A Nuevo Southern Peach

A Week of Rest and Repose

2006-05-09T18:46:00.000-04:00

I am slowly but surely chipping away at receiving a bona fide college education. Well, usually I am - just not this week. That's right, it's vacation time baby! I have one week off before the summer semester starts and since I'm not working that means every day is a golden gift of free time. I have a few important things to tend to like securing a shiny new job and cleaning up my apartment for a soon approaching visit from my Grandma but other than that I am goofing off one hundred percent of the time.

One of my favorite activities of late has been sitting out on my balcony and catching up on some recreational reading. I don’t have quite enough time (or the funds) to travel but every book I pick up takes me to new and wonderful places. True, a lot of people are murdered in these places but I always manage to survive until the end. (Agatha Christie, John Grisham, Dan Brown, Clive Cussler and Mary Higgins Clark have been my most recent travel agents.)

I just finished On the Street Where You Live and while I enjoyed it immensely, I made the mistake of reading it late into the night while I was home alone. The basic premise is a woman who is being stalked and the discovery of a serial killer in the neighbored she just moved to. Ordinarily that's just the kind of over-the-top suspense that I enjoy but on a night when I can't deadbolt the door it's a little creepy. Sometimes I do not make good decisions. Oh well.

If everything continues in this delightful albeit somewhat lazy pattern, I will have a great vacation. Even as I type this I’m sitting on my roommate's incredibly comfortable papasan chair on the balcony enjoying the weather. It’s probably going to rain soon but I’m safe here under the overhang. I've been watching the neighborhood kids play and they’ve just learned how to shoot small sticks out of water guns. The fact that it’s dangerous only makes it more awesome. A lot of cute dogs and their nondescript owners were out walking but they’ve all gone inside now that wind is blowing stronger and clouds have made the sky gray. Being in the fresh air is nice and later in the week I plan on being more active since sunshine is predicted. For now I'm content and that's a nice feeling.

The Pointer Sisters would be proud

2006-05-08T19:26:00.000-04:00

My heart was filled with joy and laughter when Adult Swim added Saved By the Bell reruns to their April schedule. Now that time has come and gone and it has left me nostalgic for the kids of Bayside High and the days in which I looked to them as role models. Those were simpler times. Sure the show was campy and preachy but I didn't know any kid who didn't want to be at least one of the characters and date another. My sister is still in love with Mark Gosselaar. How could she not be?

One of the best parts of the reruns was the commercials that aired to promote them. Of course the network zeroed in on everyone's favorite episode "Jessie's Song" in which Jessie takes caffeine pills and freaks out. (I'm proud to say that I can recite more than a few lines of that episode as well as the dialogue from Zack and Kelly's breakup. What can I say, I love that show.) Watching that scene in slow-motion was both hilarious and awesome.

I’m pretty sure Jessie started some kind of trend because these days cold medicine is kept behind the counter. At Wal-Mart you have to take a card to the pharmacist and then show ID if you want a decongestant. Soon we won't be able to get Sudafed without bringing in snotty Kleenexes as proof that we won't be taking it just for the buzz. When I first watched the show I didn't know anyone who "did drugs" and I assumed I never would. Now that I've been through college I've seen everything from recreational users to serious addicts. The world is a different place than I thought it would be. One thing remains the same though. Screech is a loveable dork. You can’t argue with that.

Long time, no sea.

2006-05-08T17:21:00.000-04:00

I know that's a terrible pun. This is just my way apologizing for an unconscionably long absence. You can't be mad at Garfield right? Right.

A lot has changed for me since my last post, most notably my job. As in I don't have one right now. Hopefully that won't be the case for long and I'll be able rejoin the ranks of the gainfully employed with my head held high. Maybe I’ll get into some of the other changes later on. For now, let’s get on with the blogging.

I received this postcard from a dentist's office that was reminding me to make my next appointment. What it really reminded me of is how annoying I find puns. I know what you're thinking, "Wow, her first post in months and she's alienating the entire pun-loving population." I know it's risky but that's how much I don't like puns. Are they clever? Sure, sometimes. Do kids everywhere love them? The ones I know do. And yet puns irk me. They get under my skin in a creepy-crawly way. Maybe I was tormented by some punster at an early age. Maybe my genetic code is inherently intolerant of puns. Either way I’d rather have satire and sarcasm. Now that’s comedy you can sink your teeth into.

While I’m probably not in the majority I know I’m not alone. Think about every time you’ve heard a pun used in your social circle. A few people laugh, a few people groan, and everyone else waits in awkward silence for the moment to pass. Those are my people. Why can’t we even muster up a courtesy laugh? The truth is that we’re restraining ourselves. We’re just barely containing an outburst denouncing the use of puns in everyday life. But we choke down that urge in an effort to be polite. After all, it's our problem not yours.

So the next time you fashion a clever pun please be kind. Make it short and sweet and just say it once. We're already on the edge. Don't push us over.

Warm Fuzzies

2005-11-12T23:49:00.000-05:00

Are you too old for teddy bears but not quite ready to sleep alone? Do you wish deadly diseases could be more cuddly and approachable? The answer to all your troubles can be found in these stuffed animals from Giantmicrobes Inc. I've seen these little guys at a children's museum and at a doctor's offices and now they're available to take home. Who wouldn't want a fuzzy embodiment of bad breath or an ulcer? They make great conversation pieces.

Among the more extreme microbes offered are syphilis, black death, ebola, gonorrhea, and flesh eating virus with a little knife and fork embroidered on the front. How cute!

Remember, there's no better way to say, "Hey man, you should get tested."

It was as high as an elephant’s eye.

2005-11-10T18:57:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the absence but I've been quite ill. Other than a visit to the doctor I've just been resting and recuperating and taking a whole lot of pills. The most exciting thing in my week was VH1's special about Paris Hilton's most shocking moments. Yeah, that's hot.

Last weekend I went with Asmir to Cagle's Dairy for my annual Halloween trip to a corn maze. There's nothing like running around a maze in the dark to make you feel both young and old at the same time. I felt like a kid when we were taking wrong turns and trying to remember if we'd been through that patch of corn before. I felt like a grandma when I told some junior high girls that they were going to get in trouble for running and calling one of the workers fat. Sure enough they got kicked out a short while later. I tried to warn them but they wouldn't listen to their elders. Darn whippersnappers.

If you have a corn maze in your area, give it a try. They often have other activities like hay rides, bonfires, pumpkin patches and games. If you live in Georgia check out Uncle Shuck's corn maze in Dawsonville. On a few nights near Halloween the maze becomes haunted and you have to dodge ghosts and ghouls to escape the maze in tack. The spooky atmosphere makes it even more fun.

Well, if you haven't noticed by now I'll come out and say it. I love holidays. I'm a celebration-holic. I don't want help; I just want to convert others. Join me.

Holiday Extravaganza

2005-11-04T16:47:00.000-05:00

My office goes all out for the holidays. That works out well since I love to decorate and celebrate for any occasion. We share a building with a large cooperation and unfailing our neighbors trail down, peeking their heads in and asking if they can walk around and take a look. This Halloween desks were decorated, candy was in place and we dressed up. Anyone who has children is invited to bring them in to trick-or-treat and enjoy the festivities. Usually we have quite a few. This year we had one. One three year old spider man for all that candy. He was incredibly cute and made my day when he spent about 10 minutes trying to convince one of my co-workers to take off her pants. "It's ok you can just do. Do it, come on. Just take them off." His father must be so proud.

To make up for the small turn out we're going to start early on the Christmas decorating. Last year every desk was wrapped like a present and this year were going for a Winter Wonderland theme with lights and ornament. It's going to be crazy. I love it! I'm mentally going over the decorations I have at home and what I can steal from my parentss garage. No matter how far I go with the decorations here's one t-shirt I won't be wearing. How gross is that?

Magnet for Madness

2005-11-03T14:30:00.000-05:00

It appears that I and my car are magnets for all things wacky on the road. In addition to the usual terrible traffic and crazy drivers in Atlanta, lately I have been subject to a variety of road debris. I manage to avoid most of it. The mattresses, the trash bags, the blown tires and hubcaps are all easy to see and navigate around. Over the past few weeks however I've been bested by more than my fair share of road wreckage.

First there was a rise in the frequency of random pieces of junk passing under my car without incident. Then a few weeks ago there was a sheet of particle board on a freeway - I ran over it. Today it was some sort of fender in the fast lane on GA 400. Do to circumstances beyond my control I bumped it. Don't look down on me; the guy behind me bumped it too. The one that really drove me crazy was a plastic bucket. It was way over in the furthest right hand lane and everyone was driving around it. One truck didn't see it and nicked it sending it spiraling directly in front of my car. There was nothing I could do. It smacked right into the grill of my car. I flipped on my emergency lights and pulled over. The bucket was wedged right under my bumper! Luckily a tow truck stopped to see if I needed assistance and the man managed to pry the bucket out for me. My car appears to be fine although I'll have to check more thoroughly after today's incident.

I'm really not a bad driver. I'm not a professional and I do need glasses to read signs that are far away but I think I would do ok if it weren't for all the trash on the road. The sad thing is that sometimes I'll see the same mattress/trash bag/hubcap on the freeway in the same spot for two or three days before it gets cleaned up. Who loses a mattress and doesn't call someone to get it off the road? [Obviously Atlantans.]

Did I mention that I've also been cut off by three different eighteen wheelers? I know that's off topic but it's terrifying. Maybe I'll start taking the bus. Or Limos. Yeah, a limo sounds good. Is anyone out there willing to donate to the Cali Girl Limo fund? It would really help me out. If it I hit one more thing I may really freak out.

Sweet Dreams

2005-10-28T13:51:00.000-04:00

As the days get colder I find myself hunkering down under the blankets more and more. I wrap myself in a throw blanket while I watch TV and I climb under the covers to read or talk on the phone. It's delightful but a little tricky. You see, when I'm that cozy I often get sleepy. I've been know to drift away on the couch during movies and there have been plenty of times when I have had to put my book down because my eyes were just too heavy to keep open. That was never a problem for me as I love a good nap.

It's my new behavior that is a little troublesome. I've been drifting off in the middle of conversations. While on the phone and lying under the covers I closed my eyes and soon heard myself say, "No Mork, don't go in the water." I was speaking to the turtle I had begun to dream about. He was diving into a lake and after watching Invasion I wanted to warn him of what was out there. Oops. On the next occasion I was cuddling under the blankets with the Bosnian Boyfriend and we were talking about our days when I muttered, apropos of nothing, "I don't think you should get lasik." Of course neither of us had any idea what I was talking about. Oops again. Both occasions were late at night when I was already lacking sleep but that's no excuse for rude behavior. I've got to get a handle on this. I think I need to cast off my blankets and save them for bedtime. And movie time. Or when I have a good book. What? They're baby steps.

Why I never saw Jaws

2005-10-27T15:54:00.000-04:00

I don't know why but bodies of water and their inhabitants have been on my mind lately. Maybe it's because I've been watching Invasion or reading Swim at Your Own Risk. All of this has reminded me of a rather odd fear that I have. I'm afraid of sharks . . . in the swimming pool.

Let me clarify. I know there aren't sharks in there. It's impossible. How would one get in? Most sharks are salt water creatures anyway. Even if a fresh water shark did get into the pool, it couldn't survive in all that chlorine. If by some miracle a shark was living in the pool, I would see it before I got in. I know all this and yet sometimes when I'm swimming I'm overcome by the feeling that something no good is in the water and I have to get out IMMEDIATELY. It's ridiculous. But my twin sister has the same irrational fear.

We've decided that it must go back to our childhood when my grandparents had a house in Kent Woodlands (CA) with a pool. The floor of the pool was tiled and in the deep end there was an image of a blue dolphin. I don't remember being scared of the dolphin but I think that sometimes as we would swim we would see the creature unclearly through the water and that's what freaked us out.

I'm not paralyzed by this fear and I hardly ever get that creepy feeling anymore. It's just once in a while but when it hits I'm honestly terrified. Isn't that strange?

If something so small can affect my subconscious in such a dramatic way I wonder in what other ways my childhood has marked and molded me. There are probably a thousand small events to explain why I am the way I am if only I could realize or remember them.

Do you have any irrational fears (with or without explanations)? What quirks do you have than can be attributed to events from your early life? I shared mine, now it's your turn if you want to take it.

But Ron, how can one product do all that?!

2005-10-26T17:28:00.000-04:00

After a bout of insomnia last night I rediscovered a lost love. Infomercials. That's right, you heard correctly. I *love* infomercials. I love the cheesy salesmen and the over-the-top audience. I love the outrageous demonstrations and the skeptical volunteers. But mostly I love the useless products that I suddenly can't live without.

"I have a special offer for you today Jan. You'll get the Mr. Handy Juicer, the multi-purpose flashlight, the sandwich cutters, two sushi rollers, a lifetime supply of car wax, the eighty-seven piece tupperware set with interchangeable lids, the pasta maker, the hair extensions, the six Husky puppies and the authentic Amish butter churn for only eighteen payments of $33.33."

"All that for only eighteen payments of $33.33? Ron, you must be joking!"

"It's no joke Jan. and if you order now we'll throw in thirty-seven steak knives and my firstborn child FOR FREE. That's over a nineteen hundred dollar value!"

"Incredible! But how do I order?"

Ah, there's no better cure for boredom or a little late night restlessness. Last night I started halfway through a commercial for the Magic Bullet and by the time the Lauren Hutton's ad for her Face Disk was getting underway I was fast asleep on the couch.

Don't be fooled, infomercial watching is a dangerous sport. The gadgets are captivating and I often find myself wondering if I wouldn't be happier with my own rotisserie or buckets and buckets of multipurpose cleaning solution. I happen to own (through no fault of my own) both the Windsor Pilates full disk set and an original Revo Stlyer. In my defense, the Revo Styler was purchased at a Bed Bath and Beyond and not through the mail. I love both products and still use the Pilates DVDs although I tired of the Revo Styler after about a year and a half.

The moral of this story is watch and enjoy infomercials but don't let Ron sucker you. He's crafty.

2005-10-25T14:54:00.000-04:00

If you need a good, quick laugh check out this post.

A chill in the air

2005-10-25T14:25:00.000-04:00

Apparently fall has finally reached Atlanta. After last week's gorgeous weather (the temperature ranged from highs of 80 to 86) I woke up yesterday to an icy wind. I thought it would warm up during the day but it only got windier. Tonight the temperature will drop to the mid 30s. Oh well, we had a nice long run of warm weather. I happen to have a winter coat that I absolutely love (although my Bosnian Boyfriend refers to it as "that big-ass coat") and I'm excited to wear it again. I bought it when I first moved to Georgia a few years ago but I still get compliments on it. Yea! I've also become a big fan of scarves. Having previously lived in California I had never heard of freeze warnings or ice storms and I had never owned a scarf. Now I adore them and their delightful neck-warming ways. I have a bright red one with matching gloves that goes quite well with the aforementioned coat. Yesterday morning I was hoping the day would get warmer but now I can't wait for it to get colder. I suppose that's good since it is the end of October already. Now I just need to secure a pair of sexy boots and I'll be ready for whatever Mother Nature can throw at me. Bring on the ice storms!

Wait, how many milliliters are in a cup?

2005-10-24T14:22:00.000-04:00

You know how it is when it's late at night and the conversation begins to wander. You end up talking about the craziest things and no one knows how you got onto that topic. That was the situation on Friday night after a late viewing of Serenity. Somehow we ended up in a heated conversation about America and the metric system. Americans and Eastern Europeans agreed, base ten is just easier. If we switched now it wouldn't be so horrible and our society wouldn't crumble. The pros definitely outweigh the cons.

Pros: Most items for sale are already marked with both English and Metrics measurement. Entering the scientific field would be less daunting for many people. You could do conversions in your head!

Cons: Most of us would have to buy new dry measuring cups. For a while parents might have trouble helping kids with their homework .

As you can see, it's mostly just stubbornness that keeps us doing what we've always done.

My sister Abby summed up our argument with this gem. "What's twelve times thirty? Fuck if I know. What's ten times thirty? [Whole car in unison] "Three hundred."

FYI: Tears are not a good present.

2005-10-21T15:50:00.000-04:00

So yesterday an ex-boyfriend of one of my co-workers totally made her cry. . . at work. . . on her birthday! Jackass much?

Note to men: If a relationship ends badly, we probably don't want to be friends. Sure, after some time has passed it might be a possibility but for it to work (and I must stress this) you can't be a jackass. I know a birthday seems like the right time to call. If you’re pleasant and congratulatory it might be the beginning of rebuilding the friendship. If you force your ex to rehash the breakup, it's just a bad idea and you have fallen into jackass territory.

Here are a few other moves that will brand you as a jackass.

The Emotional Fake out - A woman tells you she's not ready for a serious relationship because she doesn't want to get hurt. You talk her into becoming exclusive and break up with her a week latter.
The Last-Minute Ditch - You cancel longstanding or important plans at the last minute on a whim.
The Hallmark Hater - You forget (or don't care about) birthdays and anniversaries when you're in a long term relationship. They're important to us. Just pretend for one day that you care.
The Cheating Liar - You tell your significant other that you want to slow down when what you really want is to sleep with someone else and not have her find out.
The Ultimate Jackass - You want out of a relationship but don't want anyone to get "hurt" so you act like a jerk until she breaks up with you.

Unfortunately these are all things that have happened to women I know. Don't get me wrong, I could make another list of wonderful things that non-jackass men have done for the women in their lives. Just not today.

Boo. (Not the scary kind)

2005-10-20T17:28:00.000-04:00

I wrote this post a while ago but I waited to publish it so as to protect everyone’s anonymity. One of the great things about online diaries and blogs is that you can write whatever you want and be relatively free of judgment. (If of course you filter your comments). It's in that spirit that I post this.

I was checking out a new web site and it seemed pretty interesting. The author had something to say and she said it well. Towards the end of the page however I read something that I recognized but I couldn't remember where I had seen it before. Not just a quote but at least ten paragraphs that I knew I had read somewhere previously. I checked the comments on the site and saw that she owned up to not being the author, but she was unapologetic about having used someone else’s work in a venue where it would clearly be thought of as her own. She claimed to have rewritten the article but really only a few names and sentences were changed at all.

The whole thing bothers me because the author of the original article is quite good and may be trying to make a living through writing. It's wonderful to have something you wrote published, and it's equally as upsetting to have someone else get credit for anything that you put your time and energy into. I have to wonder why she didn't feel badly about using someone else's work. What she did is the definition of plagiarism, which can be illegal. In her defense, I'm it may have simply been a lapse in judgment since she wasn't publishing the writing or making any money from it. I don't want to defame her or discredit her other writing which is why I'm not naming her site.

The internet has raised so my property rights issues that this may be the least of anyone's problems. It does sadden me a bit because I immediately flashed back to every middle school, high school, and college class where a teacher or professor spent a lot of time convincing us how immoral it was to present someone else's writing as out own. I guess this writer was absent on those days.

Userpers!

2005-10-18T15:50:00.000-04:00

Are my eyes deceiving me? I think I just saw Cinderella and her beloved fairy Godmother in an ad for the Swiffer Wet Jet. Another part of my childhood just slipped through the cracks and became part of mass commercialism.

The ad isn't even logical. Cinderella never would have had a wet jet and here's why. Her stepmother (Lady Tremaine) made her do rough chores out of spite. The wicked woman hated that Cinderella was more beautiful than her stepsisters and wouldn't have given her something to make the tasks easier. When Cinderella made a wish it wasn't to get out of the chores, it was to have someone love her like when her father was alive. She wouldn't have been happy working as a drudge in her stepmother's kitchen even if she had a wet jet. ~Sigh~ I should write a scathing letter to Procter & Gamble.

Walt Disney must be turning in his grave - or rotating in his cryogenic chamber.

Updos and let downs

2005-10-18T15:29:00.000-04:00

My weekend was full of celebrations, some low key and some rather fancy. On Saturday I attended the wedding of two friends in a gorgeous church in Atlanta. It was a fun event and I enjoyed telling the story of how they were set up. It was nice to talk to a group of people that I haven't seen recently. We are planning a reunion but with new marriages, new jobs and new homes it’s hard to get together sometimes.

I had driven to the wedding with my sister and ended up staying the night at her on-campus apartment. There’s *always* something going on there no mater what time of night it is. Even as I was going to bed her boyfriend was leaving for yet another keg party. It sounds fun but sometimes I just can’t keep up. Needless to say, when I woke up at 8:30 everyone else was still fast asleep.

Friday and Sunday nights were spent celebrating Asmir’s birthday. Since I wasn’t expecting him on Friday I hadn’t wrapped his present yet. He sat on the couch and watched football while I made a fort out of pillows so he couldn’t what I was wrapping. After all my hard work he tore through the paper in about two seconds and the celebrating continued. Since he is still fasting we stayed in both nights but I think a good time was had by all. In an unfortunate turn of events, both Kroger and Publix were out of the cinnamon muffin mix that I've raved about. I was going to make them instead of a cake and put them in the shape of his age. Now I'm wondering if I should have kept them a secret. Perhaps you all went out bought so many packs that all the stores have run out. Thanks a lot. Way to ruin my plans.

All in all it was a good weekend with plenty of cake. I got to wear a fancy dress and have fancy hair and I got to enjoy the fall weather with people I care about. What could be better than that?

Sixteen and counting

2005-10-14T14:59:00.000-04:00

Yowza. That's the only word I can think of to describe my feelings when I read this article. My paternal Grandma had eight children, each about a year apart. That seems like a big family to me but the Duggars topped them. By a lot. Even my dad admits that things could be crazy at times. Once all the kids were born they had to take two cars for family vacations, even though one car was a station wagon. Meals were a race to eat what you could before the other kids ate it all. Of course there are always good things about having a big family and that's what most of the stories I hear from my aunts and uncle are about.

In some ways my dad's upbringing worked out great for me. He had six sisters and only one brother. They all shared one bathroom. To this day he never leaves the seat up. Never. Hilariously, he often washes his face and brushes his teeth in the kitchen sink because that's what he did while growing up if someone else was using the bathroom. We weren't supposed to tell my mom about that but I have a sneaking suspicion that she knew.

This story is truly a testament to the restorative powers of the human body. It's a miracle that Michelle can still walk much less . . . you know . . ."visit the stork".

There are a lot of questions I would like to ask the Duggars. With fifteen kids in the house when did they find time to make the sixteenth? How do they do they dole out the chores? The older kids must be helping a lot to keep the household running. Do they get bulk rates for groceries? How do they celebrate birthdays? Even counting the twins they could still be having one birthday about every three and a half weeks. What about Christmas? Do they draw names or forego exchanging gifts all together? I'd like to be at the Duggar's home for Mothers’ Day. That woman must be worth her weight in macaroni necklaces and paper towel roll bouquets.

One last thought: Imagine the grandkids this couple will have, especially if their children follow in their reproductive footsteps. Yowza.

So The Internet says, so it must be

2005-10-12T16:18:00.000-04:00

Sometimes in life we don't know exactly what we are looking for. Of course the wisest thing to do is let the The Internet be our guide. Here's what it told me.

According to Google:

I need protection. (From who?)
I need a pacifier. (Do they make flavored ones?)
I need to marry a rich man and fast. (Thanks mom!)
I need to get a jet red lipstick & put it on immediately. (Too bad I don't have one in my purse.)
I need freedom and flexibility to manage many users with diverse needs. (I love managing users.)
I need a new agent. (Tell me about it. My sister and I could have been Ashley and Mary Kate.)
I need to know if Mortimer has anything on me to force me to return the estate. (Damn that Mortimer! He was always against me.)

Google is the new magic-8 ball. If you want to give it a shake try typing "[your name] needs" in the search box and see what you come up with. Sometimes it's better than the advice I give myself.

Ouch.

2005-10-11T16:07:00.000-04:00

Click the comic for a more readable image.

Just say no to jigs.

2005-10-11T15:56:00.000-04:00

I don't have any overwhelming feelings about Ashlee Simpson or her music. I don't love her or hate her or even think about her that much. With that said, I recorded her second Saturday Night Live appearance this weekend hoping that she would mess up and humiliate herself anew. I knew the chances were slim and that she probably planned on singing for herself this time but still I hoped.

Why am I so malevolent? I'm really not sure. Maybe I'm jealous that she's young, pretty and rich. Maybe I need to see other people fail to feel better about my own failures. Maybe I thought it was funny the first time and wanted another good laugh.

Nothing out of the ordinary happened and I found myself fondly remembering the days when I watched SNL to enjoy the skits, not a guest star's humiliation. A few years ago when I realized that I fast-forward through most of the show I just stopped watching. What's was the point? I still enjoy Weekend Update but it seems silly to watch a ninety minute show for a ten minute segment. We have The Daily Show now. I moved on.

Sure, SNL has turned out a lot of stars but I haven't laughed out loud while watching it since Will Ferrell screamed for more cowbell. Lorn Michaels and his team still seem to have a lot of pull though; maybe they'll revamp the show to make it worth staying home for again. I'd settle for not wanting to skip every skit after the first two minutes. At least we'll always have our "Best of" DVDs.

A battle of witts.

2005-10-11T14:53:00.000-04:00

A night out at the movies with Anna turned out to be a night of driving around and a dvd viewing at my place. It was tons of fun though and we accomplished our goal of eating Chili's Quesadilla Explosion Salads. Usually I'm not one to get a salad if I'm going to bother to go out to eat but these are not ordinary salads. For one thing, the salad is topped with four slices of quesadilla. That already trumps any salad I've every had. Add about a quarter pound of other ingredients and just enough lettuce to legitimize the "salad" claim and that was my diner. It was delicious. (At this point I'm wondering how many of my posts revolve around food. I should probably check into that/get help.)

Later that night Anna suggested that people should
but I countered that .

We're in a deadlock. What do you think?

Can I take your order?

2005-10-08T18:21:00.000-04:00

I just had a food-gasm. We all know that The Colonel puts an addictive chemical in his chicken that makes you crave it fortnightly (tm Stuart MacKenzie), but I think some exec at Taco Bell stole the formula and is using too. I haven't had Taco Bell in almost a year but one smell of my roommate's taco sent me dashing across the street for some of the same. I know nothing sold there contains a single ingredient found in nature but I couldn't resist. Bonus: I spent less than three bucks for an entire dinner. It was delicious. I regret nothing. Let us never speak of this again.

The start of a crazy weekend

2005-10-07T16:05:00.000-04:00

I have big Friday night plans. Try not to be jealous. It will be tough but try and keep it together. Ok, here goes. Asmir (the Bosnian boyfriend) and I are going to stop by the store for "ingredients" and then make cinnamon and blueberry muffins. It's gonna be wild and crazy. *Sigh* You're jealous. I knew this would happen.

Actually, he's been working hard and fasting this week so we're just going to take it easy. We're both broke and we've seen enough movies lately so a night in is in order. It was his idea to bake; he really likes cinnamon muffins. I think he has some other activities planned but they won't be posted here. (I'd probably get a lot more readers if they were.)

Seriously though, if you like fresh baked goods without the effort of baking or the expense of a bakery get Martha White muffin mixes. They're inexpensive and all you do is add milk or water and then bake for about fifteen minutes. The muffins are sooo good. They're especially yummy the morning after an actual wild night.

Get Squished

2005-10-07T15:48:00.000-04:00

No, I'm not talking about squeezing into last year's jeans although that is a related topic.

Today my office celebrated Lee National Denim Day. Everyone who made a five dollar donation to the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation got to wear jeans to work, a treat we seldom get to enjoy. Since it's the tenth anniversary of the event we agreed to up the donations to ten dollars apiece. Not everyone in our office participates but enough people do that the foundation ends up with a nice little chunk of change. The best part is watching brokers who usually wear suits and ties come up with a work appropriate outfit involving jeans. One gentleman in our office wears black pants, a white shirt, and a tie every day. He says it's the only way he knows that all his clothes match. When he wears jeans he pairs them with a white polo shirt; at least he's trying.

You may be aware that October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. In an interesting effort to promote awareness, Katie Couric underwent a mammogram and had it shown on the air this week. You can check out the footage on the Today Show's homepage. Apparently she did the same thing in 2000 with an on-air colonoscopy and the nation's testing average jumped twenty percent that year. Kudos to her. She's a braver woman than I am.

You already know the moral of the story. Ladies: 1.) Self-check monthly 2.) Don't skip your yearly checkup. Men: encourage the woman in your life to do those things. It's worth it. That concludes this week's PSA.