Americans in Singapore

Gimme One Reason To Stay Here...

2008-07-07T11:54:00.004+08:00

And we'll turn right back around...

Living in Singapore was a wonderful experience for both of us. It's hard for me to put into words how special it was for my WHH (Way-Hot Husband = Michael). He was able to work with a team of exceptional talent that had been without leadership for several months. It didn't take long for him to learn about each of his team members' talents and their willingness to work toward the unusual goals that his team had set.

Honestly?? I was almost sick of hearing the acronym for the new platform that his team had developed! He was on the phone most nights with Europe or the U.S. along with the Singaporean team members for the last 2+ years. The coolest part is that the entire project has been successful and nothing like this has ever been done before.

I have always been proud of my husband. He is loving, honorable, trustworthy, sincere, and a loving father -- qualities that aren't always so easy to find. What an adventure the last 30 years has been. It sure doesn't seem like it's been that long to me.

I think this video sums up what I'm trying to say, but in pictures instead. I would prefer to say, "We'll see you again soon!" rather than "Farewell".

Back in the USA Part 2

2008-07-05T21:20:00.002+08:00

Even more compelling video for your viewing pleasure...

Back in the USA

2008-07-05T11:02:00.002+08:00

This video is unedited, and NSFW. That means "not safe for work"OR Mom, young nephews, and anyone else easily offended by stupidity.

Happy birthday America!

In Memoriam

2008-06-21T21:29:00.003+08:00

Some Good News

2008-04-21T18:50:00.000+08:00

Good news! Miss Ann's raffle has raised almost $5,000 -- enough money to send Lisa and her family to Disney World, plus a little extra for her to use however she wishes. Honestly, it is just awesome that so many people came together to help a friend realize her dream before she starts chemo treatments.

Lisa plans to attend TequilaCon '08, too since she lives in the area. I'll actually get to meet her after reading and commenting for a year! There will be much squeeee-ing, hugging, and kissing going on at the Lounge 'n Lanes in Philly that night. Especially, when we'll have the likes of Dustin wearing the very special outfit his mom sent him. ROFLMAO!

The other good news is that our niece, Alex, and her boyfriend, Adam, are out of the hospital. Adam was fortunate in that his injuries were not too extensive because his seatbelt did not break. He had two broken ribs and the right side of his body was bruised.

Alex was not so fortunate. She was driving. Probably too fast, but do you know any 19-year old who doesn't? It was raining, and she hit a bad pothole that she couldn't see. I'm fairly certain that she was driving her dad's big Chevy truck and the seat-belt broke. The truck flipped numerous times (I think 5), she was ejected, the truck rolled over her left shoulder and her arm was completely severed. She also sustained a broken eye-socket, broken jaw, a laceration on her face, and significant blood-loss (there could be more, but this is all I can recall).

A passerby helped them, found her arm, and called for help. They were transported to Methodist Hospital, the trauma center in Indianapolis. However, none of the surgeons there wanted to attempt to reattach her arm because her shoulder was so damaged. I think it was her big brother, Matt, who made the decision to find another doctor willing to attempt the surgery. Her parents were in Florida at the time of the accident (they're moving there), so a lot of the decision-making was on his shoulders. He just turned 24 April 13, but has served two times in Iraq. He told his mom and dad, "This was the hardest thing I've had to do in my life." I guess you do what you've got to do, and he did a fine job!

The doctor willing to attempt to reattach Alex's arm was at St. Vincent's Hospital. She underwent numerous surgeries to remove dead tissue and bone, transfusions, as well as litres and litres of fluids. By the end of the weekend her little body weighed 50 pounds more than when she was admitted.

The doctors decided to allow her eye-socket to heal without surgery, but they repaired her jaw with a titanium plate rather than wiring it shut because of nutritional concerns. We actually got to speak with her last Sunday on the phone. She'd only had the tube removed from her throat hours before, and her voice was remarkably strong.

So far, she's stable and healing well. She was released from the hospital Saturday, and even posted a short note on Facebook saying that she won't be on the computer much for a while. She's got a long row to hoe, but I know she can do it!

Thank you all so much for your good thoughts and kind words for both Lisa and Alex. They mean a lot to all of us.

This is a tough post for me to write

2008-04-05T15:09:00.004+08:00

A lot has happened in the last 24-hours and I need to let you know the latest. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for going to Lisa's and Miss Ann's blogs to offer your kind and generous support. If you haven't yet, I hope that you will take a bit of time to go to Lisa's blog, click on the "comment" button, and leave her some words of encouragement -- yes, even though you don't know her.

Here's what she says in the comments section of her blog...

"I want to reply to each and every one of you. I mean that in all sincerity because your comments mean so much. I have been printing them and so far have 43 pages!!! They will keep me strong and remind me what to be grateful for on the days I feel weak and feel like I can’t fight.
I’m grateful for all of you! "

She's an amazing woman who is such an inspiration to all of us.

Here's an update from Lisa:

"... It turns out that I have tumors on my liver and abdomen. This is an aggressive cancer that seems to be spreading fast. I’m inoperable although my only hope may be that Johns Hopkins is the only hospital on the East Coast that may be willing to try surgery to “debulk” the tumor in my abdomen but it’s very risky.
Using chemotherapy at this stage in the game may or may not produce good results..."

An update from Miss Ann (she's hosting the raffle):

"...We’ve reached $3000+! Since people don’t like to insure two time cancer survivors, and since the raffle is still running and even MORE stuff has been donated, which I will post tomorrow, I’m asking for the donations to continue to help with medical expenses and such. As I said yesterday, the raffle might end early depending on what goes on with her at her next doctor appointment sometime next week. I have to pull it abruptly if she needs to go NOW. You guys are the greatest. Seriously. Your thoughtfulness and caring are amazing. Thank you so much..."

Another blog friend, whom I haven't met yet has made the following video. It is beautiful and makes me very proud to be a part of the blogging community.

Now, I need to ask for your love, support, good vibes, and prayers. Our niece, Alex and her boyfriend, Adam, were in a terrible auto accident yesterday in Indiana. It was raining, the country road was slick, and they hit a pothole. I don't know many more details except the truck flipped 7 times. My niece was thrown from the truck and her arm was severed. Adam found her arm, and called for help.

They were both airlifted to Methodist Hospital in Indianapolis. Alex was assessed there and the doctors determined that she could withstand the surgery to reattach her arm. She was then transported to St. Vincent's Hospital. She made it through surgery and her arm's circulation is good, but she has started running a fever and is in critical condition. She also has significant facial injuries, but the swelling has to go down before the doctors can do anything.

It's my understanding that Adam is still at Methodist Hospital in critical condition suffering from internal injuries and hemorrhaging. Unfortunately, I don't know anymore than that at his time.

It is very hard for us to be so far away when something as devastating as this happens. The movers arrived here this morning to begin packing our household goods. Michael packed up a lot of things today and took them to the service apartment. I still have a bunch of forms to fill out, but I'm getting there -- slowly, but surely. I promised Lisa last night that I would stop procrastinating the shitty stuff that I hate to do.

I'm so thankful for technology, the internets, and the beautiful people behind those computer screens. I'm pretty sure I'd be a total basket case right now if I didn't have them. It felt good to talk to Jimmy and my Mom on Skype this morning and to be able to see them. They had been to see Alex, and it was terribly difficult for them to see her little body so battered and broken. So, once again, I thank you for your love and support. It means a lot to me.

Sometimes We Need A Little Help from Friends

2008-04-03T09:11:00.006+08:00

I was going to write about our anniversary evening, but something more important has come up and I need to ask for your help.

I know many of you don't understand this blogging business or the friendships that I've made over the last couple of years. After I started reading blogs, I began to know these people -- probably even better than some of my In Real Life (IRL) friends.

We interact with comments on each other's blogs, Flickr, Twitters, chats, etc. My circle of blogging friends are talented writers, smart as hell, and almost always very funny. I'm always drawn to people who have a sense of humor. When a fellow blogger has a crisis and shares it with us, the blogging community rallies in support. These friendships are real. Connecting with other bloggers all over the world has helped me tremendously while living in Singapore. I'm not so sure I would've adjusted as well as I have without knowing these wonderful people were out there and willing to lend a hand if I needed it.

One of my favorite blog friends is, Lisa, a 41-year old wife and mother of two beautiful daughters. I've been reading her since the beginning of last year. She spent a lot of last year in a coma as well as suffering amnesia resulting from surgery for ovarian cancer. Even though she was in the hospital or at home recovering from March to September, she still managed to graduate from college in October. She went back to work and started working on her Master's degree. She is an amazing woman, honest and forthright.

The following is a quote from Lisa's Promises, Promises post from last November:

Changed jobs
Battled depression
Seen my father on a ventilator after having two heart attacks
Turned 40 and had a mid-life crisis
Battled depression
Had cancer
Survived six surgeries
Was in a coma
Had amnesia
Battled depression
Couldn’t walk
Had numerous other medical complications
Battled depression
My dad had a heart transplant
My mother was diagnosed with cancer
Battled depression
Graduated from school
Started Graduate school
Battled depression
Lost 60 pounds
Battled depression

Yesterday, Lisa wrote that she has cancer again, and it has spread. As I said, when a friend is going through rough times, the blogging community rallies. In this case, Miss Ann Thrope, decided to host a raffle of one of her beautiful afghans to earn enough money for Lisa and her family to go to Disneyworld. Since then, a lot of other bloggers have donated prizes to the raffle too. Check out Miss Ann's post for the additional prizes. All of them are very generous and given from the heart.

This is a cause very near and dear to my heart. I hope you'll consider a donation.
Lisa and her family went through hell last year (that is an understatement if there ever was one). They deserve to have some fun times together without worrying about finances.

A couple of other things I ask of you... go over to Lisa's place and leave a supportive comment. Yes, even if you don't know her. Bloggers love comments and feedback. At a time like this, it is even more important.

If you believe in the power of prayer, I would ask you to keep Lisa and her family in yours. If you don't believe in prayer, please just think good thoughts for them and donate as much money as you can afford.

Thank you, my friends.

High Anxiety

2008-03-27T19:05:00.004+08:00

I started this post last Thursday. I think I might need some Xanax!

I woke up too early this morning... 4:30. I laid in bed for 30 minutes, and decided to get up. No sense lying there with lists running through my head. Lists, lists, lists! You want lists? I'll give you a list of the lists:

List from Big Corporation
List from Moving Company
List from the housing agent
List from the landlord's agent

Then, of course, there are the lists that I make for myself -- several times a day. Just so that I don't get confused. Now, I must say that I'm not as particular about my lists as SJ or KG. They are the Primadonnas of the Listmakers in the Blogiverse! My lists are sloppy, but they work for me, sort of, unless I get distracted by:

My new Macbook that is just so cool and has lots of cool free apps I can download
Google Reader with about 350 blogs that I follow
Jester's BlogTalk radio show (I used to listen to Mr. Fab live, but can't because of the stupid time change), or Hilly's show.
The ever-present Twitter... so much fun to chat with my blog friends.
Crackbook's Scrabulous and Staries games... um, yeah, I'm addicted.

Today's list:

Finish photos and inventory of our possessions
Utilities refund spreadsheet
Start moving us to the service apartment
Wire $$$ to U.S.
Cancel our club membership
Cancel newspaper (again -- he forgot and delivered one today)
Cancel phones
Cancel utilities
Find my glasses! I've looked everywhere, but I can't find them. Sheesh!
Take my husband to dinner at his favorite restaurant for black-pepper crab and celebrate our 30th anniversary.

I'm worn out just looking at that list. My desk is an absolute mess. I straighten things out every evening, but then in the morning it gets completely out of control. No, I need to clarify that -- I am completely out of control!

Things Are Looking UP!

2008-03-24T14:55:00.004+08:00

It pretty much sucks getting older... we fight the battle of the bulge, we fight the cholesterol and the triglycerides, and we lose our hair -- all over! Damnit, that really does a number on the ego. Seriously.

Asians tend to have very sparse or almost non-existent eyebrows and their eyelashes are rather short. Caucasians on the other hand, mostly have eyebrows and eyelashes, but we lose them as we get older.

My friend Jing and I went to get our eyebrows tattooed last month, and I was very pleased with the results. Jimbo and I were talking on Skype the other day, and he said he thought I looked younger. WOO-HOO! Such a good son he is.

I went for a touch-up this past Friday because the tattoos fade after a bit. They're only semi-permanent, unlike regular tattoos. The eyebrows don't hurt that much, but the eyeliner did -- especially the lower lids even though she applied a numbing gel. My eye was twitching so much that Emily (the artist) had to press on my eyes to keep them from twitching! Owww! By the time I left the place, both eyes were completely numb and my vision was blurry. The price we pay, right?

Yeah, well, I'm happy with the results and also happy not to have to draw eyebrows everyday to keep from looking sick. I hate that. They're a bit dark now, but they'll lighten and look more natural in a few days. They also will "do" lips, but since I'm addicted to lipgloss there's really not much reason for me to have mine done.

Everyone at the center is friendly and helpful. The facility is spotlessly clean, the treatment rooms have "spa" music playing. and are quite comfortable. and it smells really nice, too. If you're interested in finding out more...

Derma-Aesthetics Centre
3 Killiney Road #01-03 Winsland House
6836-8388
www.erabelle.com

Saturday evening we met up with Nabil and Shyanne at Pete's Place for dinner, but the first order of the evening was my purchase of a brand new Macbook from Shyanne. Yeah! I'm so pumped. After we gabbed about how much I'm going to love my Mac, we ate dinner which was definitely not on my diet (spaghetti and meatballs), but damn it was yummeh! I ate every bit of it! We went upstairs to mezza9 for drinks and had the best time chatting and laughing. They definitely know how to make a great martini, and Shyanne and Nabil are so nice to hang out with a couple of old people.

My Macbook is simple to use, it's incredible! We just took it out of the box and turned it on. I plugged my mouse in, and it worked without having some pop-up saying that it "Found New Hardware". I.LOVE.IT!

The plans for our repatriation are starting to come together. We're going to move into a service apartment April 1. The packers will start packing our stuff April 5 and we'll hand over this apartment on the 15th. We will take the direct flight from Singapore to Newark April 30 (we leave 4/30 and arrive 4/30 cool, huh?). Then we'll rent a car and drive down to Philadelphia for TequilaCon '08! I've booked a room for us at the Holiday Inn in the Historic District, for May 2 and 3. Unfortunately, we'll have to leave early on the 4th because of our flight to Atlanta. We don't feel like arriving late at night. It's an hour's drive from the airport to the hotel where we'll be staying until our "stuff" arrives.

I am so excited about getting to meet Dave (HAPPY BIRTHDAY!), Jenny, Mr. Fabulous, Shelli, Lisa, Karl, Avitable, Miss Britt, plus a whole bunch of other bloggers I haven't read yet, and with the help and generosity of Avi and Miss Britt.....

Hilly!

If you've got a Paypal account, it would be so nice of you to give 1, 5, or $10. All of us bloggers would appreciate it because it wouldn't be a good TequilaCon without her (as you can see from this photo)

(Photo courtesy Hilly's camera)

I've been reading all of these bloggers for over a year now, and they are friends to me. I am so grateful that my WHH is willing to do this for me. Our 30th wedding anniversary is April 1... his gift to me is to fly us home in Business Class (rather than the back of the bus deal as we're accustomed) and attending TequilaCon '08 in Philly.

With all of the travel I've done over the years, I've never been to Philadelphia before! This trip is going to be a great incentive for me to do the inventory, move to the service apartment, box up all of our important documents and bills, give away appliances we can't use in the U.S., etc. Moving is always a huge disruption in our lives, but moving overseas is even more complicated. It's worth it, but it still takes a toll.

I'm glad that I'll get to meet everyone at TequilaCon AND get to see our family and friends. That's what life is all about!

The Simple Life -- A Guest Post by An Expat

2008-03-17T15:13:00.004+08:00

The Simple Life

Not long ago I was asked to articulate on the easy life of being an expatriate in Singapore. This seemed like a simple enough request. What’s not to like for heaven sakes?:

o Free room and board during my expatriation

o All utilities paid by my company

o My house in the US fully under the management of a third party provider, including but not limited to, house payment, real estate taxes, lawn service, etc.

o Salary adjusted to the region, i.e. US gross pay, net of all taxes, car payments, house payments, utilities, and then adjusted to the local currency.

o Club Dues to be equal to the Dutch Club. This is not a country club kind of place, but a club for expatriates of the various countries to be with people from their same region of the world. Being a Dutch company, the rate at the Dutch club is the lowest one can get. If you want to join the British Club or the American Club one must ante up for the difference at your own expense.

o 1 set of round trip tickets back to the US on an annual basis to say hello to loved ones. (coach class) Flight time is 25+ hours from door to door.

I mean really, what more could a couple ask for? “Piece of cake” as my father used to say. Living the High Life!

What often slips through the corporate crack are a few of the “intangibles” of being overseas:

o Medical bills are paid by cash only, with reimbursement only coming after painstaking attention to detail and the patience of Job as one waits to see if the Insurance Company actually accepts and pays according to the rules. Nothing like having $15k owed one for almost 9 months.

o A 65-page Federal Income tax submission that only happens 2 years after the filing date.

o The inability to communicate “live” with anyone in the US during a normal business day. At best, one is 12-13 hours ahead based on Daylight Savings Time. “Our office hours are from 9am to 7pm Eastern Standard Time.” That effectively equates to 10pm to 8am Singapore time to deal with the US.

o An expat agreement does not, by its sheer nature, guarantee one a job upon the end of the assignment. “We will do our very best to place you in a similar position as you have today, but if we are unsuccessful, then we promise to get you and your belongings back to the US.” Whoa Fucking Nellie -- thanks for asking me to go abroad and looking after my best interests at the end of the day!

o Having family and friends tell you how much they will enjoy coming to Singapore often to visit. (plan 1 visit per year from no more than 1 person)

o As the dollar goes south faster than a swarm of ducks in the fall, one’s “take-home pay” goes down equally fast. Almost 2-1 when you arrive, almost 1-1 when you leave.

o “We will be moving our corporate office shortly after your return, so please be prepared to move within 1 year of your relocation.”

Would I change a single decision or a single minute of my agreement to accept this expat assignment.. Hell No…!!!!!

o I am emotionally richer for the experience. My wife and I operate on the simple philosophy that we will never wonder “what if we had tried this or that.” We do it with the full knowledge that if we don’t like it, we will just do something else.

o The people we have met and the friends we have made here are both “life-long and everlasting.” Who would ever imagine that you would meet up with someone who grew up but 40 miles from your own small home town in Illinois. I recently asked this person where they were from. Response was pretty standard, “I grew up near Chicago.” I say “Oh really, whereabouts?” “Well, actually I grew up in a small town in southern Illinois but no one would recognize the place so I just say Chicago.” I say, “And that place would be?” Lo and behold, this person, half a world away, grew up just 40 miles from my own very small town of 4500 people in Illinois. Small world indeed.

o The cultural diversity of Singapore has truly taught me the meaning that “all men are created equal.” Everybody, regardless of race or religion, worries about paying their bills, global warming, Iraq, Iran, terrorism, and the perils of global unrest.

o We have been truly blessed (and I am not a real religious guy at the end of the day) to have had the opportunity to experience life in a different place and time.

So, my simple advice to those pondering an opportunity to explore the world, at what is effectively your company’s expense, is to “just do it.” You will be far richer for the experience than money can ever buy..!

Yours Truly,

An Expat

News Flash!!!

2008-03-10T22:43:00.006+08:00

I've been a very bad blogger the last couple of weeks. I just wasn't in much of a mood to write. That doesn't mean that nothing interesting has happened though.

1. This guy, Mas Selamat, is a very "wily" character, as Minister Mentor Lee Kwan Yew referred to him, escaped from the Whitley Road Detention Center almost two weeks ago. He is the leader of of the notorious Jemaah Islamiyah terrorist group. Although the government has conducted extensive searches, he remains at large.

Photo from Interpol website

2. In January the Singapore goverment announced the detention of 13 terrorist suspects for suspicious activity under the Internal Security Act. The Straits Times also reported that many suspects are "self-radicalised" even though the government does their best to block terrorist websites.

3. I believe that the government's efforts to keep Singapore secure has also caused the blocking of several non-terrorist websites which would include Stickam. They don't need jihadists chatting online and conspiring to blow something up. Therefore, I've removed my Stickam from this blog. I'll put it back up when I start my new blog.

4. The jack-hammering of Ardmore Point has still not resumed. I hear workers, but no jack-hammering and that makes me very happy. I hope it remains this way until we move out of this place.

5. I just talked to the mover guy, and he will have people here to begin packing April 5. After everything is packed, I'll "hand-over" the keys to the agent. Then, we'll move into a serviced apartment until April 30.

6. Next, the plan is to take the direct flight to Newark stay the night, and then go to Philadelphia for TequilaCon2008! at the North Bowl Lounge 'n Lanes. My WHH has agreed to attend too! Yippeeee! I'm so excited!

7. After our fun-filled adventures meeting a whole bunch of really cool and famous blogger friends, we'll fly to Atlanta and move back into our house.

My Name is Happy

2008-02-24T16:55:00.004+08:00

After running across Geeky Tai-Tai's blog a week ago, and after an exchange of emails, she asked me if I would guest blog on my latest experience with Americans.

Little did I know, one fateful evening a couple of weeks ago, that I was about to encounter a pair of true USA small town Midwestern boys. Okay, perhaps “boys” is an inappropriate description of two brothers 54 and 56 years old, but heavens, I swear those men were as shy as a pair of 15-year old school boys fondling their first Playboy.

Our karaoke business would be described as a “typical” Asian business experience. Businessmen in Asia Pacific work terribly long and hard during the day, and need to relax in the evenings, complete with a level of “de-coupling” of one’s personal life versus one’s business life. Entertaining business associates is a fundamental requirement to doing business in Asia. In the US, they talk about working hard and playing hard. In my line of work, playing hard takes on a brand new meaning for our gentlemen customers.

When I walked into the karaoke room that evening with my fellow associates, I saw in front of me 10 men, each looking for a “partner” for the next couple of hours. My Madam then matched us up with the business man that she felt would be the best match. I would never have guessed that inside the comfort of our plush room were two Americans ripe for the picking. My friend, Jana and I were chosen to sit next to Ray and Al. Jana had only arrived in Singapore one month earlier. She showed Ray her green card and said she was here to learn English. Yea right…! But hey, it’s a great lead in line and the men suck it up big time.

The evening with my assigned karaoke partner Al, (we will call him Al to protect all involved) started out innocently enough. His brother, Ray, has been stationed in Singapore for 3+ years to date, and was planning to head back to the US later this year. Al had decided to visit him prior to his final departure. Ray had taken him earlier in the evening for a Chinese New Year dinner sponsored by one of Ray’s suppliers. There were about 10 of Ray’s colleagues at the dinner plus 4 people from the supplier. The supplier had also arranged the after-dinner entertainment at our establishment.

Al went on to describe for me his visits to Fort Siloso, the Underwater Aquarium, the Monkey Death March, Boat Quay, Clarke Quay, and certainly last but not least, the Four Floors of Whores. In our line of business, we find this title to be less than flattering, but history does not allow us to change perceptional thinking as easily as one might think.

It would probably be good to describe our karaoke room. Al’s version, as explained to me later, was the Holiday Inn off Interstate 55, in the bar, with a microphone and small television on a roll away cart, with drunk people singing nasty country songs.

Our room is 20 x 30 square feet. We have deep plush couches instead of bar stools. Our television is an overhead LCD projector that lights up a 6 ft screen, conveniently tucked into a wall unit with 2 - 32” LCD’s on either side. Sound is pumped throughout the room with studio quality. Let’s be clear, this is no shit-hole, it’s our office and we keep it nice and tidy.

So here we are, sitting with our appointed dates and beginning to settle in for the pre-ordered 2 hours of entertainment. One of the ladies cranked up the karaoke machine and we had our first volunteer belting away at a local favorite.

Al seemed a bit nervous, making small talk with me as stated above, smiling, but clearly unsure what this was all about. His brother Ray was equally coming to grips with this new style of karaoke. Jana and I passed a glancing eye as we both tried to size up our prey.

After 10 minutes Al looks over at Ray and says “I need to talk to you”. Ray says “Okay, can do.” Two minutes pass and Al again looks over at Ray, voice now slightly raised and says “No, I really need to talk to you!”

In a flash the brothers are up off the couch and headed outside for a conversation. Jana and I just looked at each other and thought maybe the brothers were plotting their next moves on us, hoping to start with this, move to that, and end up with something else. We like it when the men take charge as opposed to sit there like wimps with puppy dog faces.

I can only imagine the discussion they were having, but I suspect that it went something like this:

Al: “Ray, what’s going on here?”

Ray: “Shit I don’t know, I’ve never done this before either. Let’s just relax and when our host gets here I can check with him and get the scoop.”

There was probably a moment where Al thought that his brother had set him up for this.

Al: “No really, Jesus, this is freaking me out. All I can see is my wife’s face in my head!”

Ray: “Okay, okay, as soon as our host gets here I’ll explain to him that we need to shorten the evening considerably and we’ll catch a cab back to my place.”

Poor Ray was struggling with a weird stomach virus he picked up on a recent trip to Bangalore, so this whole conversation is taking place while he’s on the crapper doing courtesy flushes to keep from really sending his brother over the edge.

The boys finally returned from their discussion to take their assigned seats next to Jana and me. We settled in with a couple of beers along with a whiskey and water. It is customary for us to sit close to our companions, lock arms with them, and gently pat their legs to reassure them that they are in good and capable hands. Ray was wearing jeans and Al was wearing shorts. This gave Al the advantage over his brother, as Al was allowed to feel the painstaking work we ladies go through to have smooth and silky legs. His were manly legs with the right amount of leg hair to tickle my outer thigh as we chatted. I could sense a good time was on the horizon.

Al turns to his left and has a brief discussion with one of Ray’s work colleagues sitting on the other side of him. I’m not sure exactly the gist of the conversation, but I did hear Ray’s colleague turn to look at Al with a smile on his face and say, “What happens in Singapore, stays in Singapore.”

It was at that very moment that I began to explore the titillating area just under the end of Al’s beige shorts. As if being shot out of a cannon, he quickly looked over at Ray and said, “I gotta go!”

Ray, trying to reassure his brother that all would be cool when the host arrived, responded with “Okay, okay.”

Apparently Al was not sure that Ray heard him, so he repeated himself, only this time a bit louder, “No you don’t understand, I need to go and I need to go, right now!”

With that Al stands up and tells Ray “Look, I can catch a cab and you can stay, but I gotta go.”

Ray, sensing the urgency of the situation and the sheer panic in his brother’s voice, extracts himself from Jana’s body press and gets up off the couch to say to his brother. “Clear, let’s go, it’s no big deal.” With that, Ray turns to his fellow colleagues and apologizes that he and Al must go now, please continue with your evening, enjoy yourselves and he would see them tomorrow at work.

If there were a world record for sitting comfortably beside a companion one minute and actually crossing a 30ft room and out the door the next, then Al would have shattered that sucker. Jana and I were almost sucked out of the room by the vacuum created by the two brothers’ exit. Poor Ray didn’t even get to finish his beer. Side-note: One of his work colleagues told Jana and I later that this was paramount to a mortal sin, punishable by spending time with his wife while she got a pedicure and manicure. Ray did not strike me as a pedicure kind of guy, so this truly must have been a devastating moment for him.

What happened next is only hearsay from a brief encounter with one of Ray’s colleagues about 2 weeks later. Story has it that when Ray and Al got back to Ray’s place, Ray’s wife, Lynn, took one look at Al and said, “Are you okay?” It seems that Lynn has seen this look before on Ray, and can always tell when something’s not right.

Anyway, the first words out of Al’s mouth were “where’s the #@$^ing Vodka, I need a drink and I need it now!” After quickly downing a vodka on the rocks, lots of olives, with a splash of ice, Al spilled his guts. It was only after 3-4 of these babies did the blood begin to flow back into Al’s face. In the end, Al made it safely home to his lovely wife with a whole slew of stories to tell his golfing buddies.

The moral of this story is as follows: If anyone comes to Singapore and is asked to go to a Karaoke Bar for a few drinks and some laughs, please call Al before you say yes. This quick phone call (1-800-dorfwad) will save you from being traumatized by the subtle differences between a Singapore karaoke bar and an Illinois karaoke bar….and will allow Jana and me to make a living.

My name is Happy, and my friend’s name is Jana. Next time one of you boys comes to town, call us -- we'll show you a fun time at a real karaoke bar!

MacRitchie Reservoir and a Monkey Death March

2008-02-20T21:23:00.007+08:00

MacRitchie Reservoir

So, let's see... where'd I leave off? Oh yeah, the ever so sultry sounds of a Geeky's saxy serenade?

Let's move on... shall we?

I suggested that we go to MacRitchie Reservoir since I still hadn't been there after living here 3 years. I promised the guys that Mom, Dad, and Mary had seen LOTS of monkeys on their trek around the reservoir. I made certain that we had plenty of cold water and our cellphones to call for a taxi just in case we couldn't hail one.

The reservoir is beautiful, and jungle-y after the entrance. I was really excited about the prospect of seeing monkeys in the wild. Especially, since I had the WHH and the WH-BIL (Way-Hot Husband and Way-Hot Brother-in-Law) to protect me from the gangs of notoriously bad monkeys -- made bad by very stupid people who feed them!

The government has raised the fine from $250 to $500, yet STUPID people continue to feed the monkeys.

When we first entered the park, we saw people resting on the park benches. A couple asked us about the Presidential election and our feelings about GWB. We said, essentially, that he's an ass, and they most heartily agreed. Then, I think WH-BIL asked about the monkeys, and they replied, "Oh, well, you're too late. They only come out at feeding times in the mornings and evenings."

Oops! I got "the look", but I remained optimistic. We were going to see monkeys and we were going to have fun, dammit! (Didn't your parents say that to you on family outings?)

We walked along the water's edge for an interminable amount of time. I had to stop to wipe the perspiration from my eyes -- they burned! We all had some water to drink and we enjoyed the breeze wafting off the water. It was about then, that I thought to check to see what my pedometer reading was (you know, for my Virtual Walk), and it only showed 1.25km -- this most definitely did not sync with the signs posted! That's when I realized that my pedometer was a POS and I've been cheated for the last 3 weeks -- whatever.

We started back on our trek, and the guys were coming up with a new game-plan to get the hell out of the park. There weren't any damn monkeys, and they'd had enough exercise for the day. It was time for some cold beer.

Suddenly Skip noticed movement and turned back to tell us to be still...

Click to enlarge and be sure to look closely as monkeys are very good at camouflage

Did you see the monkeys?

We Had a Very SPECIAL Visitor!

2008-02-18T19:12:00.004+08:00

Skip & Cheese Lobster at River Quay Seafood in Boat Quay

Remember those big-ass storms in the Midwest the week before last? Well, those stupid storms kept my favorite brother-in-law, Skip, from making his flight to Newark! Stupid storms. He was able to make it the next day, cutting his visit short by one day.

There's something you need to know... no matter how much my BIL is like his dad, he was not born a travellin' man! This is a big trip for anyone, but for someone who's not a "travellin' man"? Ummm, it's a very scary proposition!

However, he arrived safely from Singapore Airlines (he was impressed with the "care" bestowed upon passengers). Once he got to our place, we proceeded to ply him with several Stella Artois' and he ate the snacks that he 'stole' from SIA (HAH!)

He slept a while and then we took him out for a walk along Orchard Road. I'm not sure (I wasn't keeping notes -- he was), but I think we all needed a shower after that. GAH! It's humid here, but it's so good for the skin!

Mike & Skip at Ngee Ann City

We decided on dinner at our fav place, River Quay Seafood, in Boat Quay. As we were walking "The Gauntlet", we could hear drummers up ahead...

We watched and listened, and then we ate...

There's more to come, because I'm pretty sure I serenaded WHH and BIL for several hours one night with my broken saxophone! Yeah, we had quite a good time!

No, I Did Not Get the T-Shirt Dammit!

2008-02-09T22:33:00.000+08:00

I haven't posted all week because I've been BUSY, so I'm just going to tell you now. Monday night we went to see The Police, and OMG they were amazing! Even though we were sitting at the side of the stage the seats were pretty damn close, close enough that Sting could see me gazing at his HOTNESS and smiled at ME because you know I'm cool and all.

OK, the quality of my video sucks, but it's better than nothing especially since I didn't get the damn t-shirt this time. Oh yeah, the dork in front of me drove me batty with his stupid hands in the air most of the concert! The nerve of some people, I tell ya!

OMG! I've Got Stuff to Write About!

2008-02-05T07:33:00.000+08:00

First off, I must apologize to my fellow bloggers for my belatedness in reading your blogs. There are thousands of posts in my Google Reader! Some people do the "Mark all as read" thing, but I just can't bring myself to do it. To me, it feels as if I'm killing someone. If someone felt strongly enough to write, then should I really destroy it? Yeah, I'm goofy that way.

It's been very quiet around here since last Wednesday, but not in a good way. I should have blogged about it then, but I was too lazy or whatever. Around 6 in the evening, I heard a big boom, but that's not unusual with demolition. After the big boom, there was a lot of screaming and shouting. A few minutes later, I heard SIRENS!

Singapore is quiet as far as emergency vehicles are concerned, unlike the U.S. In the 3 years I've lived here, I've heard two vehicles with sirens and it was when Bush was here for a visit. It only happened once while he was here, and I'm not sure why (I'd like to say something snarky here, but it wouldn't be prudent at this juncture).

The siren caught my attention and I went to the kitchen window to see what was happening. I saw a big red vehicle (not like our fire trucks) marked "Civil Defence" and it stopped just past our building. I really thought that maybe someone had been run over by a taxi or something and decided I didn't want to pursue it further since emergency personnel were on the scene (and I don't need to see another dead body).

By Friday, it was still quiet next door. As I was perusing the morning paper, I saw a headline "3 deaths at demolition worksites in past 6 months". I scanned it at first, but then I saw Ardmore Point condo, and I had to go back to the beginning. I was planning to link this, but The Straits Times is being stubborn about "free" articles online. In a nutshell, a "49-year old foreman was crushed to death by a 30kg concrete slab". A stop-work order was issued until a complete investigation can be completed. Wednesday is Chinese New Year's Eve, so I don't see much demolition going on until after the 16th when the New Year's celebration is completed.

Chinese New Year is akin to our Christmahanukwanzakaakah, so this man's family will not be having a "happy new year". All of the men who work for that company will not be earning $$$ for their families either. It is deadly quiet next door, and I feel terrible about it.

Neil's "The Great Interview Experiment" Part II

2008-02-03T00:20:00.000+08:00

Curiosity Killer was the commenter before me on Neil's blog. According to Neil's rules, she interviewed me. I hope my answers to bore you to death!

1. How long have you been blogging?

I started blogging just after we moved to Singapore in 2004. I'd only read about it before, but I thought it would be a good way to keep our family and friends filled in on our life here.

2. How do you feel blogging has added to your life?

It has made me take the time to document our life here. If I hadn't started blogging I know that we would forget a lot of our experiences, and that would be a shame

3. Do you find yourself connecting more or less with others?

I read quite a number of blogs and have "met" a lot of bloggers -- virtually, and I consider them as friends. When others share so much of themselves on their blog, it is impossible for me not to feel connected. I've cried many times when a blogging friend is hurting. The first time it happened, my husband looked at me with such a concerned look on his face, that I'm pretty sure he worried about my sanity! Now he knows these blogging friends because I share stories with him, or I'll have him read something I find hilarious.

4. Where are places you've lived in besides Singapore?

I was born in Indianapolis and lived there until I was 18, when I moved to Carlinville, IL (July 4th 1976). I'd fallen madly in love with my husband my senior year in high school when he was attending ITT Tech to become a TV repairman. Once he graduated, he moved back to Carlinville. We would visit each other every other month or so. On one visit, his brother said, "Why don't you just move here and get a job? Then you can decide if you're really in love." It wasn't long before I packed up all of my earthly possessions into my 1969 VW Beetle and settled into "The Valley" apartment owned by Michael's parents. My rent was $60 a month! We married April 1, 1978 and started Brooks TV Sales & Service not long after.

Eventually, my husband's talent and charm came to the attention of the corporate world, and he was offered a job in Skokie, IL. We moved there in 1981 and then our oldest son, Jim, was born in 1982, then Patrick in 1985. Just after Patrick was born a new opportunity arose for my husband's career, and we moved to Orange County, CA. Life was tough because we'd decided that I would be a stay-at-home mom. OMG! We were poor, but we had some really good times there and met life-long friends.

Four years later, the company that Michael worked for before wanted him back. This gave us the opportunity to move a bit closer to our families in the Midwest. In 1989 we moved to Morristown, TN. We lived there (and the boys grew up there) until 1998 when Michael was promoted and we moved to Mahopac, NY.

We loved New York and even went to watch the ball drop in Times Square New Year's Eve. We didn't make it the entire night because it was freezing and we all had to pee! I honestly do not know how all of those people relieve themselves because the restaurants and businesses make their toilets off-limits.

Corporate changes brought another move into our lives. For almost 2 years Michael "commuted" from Knoxville TN to New York, and then from Knoxville to Atlanta where the boys and I had moved in August of 2000. The opportunity for us to live in Singapore arose in 2004. I was reluctant at first, but once I visited I was sure that I would love living here, and I do!

5. Which one of these places do you enjoy living most?

That is a very good question, and one that has been asked of us many times. Each place I've lived has had plenty to enjoy, but there are drawbacks too. I tend to prefer city-living and Michael wants to live on a lake somewhere so that he can fish the way he could in Morristown, TN. I love the peace and quiet of living in a small-ish town, but I love all of the entertainment/restaurant/cultural options of living in a city. How's that for not really answering your question?

6. What is your favorite thing about Singapore? (feel free to name up to 3 things... weather... shopping... buildings... etc.)

How about "all of the above"? It is hot and humid here and the rainy season can be tiresome, but I like the warm weather. I'm not much of a shopper really. It is more of a chore for me, but I do love Takashimaya! Even though Singapore has only been a "country" for 47 years, there's a lot of history here. I love history! It's too bad that so many of the old buildings have been razed over the years.

My very favorite place is the Botanic Gardens. They lie in the very heart of the city, but it is beautiful and relatively quiet. Yes, there are usually a lot of tourists, but there are quiet areas and I love to walk there. I can barely hear the jack-hammers!

7. You mentioned you may not stay in Singapore anymore... why is that?

Michael's initial expat assignment ended December 2007, but it was extended to the end of 2008. Then, there were corporate changes and so now we will be repatriating probably in April, the where is still uncertain.

8. If you can be anywhere in this world, where would you be?

Walking on a sandy beach with my husband.

9. What are the most memorable things for you last year in Singapore 2007?

Probably, when our niece visited and then we flew up to Berjaya Resort in Langkawi. That was awesome!

10. What is the happiest moment that you would carry with you always?

This is a tough one. I'm lucky enough to have several... the day I married my husband and when our sons were born. While we've been in Singapore, our "boys" have become men. They've become responsible and independent of us. That is the most important thing we could ever accomplish in our life.

EDIT: CK asked an additional question in the comments. She suggested that I add it to the interview...

11. If you move away (back to U.S. or elsewhere), would you be changing your blog address too?

Yes, I think I'd like to start a new blog. My friend, Cristina, suggested "A Geeky Tai-Tai in America". I think that's a perfect title. I just don't know which platform I'd use -- WordPress, Expression Engine, TypePad? I'd really like it if one of my blogging friends could design a new template for me. Maybe I should have a contest or something!

I'm beginning to look forward to repatriating, but I know it's not going to be an easy transition. I think blogging will help me get through the tough times.

Thank you Curiosity Killer for your great questions!

Neil's "The Great Interview Experiment"

2008-01-25T20:21:00.000+08:00

Neil has the coolest ideas... the Annual Arts & Crafts Fair, the Holiday Concert, and now, his The Great Interview Experiment.

I hadn't met Tatiana before and since her blog is so new, I decided to go back to the beginning and read it in its entirety. I wanted to get a "feel" for her personality and writing style. After reading just a few posts, I realized she has a great sense of humor.

Without further ado, I bring you my interview with Tatiana...

1. Your good friend has been blogging for a number of years. What is it that inspired you to start your blog just this past October?

Yes, Karel initially got me into the idea that I could blog. I actually had two blogs before this- one while I studied abroad in Australia and one during my senior year of college. But they were more of the 'this is what I had for lunch today' kind of blog. Though, to be fair, I did have kangaroo in Australia, which is much more exciting that pb&j!

2. I like the way you mix-it up with your fun sense of humor. Yet, you also talk about the challenges you face -- both as a graduate student and personally. Do you regret that your blog is no longer anonymous?

Sometimes. I do like the fact that many of my friends and family read my blog (hello, friends and family!). We talk about it in the 'real world'. A lot of the things that I post about are things that happen to me or that I talk about with friends, so even if the blog didn't have my name on it, they would be able to figure things out.

But I also don't talk about a lot of personal things that I would like to write about. Moving back home for school shifted a lot of things in my life but since I know a lot of my readers and my name is all over the place, I don't share those things online. I am lucky to have good friends to talk to about recent life events, but I have been contemplating a personal site where I could just spew out all the other thoughts running through my mind. I've never been terribly good about keeping a journal but if I don't hold myself to writing in it everyday, I may pick that up again. Besides, I think that I've set the tone for my site and it is usually pretty upbeat.

3. You've titled this particular blog "Rizado". Where did that come from?

Rizado means curly in Spanish. I have curly hair and am half Colombian.

4. Your studies have taken you from private Catholic school in Maryland, to England, Australia, and Boston. What was the most important thing you learned from each place?

Oh man- well, Catholic high school was also all girls, so I feel that contributed a great deal to my outspokenness. As far as being from Maryland, I have a LOT of state pride. I learned how to open a crab, take the metro, roll my kilt, and hate humidity.

I was in England for seventh grade, where I learned a lot about Henry VIII's wives- seriously, they were my obsession for awhile. I loved just the sheer amount of built history in England. Coming from the US where things over 100 years old are considered very historic, I was blown away, walking through old churches and cemeteries that dated back hundreds of years.

Australia was an amazing experience. I would go back in a heartbeat, if someone could guarantee no turbulence. There, I was more flexible about my time and not so rigid about my scheduling- something that I've defiantly fallen back into now.

As for Boston, I learned the importance of layers and layers of cold weather gear.

5. You mentioned that even though you were raised Catholic, if you had your choice you would become a Quaker. Yet, in another entry you say that you feel you're agnostic. Do you feel that you're in a state of flux at this point in your life?

Yes, totally. I said I would become Quaker if I had to raise my children in some sort of religion, if my husband didn't feel strongly about his own. I do feel that there is a g/God, I'm just not sure which organized religion I can get behind.

6. Once you've completed your studies, what is your dream job?

Oh... dream job. I would love to work for an exhibition consulting firm that works with various museums to help them research, write, and put up exhibits. That way, I could work with a variety of different museums, since I enjoy so many. There aren't too many of these firms floating around, so I will probably end up doing in house exhibits for a larger museum- also, totally cool with me.

7. You seem to be a traditional-values type of woman. Let's say you've landed that dream job and you're loving it. Then one day, you realize that you've met the love of your life who must move to Abu Dhabi (or some other remote locale). Would you give up the career that you've worked so long and hard to achieve for someone else's aspirations?

Whoa. This is a total cop out, but I don't know. Part of me wants to think that after all the time I put into getting my degree and landing my ideal job would make me want to stay put. But, I know myself and am a total romantic and sucker for love, so I would probably go. Though if I did go, I would want to work once I got out there. But again, I don't know until I'm in the situation. And the location probably matters as much as the man!

8. You've mentioned that you would love to have children. How many would be ideal for you and would you want to be a stay-at-home mom or stay on your career path?

Children are so far away in my mind, but yes, I do want them. I am a huge wimp, so I may be only able to have one. I think I would like 2-4. I would most likely stay at home while they are tiny babies and then work part time until they go to school. Though, like #7, I just don't know. I may want to be with them all the time or I might go crazy without serious and daily adult interaction.

9. I think it's very cool that you've at least stopped in Singapore on your way to Australia, and I'm currently living here (not much longer, though *sigh*). Let's pretend that money is plentiful and you can travel anywhere. What are your dream destinations?

So many! Well, I defiantly want to go back to Australia and New Zealand. Ireland because my father's family is from there. I've always wanted to go to Vienna because John Irving writes about it in so many of his books. Prague. Greece. Back to Italy and Spain. Egypt. Madagascar. Canada (I've never gone!). All the 50 states. Colombia, specifically Cartagena. Brazil. France. Sweden. India and China, though I would have to avoid major cities due to my intense dislike of being jostled. Virgin Islands. Cayman Islands. Pretty much any balmy island.

10. You've chosen not to you capitalizations on your blog. I am "kinda old". Would you reconsider using them in the future?

I do capitalize in my correspondence and all formal writing. I do capitalize when I write with a pen. But I don't on my blog out of habit. I tend to have a lot to say- A LOT- and ever since I started using AIM to talk to my friends, I have left capital letters in the dust. I just can't be slowed down by the shift key! It is something I've transfered to my blog. I also think it makes the blog, overall, more lax and less formal. The funny thing is I am a HUGE stickler for correct grammar.

This entire exercise was fun for me because you're just getting started and we're on the "downside" of the bell curve, but we take that to mean that we're in the enjoyment phase. We don't have to prove ourselves anymore, we can do whatever the hell it is we want (to a certain extent).

Oh, one more question please.... How did you find Neil's blog?

I can't remember! I know it was through a link from someone else's blog but I can't for the life of me recall.

Thank you, Neil, for sharing your creative ideas; this has been a lot of fun for me! And, thank you to Tatiana for answering my questions.