"And I shall yet praise Him"

Great Things

2008-04-10T18:18:00.002-04:00

“And the house which I build is great: for great is our God above all gods.” 2 Chronicles 2:5

Here I am in Taiwan again for a few days. Since my time is short and its uncertain when I’ll get another chance to come back, I have been trying to see all my favorite people, eat all my favorite foods and basically squeeze as much enjoyment out of my time here that I can.

Yesterday I treated myself to a day at my favorite hair salon. Miss Yang is the only one I trust to cut my hair. I let her give me the full treatment—hair cut and straightened, manicure and pedicure. It turned out to be the perfect opportunity for her to train a couple of new girls too. She is good at what she does and is proud of her work. I was impressed with her thorough explanations and detailed guidance. She teaches her students to do every step correctly in order to have a great finish. No sloppiness or short cuts allowed!

One can assume Miss Yang strives for high quality work for many reasons—perhaps to make a name for herself, to build a solid clientele base, or personal pride in a job well done. Such commitment to excellence for an “everyday job” is admirable and inspiring. I thought, how much more committed should we be when attempting to do things for God!

When David’s son, Solomon, began to attempt something for God, he called it “great!” While the building of Solomon’s Temple did make him famous, that was not his purpose. He stated his purpose quite clearly—the house I build will be great because God is great! The overarching goal in everything we attempt to do for God should be to magnify the Lord and show His greatness, as the one true “God above all gods.” I'm reminded of a phrase I heard many years ago which inspired me then and still does now:

Attempt great things for God—Expect great things from God!

What are you attempting to do “great” for God today?

Do You Hear It?

2007-12-31T23:07:00.000-05:00

“…When thou shalt hear a sound of going in the tops of the mulberry trees, then thou shalt go out to battle, for God is gone forth before thee.” 1 Chronicles 14:15

As the old year ends and the new one begins. I am making a resolve to fine-tune my spiritual ears to listen for the sound of going in the tops of the mulberry trees. The sound of leaves rustling is not what one would expect to signal a charge into a battle. But then God doesn’t have to fit into a mold of our making. Unlike the sharp, piercing sound of a gun shot that signals a race, the sound God chooses is soft and gentle, requiring close attention to know the precise moment to begin. There can be no allowance for distractions, for to lose focus would be to miss the signal.

The danger here is going too soon—ahead of God—or lagging behind resulting in missed opportunities. I do not know what kinds of battles I will face in 2008, but of this I am sure: I do not want to go anywhere unless God goes before me. Such a decision requires absolute trust. My life verse has become Psalm 18:30 "As for God, His way is perfect..." I would never have chosen the hard path of the last few years which the Lord chose for me, but seeing His hand through it and in it, neither would I change it now. I used to know in my head about the sovereignty of God. Now I really know it--in my heart.

So with renewed courage, a good dose of patience, and faith in a trustworthy Lord, I look forward to 2008. I have lots of plans, but I’m listening for the rustling of leaves.

In the way

2007-10-21T23:40:00.000-04:00

“I being in the way, the Lord led me…” Genesis 24:27

To have confidence of being exactly in the center of God’s will is a precious thing. It takes faith and it takes persistence even when at times there may be doubts. In Genesis the story of Abraham’s servant, Eliezer’s search for Isaac a bride is a fantastic snapshot of the way God sends confirmation through divine appointment. Before Eliezer could finish voicing his prayer for guidance, Rebecca arrived. The circumstances of answered prayer left no doubt of God’s intervention. Eliezer’s response was to worship the Lord (verse 26) and his explanation was simply, “I being in the way, the Lord led me!”

The lesson for me is that when I am in the place of God’s perfect will, I need only make myself available to see Him work through circumstances. “I being in the way…”—what an awesome phrase! This past week I experienced my own personal snapshot of God’s confirmation that I am where He wants me. My husband, Jerry, and I had the unique opportunity to go to the public high school and mingle with the students during lunch hour one day. To make a long story short, because of that visit I was made aware of a Chinese student in the school who is challenged in English. I offered my help and this coming week I will be translating so he can take the required state testing.

I don’t believe in coincidences with God. I am excited that He is giving me opportunity right here in the US to use my language skills and begin to make contact with the local Chinese community. I’m not sure what God has in mind, but I’m not concerned about that. I am confident that being in the way, the Lord will lead me!

No shame in hope

2007-09-30T23:45:00.000-04:00

“We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” Romans 5:3-5 (ESV)

And now for the final installment in the saga of The Pineapple Plant: When I returned to Taiwan in early August, the now famous pineapple was beginning to ripen and was too heavy to stand up. It literally had to be propped up so that it wouldn’t fall over. I was amazed at the huge leafy top it sported for such a small pineapple! (It certainly was the smallest full-grown pineapple I had ever seen.) After another week or so I observed that it was ripe enough for picking, so I plucked it from its bed of leaves and enjoyed showing it off to the delight of anyone who visited my home.

While that pineapple was growing, I imagined one day being able to share it with friends. But the day I sliced it for eating, there was scarcely enough for one person, so I sat down and with a thankful heart to the Lord enjoyed every bite while imagining what Malcom might think if he knew his pineapple plant had finally produced a piece of fruit. It might have been small, but it was sweet!

Now should I decide to grow another pineapple, I think I am much wiser to the techniques of container gardening. In retrospect, I realize we should have increased its pot size each year, which would have allowed the roots sufficient expansion room. Perhaps next time there will be a larger pineapple to eat. I can always hope! After all, the pineapple for me was a symbol of hope for the future. In the months since discovering fruit on that formerly barren plant, God has enriched my life in so many ways and truly allowed me to experience the joy of hope fulfilled.

“But I will hope continually, and will yet praise thee more and more.” Psalm 71:14 (KJV)

New Mercies

2007-08-06T22:03:00.000-04:00

“It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23

The path of Christian growth is a steady process of recognizing that no matter what lessons have been learned along the way thus far, we have not yet “arrived.” Yesterday’s victory doesn’t suffice for today’s challenge. I must daily choose to put on the Christian armor and stand. (Ephesians 6:10-13) Today’s trial does not exempt me from facing one tomorrow. There is no room for complacency or self-congratulatory accolades.

With one phone call I was reminded just how quickly things can change and how very much dependent I must be upon the Lord for what a day will bring. One of our granddaughters was in a car accident that could have had a very serious outcome. (Praise the Lord she is okay and her friend’s injuries are minimal.) Upon hearing the news, my heart was gripped with that familiar feeling of helplessness and loss of control over life’s circumstances. When the prospect of tragedy brushes so close, the heart cries out “No, Lord, please don’t make us go there again!” Then the Holy Spirit gently reminds me that nothing comes into my life but that it has first passed through the hands of a loving God. I praise Him for protecting my loved one. I honor Him for the reminder of my own weakness and the need to daily draw upon His mercies.

Too Many to Count

2007-08-03T16:44:00.000-04:00

“And Solomon left all of the vessels unweighed because they were exceeding many, neither was the weight of the brass found out.” 1 Kings 7:47

Reading through the account of King Solomon directing the building and furnishing of the temple for God, I couldn’t help but marvel at the sheer volume of work and materials involved in the project. Obviously, Solomon was overwhelmed by it too and dispensed with trying to keep count of it all. When the work was finished and the people assembled to worship, it is recorded that they sacrificed sheep and oxen that could not be numbered for multitude! (8:5)

Such an account prompts the question: Is there anything in my life in such abundance that it cannot be weighed or measured? Oh yes! I am blessed beyond measure from above as God pours out innumerable blessings on me. I am recipient of His great and precious promises that are mine without end. His mercies are new every day. His love and forgiveness knows no boundaries. I cannot count the times I have cried out to Him and He has heard me. This one may sound silly, but having just returned safely to Taiwan, I am reminded that in 27 years of air travel back and forth to the mission field and others places in between, I cannot count the times I have arrived safely without so much as a piece of lost luggage!

A second question is more sobering: What have I done for the Lord in such abundance that it cannot be weighed or measured? I want to live my life in such a way that if I were to begin to count my service, my worship, my sacrifice, it could not be numbered for multitude. Perhaps one day this temple of the Holy Spirit will be furnished with innumerable gifts in response to the extravagant love of God. The debt I owe cannot be counted!

Much to do about stuff

2007-07-21T22:22:00.000-04:00

"Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer." Psalm 19:14

The other day I opened my computer as usual only to discover that everything was gone. What a shock! All programs, emails, documents, pictures and files were missing. It was as if somehow during the night the hard drive had been wiped clean. My initial reaction was one of panic. I began to think of all the important data that I had not backed up which now was forever lost. The more I meditated on it, the worse I felt.

At that moment I recognized the familiar feeling of loss for something that could not be changed nor restored. In that instant I realized that I had allowed "stuff" (namely my computer) to hold an important spot in my heart. I had a choice to make. Would I allow myself to be controlled and even devastated by this turn of events, or would I put the loss in it's proper perspective? Things can be replaced. My relationship with God, with my husband, with my children--these are the important things of life. With a contrite heart I turned to the Lord and confessed I had made much to do about stuff.

You know what? None of my circumstances had changed, but the meditation of my heart had turned to thankfulness for the blessings I have and for a loving God who used "stuff" to reboot my attitude.

The Reality of Answered Prayer

2007-07-17T21:05:00.000-04:00

"For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11 (NLT)

I have a framed version of this scripture verse sitting on my piano in Taiwan. I found myself often puzzling over the words wondering how in the world God could give me a future and a hope when it seemed all I had was disaster. The perspective in the valley is so limited. Trusting God's heart, for me. was what I clung to during that time. And now, the reality of answered prayer with a wider view from the mountaintop allows me to see both what God was working out in the past as well as gaining a glimpse of that "future and a hope"!

Last week on July 9, 2007, Jerry Burton and I were married in Frisco, Colorado. Neither one of us would have chosen the life-changing events of the last few years, but now seeing God's hand in our lives all we can do is lift our voices in praise to the Lord who all along was working out His plan.

A Surprise Answer to a Secret Prayer

2007-07-09T14:36:00.000-04:00

“But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly.” Matthew 6:6

There are a great number of Christians who pray for things but never have a clear sense that God heard and answered. What a sad commentary on a life that should be abundant and filled with excitement over the power of prayer and faith in a God who not only hears but answers. One reason for uncertainty is the lack of specific prayer and the habit we have of seeking help from human sources rather than meeting with our Heavenly Father in secret. Years ago at the starting line of my missionary career I was challenged to meet with God in the secret place and petition Him for things that only He could do, then while telling no other person watch God work. Oh how He showed Himself real to me in those days and in the years to follow! It was an exciting lesson learned. The neat thing is that now, 26 years later, God is still in the business of meeting me in secret and rewarding me openly.

Such has been the case in recent months. There are some yearnings of the heart that can only be voiced to God alone, things much too personal to trust to another human. I have come to recognize God as my source of strength, my hiding place, and my great provider. Knowing God in such an intimate way gave me the courage to pray a secret prayer from the heart. I asked God to either make me content to serve Him alone, or bring someone into my life who had a passion for God with whom I could serve. I got real specific and made a long list of character traits and attributes that I would want in a future mate. Honestly, I didn’t think there was a man alive who fit my criteria.

Imagine my surprise when God proved me wrong and answered my secret prayer by bringing Jerry Burton into my life. Jerry, a pastor in Ohio, was widowed 2 years ago. He was Malcom’s friend who was a source of strength and encouragement during his year battle with cancer. He became my friend during that time as well and was one of my encouragers through this past year. When I had at last submitted to God’s perfect way, it was as if God said, “Now…here is the answer to your prayer.” Soon I will be Mrs. Jerry Burton and I am excited to embark on this new phase of life, serving a wonderful God who answers prayers!

Submission

2007-06-22T18:09:00.000-04:00

“Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: Casting all your care upon him; for he cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:6-7

The journey of the past year has not been easy. When God set me on this journey—and surely it has been His choosing, not mine—I often pondered the unanswerable question, “Why?” There never was a satisfactory reply forthcoming. I often said aloud, “God, what are You doing?” I sensed God telling me not to try to understand, just submit beneath His hand and simply trust that a higher purpose would be accomplished. That is a difficult lesson to learn and at times the pain seemed crushing to the point of insufferable. But in that crushing I have begun to find answers to my questions.

Consider the spices that the Lord instructed Moses to have prepared for the sacred anointing oil and incense to be used in the temple worship. In Exodus 30:34-36 the Lord said, “Take sweet spices…and make an incense blended as by the perfumer, seasoned with salt, pure and holy. You shall beat some of it very small, and put part of it before the testimony in the tent of meeting where I shall meet with you.” Perhaps my life is like the spice, which has no value in and of itself until it is crushed. Once the pestle of God is used to crush the spice, then it releases what has been inside all along—the fragrance for which God is longing. Receiving the aroma, He is glorified and He blesses the fragrance through the execution of His perfect will.

Submission is an aroma that pleases God. As I have yielded to God’s choosing, He has responded with gifts, which I might never have known were within me aside from the total surrender to His will. I need not enumerate those gifts here. In whatever form or fashion God wants to use me, I willingly give back to Him and pray my life is a sweet fragrance that testifies of His grace and glory.

Submission

The path that I have trod has brought me nearer God
Though oft it led thru sorrow’s gates
Though not the way I’d choose,
in my way I might lose
The joy that yet for me awaits.

CHORUS
Not what I wish to be, nor where I wish to go
For who am I that I should choose my way
The Lord shall choose for me,
tis better far I know
So let Him bid me go, or stay.

Submission to the will
of Him who guides me still
Is surety of His love revealed
My soul shall rise above
this world in which I move
I conquer only when I yield.

Remembering Sue

2007-06-13T06:55:00.000-04:00

To read some memories about Sue visit http://sueqstories.blogspot.com/
If you want to submit a memory, send it to me and I'll post it.

Greatest Joy

2007-06-12T01:07:00.000-04:00

“Therefore we are always confident, knowing that while we are at home in the body, we are absent from the Lord: (for we walk by faith, not by sight). We are confident, I say, and will rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord.” 2 Corinthians 5:6-8

It is June, that month of the year that reminds me of sad events in life. Today, June 12, is the date three years ago when Susan was ushered out of this world and into the presence of God. Next week June 22 will mark one year since Malcom’s home going. My attitude has been one of intense dislike for this month. Yet, why should I despise it so? It was a glorious month for both Sue and Malcom. They are blessed above us all to be in the presence of the Lord! I'm so glad that Malcom is not suffering the physical pain of cancer nor the emotional pain he carried after that fateful day at the beach. Today the two of them are together only beginning to discover the marvels of heaven.

Would I wish them back now that they are fulfilling the purpose for which they were created? My entire belief system is on the line when I consider these things. Do I believe that death is a passage and not an end? Do I truly believe that to be present with the Lord is more desirable than remaining on earth?

The scripture says we walk by faith and not by sight. No, I would not wish them back to this world of suffering and pain. Yes, I believe death is the door to eternal joy with the Savior. Yes, I believe that to be with the Lord is far better than we can ever imagine.

So today I make the conscious choice to view the month of June as a blessed month. That which in the past has caused my greatest pain will in the future be my greatest joy. “As for God, his way is perfect…” (Psalm 18:30).

He didn't forget

2007-05-21T01:14:00.000-04:00

"The Lord repay you for what you have done, and a full reward be given you by the Lord...under whose wings you have come to take refuge." Ruth 2:12

As a young child I enjoyed having pastors, missionaries, and evangelists autograph my Bible. They were my heroes. One particular signature was very meaningful to me: that of Evangelist Don Brown, who was preaching the revival during which I accepted Christ. He signed with a flourish and added "Ruth 2:12". From that moment on, it was a favorite verse of mine. And yet, as a 10-year old girl, I could not possibly understand the full meaning. Now in my middle adult years, I'm starting to comprehend the awesome power of those words.

In the book of Ruth, we read of Naomi who lost her husband and two sons. According to her view, God had dealt bitterly with her. Her daughter-in-law, Ruth, though mourning her own loss stayed by her side. Perhaps they were able to comfort one another in their grief. But such great, life-changing tragedy did not mean God had forgotten them. He was there all the time and His plan was to bless in a way they could never imagine. Boaz took notice of Ruth, and the rest of the story is that she became an important link in the ancestral line of David through which Christ was born.

I also have felt the bitter pain of loneliness and loss. With sometimes faltering faith, I have run under the refuge of the Lord's wings, praying for strength to make it through another day, another month. Those strong wings have comforted me and God has not forgotten the times I pushed myself to reach out to others in spite of my own weakness. Now, wounds not so fresh and a little more healed, God lifts me gently up and says "Child, I have a plan for you that you never could have imagined." When least expected, God stirred the heart and someone took notice. He didn't forget me. He won't forget you.

How does your Pineapple grow?

2007-05-08T12:30:00.000-04:00

"But grow in grace and in the knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To Him be glory both now and forever. Amen." 2 Peter 3:18

It's been almost 3 months since I discovered that my pineapple plant of 6 years was actually producing fruit. Many people have asked me how it is doing, so I took a picture today. You can see it's doing quite well! It is growing so well I realized the pot it was planted in was not going to be adequate in another month or two. So I purchased a larger pot and had fun transferring it to a bigger spot to grow. I only ended up with a few scratches in the process. (Those leaves are very thorny!)

Adequate soil, water, and sunshine seems to be the magic for growing a pineapple. Thinking on this, my mind was drawn to the book of 2 Peter. Chapter three is packed full of growth principles for Christians:

vs 2 Be mindful of the words spoken before by the holy prophets (study the bible!)
vs 8-9 Be not ignorant of God's promises concerning his coming
vs 11 Be holy in your daily living
vs 17 Beware that you re not led astray by error and fall from your own stedfastness
vs 18 Grow in grace
vs 18 Grow in knowledge of Jesus

How are you growing?

More about Jesus would I know
More of His grace to others show
More of His saving fullness see
More of His love who died for me

More about Jesus let me learn
More of His holy will discern
Spirit of God, my teacher be
Showing the things of Christ to me

More, more about Jesus
More, more about Jesus
More of His saving fullness see
More of His love who died for me

(Hymn: More About Jesus by J.R. Sweney)

Curiosity or Compassion?

2007-03-27T12:15:00.000-04:00

“But when he [Jesus] saw the multitudes, he was moved with compassion on them, because they fainted, and were scattered abroad, as sheep having no shepherd.” Matthew 9:36

As I was driving the 2 hour trip to Kaoshiung the other day, I was once again struck by the beauty of the mountains here in Taiwan. Malcom and I used to make that trip weekly to teach bible college classes. It had now been about two years since I had traveled that highway. However, it wasn’t just the beautiful scenery that drew my attention, but the sight of a large idol—a gold Buddha probably 10 stories tall set in the mountain side, towering over the land. My heart was gripped with sadness as I reflected that such a sight was common in this country, and indeed symbolized the very real stronghold that Satan has on the Taiwanese people.

I am reminded of the first year we lived in Taiwan about 34 years ago. At that time we were here with the US Air Force. While many Americans and other tourists enjoyed visiting the temples to view the architecture and see the worship practices of a different culture, I could never enjoy a moment of it. For once you look upon people through the eyes of Jesus, it is compassion that grips you, not curiosity. Then the dilemma is presented: the harvest is great but the laborers are few (vs. 37).

Taiwan is still a very spiritually needy mission field. But there’s a shortage of laborers and the numbers are fewer than a year ago. I’m praying to the “Lord of the harvest” that someone will move from simply curiosity to true compassion.

I Much Prefer Pleasant

2007-03-22T13:28:00.000-04:00

“The heart of the wise teaches his mouth, and adds learning to his lips. Pleasant words are as a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul, and health to the bones.” Proverbs 16:23-24

Last week I had the opportunity to attend a high school drama production of the classic play by Mary Chase called “Harvey.” It’s a delightful story of a likeable man who has an imaginary 6-foot rabbit friend. One of my favorite lines in the whole play is, “For 45 years I tried smart. I much prefer pleasant!”

Reading in the 16th chapter of Proverbs one discovers that “smart” and “pleasant” have a common denominator—the heart of the wise. Godly wisdom flows from the heart and brings forth pleasant words that are as sweet as honey and edifying to both the hearer and the speaker. There is healing power in words that are sweetness to the soul and health to the bones. Proverbs 26:11 describes a word fitly spoken as “apples of gold in pictures of silver.” Pleasant indeed!

I’ve been the recipient of such words in recent days. Perhaps the one who said, “Thank you for showing me God” didn’t realize how much I needed to hear a word of encouragement that day. It was just the medicine I needed. On another day my sad countenance was lifted by words of hope from someone who has walked a similar path.

It’s a worthy pursuit—to fill our hearts with God’s wisdom, then drawing from that well teach our lips and taste our words before blessing another with “pleasant.”

Lantern Festival

2007-03-04T11:29:00.000-05:00

“In him [Jesus] was life, and the life was the light of men. And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not. That was the true Light which lighteth every man that cometh into the world.” John 1:2-3,9

The fifteenth day of the lunar new year is here and brings with it the festival of lights, commonly called “Lantern Festival.” Children look forward to this day all year for the chance to go out in the evening with a lighted lantern in hand to be dazzled by the pretty lights and the fireworks. Holiday activities often include such things as making paper lanterns, the telling of riddles plus food and games for all.

The origin of the Lantern Festival is rooted in religious worship. It seems the “kitchen god” (who left at the beginning of the new year to report to the higher god of heaven) is now returning. So the devoted followers must go out in the night with lanterns to light his way back. In this pantheistic society there are many who still hold to this pagan belief.

From my 14th floor apartment, I listen to the sounds of the firecrackers and watch the fireworks exploding in the sky. My heart cannot help but long for the “Light of the World” to shine into the hearts of the Taiwanese. Jesus Christ is the living God who does not need us to light His way. Instead He brings the light of life to illuminate our dark souls, giving salvation and hope.

Symbols of Hope

2007-02-19T20:49:00.000-05:00

“And God spake unto Noah, and to his sons with him, saying…I do set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a covenant between me and the earth.” Genesis 9:8,13

I am not one to over spiritualize every natural occurrence in life. I think there is a danger in always looking for a “sign” from God. On the other hand, God does speak to us through the natural phenomena of His creation. After the huge flood that decimated the earth, God placed a rainbow in the sky as a symbol of hope for the future. Even today, thousands of years later, our hearts are lifted in hope at the sight of a rainbow spanning the skies.

A couple of days ago, God gave me a “symbol of hope” in the form of a pineapple plant growing in my patio garden. That pineapple plant has been the object of many conversations, jokes, and illustrations since the day 6 years ago when Malcom lobbed off the top of a pineapple and stuck it in some potted dirt. We read somewhere that it takes about 3 years for a pineapple plant to mature and produce fruit. So day after day, year after year we faithfully tended that plant. In the third year, no fruit, just beautiful leaves. In the fourth year, still no fruit. By now this plant has become the perfect example of how “not” to live the Christian life. God wants us to bear fruit! It was beautiful, but useless.

After Malcom went home to be with the Lord last year and I returned to Taiwan, I seriously contemplated throwing away that plant who had now survived 5 years without producing fruit. It seemed to mock me saying “I’m still here but I’m no use!” Actually, it was the logistics of how to easily dispose of such a huge plant that caused me to procrastinate and allow it to continue growing on my balcony patio.

Ah, but now, that plant has become a symbol of hope to me! On Chinese New Year’s Eve, as I was watering the foliage I detected something a bit different with that plant. Could it be true? Yes! Something besides leaves is beginning to emerge from its center! Six years after it was planted, God says “It’s time!” and there is a bloom.

My pineapple plant is just doing what it is supposed to do and it brings me pleasure. I see hope for the future. I’m glad I didn’t give up and toss it out last fall. It’s a good lesson that can be applied to many areas of my life and ministry. How many other “pineapple plants” are there that just need tending and time for God to work?!

Something to Consider

2007-02-11T16:18:00.000-05:00

“Say not thou, ‘What is the cause that former days were better than these?’ for thou dost not inquire wisely concerning this.” Ecclesiastes 7:10

I have often described life since becoming a widow as “being in limbo.” Where once there was a common goal and plan for the future, now there is uncertainty. Where once all my decisions were weighed equally with my husband’s desires, now I’m left to figure out the best course of action on my own. It’s quite an adjustment. In weak moments I say to the Lord, “What were you thinking? I want my life back! I liked it better before all this happened!” Obviously, I’m not the only one who has longingly looked at former days and wished to be whisked back to that safe, comfortable time when life seemed better. Through the pen of wise Solomon, I hear the Lord say, “It’s not really smart for you to ask about such things!” Reading further, instead He gives me something to consider:

“Consider the work of God: for who can make that straight which he hath made crooked. In the day of prosperity be joyful, but in the day of adversity consider: God also hath set the one over against the other to the end that man should find nothing after him.” (Eccl. 7:13-14)

As I consider these things, I recognize the truth that when God does something, it will not be undone without his express permission. Why? Because He has a profound purpose to all He does. It is not random hit and miss as if I can “catch the blessings” sometimes and “oops! I got hit by that trial” other times. I must consider that He has made one as well as the other. As I totally depend upon His wisdom and trust in His goodness, it is possible then to stop dwelling on what was and what could have been. It is the path to moving forward.

Treasures of the Snow

2007-02-01T00:34:00.000-05:00

“Hast thou entered into the treasures of the snow, or hast thou seen the treasures of the hail?” Job 38:22
“For He saith to the snow, be thou on the earth…” Job 37:6

It’s a winter wonderland outside and my thoughts turn once again in wonder and awe of God the Creator. From the safety of my warm house, I love to watch the gently falling snow as it silently settles a thick blanket of white over every thing. It seems to fall from an endless storehouse. What an amazing way to water the earth in winter time! Beauty blended with practicality from an omnipotent, all-surrounding God. Like Job, I do not fully understand it. I have not entered into the “treasures of the snow.” Even those who have made it their goal to understand the mysteries of the elements cannot control or avoid what God causes to be governed by exact and unchangeable laws of nature. Just as God spoke the world into existence, His voice commands the snow to be on the earth. I marvel at the beauty of the snow, but more than that, I worship the amazing Almighty Creator God. I lift my heart in praise because the same sovereign Lord is in control of all that concerns me.

Treasures in Darkness

2007-01-22T02:14:00.000-05:00

“And I will give you the treasures of darkness, and hidden riches of secret places, that you may know that I, the Lord, which call thee by thy name, am the God of Israel.” Isaiah 45:3

The ice storm of the century hit the Ozarks last week causing downed trees, limbs and power lines. I was without electrical power for more than a week. During this time life consisted of simple survival. Without the benefit of electricity, the daylight hours became precious as I welcomed the dawn each morning and dreaded sunset when once again the darkness closed in.

During this time, I learned some things—like how to start and keep a fire going in the fireplace! I can do more than I thought I could—like split wood. I discovered I can tolerate cooler temperatures. Because of the forced darkness, my refrigerator got a complete cleaning, I had the chance to help neighbors, a chance for more time spent with family without the television. I learned to be more thankful for the modern conveniences we all take for granted and to appreciate simple things like candles, batteries, books.

It seems an unlikely place, but there are treasures in darkness. “The Lord has said that He would dwell in the thick darkness.” (2 Chronicles 6:1) Even though I don't enjoy trials, I must admit that there are things learned in this place that could only be learned in darkness. It is the place of knowing God on a deeper level and coming to a greater understanding of my own strengths and weaknesses. Facing the darkness brings me closer to the Light.

Giving God the pen

2007-01-04T23:37:00.000-05:00

“The Lord of hosts has sworn: As I have planned so shall it be. As I have purposed, so shall it stand.” Isaiah 14:24

It’s a new year. Time to break out a new calendar and begin writing in the appointments and plans for the coming days and months. I must admit that it’s with some apprehension that I even attempt to imagine what this new year will bring. Certainly the past several years have not gone as “I” planned. I used to look forward to a new year with it’s chance to start fresh and try again to accomplish some noble goals. I made my plans and boldly wrote them in pen, only to scratch them out when God’s appointments were made known.

In keeping with these thoughts, I found it amusing that I received an interesting desk calendar for Christmas: it has a crossword puzzle for each day which I will, of course, work out in pencil. I would like to think that I can do the puzzles in pen, but I know myself! There is a chance I will make a mistake. So if I’m that careful with a silly game, how much more careful should I be in planning my life? Even while I grieve for those I have lost, I yearn to have hopes and dreams for brighter days ahead. But I dare not take the pen. No, give me a pencil. I’m giving God the pen.

Home for Christmas

2006-12-27T23:43:00.000-05:00

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion forever.” Psalm 73:26

I have a small wooden wall decoration done up in country style, hand painted with a bit of raffia tied around the wire hanger. It reads “All hearts go home for Christmas”. This reminds me of the common saying “Home is where the heart is”. This year it seems I can’t find “home”. No matter where I am, there is a deep sadness and longing for Malcom, the one who captured my heart 34 years ago. It is the first Christmas without him and my heart is restless for home.

I really should not complain. I was abundantly blessed of the Lord with a wonderful husband for so many years. I have friends and family who love me, demonstrate their love and care in so many ways. By the time this year of 2006 ends, I will have had special times with each of our children and with many of my dear friends. And yet my flesh and my heart fails. I don’t want to be ungrateful. I don’t want to feel sad. I chide myself that Christmas is not about me, but about the Savior. I try to summon up the determination to get past my pain and focus on living life to the full now. But it seems an impossible task. Every day I do my best to look for the blessings in life, to smile and laugh. I have gotten quite good, I think, at doing and saying all the right things. But in the night hours, when the sun has gone down and the quietness settles in, I know that I’m still struggling. I have not succeeded in making myself any less of a “mess” than I felt 6 months ago.

Perhaps God is reminding me that in my own strength I can do nothing. In Psalm 73 the psalmist aptly describes the failure of the flesh and the sovereignty of God. I long for the day when the words of verse 25 can truly be my words, “Whom have I in heaven but You? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides You.” I haven’t quite arrived at that spot yet, but I can join with the psalmist in verse 26. I freely admit my frailty and complete dependence on God. He is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Waiting for a Miracle

2006-12-15T11:17:00.000-05:00

“For mine eyes have seen thy salvation.” Luke 2:30

The Jewish nation was waiting for “Messiah” the promised One to come. They were expecting a miracle. But when He came, it wasn’t as they imagined. They wanted a King, a Deliverer, not a baby born in a stable announced by angels and worshiped by shepherds.

But there was at least one person who had a different perspective. This man’s waiting was done patiently and in full faith. His name was Simeon and we find his story recorded in 10 verses stuck right in the middle of Luke chapter two. Now an old man, Simeon was just and devout. He had waited a long time to see the miracle, the Consolation of Israel. That day as he took the infant Jesus up in his arms he declared, “…mine eyes have seen Thy salvation.” He believed and his faith became sight.

Some today, however, have the wait and see attitude. They want to see, feel, or experience a miracle before they will step out on faith and trust God: in essence demanding to “see” in order to receive faith. By doing so it is not faith at all then, but a fulfilling of some felt need. It was the same in Jesus’ day. In John chapter six we read of those who followed Jesus to see the miracles that he did. But Jesus, who knew the thoughts and intents of their hearts said, “…Ye seek me, not because ye saw the miracles, but because ye did eat of the loaves, and were filled.”

What miracle do you need today? I know for me I keep thinking some day God is going to do something to make life joyful and fulfilling again. If I'm not careful, my attitude could degenerate to the point of just wanting to be filled. The Christmas season seems the perfect time to renew my resolve to be steadfast in trusting the Lord, not demanding to see a miracle, but rather actively waiting in faith for my miracle. It may not be what I imagine, but I will surely rejoice.

“O LORD, be gracious unto us; we have waited for thee: be thou their arm every morning, our salvation also in the time of trouble.” Isaiah 33:2

How good it is...exclamation point!

2006-11-28T10:19:00.000-05:00

“A man has joy by the answer of his mouth, and a word spoken in due season, how good it is!” Proverbs 15:23

In human relationships, spoken words are very important. Often times, actions can be misunderstood. Perhaps someone appears to act angry, but they are really in pain; or someone smiles and looks “happy” but they are in fact embarrassed. True thoughts cannot be communicated by actions alone.

An incident in the early years of our ministry here in Taiwan illustrates my point quite well. I taught a Bible lesson on the love of our Heavenly Father and wanted the children to relate God’s love to their parent’s love. I asked, “How many of you know that your parents love you?” No hands went up. “Don’t your mommy and daddy ever say ‘I love you’?” No hands were raised. Those children did not know they were loved because they had never been told! I took the time then to guide them in recognizing signs of love such as their parent’s care and provision of home, food, clothing, and so on. But what a shame that they had never been graced with the gift of three words: “I love you.”

Today I found a wonderful treasure, a gift that I had not expected to receive. In searching for some computer files saved on disks, I came across one labeled, “Sue’s voice.” I immediately put the CD into the disk drive. It was a phone conversation recorded in May, 2004…two very precious voices to me. I wasn’t home at the time and Malcom on a whim had turned on the digital recorder so that I could hear their conversation later. Before the conversation ended, Sue sang out, “Mom, I love you!” Those were words spoken in due season. One month later she was in heaven.

Many of the gifts that we give are things with no lasting value, just stuff to clutter our homes. Things are nice to have, but how much sweeter to bless our family and friends with the joy which comes from words that edify. While we are at it, let’s also remember to talk to the Lord and express our words of love and adoration. Make sure that today someone knows they are loved. How good it is!