. Kalau anda menolak, ya mereka akan cari orang lain yang mau diajak seks bebas. Itulah masalahnya terutama pada mahasiswa.

Anda tidak perlu takut, kalaupun anda ingin memeriksakan diri ke dokter, nanti saja jika akan menikah sebab kalau dilakukan sekarang, nanti justru akan menimbulkan stress pada diri anda. Jangan pikirkan hal-hal yang sudah lewat, pikirkanlah masa depan. Masa lalu boleh dipakai sebagai bahan pelajaran dari pengalaman, dan lakukan hal yang lebih baik di masa depan.

Sex Q & A: Saya sempat membayangkan jadi lesbian

2007-06-19T16:39:00.000+07:00

Sorry for those english-speakers now we give a chance for 'Bahasa Indonesia' questions to be posted:

Kintan, Indonesia:

Dokter,

Dok, saya wanita berumur 25 tahun. Di lingkungan sekitar saya, ada perempuan yang berpacaran dengan sesama jenisnya (lesbian). Kadang dalam hati saya bertanya-tanya, apa sih enaknya? Bahkan kadang-kadang sempat juga membayangkannya. Apakah saya normal dok? Saya takut keterusan dengan pikiran seperti itu dan sampai terjerumus.

Adik Kintan yang manis, di Indonesia,

Di lingkungan anda ada seorang wanita yang berpacaran dengan sesama atau lesbian. Dalam hati anda bertanya-tanya, apa sih enaknya? Kadang-kadang anda sampai membayangkannya. Anda takut keterusan dan terjerumus (mungkin sepertinya 'kecebur' sumur?).

Saya lihat di sini bahwa anda juga memiliki kecenderungan ke arah homoseksual. Homoseksual adalah gairah seksual terhadap yang sejenis. Tapi anda jangan terlalu takut.

Kalau kita menggunakan teori dr. Alfred Kenzie maka dia mengatakan bahwa memang diciptakan 96% manusia itu sebagai biseksual dalam gradasi-gradasi yang dibagi dalam 5 kelas. 2% manusia yang tergolong dalam pure homoseksual, dan 2% lagi tergolong dalam pure heteroseksual. Kedua golongan ini tidak dapat bergaul dalam masyarakat. Bahkan mereka justru yang dianggap sebagai orang sakit. Semua manusia normal berada dalam grup biseksual.

Salah satu contoh yang ringan, Seorang wanita dapat menikmati kecantikan wanita lain walaupun tidak terangsang. Misalnya anda senang dengan bintang film tertentu seperti Madonna, atau anda senang melihat penampilan dari Marissa Haque, ini menunjukkan bahwa di dalam diri anda ada sebagian dari homoseksual tadi.

Jadi itulah klasifikasi yang dibuat oleh dr. Alfred Kenzie. Apa yang anda lakukan yaitu hanya membayangkan saja masihlah normal. Anda tidak perlu takut selama anda tidak melakukan hubungan praktis. Saya kira anda tidak akan terpengaruh kalau hanya membayangkan saja.

Sex Q & A: I frequently had this sado-masochist fantasy.

2007-06-19T16:34:00.000+07:00

Rbt, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor,

I'm a 22 year-old man and not married. In recent weeks, I frequently had this sado-masochist fantasy. I didn't know where it came from, but I always try to fight this fantasy. Am I normal, doctor? I'm so afraid that this fantasy would disturb my sexual life in my marriage later.

Dear Rbt in Indonesia,

So you frequently had sado-masochist fantasy, and you had tried to fight it. As long as it stays only as a fantasy, you would still be normal. But if this sado-masochist fantasy has become an action and caused pain or death, this is very serious. Of course it would be classified as abnormal.

Usually, a sado-masochist begins from depressed personality. Maybe he has parents who are very strict and make him depressed. he could become a sado-masochist (enjoy receiving pains/hurts or enjoy hurting someone) then because he frequently received pains from his parents (beated, kicked etc). On the other hand, he might rebel against them and become very sadistic such as killing his parents. So it has relationship with one's childhood.

So, if you have lover who is sado-masochist too in your future marriage, it'll be a great match for sexual relationship. Sado-masochistic fantasy is still normal and won't become a serious problem for you. If someone who is in serious grade of sado-masochist and has wife who isn't, then she might refuse to do sado-masochistic things. Sado-masochist can sometimes disturb sexual relationship because non sado-masochist will refuse to hurt his/her partner or to be hurt by his/her partner in sexual performance.

Sex Q & A: I often cannot reach satisfaction, Is there something wrong with me?

2007-06-08T22:50:00.000+07:00

Uci, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor,

In our sexual life, I can get orgasm easily sometimes, but I often cannot reach it. Is there something wrong with me, doc? Does each woman have different easiness in orgasm? I have a friend who told me that she can reach it very easy. How could it be doctor?

Dear Uci in Indonesia,

You're right that women have different experience toward orgasm. Some of them can reach orgasm easily, but some of them cannot. This can be caused by many things. One of them is that each woman has different stimulating spots on her body. The most stimulating spot on women is around clitoris. You know clitoris is located at the top of vagina. It is located on the upper conjunction of labium minora. Clitoris is quite the same as penis in man. It is the area which consists of many blood-vessels that usually can bring abundant sexual stimulation. This would make women easy to reach orgasm. But there are many other spots beside clitoris.

There are areas around vagina that can bring sexual stimulation. First, there is U-Spot (Urinary Spot), located about 1 cm down from the urethra. Try to stimulate this area by pressing or rubbing it. Sometimes you can do it using your husband's penis or by finger.

Then, on the base of vagina there is the S-Point (Stretch Point). Right under the Perinium, try to stretch it left or right by your fingers. This spot can bring much stimulation to most women. The last spot is called as G-Spot. G-Spot is located on the upper wall inside the vagina. If you touch the upper wall of vagina by finger after you passed the urethra, go inside about 1-2 cm. You'll found a bone that is called 'pubic bone'. G-Spot is located on the back of pubic bone. Of course you can reach it by fingers only because it's very hard to reach it by penis, except if your husband have tilted-up penis. G-Spot can also be reached if the penis is aimed to the upper wall of the vagina.

You said that you can get orgasm sometimes. I suggest you to pay attention on what position, what kind of activity in your sexual intercourse that can make you reach orgasm. Also, Pay attention on the stimulating spot and how to stimulate it. If your friends said that she can reach orgasm easily, maybe that's because they've known each other very well. Her husband can make her reach orgasm easily because he really knows how to stimulate his wife. I hope you understand it.

So i suggest you to make a map of your body. All sides, the front and the back side of your body. Try to stimulate a spot and give it a point. Ranges from +1 to +3. 1 point means that this spot has sexual stimulation, 2 has more sexual stimulation, and 3 has the most sexual stimulation. So, when you are having sex with your husband, you can stimulate it effectively to help you reach orgasm easily.

Sex Q & A: Is it safe to have sex while i'm still having menstruation?

2007-06-07T23:22:00.001+07:00

Ll, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor,

I'm a 25 year-old woman and have been married for a year. Once, my husband had asked me to have sex with him when i was having my menstruation. At that time, i refused to do so. But i am still curious and would like to ask you whether it is safe to have sex when i am still having my menstruation?

Dearest Ll in Indonesia

Well, do you know that every religion in this world forbid anyone to have sex when they are having their menstruation. Especially in Islam, it is forbidden and it is a sin to do so. It is also forbidden from medical point of view. Let's hear it from this view.

You know that women's sexual organ has openings, from the bottom (vagina) and leads towards the cervix of the uterus, goes to the uterine cavity to be fallopian tube and ends in the periloneum cavity. We know that there are many important and sensitive organs in the abdomen, such as pancreas, liver, etc. If germs/viruses comes from inside the vagina and goes inside the abdomen. This can be dangerous. In normal conditions, there's slimy juice on the opening of the cervix that contain abundant of leucosits. This leucosits will be ready to eat any germs or viruses that try to go through to the uterus. This juice is important to the women's body because we know that men seldom wash his penis before having sex. This juice can also stop dirt or beach sand that brought inside the vagina for example when a couple is having sex on the beach sand. Vagina also produce protection by what we called Doderline germs, this substance can prevent infection in the vagina. Even when the germs can pass the vagina they will be stopped by cervical gel, so they can't infect the uterus.

When a woman is having her menstruation, this slimy juice is removed from the cervical opening to let the menstrual blood pass through to the vagina. So, during menstruation, a woman's sexual organ is exposed to any possibilities of infection. That's the first thing, second thing is that a woman has many injured by the uterine cavity. If a woman is having sex during her menstruation, any germs can get inside the vagina, quickly goes through the uterus and her abdomen. In addition, they can also get inside the veins and directly goes to the vital organs in her body. This is very dangerous to women. This can also cause immediate death if there's air bubble that pushed inside the veins by penis and go through to the vital organs such as the brain on bubble will cause alergy, seen by seijures that quickly followed by multycle organ failure and sudden death occius. We knoe that there were many accident like this happened before.

So, as you can see medics and religion has the same opinion about this problem. I hope you can understand and pay careful attention on it.

Sex Q & A: What is Menopause?

2007-06-07T23:17:00.000+07:00

Nn, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor,

I'm a teenage girl and has very limited knowledge about sex. I would like to ask you about what menopause is and what its influence is for women?

Dear Innocent Nn in Indonesia,

So, you're a girl who wanted to know about menopause. Menopause is the end of reproduction phase at women, marked by the halt of menstruation totally because ovarium has stop producing fertile ovums. This would also stop the production of basic reproduction hormonals such as estrogen and progestron which is marked by hormonal fluctuation.

Fluctuation, more or less is like a battery which is going to lose its energy. Sometimes it has big power, sometimes it loses its power completely irregularly. Usually a woman at this state is getting an irregular menstruation, the menstrual interval is changed into irregular period, sometimes once a month, twice a month, three times a month or even twice a week. The amount of blood excreted will also be various. Sometimes she excrete a lot of blood, sometimes just a little. This could be very annoying to women.

Another thing that we have to know about menopause is that there is a change is psychological state on women which is caused by the alteration of these hormons. We can see the example of psychological state alteration of a woman in her puberty. In puberty, woman's sexual hormons are developing and the alteration of her psychological state is happened when menstruation stop. Sometimeswe can also see this in a pregnant woman. The process is quite the same. The psychological problem in menopause are inconfidence, easily get upset, motoric disturbances, felt hot in the face and flushing. And then, she felt uncomfortable and there are also other disturbances such as skin disturbance, dry-skin, vagina secretion becomes dry which can cause pain when having sexual relationship. The urethra skin can also be thinning which can cause an urethral infection on women. Pains in muscle, bone and finally what we're afraid of is the osteoporosis (the reducing of calcium in bones).

These symptoms will not always affect women and they would affect women variously. About 30% of women that have reach menopause, reported get these symptoms. 70% of them didn't get any of these symptoms and didn't have any problem in their menopause. I hope you will be included in this 70%. Amien.

Sex Q & A: My husband penis is tilted down, is it normal?

2007-05-31T21:17:00.000+07:00

Ss, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor,

I'm a 35 year-old married woman. So far, we had good sexual relationship. But, as I take a good look, why is that he doesn't have full erection? It's completely different from what I see in the movie that usually penis is tilted up but my husband's is tilted down. Is there any medication to cure him?

Dearest Ss in Indonesia

You are already married and have a good sexual relationship. Your question is that why can't your husband's penis get full erection, different from what you see in the movies that men always have full, and tilted up erection.

If your husband has tilted down but hard erection, it just a matter of position. Each man has different erection angle. Some goes up, some goes down, even a little bit right or left. Sometime, a few men used to bend their penis down, so this will affect his penis too.

The main problem is at the hardness of the erection. If he has weak erection then I'm sure there's a problem. But we have to see whether it is a psychological or anatomical problem. If it can't get hard enough then you should pay attention whether there's difference between the morning erection or the pre-intercourse erection. If in the morning erection is hard and weak during sexual intercourse, then there must be a psychological problem, you should consult to psychologist. But if both are weak then I suggest you should visit a urologist.

Sex Q & A: By doing petting, can it result to Pregnancy?

2007-05-31T21:13:00.000+07:00

Alx, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor, I am a 20 year-old boy. I have a girlfriend who is also 20 years old. We often release our passions by kissing and caressing each other. One day, we did something that looks like having a sex. We did it on bed and rub each others groin, but we're not naked, we still have our clothes on instead. And then, I reach a climax and ejaculate in my underwear. What i want to ask you is, can my girlfriend get pregnant if we did something like that?

Dear Alx,

Please be careful in your love life. You have reached the third step in a sexual relationship with your girlfriend. You have done kissing, necking and petting. Kissing is a passionate kiss, Necking is to seduce the neck area or to kiss one's neck deeply. And Petting is to seduce each other's sexual organ but no intercourse.

Doing Petting with all your clothes on still provide a chance of getting pregnant. We all know that spermatozoids swim like fish when they are in liquid medium. When a woman is in the arousal state, the vagina area is getting wet then can also wetten her trousers/shorts. Spermatozoids which is ejaculated into your underwear can swim through your clothes' pore and go through inside the vagina.
Someone has reported in a radio-broadcast session "BUKA PINTU" in 106,85 MHz "MARA FM" radio station, Bandung, (maybe you have heard it before), that doing Petting, even when you are wearing a Blue Jeans, can also result pregnancy. Well, I hope this won't happen to you

Sex Q & A: Where is G-Spot located?

2007-05-31T21:09:00.000+07:00

Pri, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor,

I’m a 28 year-old man and will be married soon. I’d like to know, where is the exact location of G-Spot and how can I stimulate it?

Dear Pri in Indonesia,

Thank you for your question, so you are asking about about G-SPOT. O.k. let’s see. G-SPOT is an area that is reported as an area which have a lot of nerves and this can brings much sexual stimulation to women or men.

In women, G-Spot is located in vagina, on the upper wall about 3-4 cm from the opening, right on the back of the pubic bone. Then, how can you reach it? You can try to reach it manually by your fingers because it is very hard to reach it by your penis. Manually you can follow the upper wall of her vagina start from the back of clitoris then go inside following the urethra and follow down till you reach the pubic bone and in the back of that pubic bone is the G-Spot.

In men, reported by dr. Man Tak Chia, G-Spot is located between anus and the base of testicles.

Sex Q & A: I have problem getting satisfaction from the one i love

2007-05-31T21:03:00.000+07:00

N_Vos, USA:

Dear Doctor, I have a strange problem. I am 18 years old, and had my first sexual experience 2 years ago. It was with my girlfriend, who i cared about. I consider myself oversexed, having started masturbationg at the age of 9. i have many fantasies, usually involving somone i don;t know, or barely know. MY problem, is that i have trouble getting a lot of pleasure from a girl that i love or care about. I have yet to cum with one of my girlfriends, but i had sex with my married next door neighbor, and it was great. But with my girlfriend that i love it is difficult.

Dearest N_Vos, USA

Your problem is not too strange - You started masturbation at the age of 9 that was a little bit early I guess, but not really abnormal ,13 % boys start doing masturbation at the age of 10.

You are not really oversexed , your tension is high due to hormonal instability of your body , soon it will be normal again in your twenties. This is the cause of all your fantasies too.

About your problem, that you get more pleasure making love with your married next-door neighbor than the girl you loved, was really understandable because your girlfriend has no experience in making love and was really afraid to do so, in contrary your mature neighbor enjoys it.

Sex Q & A: We usually had sex 3 - 4 times daily, My wife can't keep up, please help!

2007-05-31T20:59:00.000+07:00

Yuzz, Malaysia:

Dear Doctor,

Thank you for your time to have discussion with me. I have been married about 2 years ago. The problem is that i want frequent sex with my wife. This is because i have a strong desire to have sex. We usually do this 3-4 times a day. Because of that, my wife told me that she often feel very tired. We have had a big fight once because i often want frequent sex. Is there any way for me to co-op with this problem? Please help me doctor, i'm really nervous about this problem. That's for now. I hope that you can help me to gain happiness in my family. For your information i have 5 feets, 8 inches height and 144 pound weight.

Dearest Yuzz in Malaysia

Well, as i said before that marriage is like unplugging a watertank. Sexual desire which is forbidden before married by religion, is released after you two get married. It is understandable that the opening of forbidden value is becoming an flood in the early years/months of your marriage. The several arousal is very enormous.

You can perform sex 3-4 times a day. Actually 3-4 times is still normal because some of the people do this 10-12 times a day, even sometimes 20 times in the day and night. That's why we know as newly wed goes for honeymoon after wedding. They go to a far, isolated place just to prevent them from disturbance. This way they can have sex as often as they want. This overwhelmed desire can be loosen to a normal frequency in the following years. It is recommended for the married couple, not to have a baby too soon and can have sex as frequent as they want. So, please use contraception in the 3-6 early months of your marriage, if it's going to normal slope then you can get pregnant if you want.

A normal sex frequency is very relative. It is influenced by many things. The First thing is husband and wife's sexual desire. The second thing is how good your sexual cooperation with your wife. A bad sexual cooperation can lead into a bad sexual quality. A good sexual quality has to be enjoyed by both sides. Don't do masturbation in your marriage. What i mean about masturbation in this term is that a husband who doesn't care about his wife's sexual satisfaction. A good cooperation also needs the same sexual preference. If both sides agree about a sexual position then it can be enjoyed by both sides. But, if there's one of you disagree about a sexual preference then one of you can't enjoy this sexual activity. This is a bad sexual quality.

So, the conclusion is that sexual frequency depends on how good is the quality of your sex life. If your sex life is good, of course there isn't any problems to have a frequent sexual activity. Try to talk gently with your wife and ask her about things she doesn't like in your sexual activity and also the things she likes. This way i hope can help you enhance your sex life quality and brings happiness to your family.

Is it True? Masturbation can result into impotency or premature ejaculation

2007-05-24T21:51:00.000+07:00

Masturbating too often can result into impotency. Is it True?

A myth that says, "masturbating too often can result into impotency or premature ejaculation".
Actually there’s no physical causes that masturbating can result into impotency/premature ejaculation. If there is an impact on sexual function caused by masturbating, it will be just because of psychological factor. Maybe there’s a guilty feeling that causes erectile function on men. So, there’s no physical connection on masturbating and disfunction of sexual organs.

Sex Q&A: My Husband lose his erection everytime he uses a condom

2007-05-24T21:38:00.000+07:00

Hn, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor,

I’m a 32 year-old woman, married and already have two kids. We were planning not to have more child, and we’ve tried using condom and calendar system for contraception. The problem is, my husband’s penis always lose its erection everytime he uses condom. Is there any side-effects on condom? I’m afraid that if we stop using condoms, I will get pregnant again. It is not healthy for woman at my age is it? Thank you!

Dear Mrs. Hn in Indonesia,

You have planned not to have child anymore, well, that’s a good idea. It shows that you already have wide knowledge and you have also understand health very well. You told that you are tired of using condoms for contraception. Your problem is that everytime your husband use condom his penis loses its erection. That’s absolutely not the side-effect of condoms. I think it is about psychological matter. He may feel less enjoyable if using condom. As we know, sometimes they put some additive or substance that can reduce the penis sensitivity (we know it as the "long life" condoms). If your husband use these condoms, it may not be easy for him to get an erection because they reduce his pleasure.

The use of condoms or drugs to have a long sexual performance is intended only for woman’s pleasure. Then, if a woman can get her pleasure, psychologically we hope that it also happens to her partner. By seeing her partner/wife enjoys it so much then it will trigger confidence and sensation to a man. Physical pleasure or orgasm can only be reached if he had put off the condom and ejaculated. That’s what you have to tell your husband about.

A second possibility is that the condom maybe too small for your husband’s penis (we know that condom has various sizes). This can cause pain to your husband’s penis instead. Another possibility is that if your husband’s penis is too short then the base of the condom will stay in roll. This can also cause pain to your husband’s penis, so he might lose his erection.

There’s one advice from me. If you really intend to stop having a child, then stop using condoms for contraception. We know that condom could also fail to stop pregnancy and statistically, the rate is quite high. If you feel enough with two kids already, then try another method of contraception such as diapraghm, or you can also try sterilization for much safer method.

Sex Q & A: I didn't bleed on my first time..

2007-05-23T16:07:00.000+07:00

Ani, Indonesia:

Dear Doctor,

I'm a 26 year-old woman and have just been married. Right now, I have a big problem. I did not bleed after first penetration on my wedding night. My husband suspected that i have had sexual relationship with another man before married. I sweared that i have never had sex before, doc. I've ever heard that there's kind of hymen which woouldn't break even if it is penetrated by penis, is it true doc? If it's true how can we check it whether it is classified into that group? Please I need your answer, I have trouble to explain it to my husband.

Dear Mrs. Ani in Indonesia,

You've just been married and had a big problem that you did not bleed after the first penetration on your wedding night. And then your husband suspected that you had slept with another man before, and that you have to swear to defend yourself. Your question is, how to check that your hymen whether it is still intact or not. Well, of course every gynaecologist can check it. The problem is, gynaecologist won't be able to tell you whether the hymen is broken by sexual intercourse or by some accidents such as intense sport activities or severe trauma.

I think it's better to let a gynaecologist explain it to your husband, and not you. Maybe you can explain it to a gynaecologist who can understand your problem and want to help you. In modern life, hymen is not always be broken by first penetration. If the hymen is not elastic enough then it will be broken during sport which require extreme movement.

So, if your husband want to have a 100% virgin woman, maybe he should marry a traditional woman who always wear "kebaya". They should be still 100% virgin because they cannot move freely with that kind of clothes.

What Men always worried about virginity is that women usually have deep feeling with a man with whom she get her first sex-experience. You know that to women, first impression couldn't easiliy be removed from their memory. So if you already have good impression about your first sexual experience with another man, it could endanger your marriage if conflict occured. I hope it's clear enough. I suggest that both of you visit a gynaecologist who can help you and really want to help you.

Is it True that Women will feel more satisfied if sexual intercourse is done in longer time.

2007-05-22T17:01:00.000+07:00

Women will feel more satisfied if sexual intercourse is done in longer time. Is it True?

Women will get more satisfaction if sexual intercourse is being performed longer. This is only a myth because not all women likes sex that performed too long. Longer time sometimes needed to give woman a chance to have orgasm first. As we know before, women needs more time than men to have orgasm.

According to Prof. Master & Johnson, men only needs 2-5 minutes to get orgasm, but in women, they need 10-20 minutes before orgasm. So, I think it's clear that if sexual activity is performed below 10 minutes, it is very hard for women to reach orgasm. Longer time in sexual activity has also possibilities of unpleasancy for women.

If sexual activity that performed longer than usual and accompanied by woman's multiple orgasm, it would give a woman more satisfactory feeling. But if this woman can't reach orgasm in this sexual activity, this would lead into torture on woman. We know that longer sexual activity requires good lubrication on vagina. Lubrication on women could only happen if they had enough sexual arousal.

So, if this long trip to heaven couldn't give woman orgasm, there will be no lubrication and her vagina will be dried of this activity. Her vagina can get bruises and sometimes get bleeding. Of course this is a torture to a woman.

Sex Q & A: "How long will it take normally until a man ejaculate?"

2007-05-22T16:55:00.000+07:00

Nle, Malaysia:

Dear Doctor,

I just wonder how long normally a sexual intercourse will last from the moment of inserting the penis into the vagina until the man come? Roughly how many stroke it take before a man come?

Dearest Nle,

According to DR Master & DR Johnson , USA, normally ejaculation will happen 4 minutes after intermission in male (2 to 5 minutes). About how many strokes depends on the class you played, are you in the class of Pete Samprass or rather slow as Agassi. :)

Welcome to Sexclinique.net

2007-05-19T14:38:00.000+07:00

To those who has known the former sexclinique.com site, Welcome Back!
and to those who just visited sexclinique.net, Welcome to the site.

Sexclinique.net is an inherit of sexclinique.com site which provides you an online consultation on sexual & sexual health problems, as well as pregnancy and other human reproduction issues.

I'm proud to re-introduce you to the brilliant, understanding and humorous Gynaecologist, dr. Hanny Ronosulistyo, DSOG.

Once again, welcome back and have a healthy conversation in this blog.

Regards