Actively Aware

Establish H.R. 3695, the Help Find The Missing Act into Billy's Law in less than Ten Seconds with these Simple Steps

2009-10-17T10:22:00.000-04:00

TO IMPLEMENT H.R. 3695, THE HELP FIND THE MISSING ACT INTO BILLY'S LAW, Simply Cut/Paste the Following Letter and send out to your Federal Congressperson:

"10 Seconds" to accomplish Steps:
Simply remove the X's and replace with your information.
Next click on Write Your Representative
(This service will assist you by identifying your Congressperson in the U.S. House of Representatives and providing contact information.)

October XX, 2009

TO: Congressmen XXXX

FROM: Name – Address – City/St/zip

RE: H.R. 3695, The Help Find the Missing Act (Billy's Law)

Dear Congressmen XXXXX:

Thank you, in advance for reviewing my letter and the information below. As a Representative of our district, I am hoping that you will support H.R. 3695. This is very important to me and as a member of our community I believe this is important to all, and hopefully to you as well.

It is no longer a rare occasion in which one may become a missing statistic, rather it happens more often than we would like. The growing number of citizens with Alzheimer's and other cognitive disabilities also has shown a tremendous increase in missing loved ones, which also includes those with other cognitive disorders such as autism.

Your support, and those of your colleagues, are desperately needed. We feel if we do not gain support the bill will just die off. This bill is very necessary. We only want to have the gaps closed that will enable families of missing to have one source to be able to search for their loved ones.

Some recent published examples are:

* 200 unidentified bodies,in Florida, right now from 60's and 70's lying in wait in county morgues, unidentified. http://micurl.com/lyewu

* In Los Angeles, there are 4815 unclaimed. http://coroner.co.la.ca.us/htm/ucplist.cfm

Every year tens of thousands of Americans go missing, never to be seen by their loved ones again. Additionally, there are also an estimated 40,000 sets of unidentified human remains that are being held or disposed of across the country. Sadly, because of gaps in the nation’s missing persons systems, missing persons and unidentified remains are rarely matched. The Help Find the Missing Act (Billy’s Law) is an effort to fix these gaps. We want to help families to have the resources so that we can lessen the burden on the system as well as bringing loved ones home for a proper burial.

Please review the below and help by supporting H.R. 3695

Filling in the Gaps of the Nation’s Missing Persons Systems

Endorsed By: Connecticut Department of Public Safety, National Forensic Science Technology Center, National Center for Forensic Science, Doe Missing Persons Network, Center for Hope, Families of Homicide Victims and Missing Persons, Inc.

Sponsored by Representatives Chris Murphy (D-CT) and Ted Poe (R-TX)

This legislation is named after Billy Smolinski of Waterbury, Connecticut who went missing on August 24, 2004 at the age of 31. Billy’s family knows all-too-well the systemic challenges in trying to find the missing. They quickly learned that while federal law mandates law enforcement report missing children, there are no such requirements for adults – or unidentified bodies. Compounding this problem is the fact that local law enforcement agencies, medical examiners, and coroners, often don’t have the resources or training to voluntarily report these cases. Finally, even when missing adults and remains are reported, the wide-range of unconnected federal, state, local, and non-profit databases to help match the missing with unidentified bodies, makes finding a match an often insurmountable challenge.

Billy’s Law builds upon recent efforts to address these issues by:

* Authorizing, and therefore helping to ensure funding for, the National Missing Persons and Unidentified Persons System (NamUs), which was created in July 2007 by the Department of Justice (DOJ) to provide a missing persons/unidentified database that the public could access and contribute;

* Connecting NamUs with the FBI’s National Crime Information Center (NCIC) in order to create more comprehensive missing persons and unidentified remains databases and streamlining the reporting process for local law enforcement;

* Creating an incentive grants program to help states, local law enforcement and medical examiners/coroners report missing persons and unidentified remains to NCIC, NamUs, and the National DNA Index System (NDIS);

* Calling on the DOJ to issue guidelines and best practices on handling missing persons and unidentified remains cases in order to empower law enforcement, medical examiners and coroners to help find the missing.

In closing, I thank you again for your review and hopeful support. Should you have any questions or needs, I am sure that Representative Chris Murphy (D-CT) and Ted Poe (R-TX) would be honored to respond to your inquiries.

Respectfully,

XXName

XXAddress

XXCity/State/Zip

XXPhone Number

As fall approaches, seasonal affective disorder may be one issue to look out for

2009-10-12T21:35:00.000-04:00

October 10th, 2009

Mental Illness Awareness Week and What You Should Know About Seasonal Affective Disorder

Today marks the last day of Mental Illness Awareness Week, first recognized by Congress in 1990. The first week of October has since been used to raise awareness about mental health issues. As fall approaches, seasonal affective disorder may be one issue to look out for.

Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is a common mood disorder that occurs in autumn and winter. The reduced sunlight during these months causes the body to fall out of its natural rhythm. People with the disorder may feel drained, depressed, or lack interest in normal activity, among other symptoms.

Not to worry, though. These five tips may help you lose those winter blues:

Exercise regularly. Just 30 minutes of exercise is enough to flood the brain with endorphins, the body’s natural feel-good hormones.

Eat a balanced diet. Cutting out excess carbohydrates and saturated fats and replacing them with healthier foods can boost your metabolism and give you more energy.

Get plenty of sunlight. Most physicians recommend getting at least 30 minutes of sunlight to boost brain chemistry. If sunlight is scarce, you might consider a form of light therapy.

Consult your physician. There are lots of health conditions with similar symptoms as sad. SAD can be mistaken as hypothyroidism, mononucleosis, or another mental disorder.

Consider medication. For more severe cases of SAD, medication may be needed to balance the brain’s chemical levels. Talk to your doctor about different medications and other treatment options.

According to the National Alliance of Mental Illness (NAMI), as many as 26 percent of adults and 10 percent of children living in the U.S. are directly affected by a mental health disorder every year. Mental illness affects everyone, but it doesn’t have to wreak havoc on your life. Taking extra steps toward positive mental health can keep a smile on your face this season.

Get more information about symptoms of seasonal affective disorder (SAD), or find resources on how to make Mental Illness Awareness Week recognized in your community.

Start Writing That Book Inside You

2009-10-10T11:07:00.001-04:00

How to Stop Procrastinating & Start Writing That Book Inside You

Posted by Wendy Aron on April 2nd, 2009

Image courtesy of BingBing

Whenever I tell a new person I’ve met that I’ve recently had a memoir published, the response is, invariably, “You wouldn’t believe my story. I should write a book, too.” And my response to them is, invariably, “Then, why don’t you?”

The gap between having the desire to write a book and actually sitting down to write one is quite large, but with some effort, it can be bridged.

Getting Started

The first thing you need to ask yourself is what is actually stopping you from sitting down at the computer. Most people procrastinate because of fear of failure. If you never do anything then no one can say that you did it poorly. Most procrastinators are their own worst critics. Putting off doing something that they have always wanted to do is their way of avoiding their own perfectionism and convincing themselves that they could have excelled if only they had the (fill in the blank) to write.

When it comes to writing, the first thing you have to do to stop procrastinating is to challenge the assumption that what you write needs to be perfect. Even bestselling and award-winning authors are never satisfied with the first drafts of their manuscripts. A professional author can write multiple versions of his or her book before ever letting anyone read it. The best way to approach this is to just sit down and spit out whatever comes into your mind. There’s time for analyzing and revising later, and you can do it as much as you want before ever sending your baby out to be critiqued. The important thing is to just get your ideas down on paper or on the screen.

If you’ve decided to write fiction, chances are you’ll need to do some research, and you can motivate yourself to begin the project by going to the library to do some investigation. There’s nothing like learning about a new world for stimulating the imagination. Make the project fun by going to the library with a friend or family member who is also doing research for their own undertaking. And share what you have learned with others who can give you ideas and suggestions for making your work stronger and more appealing.

Another helpful approach is to break your manuscript down into manageable chunks, rather than putting yourself under pressure to write an entire book. Divide your manuscript into chapters and set yourself short term goals for completing them. Writing a book becomes much less daunting when you approach it incrementally. Perhaps you can start by writing an outline or basic synopsis of your plot. That way, you’ll have a road map to guide you as you write.

Finding the Time To Write

Many people say they can’t write their manuscript because they have other obligations and just can’t find the time. I remember reading once that when John Grisham wrote his first novel, A Time to Kill, he was still working as a lawyer and wrote one page a night for a year until he had finished his book. The point is, if you really want to write, you can find the time. If you’ve got a family, you can talk to them about giving you a certain period each day when you cannot be disturbed. A supportive family will understand.

Many people also believe that they need the optimal conditions in which to work, and that absent these conditions, they just can’t produce. This is another faulty assumption. No less an author than the late Pulitzer-Prize winning John Kennedy Toole wrote his book, A Confederacy of Dunces, in his bedroom in longhand on a legal pad. You do not have to be in the perfect surroundings to write a book. And if you do have a favorite place to write, there’s no reason you can’t make yourself as comfortable as possible by arranging your workspace to please yourself.

Final Thoughts on Writing a Book

Don’t get me wrong; writing a book is no easy proposition. In fact, I once read on a publishing Web site that for every thousand people who aspire to write a book, one of them actually does it. But just think how great you’ll feel about yourself once you have a completed manuscript. You can be that one person, so start writing now!

Coaching Boys Into Men campaign

2009-10-08T21:59:00.002-04:00

Safe Nest, in partnership with the Family Violence Prevention Fund, is proud to announce the launch of a ground-breaking campaign to engage men as partners in preventing violence against women.

Safe Nest invites men in Southern Nevada to do their part to end violence against women through the Coaching Boys Into Men campaign. The message of the campaign is simple: Men can teach boys that violence does not equal strength.

The Challenge

How can men help prevent violence?

Research has shown that men are ready and willing to become partners in the movement to end violence against women:

21 percent of men say they don't actively support efforts to stop domestic violence because "no one asked me to get involved."
A majority of men are willing to talk to children about the importance of healthy, violence-free relationships.
Men respond extremely well to the notion that they are in a unique position as role models and can help steer boys and teens away from abusive behavior.

The Challenge to Men — Be Our Children's Role Models

The Coaching Boys Into Men campaign appeals to men as fathers, friends, mentors, coaches, and community leaders and encourages them to talk with the boys in their lives about why violence has no place in relationships. The goals of the campaign are to:

Invite men to be part of the solution while educating them about the problem.
Motivate them to see their role as leaders and to act on it; and
Provide them with the tools and information necessary to break the cycle of violence.

Reaching the Public

The Coaching Boys into Men campaign includes television, radio and print media. Television and radio spots titled "Father and Son", feature vignettes of a father and son playing different sports together. The narrator states, "You taught him how to hit the strike zone, a 9-iron, the net, the open man, but how much time have you spent teaching him what not to hit?" The narrator continues, “All violence against women is wrong. Teach early." These moving public service announcements were developed by the Family Violence Prevention Fund and the Ad Council.
Look for the Coaching Boys Into Men public service announcements on local television and radio stations! For more information, contact Safe Nest at 702-877-0133, ext. 225.

Men - What you Can Do

The boys in your life need your time and energy. Your son, grandson, nephew, younger brother. The boys you teach, coach and mentor. All need you to help them grow into healthy young men.
Boys are swamped with influences outside of the home – from friends, the neighborhood, television, the internet, music, the movies… everything they see around them. They hear all kinds of messages about what it means to "be a man" – that they have to be tough and in control. There are numerous conflicting and some harmful messages being given to boys about what constitutes "being a man" in a relationship.
Boys need your advice on how to behave toward girls. Boys are watching how you and other men relate to women to figure out their own stance towards girls. So teach boys early, and teach them often, that there is no place for violence in a relationship.

Here's How:

Teach Early. It's never too soon to talk to a child about violence. Let him know how you think he should express his anger and frustration – and what is out of bounds. Talk with him about what it means to be fair, share and treat others with respect.

Be there. If it comes down to one thing you can do, this is it. Just being with boys is crucial. The time doesn't have to be spent in activities. Boys will probably not say this directly -- but they want a male presence around them, even if few words are exchanged.

Listen. Hear what he has to say. Listen to how he and his friends talk about girls. Ask him if he's ever seen abusive behavior in his friends. Is he worried about any of his friends who are being hurt in their relationships? Are any of his friends hurting anyone else?

Tell Him How. Teach him ways to express his anger without using violence. When he gets mad, tell him he can walk it out, talk it out, or take a time out. Let him know he can always come to you if he feels like things are getting out of hand. Try to give him examples of what you might say or do in situations that could turn violent.

Bring it up. A kid will never approach you and ask for guidance on how to treat women. But that doesn't mean he doesn't need it. Try watching TV with him or listening to his music. If you see or hear things that depict violence against women, tell him what you think about it. Never hesitate to let him know you don't approve of sports figures that demean women, or jokes, video games and song lyrics that do the same. And when it comes time for dating, be sure he knows that treating girls with respect is important.

Be a Role Model. Fathers, coaches and any man who spends time with boys or teens will have the greatest impact when they "walk the walk." They will learn what respect means by observing how you treat other people. So make respect a permanent way of dealing with people – when you're driving in traffic, talking with customer service reps, in restaurants with waiters, and with your family around the dinner table. He's watching what you say and do and takes his cues from you, both good and bad. Be aware of how you express your anger. Let him know how you define a healthy relationship and always treat women and girls in a way that your son can admire.

Teach Often. Your job isn't done once you get the first talk out of the way. Help him work through problems in relationships as they arise. Let him know he can come back and talk to you again anytime. Use every opportunity to reinforce the message that violence has no place in a relationship.
Courtesy of the Family Violence Prevention Fund

A List of Free Webinars for Nonprofits - October 2009

2009-10-08T11:04:00.001-04:00

23 Free Webinars for Nonprofits - October 2009

Wake Up Your Nonprofit Brand! How to Distinguish Your Organization and Reach Donors in a Down Economy
Free webinar hosted by Howard Levy, Red Rooster Group, includes examples of branding campaigns, hands-on activities to clarify your organization’s brand, and a chance to “Ask the Expert” your branding questions (60 minutes).
Date: Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Time: 12:00 noon Eastern
Register

Causes on Facebook: Partner Center, Application Redesign and America’s Giving Challenge, Oh My!
Free teleconference with Matthew Mahan, the Director of Nonprofit Relations and Business Development at Causes, the largest application on Facebook.
Date: Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

How Idealist supports nonprofit professionals
Free webinar introducing several resource centers at Idealist.org (30 minutes).
Date: Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

VolunteerMatch 101
Free introductory webinar for nonprofits new to VolunteerMatch.org (60 minutes).
Date: Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Time: 11:00 a.m. Pacific
Register

Risk Management Webinar: The Volunteer Protection Act
Free webinar sponsored by the Nonprofit Risk Management Center (90 minutes).
Date: Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Central
Register

YouTube for Nonprofits
Free webinar presented by see3 communications on getting the most out of your online videos (60 minutes).
Date: Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Accounting For Change: Implementing FAS 117-1 For Endowment Fund Management and Addressing the Reporting and Auditing Challenges Facing 403(b) Plans
Free basic webinar by Clifton Gunderson LLP is aimed at US nonprofits (60 minutes).
Date: Thursday, October 8, 2009 (two sessions)
Time: 10:00 a.m. & 2:00 p.m. Central
Register

Gear Up for Giving: Recruiting, Fundraising and Running Effective Campaigns on Causes
Free webinar with Sarah Koch, Causes Nonprofit Coordinator, with best practices, tips, and success stories about how to get more people to join your cause and use those supporters to run effective fundraising campaigns (60 minutes).
Date: Thursday, October 8, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Get to Know Your Online Activists
Free webinar uses the case study of the NY League of Conservation Voters to explore the value of building a relationship with your online activists (60 minutes).
Date: Thursday, October 8, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Central
Register

Welcome to Idealist’s social media tools
Free webinar introducing new social media features on Idealist.org, including blog, podcasts, discussion forums, video, Idealist Groups, and more (30 minutes).
Date: Monday, October 12, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Proposal Writing Basics
Free webinar teaches the basics of writing a proposal for your nonprofit organization (60 minutes).
Date: Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Time: 2:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Strategies for Diversifying Revenue Sources
Free webcast workshop, part of a series presented by Talisman Associates and National Safe Place, will share best practices on how to expand your fundraising using the human and financial resource you have (60 minutes).
Date: Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Time: 2:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Best Practices for Recruiting Online
Free webinar covering the eight simple things you can do to help your opportunities stand out on VolunteerMatch.org (60 minutes).
Date: Thursday, October 15, 2009
Time: 11:00 a.m. Pacific
Register

Email Messaging: Best Practices for Reaching and Engaging your Audience
Free webinar with Eric Rardin from Care2, who takes you through simple techniques for composing compelling, engaging email messages with high open rates (60 minutes).
Date: Thursday, October 15, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Central
Register

Skilled Volunteers: How to Maximize their Potential
Free webinar for nonprofits just beginning to add skilled volunteers to their program, or thinking about doing so; hosted by VolunteerMatch.org (60 minutes).
Date: Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Time: 11:00 a.m. Pacific
Register

“Missionize” Your Year-End Fundraising: Maximizing Your Organization’s Fundraising Potential this Holiday Season
Free introductory teleconference with Terry Axelrod, founder and CEO of Benevon®, which trains and coaches nonprofit organizations to implement a mission-based system for raising sustainable funding from individual donors.
Date: Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Fundraising House Party Basics: From Planning to Asking
Free webinar with Andy Robinson, nonprofit consultant, explains how you can organize a fundraising house party event in one to six weeks (60 minutes).
Date: Thursday, October 22, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Central
Register

How Idealist supports individuals: job seekers, volunteers, prospective grad students, and service corps members
Free webinar introducing the the Nonprofit Human Resources Center, The Volunteer Manager Resource Center, and Nonprofit FAQ at Idealist.org (30 minutes).
Date: Thursday, October 22, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Before You Seek a Grant: A Checklist for New Nonprofits
Free webinar will provide you with a step-by-step checklist approach to help increase your organization’s readiness for foundation fundraising (60 minutes).
Date: Thursday, October 22, 2009
Time: 3:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Annual Giving for Nonprofits
Free webcast workshop, part of a series presented by Talisman Associates and National Safe Place, presents how to find, cultivate, solicit and upgrade your annual donors (60 minutes).
Date: Tuesday, October 27
Time: 2:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Grantseeking Basics
Free webinar provides an overview of the funding research process for those seeking grants from foundations, corporations, and grantmaking public charities (60 minutes).
Date: Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Time: 3:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

How Idealist supports nonprofit professionals
Free webinar introducing several resource centers: Idealist.org (30 minutes).
Date: Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Introduction to Fundraising Planning
Free webinar provides an overview of the process of strategically thinking through the components of a fundraising plan (60 minutes).
Date: Friday, October 30, 2009
Time: 1:00 p.m. Eastern
Register

Please join us at Peace4 the Missing
Missing Persons Awareness and Support Network
http://peace4missing.ning.com

Give a Day. Get a Disney Day.

2009-10-07T15:32:00.001-04:00

GIVE A DAY

GET A DISNEY DAY!

BEGINNING JANUARY 1, 2010, when you sign up here to volunteer a day of service with a participating organization (and your service is completed and verified) you'll get one day admission to a Walt Disney World® or Disneyland® theme park, FREE! We want to inspire one million people to volunteer a day of service.

See complete Program Terms & Conditions and FAQs.

Give a Day. Get a Disney Day.

Please join us at Peace4 the Missing
Missing Persons Awareness and Support Network
http://peace4missing.ning.com

When adults go missing

2009-10-05T23:25:00.003-04:00

When adults go missing

Police search, but wouldn't be able to force them to return home.

By TED CZECH
Daily Record/Sunday News

Updated: 10/03/2009 10:17:03 PM EDT

Thisphoto, taken at a York County convenience store in July, shows JamesEdwin Blymire Jr. Blymire has been missing since early July from hisRed Lion home. Anyone with information may call police at 741-1259.

James Edwin Blymire Jr. went missing in early July, abruptly walking out of the home he shared with his brother in Red Lion following an argument, police said.

Barb Blymire, one of James Blymire's sisters, said her brother suffers from congenital brain damage and can easily be coerced into doing things.

"How's he getting food? I wonder if he's eating, or if he's even breathing," she said. James Blymire's siblings haven't seen him since he left his home, but his image has been captured by several York County convenience store surveillance cameras, according to York Area Regional Police.

York Area Regional Detective Don Hopple has logged numerous hours in his search for the 48-year-old Blymire, talking with family members, former roommates, and even the person who cut his hair. Twice, Hopple's been about a day behind Blymire, he said.

If Hopple finds Blymire, the most he can do is tell him that his family is worried about him and that he might want to give them a call.

"If he says, 'I don't want to go home,' then that's where it ends," Hopple said.

That's because despite any mental deficiencies Blymire may have, he is an adult and is therefore entitled to choose where and with whom he stays.

"We can't force somebody to make contact with their family if they've decided for reasons best known to them that they don't want to contact them," Northern York County Regional Deputy Chief Mark Bentzel said.

Todd Matthews, U.S. media director for the Doe Network,an international volunteer organization for unidentified and missing persons, said that as an adult, "You have a legal right to go missing (but) it's not morally right."

According to the FBI's National Crime Information Center, as of Aug. 31, there were nearly 100,000 missing persons, adults and children, in their record; 551 of them are missing from Pennsylvania.
In the past few months, there have been several missing adults on whom police issued news releases; mental illness, drug abuse, or a combination of both appeared to have played a role in all of the disappearances. All have returned home, except for Blymire.

Voluntary vanishing
According to Bentzel, "The first thing you have to do is evaluate if there's any threat or harm or risk to the person, either by their own hand or someone else's."

If the suspected reason a person is missing falls into one of several criteria, then they are entered into the NCIC, Bentzel said.

The criteria include if they are a harm to themselves or a harm to others; if they have a disability -- physical or mental; if they have had an involuntary disappearance; if they are endangered -- physical safety, illness, medication; or a catastrophe has occurred. A person over 18 not meeting the other criteria, but whose safety is a concern, also would be entered into the NCIC.

And even though the missing person may be an adult and can choose to go missing, police still put forth an effort to find them, York City Police Commissioner Mark Whitman said.

"First of all, anytime a missing person is reported, it's nothing that can be taken lightly," he said. "There's quite a bit to it. It's not, let me take a report and see what happens. Once you start that report, then it gets into a regular investigation. It's not something that you're going to blow off."

Police have a number of techniques at their disposal to locate missing persons, most of which they do not want to disclose.

"Each set of circumstances is going to dictate the method and what you're going to need to do," Whitman said.

Still searching
Hopple started his search for James Blymire with the missing man's family, getting a feel for who he was looking for. They gave him a photo, taken about a year before, but it was inaccurate -- the 6 feet, 2 inch Blymire was now rail-thin at about 150 pounds, when a year before, he had weighed about 100 pounds more.

Knowing what convenience stores Blymire frequented, Hopple was able to get surveillance tapes from the stores and soon found footage of Blymire.

He soon discovered another difference in Blymire's appearance: his bushy salt-and-pepper hair was now close-cropped. Hopple was able to determine it happened between July 3 and 4, soon after Blymire had left his home.

In addition, Hopple found out Blymire stopped using a bank card to an account he shared with one of his sisters on July 18. Without the use of the card, it is difficult to track Blymire, Hopple said.

Blymire's family thought he may have been kidnapped by a group of people living in York, but the footage showed Blymire "at different dates and times coming and going under his own power," he said.

Hopple interviewed a number of York residents -- including some that had seen him on Aug. 18. From that point, though, the trail has gone cold, with no sightings of Blymire, Hopple said.
Barb Blymire knows this, but said recently, "I've just got to keep thinking positive and moving forward."
tczech@ydr.com; 771-2033.

SEEN HIM?

James Edwin Blymire Jr., 48, was reported missing July 9, according to York Area Regional Police. He was last seen at his residence on July 2.

He is described as a white male, 6-feet, 2-inches tall, about 150 pounds (he has lost a lot of weight) and has a tattoo of "Jim" on his left arm.

Anyone with information may call police at 741-1259.

RECENT LOCAL MISSING PERSONS

Tina Hunter of York said husband Donald Hunter, who has bipolar disorder, went missing in late August.

"He left his wallet, his keys -- just walked out of the house," she said.

On Sept. 16, Donald Hunter contacted his brother in Harrisburg, ending his disappearance, Tina Hunter said.

A Dover area man was reported missing Sept. 14 in Adams County but was found five days later, according to Pennsylvania State Police in Gettysburg.

Jeffrey Glen Thomas, 51, had been last seen leaving a home in the first block of Barts Church Road in Union Township. Police did not provide information on why he left.

A Manchester man was reported missing in July by his wife. She described him as a recovering drug addict, who had endured several relapses during his addiction, and feared he might have experienced another.

He returned home less than week later. He declined to be interviewed for this story.

OTHER NOTABLE MISSING PERSON

Ray Frank Gricar, 63, is white, 6 feet, 170 pounds, green eyes, brown and gray hair. For almost 20 years, Gricar served as the District Attorney for Center County. On April 16, 2005, Gricar's red and white Mini Cooper was found in a parking lot in Lewisburg, near the Susquehanna River, but Gricar was not found. Gricar may also use the names "Ray Lange" or "Ray Gray." He was last seen wearing a blue fleece jacket, jeans, and tennis shoes.

Jason Knapp, who at one time lived in York County, has been missing since April 12, 1998. The then-20-year-old Clemson University sophomore's car was found shortly after his disappearance at Table Rock State Park in Pickens County, S.C., which is about 30 miles from the school.

FINDING SOMEONE

How can people improve the chances that their loved one will be found? Law enforcement agencies need as much information as possible when trying to solve cases.

Contact information for the missing person's dentist so dental records can be obtained.

Fingerprints (Did the missing person ever get a background check with fingerprints?).

DNA samples. For example: a personal item that will provide DNA (hairbrush, toothbrush, etc.) or DNA samples from family members that can be submitted for DNA analysis.

Good, clear photos of the missing person.

Source: www.findthemissing.org, the Web site for the National Missing and Unidentified Persons System.

October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month

2009-10-03T15:49:00.001-04:00

Please join us at Peace4 the Missing

Missing Persons and Targets of Abuse Awareness and Support Network

Christian Slater's Reflections on ABC's The Forgotten

2009-09-29T23:11:00.000-04:00

Spend 5 minutes with the forgotten’s Christian Slater

Jerry Bruckheimer’s latest procedural drama is ABC’s gritty new series the forgotten. Starring Christian Slater as the head of a group of civilians who try to solve missing person’s cases, the show deals with a different story of the week – think Cold Case mixed with Without a Trace, with a lot of personal drama baked in.

I had a chance to spend a few minutes chatting with Christian Slater about the show, what drew him to it, and why he thinks people should spend some time checking it out!

I’m very interested in what drew you to this particular character?
Well, there were many elements, but I like the character a lot. Alex Donovan, a former Chicago police detective. He’s a real human being. I think he’s a bit of a gritty character. His daughter was kidnapped 2 years ago when she was 8 years old, and that kind of sent him over the edge. As a result of that, his former partner starts to give him these John and Jane Doe cases to work on and investigate and fill the void that he has within himself. What he discovers along the way is that he has the opportunity to give closure to some other people. Closure that he hasn’t been able to get himself yet.

As the episodes go along, will we get more of a history of the characters, see their back story?
Oh yeah! Absolutely – as the stories unfold, what’s great, for me, this really isn’t a “me” show, it’s a “we” show. It’s really a team of people. Alex doesn’t put this team together. It’s comprised of a telephone repairman, a high school teacher, a former medical student, and an office worker. They’re regular people like you and me, who have lives themselves, and jobs that they have to go to. As the show unfolds, we begin to discover why they’re doing what it is that they’re doing as well.

In a few words, what’s the description of the show you’ve been giving people?
The quickest way, I think it’s about humans being willing to help other humans. That’s the quickest way. That’s the shortest possible answer I could give. It really is about humanity. We’re not cops. We run up against brick walls all the time. We don’t always bump into the nicest people, or the most willing people. It’s a show about America, about willingness, about human nature, and about moral character.

Is there a chance as the series goes, that the case won’t always be solved, or is there an understood idea that the team will be successful each week?
The hope of course is that we are successful. I don’t necessarily know if that will be the case. I think that’ll come down to the writers. Really, if you look at it, the truth of the matter is that Alex Donovan hasn’t been successful. He hasn’t been able to find his own daughter. He’s already coming from a point of feeling unfulfilled in that regard, doing what he can to fill the void within himself in some possible way. It’s not like all the answers are nicely wrapped up into a tight little bow every week, and it certainly hasn’t been for Alex, and that’s why he kind of went over the edge for a little while.

Tonight’s episode deals with a missing fiancee, and the only thing to go off of is an engagement ring. Talk a little bit more about that!
A lot of the things I talked about, we definitely hit some brick walls in this episode. Walter’s character makes some efforts, and they don’t go exactly the way he would like them to go. But he’s a persistent guy, he doesn’t give up. I can tell you that Lindsay gets into some serious trouble, and needs to get bailed out.

An all new episode of ABC’s the forgotten airs tonight after DANCING WITH THE STARS.

Please join us at Peace4 the Missing
Missing Persons Awareness and Support Network
http://peace4missing.ning.com

For All Family Members and Friends of Missing Persons

2009-09-29T13:41:00.006-04:00

Therapeutic Support for Families of the Missing
Tonight on BlogTalkRadio with Duanne Bowers, LPC

Time: September 29, 2009 from 9pm to 10pm EST
Location: Your Computer/Online
Website or Map: http://www.blogtalkradio.co...
Phone: Call-in Number: (646) 478-0982

Tonight's Online Interactive Radio Show with Kim Kolton and Dennis Griffin will be featuring special guest, Duane T. Bowers. Duane is a Traumatic Loss Therapist and Educator in private practice, and author of Guiding Your Family Through Loss and Grief, and A Child is Missing: Providing Support for Families of Missing Children. As a therapist Duane's specialty is working with survivors of traumatic death and suicide, which includes assisting families who must identify loved ones at the DC Office of the Chief Medical Examiner, through the Wendt Center for Loss and Healing. He also provides support to families of abducted, missing, exploited and murdered children through the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (NCMEC). Duane serves as a training consultant to NCMEC, and is deployed by them to provide crisis intervention at Amber Alert sites with Team Adam. He also serves as a consultant and trainer for Team HOPE, a telephone support line for parents of missing children, and has provided services to AMECO (Association of Missing and Exploited Children Organizations).

Five States Represented in Saturdays Missing Person Search for Mary Denise Lands

2009-09-25T11:01:00.005-04:00

Missing Person Search for Mary Denise Lands in Marshall, MI on Saturday, September 26th

Michigan:

K-9 One Search and Rescue

Kent County Search and Rescue

Peace4 The Missing

Team Hope

*TrackMissing (Search Organization Organizer/Leader)

Sheridan Township Fire Department (Command Center)

Marshall Moose Lodge (meeting location for Marshall)

The Hampton Inn in Marshall (Rooms for search personnel)

Families who have their own missing loved one

Many local area volunteers and media organizations

Indiana:

Indiana K9 Search and Recovery

Pennsylvania:

David Lohr, Investigation Discovery

Wisconsin:

Karren Kraemer The Broken Wings Network

New York:

The Doe Network

David Lohr of Investigation Discovery to Join Search for Mary Denise Lands

2009-09-25T10:32:00.001-04:00

David Lohr to Join Search for Mary Denise Lands

September 22, 2009

David Lohr will be joining several search and recovery groups, including Track Missing and Destiny Search Services, in Marshall, Michigan this coming weekend to help search for Mary Denise Lands.

Mary is a 39-year-old resident of Marshall who mysteriously disappeared on March 12, 2004.

The organized search will be held on Sept. 26, 2009. For more information, please visit: trackmissing.org.

Please join us at Peace4 the Missing
Missing Persons Awareness and Support Network
http://peace4missing.ning.com

Volunteer Your Time for the Sept. 26th Mary Lands Search in Albion/Marshall, MI

2009-09-09T14:19:00.005-04:00

TrackMissing conducted a 3rd search for Mary Lands on Labor Day Weekend, 2009 that lasted more than 17 hours in the Albion and Marshall areas. Search efforts included dogs, handlers and spotters from Indiana K9 Search and Recovery based in Indianapolis, IN. Personnel from TrackMissing, Peace4 the Missing and Mary Lands Father, Clifford Marshall were also involved in the search efforts.

We will now be conducting thorough grid searches of some areas discovered then during the upcoming scheduled search on Sept. 26, 2009. Our hopes of finding information that will lead to recovering the remains of Mary are now at an all time high.

Mary's Parents and I are very grateful to Indiana K9 Search and Recovery for spending their Holiday weekend searching for Mary Lands and we look forward to working with them, as well as many as 8 additional cadaver dogs and handlers from Indiana on the 26th. It is very likely that additional dogs and handlers from different organizations will be joining this large search effort.

As a result of the Labor Day weekend search efforts we need to reach out to search professionals and the public to contact us at www.trackmissing.org to volunteer your time for the Sept. 26th search. This search may likely be the best chance ever to locate Mary's remains and we do need peoples help if that is going to happen.

In conclusion, all of this weekends search personnel are VERY much looking forward to the 26th and hopefully answering the ultimate questions.....where is Mary? We also want to thank Marshall Police for their continued support of our search efforts and their help over the weekend. Sgt. McDonald has done a great job since taking over the case and he is thanked very much by many people.

Anyone with information on Mary's whereabouts is asked to contact one of the proper people involved in her case. The time for fear has long passed and the time to come forward is now.

Chad Scott
Co-Founder
TrackMissing
www.trackmissing.org

Please Join us at Peace4 the Missing

Missing Persons and Targets of Abuse Awareness and Support Network

Her girls thought Jaycee was their sister

2009-09-03T13:48:00.002-04:00

Girls Find Out Jaycee Dugard Is Really Their Mom

By Howard Breuer

Originally posted Tuesday September 01, 2009 04:10 PM EDT

Jaycee Dugard (before her abduction) and Phillip GarridoPhoto by: Nick Ut / AP; El Dorado County Sheriffs Office / Reuters / AP

It would seem like more than two girls could bear: The man they called "daddy" turns out to be a registered sex offender thrown in jail, and now they've been told the woman they thought was their big sister is really their mother.

This is what Angel, 11, and Starlit, 15, have faced since the arrest last week of Phillip Garrido, charged with the 1991 abduction of Jaycee Dugard, now 29.

"They thought Jaycee was their sister," Dugard's stepfather, Carl Probyn, tells PEOPLE. "People have to realize this will take years of therapy."

Still, there have been encouraging signs the healing has begun. Dugard's reunion with her mother, Terry Probyn, has been "the happiest time of her life, and they are bonding," says Carl, who split with his wife amid the stress of his stepdaughter's kidnapping (Carl was briefly treated as a suspect, then cleared).

Carl Probyn says what the girls and Jaycee need now is to avoid the media. To that end, they're not only turning down interviews and TV shows, he says, but they're not returning with Terry to Riverside, Calif., because the family doesn't want the girls to be seen by paparazzi.

The family members were in a Concord hotel for a few days, but checked out when paparazzi went looking for them, and they are now in an undisclosed house that's under guard by the FBI, Carl tells PEOPLE.

He says it's unclear what the family's costs will be over the next few years. Jaycee hasn't been to school since she was 11, and her daughters have never been to school. They also need lots of counseling. The cost of all this, he says, is anyone's guess.

"This has never happened in history – for someone to be recovered 18 years after an abduction," says Carl Probyn.

In response to offers of assistance, two trust funds for the girls have been set up at a financial services company where Jaycee's grandmother worked.

RELATED ARTICLE:
• 1991: Jaycee is abducted by strangers in front of her stepfather

Please join us at Peace4 the Missing

Missing Persons Awareness & Support
http://peace4missing.ning.com

Advocating Prostitution Alternatives

2009-08-30T15:58:00.010-04:00

For the past several months, Beyondmedia has been collaborating with PART (Prostitution Alternatives Round Table), a program of the Chicago Coalition for the Homeless, on a media workshop with survivors of prostitution. The women have developed media and activism skills, and have produced a video called Turning A Corner that they can use in their efforts to reduce stigma and raise awareness of the systemic causes of prostitution to advocate for change.

Are You Teaching Your Child How To Be Violent?

2009-08-30T12:22:00.010-04:00

It makes sense (and studies prove) that the more violent or aggressive behavior kids see, the more normal it becomes. With all the gore that fills the TV screen, violence can become an acceptable way to settle conflicts. Studies show that repeated exposure can lead to harmful acts and bullying. And they also show that kids become less empathetic to victims of violence. Kids younger than 7 are particularly vulnerable, since they don't easily distinguish fantasy from reality. They're also in the process of separating from their parents; that budding independence can bring normal insecurities and anxieties. When a child sees another child harmed on television, the impact is huge psychologically. So it's not surprising that the younger kids are, the longer lasting the effects of TV violence can be, including nightmares and increased worry that the world is a dangerous place.

The Family Media Agreement is a checklist that parents can use to have conversations with their children about media use and to establish guidelines that are right for their family. Some families are comfortable using it as a signed agreement. Others prefer to use it simply as a checklist to guide conversations.

Impact of Media Violence Tips

Why media violence matters

Watch

The facts: Kids' TV shows are really violent

Kids' TV shows have twice as many violent incidents as other shows
94% of T-rated games contain violence
Teens who watch more than 1 hour of TV per day are 4 times more likely than other teens to commit aggressive acts as adults
Reducing TV and video game use to less than 1 hour per day decreased physical aggression by 40% in a study of 3rd- and 4th-graders

Neighborhood Crime Watch Group Successfully Networks Online

2009-08-29T12:02:00.008-04:00

Boston Crime Prevention Volunteers Unite via New Online Social Network

The Allendale Street Neighborhood Crime Watch group. The officer on the left is Sgt. Eric Krause, and on the right is Lt. Michael Kern, both from E-13 District.

What a tangled web we've woven! The Internet has become something of a cyber smorgasbord with seemingly unlimited options for people to connect with others who share similar interests. Selections include Facebook, MySpace, Blogster, and Xanga, as well as search engines such as Google and Yahoo, which allow members to exchange photos, chat, and participate on discussion boards. Most sites allow special interest groups to create forums in which members can conduct business meetings online. Unfortunately, as these networks expand and multiply independently, group members often have difficulty finding and uniting fellow participants in one location. As a result, many organizations, such as the Boston Police Department (BPD) Neighborhood Crime Watch Unit, are developing their own private, centralized networks.

This past April, the BPD launched a pilot program called the E-13/Jamaica Plain Neighbors Network. This online network will provide residents of Boston 's Jamaica Plain neighborhood with organizational and communication tools, allowing them to learn about and take advantage of police, city, and community resources in order to combat crime. While the network is still in the evaluation phase, Jamaica Plain law enforcement officials are enthusiastic: “This is a powerful community policing outreach and engagement tool,” said Captain Christine Michalosky, Boston Police Commander of District 13. “We are excited about increasing communication and participation between the police and community in a fun and casual manner.” After testing is completed, the BPD plans to begin efforts to expand the network and integrate other neighborhoods within greater Boston.

When Problem Leads to Opportunity

Established in 1985, the Boston Neighborhood Crime Watch Program now comprises nearly 700 active groups, and program leaders have trained more than 100,000 citizens. The program had enjoyed slow and steady “block-by-block” growth for nearly two decades when a unique opportunity presented itself in 2006. That year, the residents of historic Charlestown, the second-oldest neighborhood in Boston and home to approximately 15,000 people, expressed interest in organizing the entire neighborhood into a community crime watch network. The BPD Neighborhood Crime Watch Unit responded by working with Charlestown resident volunteers and A-1 District police to organize what became known as the Coalition Organizing Model. Coalition participants provided crime prevention training to more than 500 residents and held rallies to generate interest in Neighborhood Crime Watch, which led to the creation of some 50 new Charlestown watch groups. These efforts resulted in a 16 percent overall reduction in crime in the Charlestown community.

As the Boston Neighborhood Crime Watch Program mushroomed and criminal activity decreased, the Police Department realized it was facing a new challenge—how to maintain the momentum needed to expand further and provide current watch volunteers with the crime prevention tools they needed to succeed with a staff of only three BPD employees. Past experience had shown that, over time, crime prevention groups disintegrate as members move away, priories shift, and leadership changes. Also, in large communities such as Boston, intergroup communication and collaboration are typically rare. Crime watch groups usually work independently, in isolation from neighboring groups, community service offices, and law enforcement, and members often do not know each other or have the means to share vital information.

In order to strengthen the Neighborhood Crime Watch Program and ensure its continued success, the BPD determined that program members required access to a centralized source for crime prevention tools, maps, and news. Furthermore, they needed a forum in which to interact with members of other watch groups and community leaders. To development this ambitious product, the BPD researched within the Boston Neighborhood Crime Watch community and found the answer from a seasoned volunteer with network design experience.

Commitment and Expertise

“When the police department called in February of 2006 to tell me that they had a job opening, I jumped at the chance,” said Neighborhoods Network Project Director Joseph Porcelli. With a degree in business administration and experience as a senior associate of a technology consulting firm, Porcelli, a civilian, had the technical skills the BPD needed to design and build an online network that would link the city's Neighborhood Crime Watch groups. Moreover, he brought to the department unwavering passion and commitment to community improvement. Once described on “New Morning,” a popular show on the Hallmark Channel (which featured him because he wore a nametag every day in 2007 to encourage people to meet their neighbors), as a “professional neighbor,” Porcelli is the director of Neighbors for Neighbors, a private web-based social network he founded in 2004 when violence hit a little too close to his Jamaica Plain neighborhood home. “I learned that two of my neighbors had been violently assaulted and mugged,” he said. “I took action, and with the help of the Boston Police Department, connected, informed, and empowered my neighbors.”

Porcelli first set out to educate residents by alerting them about the recent violence and passing out crime prevention literature at a neighborhood train stop. In response to requests generated from this effort, he organized a Neighborhood Crime Watch meeting for his street, which welcomed an unprecedented 60 attendees. Inspired by the high turnout, Porcelli, together with friends and neighbors, organized the first of several Jamaica Plain neighborhood socials. Soon, Neighbors for Neighbors was born. True to its motto—“Socialize. Organize. Make a difference”—the organization has to date brought together more than 4,000 Jamaica Plain residents, and volunteers have organized 72 social groups and community and partner projects. Recent milestones include recognition as a 501(c)3 tax-exempt organization in 2007 and the formal launch of the online Neighbors for Neighbors Jamaica Plain Organizing Network this past March. *

The Master Plan

After he joined the BPD, Porcelli collaborated with fellow members of the Neighborhood Crime Watch Unit team to design a network that incorporated law enforcement and crime prevention functions with social features of his previous project while supporting and sustaining the tremendous momentum generated by the Coalition Organizing Model. The goal of this network was clear-cut: to build community and reduce crime by connecting neighbors to each other and to community and police resources.

The resulting E-13 Jamaica Plain Neighbors Network comprises 11 “cluster groups” of streets representing the sections of neighborhoods within the E-13 Jamaica Plain District. In addition, streets groups have been set up for those groups that have indicated they would like a street-level group. Over the next couple of months, street groups will be created as new Neighborhood Crime Watch groups come online and existing groups join the network.

A screen shot of the Neighborhood Crime Watch group maps featured on the Neighbors Network homepage.

Neighbors Network: The Bells and Whistles

Porcelli built the Jamaica Plain Neighbors Network using Ning, a platform that allows developers to combine and customize features such as video, weblogs (“blogs”), forums within the cluster and street groups, photographs, and event calendars. “The message we consistently hear from the Neighborhood Crime Watch leaders and members across the city is that they want tools to help them meet and engage their neighbors,” Porcelli said. “ The Neighbors Network builds on a cornerstone Watch concept—neighbor interaction.” Like other social networks, the Neighbors Network allows members to email each other, create and customize personal pages, make friends with fellow members, and create blogs with content ranging from diaries to community notices. Current posts include an announcement regarding volunteer opportunities at an upcoming National Night Out event and a blog from the District 13 police unit regarding expansion of its bicycle policing activities.

The social network also serves as a centralized organizational and communication tool. Cluster groups provide members with a discussion board and administrators with the ability to manage group membership. Street group boards incorporate similar features and may be accessed only by their members. The Ning platform enables users to embed videos, photographs, and pod casts from outside media sources such as the Citizen Observer and BPD News . Members also can embed network widgets (“promotion boxes”) on their personal pages and other social networks to which they may belong.

Law enforcement personnel and city government officials also will benefit from the network. Network administrators from the BPD Neighborhood Crime Watch Unit, E-13 Police personnel, and the mayor's neighborhood coordinator will be able to email all network members, post to the network blog, and participate in cluster and street groups in order to send crime alerts, communicate trends and statistics, and promote police-sponsored events and training. “The system will allow community service officers and the Boston Police Department to easily communicate with the entire network,” explained Porcelli. “For example, they can send a message saying ‘We're seeing an increase in car vandalism in the XYZ area; therefore, please encourage your residents to remove their valuables and lock their cars.'”

Ironing Out the Wrinkles

Identifying user needs and customizing the platform to meet these needs proved to be the greatest challenge to designing the network structure. “Since this had not been done before, we had to figure out how to marry the functionality to our needs—which we've been discovering as we proceed,” Porcelli said.

Another challenge involved convincing groups already using other networks such as Yahoo and Google to switch to the new system. Porcelli noted that almost all have agreed to make the switch after having been made aware of the benefits of a central neighborhood network. “We found that we needed to shift member focus from their street to their neighborhood. The Neighbors Network makes it easier for neighbors to find and join their group online, and it gives leaders access to each other and neighboring groups, which makes collaboration possible,” he explained.

Spreading the Word

Although launch of the Neighbors Network was just announced in April, 420 new members have already joined. To further boost membership, the Neighborhood Crime Watch Unit has planned a campaign to publicize the network by posting flyers in every building in Jamaica Plain, providing information during Neighborhood Crime Watch group and homeowners association meetings, hosting network “how-to” classes, and encouraging members to invite their neighbors to join.

System evaluation is anticipated to continue through June. At some point, after any necessary adjustments are made, the BPD hopes to expand the network concept citywide. “We've got 11 districts; therefore, we need to do 10 more networks,” Porcelli said. “We hope to provide a large portion of the Boston community with education and crime prevention tools within a year's time.”

Early response from network members has been overwhelmingly positive. “Based on the initial feedback we have received, we think we've hit a home run,” Porcelli said. “Members of the network have made comments such as ‘This is a wonderful tool' and ‘Makes crime watch fun.'” The convenience of 24-hour network access is attracting many new members; in fact, more than half of all those signed up to participate had never taken part in neighborhood crime prevention prior to the launch of the Neighbors Network.

“We like to say that the Neighbors Network ‘builds community while you sleep.' The pubic can access it and join neighborhood and street groups at a time convenient to them,” Porcelli noted. “It's like an investment that earns interest, except the interest is not money but social capital.”

Joseph Porcelli with Jenny ("Big Momma") P hoto credit: Margaux Joffe/Faces of JP

Links

http://e13.bostoncrimewatch.com/ (homepage of the new Jamaica Plain Neighbors Network)

www.cityofboston.gov (official website of the city of Boston)

www.scsdma.org (Suffolk County Sheriff's Department)

www.cityofboston.gov/police/ (Boston Police Department)

www.bpdnews.com (Boston Police Department news)

www.bostoncrimewatch.com (Boston Neighborhood Crime Watch Program)

www.jamaicaplain.com (Jamaica Plain neighborhood website)

www.JosephPorcelli.com (Porcelli's website, where he share his reflections on making a difference)

http://about.ning.com/index.php (homepage for Ning, Inc., founders of the Ning platform)

Please Join Us At...

Peace4 the Missing

http://peace4missing.ning.com

An Online Network for Missing Persons and Targets of Abuse

THE SQUEAKY WHEEL TOUR COMES TO OLIVET, MI

2009-08-12T15:33:00.000-04:00

Time: October 27, 2009 from 7pm to 10pm
Location: Mott Auditorium at Olivet College
Street: Mott Auditorium at Olivet College
City/Town: Olivet, MI
Website or Map: http://www.trackmissing.org
Phone: 517-554-1659
Event Type: concert
Organized By: Chad Scott of TrackMissing
Latest Activity: 10 minutes ago

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Event Description

The Squeaky Wheel Tour will be coming to Mott Auditorium at Olivet College on October 27, 2009 starting at 7:00 PM.

The SWT is a National Missing Person Concert Tour conducted by Jannel Rapp and Clemstreet of Gina for the Missing www.411gina.org out of California. This is the first time this tour will be coming to Michigan. http://www.411gina.org/squeakywheeltour.htm

This year the SWT will have a full camera crew traveling with them to film for a TV show that will air on TLC. The crew will also be filming interviews with families of the missing. The Michigan concert will also be streamed live over the Internet.

This is one of the biggest opportunities that Michigan families with a missing loved one have ever had to bring awareness to their missing family member. We are asking that any Michigan family who would like to have their missing family member featured at the concert and on the show contact us. If any Law Enforcement or media know of a missing person case that needs this attention please contact us.

The volunteers of TrackMissing have put a great deal of time and effort into making this event happen. TM volunteers will be responsible to make sure all arrangements and everything needed for the concert are in place. We will also be responsible for obtaining several bands/singers from Michigan to perform at the concert. As of now TM's 13 year old volunteer country singer, Tiffani Jones from Marshall, MI http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOpS20YFlDk will be opening the concert. She will be performing the song that is being written, composed and produced by award winning producer Danny Borgers from Nashville, TN (son of Missing Woman Ida Richardson-Anderson 1958 from Ann Arbor, MI). This song will be a first of its kind focusing on a families fight to find their missing loved ones.

We are also working with the Marshall area Jaycees to conduct a "karaoke contest" of area singing talent. The winner of the contest will get to sing a song at the concert.

Mario Aleman "DJ Mario" from Marshall will be the M.C.

The focus of this concert is to bring awareness to missing people. Mott seats 387 people and tickets will be available for $10.00 at the beginning of September (free tickets will provided to family members who have a missing loved one and would like to be at the concert). Proceeds from the concert will go to TrackMissing to help fund future awareness and search efforts. We will be seeking sponsors for the concert to help offset our costs to bring this huge event to Michigan. Full sponsorship will be $4000.00 and partial will be $1000.00.

We would like to ask your outlet to let people know this event is set and is coming to Michigan. We need to have the families who can benefit from this become aware of this opportunity and contact us sooner rather than later. We will also be doing major updates to our website over the weekend o get all of the information and what is needed for the concert as well as the search for Mary Lands on September 26, 2009. An overwhelming amount of request for our services over the last couple of weeks have caused a delay in that information being posted sooner. On the other hand 2 missing person cases we were helping with resulted in safe recoveries in a 5 day span.

Jannel Rapp (Gina for the Missing) 877-411-4462
Chad Scott (TrackMissing) 517-554-1659
Danny Borgers 615-500-6420
Diane Jones (Tiffani's mom) 517-392-1398
Angel (Marshall Jaycees) 269-274-2562

Chad Scott
Co-Founder
TrackMissing
www.trackmissing.org
517-554-1659

Please join us at Peace4 the Missing
Missing Persons Awareness and Support Network
http://peace4missing.ning.com

Sometimes rather than destroying us, pain and stress sometimes can make us stronger and grow

2009-08-06T20:23:00.009-04:00

I have, as of late, been exploring this notion of "post traumatic growth". I rather like the concept because, for me, it supports the notion that our suffering is actually doing something beneficial and that we'll end up doing great things because of all the crap we've been through.

Post Traumatic Growth from Stress

Tony Robbins

We have all heard of post-traumatic stress syndrome. We have studied how human beings deal with and react to extreme stressors they encounter in their lives: war, attack, financial ruin, illness, death. There are thousands of tragedies and crises that can produce extreme stress in human beings. But very few people have actually studied how people respond to stress in a positive way. There is something called post-traumatic growth. You can have amazing personal growth come out of extremely stressful situations. And that's what I talk to people about. When you face extreme stress you have a couple of options. One positive option is to face that stress, do something and try to deal with that problem in your life. Reappraise your life. Decide that you "have to look at life differently." It's the proactive approach.

Three benefits of extreme stress:

You discover what you are made of. You come to realize that you are stronger than you ever dreamed. Your sense of what you are capable of shifts and becomes an "immune system" that allows you to face other challenges in your future more easily.
It deepens all of your relationships. You get to find out who your real friends are. The depth and the appreciation of those friendships is extraordinary. When you experience an extreme stressor and you aren't able to give everyone everything they want, your fair-weather friends disappear. Remember, what truly makes people most happy is their internal emotional and social relationships.
Changes your consciousness. When things are going well we keep expecting things to keep going well. It puts a different perspective on your life. You value the little things in life more.

People who face extreme stress, instead of hiding from it, can experience benefits. We are all stronger than we think we are. Winter doesn't last forever and what follows is a beautiful springtime. If you remember that, you can go to work and focus on what you can do to change your life, change your perspective, rather than denying it or living in fear.

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(Taken from the APA Help Center)

Find out Your Potential for "Post Traumatic Growth" with this Self-Quiz

Law to Help Families Find Missing Loved Ones (Billy's Law) was introduced today by Congressman Murphy

2009-08-06T16:48:00.005-04:00

"Nobody should have to go through what the Smolinskis have gone through..."

Murphy Introduces Billy's Law to Help Families Find Missing Loved Ones

August 6, 2009

Contact: Kristen Bossi

(202) 225-4476

HARTFORD - Today, Congressman Chris Murphy (CT-5) was joined by family members of missing persons from Connecticut and local law enforcement officials to announce that he is introducing federal legislation to help families find missing loved ones.

"Nobody should have to go through what the Smolinskis have gone through.
Billy's Law will give more tools to families who are going through the heart wrenching experience of learning their loved one has gone missing. The systems we have in place now for law enforcement and medical examiners to use to help families find their loved ones don't talk to each other. That's inexcusable, and so the bill I am introducing fixes that problem, once and for all," said Murphy.

Murphy's legislation is named after Billy Smolinski of Waterbury, who went missing on August 24, 2004 at the age of 31. Billy's family has experienced many obstacles in searching for their missing son, including the fact that federal law mandates law enforcement report missing children, but not adults or unidentified bodies. While law enforcement can voluntarily report this information, a lack of resources and knowledge of the system often prevents them from doing so.

"The notion that we are living in a CSI society is nothing more than a television fantasy. My son Billy vanished five years ago, and in our efforts to find him we opened a Pandora's Box of problems plaguing the world of the missing and the unidentified dead. Just about anything that could go wrong in the effort to find our son went wrong. Law enforcement training has to catch up with science and technology and Congressman Murphy's act will ensure that it does," said Janice Smolinski, Billy's mother.

Every year tens of thousands of Americans go missing, never to be seen by their loved ones again. At the same time, there are also an estimated 40,000 sets of unidentified human remains that are being held or disposed of across the country, and no organized system to match cases and remains. Murphy's "Help Find the Missing Act" (Billy's Law) is an effort to fix the enormous gaps in the nation's missing persons systems and bring closure to the loved ones of the missing, while providing law enforcement, coroners and medical examiners the resources and guidance to do the reporting.

Billy's Law empowers families and loved ones of the missing to find justice by helping to secure funding for the only federal missing persons and unidentified remains database that can be cross-searched, accessed and added to by the public - the National Missing and Unidentified Persons System (NamUs). This database enables the loved ones of the missing to spend countless hours searching for a match and add invaluable information to the case profile that only they know.

The legislation helps to streamline the reporting process for law enforcement and medical examiners by connecting two major federal missing persons and unidentified remains databases- the FBI's National Crime Information Center (NCIC) and the NamUs. Connecting these databases makes them more comprehensive and more likely to lead to a missing person or unidentified remains match.

Billy's Law builds upon Connecticut's 2007 Law Enforcement and Missing Persons law as it calls for the issuance of broad recommendations for standards and procedures for law enforcement to follow in dealing with missing persons and unidentified remains

Rep. Vickie Nardello, who represents the 89th District which includes Bethany, Cheshire and Prospect, said: "I applaud Rep. Murphy's efforts to pass federal legislation to adopt uniformed procedures on how we handle missing persons. A national policy will be the culmination of Jan Smolinski's dreams and hard work. During the upcoming Connecticut legislative session we will continue to pursue additional reform of missing person procedures. With the help of law enforcement agencies we expect passage of this legislation in Connecticut."

Senator Joan V. Hartley, 15th Senatorial District said: "I first of all want to commend Congressman Murphy on the 'Help Find the Missing Act (Billy's Law)' initiative which is sorely needed not only in the 5th Congressional district but throughout the State of Connecticut as well as the United States. In this age of high speed data access and information, we should at the very least, be able to ensure that citizens and their families, especially in times of crisis, are provided every access to information in seeking to identify the whereabouts of the persons that they seek."

Soul Touching Ads by Yasmin Ahmad, The Storyteller

2009-08-04T20:57:00.002-04:00

Yasmin Ahmad (July 1, 1958 - July 25, 2009) was a critically-acclaimed multi-award winning film director, writer and scriptwriter from Malaysia and was also the executive creative director at Leo Burnett Kuala Lumpur. Her television commercials and films are well-known in Malaysia for their humour, heart and love that crosses cross-cultural barriers, in particular her ads for Petronas, the national oil and gas company. Her works have won multiple awards both within Malaysia and internationally.

I had recently read over at Yasmin's personal blog, she had written her last entry on July 22, 2009...in this last post one can't help but notice a sense of foreshadowing in its title which is called "A song of longing I'm hoping to use for the ending in Wasurenagusa."
http://yasminthefilmmaker.blogspot.com/2009/07/song-of-longing-im-hoping-to-use-for.html

Below are some of the ads that Yasmin Ahmad did for Petronas, which are incredibly beautiful and touching, often provoking "good tears" upon viewing. Such a compassionate, heartfelt method of "selling" a message. I highly recommend viewing them all, but AT LEAST watch the first one below on the Funeral...you'll be so glad you did... ;)

Undoubtedly the incredibly talented and compassionate life of Yasmin Ahmad, The Storyteller, will be missed by so many. In this interview on July 21, we heard her talk candidly about being colourless and living as one people.

Artist Natalie Grant, Advocate for Victims of Human Trafficking

2009-08-03T15:05:00.007-04:00

The Home Foundation was founded in 2005 by singer/songwriter Natalie Grant. After an episode of Law and Order awakened Natalie to the real-life, ongoing tragedy of Human Trafficking, she threw herself into a deeper research on the issue. What she found disturbed her so greatly, that Natalie knew she must do something to fight for these helpless victims – precious souls without a voice.

After learning that over 10 million children world-wide have been sold into sexual slavery, and inspired by her trip to the red-light district of Mumbai, India, Natalie Grant founded the HOME Foundation with one goal in mind: to help those who may not otherwise be helped.

About Natalie Grant: One of the genre's biggest names and GMA Dove Award Female Vocalist of the Year for four consecutive years, Curb recording artist Natalie Grant is among a select number of artists to have also achieved a formidable foothold at mainstream media and radio. A powerhouse vocalist, heart-gripping songwriter and charismatic performer, she's eager to push boundaries and thus has become Christian music's top selling Adult Contemporary female solo artist in 2005, 2006 and 2008. Recently, Grant received RIAA Gold certification of her 2005 breakthrough album, Awaken.

When Jon Van Dyke Went Maliciously Missing

2009-08-01T16:27:00.009-04:00

Jon Van Dyke faked his own disappearance, leaving his family devastated, lost and forced to endure an aimless, constant state of the horrific unknown.

Officially a missing person, vast resources and tax payer's funds were spent trying to locate him. His wife, Maureen Reintjes, out of love for her husband and father of her girls, dedicated every waking moment possible to Finding Her Missing Husband.

Meanwhile, Van Dyke was just "hiding-out", eluding authorities, tormenting his family, concerned friends and countless volunteers who were all desperately looking for him, a Maliciously Missing Man.

When Jon faked his disappearance he committed the most selfish of actions imaginable. His family are the ones who suffered.

Maureen's life was now ridden with unrelenting anguish ... burdened with the finanacial nightmares left by a "missing husband" ... losing 2 homes ... she was left homeless ... this is just a peek at the hell of living in the unknown, Maureen's everday life for over 4 years.

Maureen's Heartwrenching Quest to Find Jon Van Dyke, Her Missing Husband

Maliciously Missing Awareness Group Network

Jon Van Dyke, A Maliciously Missing Man

Maliciously Missing Law (draft)

MEDIA COVERAGE OF THE MALICIOUSLY MISSING MAN, JON VAN DYKE
Diane Dimond's Coverage of The Maliciously Missing
The Maliciously Missing on Denny Griffin's TalkRadio Show
The Levi Page Show Highlights The Maliciously Missing
Burl Barer of In Cold Blog Looks Into Runaway Husbands as well as Jon Van Dyke
The Huffington Post
True Slant
Investigative Discovery

Please join us at Peace4 the Missing
Missing Persons Awareness and Support Network
http://peace4missing.ning.com

Karren Kraemer's Relentless Search For Her Daughter, Becky

2009-07-30T12:18:00.002-04:00

A Mother's Crusade for a Missing Daughter

Kurt Chandler,

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

It was a wintry Saturday night in Milwaukee, and 23-year-old Becky Marzo was out with friends at a local dance club, drinking, dancing, playing darts. Around midnight, Becky's cell phone rang. It was Carl Rodgers II, her live-in boyfriend, wanting to know when she was coming home. "I'm not ready to leave," she told him. A few minutes later, he called again, upset. They argued, and Becky hung up. He called again -- and then again.

"Just turn the phone off," her friend Kristina Randall finally said.

At 2 in the morning, Kristina drove Becky home and waited at the curb for the sign that all was well. "She turned on the light and waved out the window," Kristina says.

And then she was gone.

Becky's mother, Karren Kraemer, sits at her dining-room table in jeans and a sweatshirt. The suburban home, in a cul-de-sac near the town of Oconomowoc, WI, about 35 miles west of Milwaukee, is warm and bright, but worry lines crease the 47-year-old mother's face.

"I was getting ready to go to work," Karren says, remembering the chilly day in January 2004 when her niece called to say that Becky had disappeared. "She said, 'Auntie Karren, I don't know what's going on, but something's happened to Becky.'" A wave of dread swept over Karren; she frantically dialed her daughter's cell but didn't get an answer -- just Becky's voice mail, her greeting backed by Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You."

"I told my husband I thought something happened," Karren says, clenching her hands. "I'd been having dreams about Becky. So when my niece called, I thought right away that Becky was dead." Fueling her fear was the fact that Karren and her husband, Dave, hadn't spoken to their daughter in eight months, following a string of arguments they'd had with her about Carl. They knew he was abusive -- they'd seen the bruises -- but their daughter had refused to leave him.

"She would defend him and say, 'It was an accident,'" Karren says. "But we had heard the excuses long enough. We decided to try tough love and told her she couldn't come home again until she broke up with him." Karren stares out the window. "There are some things parents will never forgive themselves for," she says. "And that's one of them."

Karren called the police and said that none of Becky's friends or colleagues had heard from her since the night of December 13, 2003. "But they said Becky had the right to go missing," and didn't open an investigation, she says.

Karren knew that Becky wouldn't just vanish on her own. She was right on the verge of completing an accounting degree, while holding down a job at Target. "She had never missed a day at work," Karren says. "She wanted to be an accountant, have kids, the whole white-picket-fence thing." So Karren hired a private investigator, continued trying to call Becky, and kept after the police. Time and again, she says, the officers dismissed her concerns, despite the fact that Becky had once filed a complaint against Carl.

Finally, Karren drove to a Milwaukee precinct station. "I'm not leaving until you file a report," she insisted. As she waited, officers brought Carl in for questioning -- with Karren in the same room. She was stunned. "I know you killed Becky!" she told him. Carl didn't blink. Police classified Becky as a missing person, but didn't open a homicide investigation since there was no evidence of a crime.

It's not unusual for a case like Becky's to be sidelined by police. Hundreds of thousands of missing-person complaints are filed each year in the U.S., and, unlike the case of, say, Natalee Holloway -- the American teen who famously disappeared in Aruba in 2005 -- most cases don't get much notice. If a family does persuade police to open a homicide investigation, the case can drag on for months, even years, without a resolution. Most, in fact, are never solved, and it falls to the families to do the legwork.

That was certainly the case for Karren Kraemer, who, with hardly any information to go on, became a mother on an extreme mission -- channeling her sorrow, anger, and guilt into an all-consuming drive to find her daughter.

Karren's crusade began with flyers; she posted hundreds of them around Milwaukee, on lampposts and telephone poles in Carl's neighborhood, in the parking lot where he worked, along the street where his parents lived. "Please help us find Becky," the flyers implored, showing her smiling, round face framed by blonde hair, her vibrant blue eyes behind wire-rim glasses. Listed on the flyers were Becky's identifying features: 5-foot-3, 130 pounds, double-pierced ears, a tattoo on her back of a heart pricked by a red rose.

Posting the flyers became an obsession for Karren: She would get out of bed in the middle of the night, fill a thermos with strong coffee, and drive from her rural home to paper the town in the predawn hours, often in tears. Sometimes she would talk to people on the street, even vagrants: "There were some bad neighborhoods, but I can't remember ever being scared. I mean, what kind of person would hurt a mother who's trying to find her daughter?"

As she made her rounds, memories of Becky haunted her. "Becky was bubbly," Karren says, pointing to photos in the front hallway. "She was petite and brainy, but naive. And she was such a trouper. She always brought home the underdogs from school -- she felt that if she could only befriend them, their lives would change." Becky volunteered in the D.A.R.E. antidrug program in school and played clarinet; on a band trip to New York, she gave her money to homeless people in Central Park. "She thought she could fix the world," Karren recalls.

Soon Karren ratcheted up her campaign even more, quitting her six-figure job as a manager at Kinko's to take a lower-paying job at Target, in the hope of ingratiating herself with Becky's former colleagues to gain information. "They told me Becky would come to work with bruises on her cheeks," she says. But they hadn't heard from her since the day she'd vanished.

Karren then sent around a feel-good video of Becky to local news stations, showing a sentimental young woman who collected Winnie the Pooh trinkets, loved country music, and was addicted to Yahtzee. Karren also called on psychics, following their leads to a set of railroad tracks and a river where they believed her daughter might be buried. She even enlisted "cadaver dogs" to search for a body. "If a psychic tells me there's a chance that Becky is down at the bottom of a river, I want to jump in and find her," she says. "You try anything."

Karren began to stalk Carl as well, reporting any suspicious move he made to the police. "I sat outside the house," she says. On the hood of his parked car, she would leave little calling cards with an illustration of Pooh, a reminder that she was always nearby. "I wanted to keep the fire burning under him," she says, with anger in her voice. "I wanted him to watch me hang flyers. I wanted him to watch me knock on doors. I wanted him to know he wasn't going to get away with it." Yet she also kept her distance, never confronting him face-to-face. And she continued to ask police to look into Carl's involvement, to no avail. "Right now, Becky is on the bottom of the workload," snapped one detective. Karren was livid. "You owe it to me to find my baby!" she said, sobbing.

In December 2004, a year after Becky's disappearance, Karren tried yet another approach. "I brought police the video of Becky," she says. "I went down to the precinct with a bag of peanuts, cookies, hot chocolate. And they sat down and watched the video." Finally, thanks to her perseverance, investigators began pursuing Becky's disappearance as a possible homicide, questioning Carl's friends and family and searching his house. But the proof fell short. There simply wasn't enough evidence to charge Carl with a crime.

Karren's hope began to fade. Becky's credit cards showed no activity; her driver's license had expired; she'd left behind an uncashed paycheck for $500. Karren struggled to accept the fact that her daughter was really gone. "I wouldn't let anybody go in her bedroom," she says. "I didn't change a thing. We held on to all her clothes and photo albums."

Still, she believed there was enough circumstantial evidence to find Carl guilty. So she kept digging. She discovered that Carl's uncle, a former cop, owned a funeral home not far from Carl's house -- and that his car and Carl's had been parked outside the funeral home at 4 a.m. on the day Becky had gone missing. (Records of parking tickets had confirmed this.) Karren convinced a district attorney to approve the exhumation of two graves in a cemetery south of Milwaukee -- burials performed by Carl's uncle days after Becky's disappearance. But still, no luck.

Karren's punishing crusade took its toll. Her marriage suffered as Dave grew withdrawn, declining to participate in his wife's increasingly driven campaign. Her health deteriorated as well. "I got very sick," she says. "I had an erratic heart rate and had to have surgery for that. I had stress fractures in both feet because I walked so much. It was all stress," she adds, tears welling in her eyes. "Becky had so much more to give. And this guy took so much away."

Born in Texas and raised in Milwaukee, Karren met her husband, a maintenance engineer and avid sportsman, when she was 17. They married and had five children, raising them in the Milwaukee suburb of Oak Creek. "We were what you'd consider an average family," Karren says, recalling the days when her children were young. "We were strict parents. When the streetlights came on, the kids had to come home."

Karen raised the kids while studying business management and criminal justice at the University of Wisconsin in Milwaukee. For years, she worked as a police dispatcher, which is where she developed a keen eye for investigative work. In 2000, Karren and Dave moved their family to Oconomowoc, where they live today in a three-bedroom home surrounded by flowerbeds, the garage crowded with bicycles and a riding lawn mower.

Becky had some health issues when she was young -- she was treated for depression as a teenager, and suffered hearing loss that required several surgeries -- yet her health didn't diminish her playfulness. "Becky was real fun," laughs Karren, grabbing a bottle of water from her refrigerator. "I remember when she was maybe 16 or 17, we went to the grocery store together, and she picked up a package of Depends, then yelled to me down the aisle: 'Hey Mom, what size diapers do you wear?'"

Becky married young, at age 19, taking the last name of her groom, a less-than-ambitious guy named Mike Marzo. But the marriage soon fell apart. She was 20 and very impressionable when she met Carl, in February 2001. He was 12 years older and a charmer, a handsome man who raced high-performance automobiles and rode a red motorcycle. Six months after they met, Becky moved into his place.

"We started noticing pinch marks on her arms," Karren recalls. "And her behavior changed. Whenever she came home, we would get into an argument and then she'd cry. I said, 'This is crazy. We don't know why you're staying with him. You don't have to.'"

Karren and Dave persuaded their daughter to move back home with them around Christmas in 2002. Carl was furious. He called Becky repeatedly. One time Karren intercepted the call. "How could you hurt her like that?" she yelled at him. His reply? "She fell."

Eventually, like so many victims of domestic violence, Becky gave in to Carl. "Don't you understand? I have no choice," she said to her father. "I have to go back."

A few months went by before Becky finally called the police, in April 2003. Carl had broken her nose, bruised her ribs, and torn out chunks of her hair. He was arrested and charged with battery. "At this point we're begging her to break up with him," Karren says. But Becky wouldn't budge. In what they saw as a last resort, Karren and Dave pursued their "tough love" approach, and told her to leave him or leave them, essentially.

So Becky took off for Florida, and Karren tracked her down by phone. "But she just wanted me to leave her alone," she says, her eyes downcast. "That was the last time I talked to her."

Soon after, Becky returned to Milwaukee and stayed with a friend. A day or two later, she abruptly moved back in with Carl and recanted her allegations. "I can tell you I probably cried every day for a month after I found out," Karren says. "I had a premonition: I just knew that this man was going to kill her...if only I could go back in time."

Months passed. On December 10, 2003, a judge formally dismissed the battery charges against Carl. Three days later, Becky disappeared.

Amid the investigation into Becky's disappearance, Karren discovered a new calling. Last year, she cofounded Broken Wings Network, an advocacy group for families of missing persons and domestic-violence victims; she also speaks about domestic violence at Wisconsin high schools and correctional facilities. Debbie Culberson, who started Broken Wings with Karren, also had a daughter who went missing, after breaking off a brutal relationship 12 years ago. "We've dug up barns; we've drained ponds," says Debbie, 54, over the phone, her voice strained by grief. "You picture yourself holding your daughter, her physical body, in your arms for all those years. Just knowing where that body is...that's what Karren and I don't have."

The two have found solace in their shared cause. But solace isn't all Karren is looking for. She needs resolution. Justice.

And there was certainly a measure of it in the shocking phone call she received from police on October 5, 2007: Carl, they said, had been found dead inside his car in his garage -- a victim of probable carbon-monoxide poisoning. A month earlier, he had been charged with raping his girlfriend; a trial had been set for January 23. He'd left a suicide note in his kitchen: "I never killed anybody," it read. "I never raped anybody. I'm just tired of all this."

For Karren, it meant she would never again have to lay eyes on the man she believes killed her daughter, or picture him enjoying his life -- getting on with it. But it also meant that Carl would take the knowledge of Becky's whereabouts with him to the grave. Still, Karren says, "I'm not going to let him win. I will find her."

She doesn't blame herself for Carl's suicide. "I think he did it because he felt it was the final control over what would happen to him," she says. "I'm past the point of hatred, but I haven't forgiven him. Forgiveness is a very personal thing." For his part, Carl's stepfather, Jeffrey Stemper, says, "This woman had been harassing him [for years]. No evidence has ever been shown that he did this crime." A huge portion of Karren's life now remains on hold. She has cashed out her 401K to pay for her ongoing investigation, and her marriage is in disarray. "Dave and I argue every day," she admits. "I'm just not who I was four years ago."

Since then, she has had a recurring dream: Becky standing before her, holding her hand out to Karren, crying, and asking her mother to find her.

So Karren's search goes on -- along with the police investigation. Says Detective Vickie Hall, "If I were a missing person, I would like to have Karren Kraemer looking for me."

"I'm at the point where I'll do anything to find Becky," Karren says. "Until you can bury your child, you really don't have that closure. I want to say good-bye."

Kurt Chandler is a senior editor at Milwaukee Magazine. His work has appeared in The New York Times and The Advocate and on Salon.com. His latest book is Shaving Lessons: A Memoir of Father and Son (Chronicle Books).

Reprinted with Permission of Hearst Communications, Inc. Originally Published: A Mother's Crusade for a Missing Daughter

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2009/07/29/hearstmagfamily345286.DTL

Please join us at Peace4 the Missing
Missing Persons Awareness and Support Network
http://peace4missing.ning.com

When Your Missing Loved Ones Search Ends With Grief

2009-07-29T18:21:00.003-04:00

When a missing person is found deceased

Sometimes the discovery of a missing loved one is not always favourable. Family members and friends may be notified by police that the missing person is deceased. This can give rise to a mixture of emotions.

There may be feelings of relief that the search is finally over. The anxiety has subsided and there is a sense of ‘knowing'. Family members and friends may feel that they are able to seek some resolution for they now have the opportunity toformally farewell their loved one.

At the same time there may be feelings of grief and loss that finally surface once your fears have been confirmed. Family members and friends now mourn the loss of their loved one with greater certainty. They are also saddened and disappointed that their search efforts did not end with a better discovery – one that would reunite them with their loved one.

Accompanying these feelings is often a sense of bewilderment and confusion. With the news that their loved one is deceased, family members and friends have a limited opportunity to learn about the circumstances that led up to the missing person's absence. Often they are left wondering about the possible answers to their many questions.

As mentioned in the preceding section, preoccupation with unanswered questions can continue to stifle daily living. The ability to concentrate and carry out responsibilities may be hindered.

When we live for long periods with an ambiguous loss some families begin to get used to not knowing, once a death has been confirmed that glimmer of hope that the person may be alive is extinguished. There are no further possibilities available to them.

Families may continue to seek assistance from their counsellor or they may wish to seek alternate support from bereavement services. There is no need to make quick decisions, do what you feel will be of greater support to you.

The Long Wait – When a missing person remains missing

Although the majority of missing persons are located , a number are not. Many family members and friends have waited years, and continue to wait, for news of their loved one. They go on with their daily lives while never losing sight of a possible reunion:

‘Each day when I wake up I don't think its another day that I haven't seen my daughter I think its another day closer to her coming home'

The journey travelled by these family members and friends often becomes more manageable in time. Yet, it is still a difficult path. Emotions can continue to fluctuate indefinitely, akin to a turbulent roller coaster ride. This is because the experience of loss remains uncertain and lacks clarity.

Although reported sightings of the missing person can bring hope to family members and friends, the reports can also “rekindle a grief that was beginning to heal” . This in turn can intensify the swing of the emotional pendulum, which swings between feelings of hope or contentment, and feelings of despair.

It is important to recognise that this is a normal part of the journey travelled by the family members and friends of missing persons. Unfortunately, though there is no quick solution – “people must find their own way out of the ambiguity” . However, with the support and guidance of an experienced counsellors and mental health service provider the emotional swings can become more manageable.

Someone is Missing - website and booklet that focuses on the emotional and mental health needs of families and friends of missing persons.

The Families and Friends of Missing Persons Unit provides a free and confidential counselling service. FFMPU believe that by reaching out for support the experience of having someone missing might become a little easier.

FFMPU is the only service of its kind in Australia that provides specialised therapeutic support to families and friends of missing people.

The counselling service responds to the ambiguous or unresolved loss that follows the disappearance of a loved one. This type of loss is not commonly experienced in the community and people often speak of a sense of isolation and confusion when faced with a loss that is can be temporary or permanent.

FFMPU uses the national counselling framework 'Supporting those who are left behind' when engaging with families and friends of missing people. The framework was developed following a Churchill Fellowship in 2006 that explored the international approach to unresolved loss. The framework is useful not only for service providers but for families and friends wanting to understand better the impact of 'missing' on their lives. The framework, published by the Australian Federal Police National Missing Persons Coordination Centre, can be downloaded here or a kit containing the framework and an instructional DVD can be ordered free of charge from missing@afp.gov.au

The more recently written report, Best Practice in Counselling Models Relevant to Families and Friends of Missing Persons, (Hunter Institute of Mental Health, 2001), provides an extensive overview of the relevant literature. It also outlines various counselling models and their suitability for use with missing persons-related support services. Eight recommendations are made, for the provision of more appropriate training for those providing support services, and for suitably trained counselors to be clearly accessible to their client base.

The focus of the current report is on the various support needs expressed by relatives and friends of missing persons and how these needs can most satisfactorily be met.

You may download a copy of the full report in Word format (307 KB): Support Needs of Family and Friends of Long Term Missing Persons

Actively Aware

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Time: September 29, 2009 from 9pm to 10pm ESTLocation: Your Computer/OnlineWebsite or Map: http://www.blogtalkradio.co...Phone: Call-in Number: (646) 478-0982

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Links

THE SQUEAKY WHEEL TOUR COMES TO OLIVET, MI

Event Description

Sometimes rather than destroying us, pain and stress sometimes can make us stronger and grow

I have, as of late, been exploring this notion of "post traumatic growth". I rather like the concept because, for me, it supports the notion that our suffering is actually doing something beneficial and that we'll end up doing great things because of all the crap we've been through.

Law to Help Families Find Missing Loved Ones (Billy's Law) was introduced today by Congressman Murphy

Soul Touching Ads by Yasmin Ahmad, The Storyteller

Artist Natalie Grant, Advocate for Victims of Human Trafficking

When Jon Van Dyke Went Maliciously Missing

Karren Kraemer's Relentless Search For Her Daughter, Becky

When Your Missing Loved Ones Search Ends With Grief

Time: September 29, 2009 from 9pm to 10pm EST
Location: Your Computer/Online
Website or Map: http://www.blogtalkradio.co...
Phone: Call-in Number: (646) 478-0982