The gift of the scraggy

tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14990613.post-59392622547229367752008-07-07T09:34:00.002-06:002008-07-07T09:34:00.325-06:00The gift of the scraggyYesterday my husband told me he had a present for me. This man I married...he gives me little gifts often. Usually movies, or baked goods, or cans of iced tea, or hairs on the soap. It's completely sweet especially since I gave birth to his babies after hour upon hour of painful labor, which rendered my bottom half into a floppy deflated balloon, and he sorta owes me...right? Each gift is tallied and then I show my appreciation. (No, he doesn't owe me. I'm kidding. I'm not going to fault him for not being talented enough to use a uterus.) Anyway, when my husband told me he had a present for me, I expected some chocolate. I've run out of the lovely <a href="http://www.russellstover.com/jump.jsp?itemID=1036&itemType=PRODUCT&path=1%2C2%2C4%2C15%2C156&iProductID=1036">Russell Stover triple chocolate mousse wafers</a> he gave me on another occasion. I did not expect him to hold me hold me down, lift up my shirt, and rub his summer beard all over my balloonish tummy. (I heard that dejected sigh. Here you thought it was getting good with all the shirt lifting. Well neener neener, you ain't getting free thrills here...buncha perverts.) He called this, "the gift of beard". The gift of beard tickles, unlike the "gift of chocolate." Justin almost got "the gift of wetting my pants" in return. The gift of wet pants isn't as nice as "the gift of hairy soap". Still, I can appreciate the gift of beard. (I'm not talented enough to grow one as Grizzly Adams as his is.) No one has to get you a present, ya know? Did you hear me Justin. I'm out of Russell Stover. OUT! *** Get in your <a href="http://www.absentmindedhousewife.com/2008/07/burlesque-baby.html">Gertie story</a>. I got a prize for the winnah! It's not a paperweight and it's not "the gift of hairy soap".Becky..AMHWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14367710044518218570noreply@blogger.com