Meri Zindagi~~~~Sikh By Birth, Khalsa By Nature

Happenings..

2009-07-02T23:04:00.004-07:00

Its been awhile now since my last post which i guess was due to my participation in a singtel blog contest.

So much has happened within this 2 weeks. Had a beautiful long drive to Downtown Vancouver with my lovely aunts and even had our brunch at a delicious restaurant named Naam. I know,from the name you might be thinking, its just another Indian restaurant. But you know what, it wasn't. It was owned by a white guy and it was his idea to create a fusion between Indian food and western delights. And what a fusion he created!

Next we headed towards a nice drive into UBC Campus area and out towards Robson St(Orchard Road of Vancouver). This street is about i think 5km long and has every brand shop you could think off. It was kind of relaxing just taking a long walk and appreciating everything around me. After the beautiful walk, we headed home and that was basically my weekend which ended with a self realisation walk.

The day before this downtown outing, i had sent my car to the workshop for a brand new performance muffler upgrade for my beloved BMW... Now, the car makes head turns every single time...Next up of the list of modifications is the brakes set and a new set of Rims and tires...

Alright my faithful readers, i will update more often, stay tuned for the next weekend update or happenings...

Places where i wish there was Internet Connection

2009-06-17T13:19:00.003-07:00

Hmm..there are a number of places where having the availability of the internet would be so useful..

1.Train...
Having the internet connection on the train would make last minute work or surfing possible!! Most of us have the problem of doing last minute stuff at some point in our lives and to be able to do it on the go would help alot!!

2. The next place that i would love to have internet connection would have to be the beach. The beach, for me has to be the most peaceful place, where you can just go to relax and be free of your worries... Having the internet connection there would just make it more fun as it would allow me to get my thoughts or anything that would come to my mind down straight to my blog rather than me having to remember the experience and the coming home to publish it on my blog...

For me i think these are the 2 most places that i would really love to have the internet connection...

“Live Life Online Anywhere with SingTel BroadBand on Mobile Youth Plan!

Angels & Demons

2009-06-06T19:24:00.006-07:00

Hmm, doesn't the title seem familiar to everyone, don't we look at everyone else as Angels and demons, a thought to ponder...
Anyways, the movie by Ron Howard from the serial "Happy Days", was a very good summarised version of Dan Brown's Book. The Movie, as expected has many twist and turns and also what i believe opened alot of minds to question. To Question the very foundation of each and every religion is build on, not only Christianity. I know i maybe sounding very radical, but think about it, all these movies make us wonder , on what grounds was our religion created and what other hidden mysteries are there...

Ps: A movie worth watching!!

Is blood really thicker than water?

2009-06-05T11:02:00.003-07:00

I guess everyone would have heard this saying at one point or another in their lives.
But is it really true?
One may argue that most of the time that those that leave you in the hanging are your relatives and family and the people that hold on tight to you are the friends and loved ones that really cherish you...
To me, I've seen so many different kinds of family and friends, relatives that hurt you but don't realise it or some even do it intentionally..and friends that have back stabbed me till i bled out of hurt...But the Almighty up above has been kind to me...
Since young, I've always believed in this saying that god didn't send you alone to this world cause he knew we couldn't take care of ourselves. Its true that all life needs is a beautiful partner who would support you and understand you...And Guruji send me an angel....Inderjeet Kaur...

Busy, Busy,Busy...

2009-06-04T00:27:00.001-07:00

Everyday ,Waking up and the first thought that comes to mind is "when is this semester gonna end!!!" My mind, body and soul has been screaming for a break. Like you know, the spa and resort getaway or just to be able to chill on the beach without worrying about school and basically life as a whole.
And just to reaffirm this theory of me needing a break, my body gave in to food poisoning or something like a stomach flu... It was bad and i guess i lost like 3 to 5 kgs!!!
To everyone out there, eat home-cooked food!!!! ...

Divine Experience

2009-05-18T00:49:00.005-07:00

Yesterday, after a day of watching Man Utd lifting the EPL Title for the 18th time and also spending a relaxing day and a half at my uncle's place, I had an opportunity to be present at the Vancouver Annual AKJ Smaagam. It was held at Khalsa School which is a school that not only teaches normal subjects but also the religious aspects of Sikhism.

Being at this Smaagam, for me, was a kind of life-changing experience. It was like the whole sangat was connected to Guruji together, as a whole. Being there and seeing the next generation and the generation after that, with full fate and devotion to their religion was something that made me proud of being a Sikh.

It's funny that Sikhs all over the world are different. Different in their level of faith or devotion to Sikhi and also just on the whole. Like for for an example, when we have a rehansabhi in Singapore, you only see a handful of sangat left after midnight, that when Singapore was still having New Year celebrations rehansabhi. But here, IT TOTALLY DIFFERENT!! Kids as old as 3-4 years were still there and singing kirtan all the way till the next day morning.
Think about it!
What radical changes has affected the sangat to reduce themselves from connecting to their Guru?

Happy Mother's Day

2009-05-10T23:51:00.002-07:00

Wishing All Mothers Around the World, Happy Mother's Day!!

Spring Break ends...

2009-05-02T13:05:00.003-07:00

Spring Break is coming to an end and there goes my few weeks of break and enjoyment... Next up, back to books and a new and fresh semester awaits...
*how i wished it was longer!!*

You know guys, I've always wondered, do we actually have control of our own destiny or do we just choose to leave it to the Almighty's hands.
I sincerely believe that each and everyone of us has the capability to change and to make our desire destiny come true. It's just whether we want it bad enough or not. So far my life has presented me with many challenges that has either altered my destiny or make me even more determined in my desire destiny/future...

Take a moment in your life and ask yourself, is this the destiny/future that you truly want for yourself, and if its not CHANGE IT!!! Be determined and even the God will help you in it...

till next time..

My LAtest Toy...

2009-04-26T23:18:00.005-07:00

Recently i had the pleasure and joy of my parents coming all the way from Singapore to visit me and to see how's the lifestyle here. Basically to check up on me...But this brought upon a good opportunity to show my dad, what i was gonna use my army savings on...A BMW 318ti!!

I was basically fed up with the transport system here, Singapore's is way way better!!!I just need my set of wheels!!

Below are pics of my Baby!!

Having Parents is a blessing in everyother way....

2009-04-24T00:05:00.006-07:00

Most of us would have done this mistake of taking our parents for granted... but you would only really realise their importance when they are away from you and don't provide the comfort you usually get when they are around.....

It hit me hard here for the first couple of months, staying away from my parents for the first time and for a long time. I didn't have the fun of asking my dad, "can i have money for whatever" or just irritating them as what i always did....

Living away from my parents has its benefits and loses...but most importantly made me appreciate my parents a lot, for whatever they have done, provided and supported me in....

I LOVE YOU MOM AND DAD!!!!!

Below are a couple of pics of their visit here to Vancouver, Canada...

At the Vesakhi Nagar Kirtan...

At Whistler...2010 Olympic venue....

Happy Vesakhi

2009-04-13T22:50:00.005-07:00

Wishing every Sikh , a very Happy Vesakhi!!! May GuruJi Bless you with abundance of happiness and love....Just thought i share with my readers about the experience i had at the Nagar Kirtan/ Khalsa Day Parade in Surrey....

The most Beautiful and passionate parade or nagar kirtan I've ever seen...Everyone, from the old to the young, were so proud to be a Sikh as the paraded down the streets of Surrey, with Babaji's and about 10 other floats from different Sikh Organizations. Some were from the Khalsa School, where kids like 6-10years old were singing beautiful kirtan/hymns... They even had their Gatka academy performing too...

But the most important thing that i took away from the whole nagar kirtan, was the passion and pride that most of the people had in their Sikhi, their faith in the Almighty..that amazed me and swept me of my feet...

Below are a few of the pics of the Nagar Kirtan...

Once Again Wishing Everyone, HAPPY VESAKHI!!!

Semester Over...PARTY!!!

2009-04-08T20:47:00.002-07:00

MY first semester in Vancouver, was somewhat of a culture changing, yet fun experience....Provided an insight to whats important to me as a person and gave me space to grow and learn... Finally all that tension and stress over my exam papers are over!! Time to party...On top of that my parents are coming here!!! Wohoooo..

Can't wait to show them around ....Will have all the pics up...

Take care readers...

To all you hot Cha(tea) Drinkers!!!

2009-03-27T13:15:00.002-07:00

People who drink their tea piping hot run a higher risk of throat cancer than counterparts who prefer a cooler cuppa, according to an investigation published Friday by the British Medical Journal.

Cancer of the oesophagus is linked especially to smoking and alcohol abuse but hot beverages have also been considered a risk factor, possibly because of damage to throat tissue.
Interested in finding out more, Iranian researchers went to Golestan province, which has one of the highest rates of oesophageal cancer in the world.

Inhabitants there sip large quantities of hot black tea -- typically drinking more than a litre (1.8 pints) per day per person -- but also have a low incidence of tobacco and alcohol use.
A team led by Reza Malekzadeh of the Digestive Disease Research Centre at Tehran University of Medical Sciences looked at 300 people who had been diagnosed with a throat tumour and a matched group of 571 healthy people who lived in the same area.

Those who drank hot tea (between 65-69 degrees Celsius, 149-156 degrees Fahrenheit) were twice as likely to develop throat cancer compared with those who drank warm or lukewarm tea, whose temperature was 65 C (149 F) or less.

Drinking very hot tea (at least 70 C, 158 F) was associated with an eightfold increased risk compared with warm or lukewarm tea.

In an editorial, The Lancet said the study backed evidence that scorching fluids may cause damage to the throat's epithelial lining and lead to cancer, although exactly how this happens remains unclear.

But it also said that there was no cause for panic, as most people tend to drink tea at a warm temperature. Previous studies in Britain have reported an average temperature preference of 56-60 C (133-140 F).

It recommended that tea junkies wait at least four minutes before drinking from a freshly boiled cup.

The study said there was no association between the amount of tea that was consumed and the risk of cancer.

Its scope did not include an assessment of risk for coffee and other hot beverages.

2 weeks left....+ Thoughts.....

2009-03-24T22:58:00.003-07:00

A few days ago, meant that I've been 4 months here in Vancouver...away from home, away from loved ones, away from friends and everything i love about Singapore....Time flies by so fast that within 2 weeks, I'll be done with my first semester...I must say, living here, gave me a whole new view on life and reality hit me in the face hard! It made me review my dreams, my goals... I know some of you might thing that army would have done that, but seriously when i came here, it made me think, what do i want to do with my life. Do i want to waste it everyday in the office or out in the sun? Do i want to do something that I'm interested in or something that bores me to death?....Being alone here allowed me to clear my thoughts and also gave me room to breathe...

Before i end of the post, i just want you guys, my faithful readers, to ask yourself, ARE U HAPPY WITH WHAT YOU ARE DOING WITH YOUR LIFE?? ...

Back to my books.........

Outraged!!!

2009-03-20T16:23:00.002-07:00

LONDON: As flames leapt and smoke billowed out, Sikh hearts cried at the thought of holy scriptures of Sri Guru Granth Sahib getting burnt inside this most famous of the London gurdwaras. That it was a result of a racist attack only added to the pain of the community and a sense of frustration at a time when Sikhs are struggling to tell the western world who they are, and how their religion preaches universal brotherhood.
The two-decade old Gurdwara Sikh Sangat in London was ruined in a fire on Tuesday, and there were many clear indications that it was a racist attack, coming soon after sangat noticed racist graffiti on the gurdwara walls. No injuries were reported.
Eyewitnesses claim they saw the suspected arsonist -- a black or mixed-race man -- leave the gurdwara, situated in Harley Grove, Bow, East London just before flames erupted in one of the holiest parts of the gurdwara.
The blaze, which caused the gurdwara’s roof to collapse, also engulfed all but one of the eight holy books it had housed. The Evening Standard on Tuesday quoted a spokeswoman for the London Fire Brigade as saying that 75 percent of the two-storey building and its roof were damaged in the blaze

BIRS DESTROYED“It is s difficult to watch because we know what is in the temple,” said one worshipper arriving in Harley Grove after spotting a pall of smoke several streets away.

“We know what’s inside the temple. All the Birs are being destroyed.“

It is like one of my gods are burning down—we worship our Guru Granth as steps to God.”

To me this was a very hurting , yet outraging feeling towards what has happened...We must stop this hatred in the world..

I qoute from this wonderful veerji, Inderjit Singh Kallirai Cultural Advisor - California State Fair Multi-Cultural Advisor - Sacramento County District Attorney.

"Fellow readers, brothers, sisters, children and respected elders! This is not what Sikhism is about! It is also wrong to lay blame freely to one or more groups/religions/communities. Equally it is wrong for us to burn the flag of the country we call home! We need the criminal punished! for that we need justice!! Yet we can not violate the very foundation of peace upon which our faith is built. So please refrain from acts of vengeful destruction, of property or image. Further please do not create more hatred by spreading it further. Lets work on eliminating this hatred!!! We are hurt about what happened. this is not the act of a nation or a government! -- We suffered that in 1984!! This is the act of one stupid ignorant individual with a sick mind. In respect, the acts of fellow sikhs of burning the union jack is equally stupid! It creates an impression of a community and our people that we are trying others to help overcome. This is not us! We want peace, we strive for peace. Our Weapons are drawn as a last resort not to draw first blood! We are angry! very angry -- but at who and with who???? Not the British people! We are British, not because we took citizenship, but because we call Britian our home! How can we burn our own flag. By burning this flag we give cause for those calls made four decades ago by Enoch Powell in his "Rivers of Blood Speach". We do not want that not after half a century of building the Economy and infrastructure of our chosen homeland! Brother's, Sister's, Children and respected ELders!!! Please, Please, Lets protest this! lets get out to build community and rid it of hate. but lets not expand on hate. If I interpret correctly the Bhani says: "Who are the good and who are the bad? for we are all god's children!!!" So lets Spread the message of our Guru's to spread and expand peace and understanding of our faith.... But please lets not repeat this. May I also request that the idividual/s seen burning the Union Jack actually go live on TV, Radio and Print Media to publically appologise. This will help us more!!!! The last thing we need is in fighting and insults between sikhs!"

Updates...

2009-03-12T22:35:00.002-07:00

Finally, the long awaited updates on my blog...Been really drained out for the past 2 weeks with Midterm papers, assignments and not forgetting an English course presentation that's coming up this Monday...Been a student back again, ain't easy...

Moving on, Just thought i let my readers and viewers, which is you, the one who is reading this now, know that I've joined Nuffnang- Profitable organisation where i will make money by blogging, How cool is that!! The other thing is the addition of twitter to my blog. This is really a fun addition, as i can update the side of my blog, even when I'm on the go. So if you guys wanna know what I'm doing and don't see the blog update with up-to-date post, just check the twitter column out( it on the left side bar of the blog)..

Anyways, this weekend gonna be fun as we gonna be celebrating my 2 aunts birthday...I hope my aunt will love the gift that i got her..

Till next time......

Study Shows Religion may keep believers from losing their cool

2009-03-05T16:12:00.004-08:00

Religion may or may not be the opiate of the masses but a new study says it may keep believers from losing their cool when things go wrong.

"These results suggest that religious conviction provides a framework for understanding and acting within one's environment, thereby acting as a buffer against anxiety and minimizing the experience of error," said the study published in the journal Psychological Science.

Led by Michael Inzlicht, a University of Toronto psychology professor, researchers measured activity in the part of the brain - the anterior cingulate cortex - that is important for self control and acts as a warning signal that a mistake is being made.

"It acts as a cortical alarm bell," said Prof. Inzlicht. "And the finding is that the more people believe in God the less the cortical alarm bell rings."

Those with the deepest religious belief were more likely to let mistakes roll off their backs, while those who tend toward atheism were more likely to suffer stress and anxiety after committing an error.

"Karl Marx talked about religion being the opiate of the masses. Maybe he was on to something," Prof. Inzlicht said.

To test stress levels, he and his co-researchers used a "Stroop task." In it, subjects have a series words flashed in front of them. But they are told not to read the word but the colour of the word. For example, the word might be "blue" but if coloured red, the correct answer is red.

"It's difficult to do when the word and colour mismatch," said Prof. Inzlicht.

He said it is possible that a lack of anxiety may not be a good thing, as it may cause a more lackadaisical attitude.

"Anxiety can be beneficial," he said. "It gets you motivated, activated to perform at your best level. But if you're too anxious, your performance is going suffer. You're going to over analyze and think too much. What may be happening is that people with religion have a more optimal level of anxiety."

The study was not meant to argue for or against the existence of a higher being, Prof. Inzlicht said.

"Whether God is real or not is irrelevant to this study."

He called the study "statistically significant," meaning that the results should be repeatable in similar experiments and could act as a predictor to how people might react to real-world stress situations, such as today's crumbling stock markets. Prof. Inzlicht also said that no atheist in the study showed low anxiety and no religious person showed high anxiety.

Two separate studies were done and both showed the same results.

He said initially they were simply trying to understand what factors would activate these brain waves, not investigate religious belief.

At first, they asked people to describe themselves as being liberal or conservative. Then they asked others to describe their level of self-esteem. Neither of those parameters helped predict brain wave activity. It was only when they started asking about a belief in God and religiosity that a pattern developed.

National Post

VIBC Mayhem!!!( PART 2)-Finally.....

2009-02-25T20:14:00.023-08:00

Finally, i found time to finish up the post and put in up on the blog...been really busy with midterms and assignments..

So...Moving on to the Competition;

~~First up was the Cornell Bhangra from New york. Their performance wasn't that bad as it had good coordination, good music and steps but just lacked the energy needed to illustrate the beauty of Bhangra. MY RATING: 7.5/10
Here are some pics of them..(didn't even bother making a video of them)

~~Next up was the Bhangra group from Michigan..These guys were unique in the sense of their costumes and items that were used. Even the steps were not too bad. But i guess the song selection was a poor one and with a couple of noticeable mistakes let them down...
MY RATING: 7.5/10

~~Following that, came the Bruin Bhangra group...These guys had one of the coolest bhangra costumes I've ever seen.But compared to the rest, they weren't up to the standard. But with good coordination and nice costumes, didn't help their cause to win. On top of that they had a little slip up right at the end with the formation of their pyramid....
MY RATING:6.5/10
I had only made a video of part of their dance.will be up in the next post....all the Videos...

~~Next up was the Boston Bhangra.This group were really high in energy but poor in their costume selection. IT WAS JUST TOO PLAIN COLOURS!!!.. Their steps weren't that fantastic either...
MY RATING:5.5/10

This is their profile pic..

~~After this came H-Dhami 's performance. And trust me, the girls went crazy!!!I must admit, he's a good singer...On top of that he even wore a hoodie that has the Canadian flag and a guy doing bhangra covered with swaroski crystals...That hoodie is wicked man!!..

After this it was an interval for about 15Min's and knowing myself, just had to take some fun pics of our self(my cuz and me).

(My Cuz, Jessie)

And we were back to the insane competition....
Next was the group from California...DA REALZ PUNJABI (DRP). These guys rocked man!! No doubt their costumes were all the same colours but it was so soothing to the eyes when they were doing their thing. Their energy levels was also noticeably high...Bad sadly they didn't use much items like sticks and other stuff which the other groups used...
MY RATING: 8.5/10

I love this pic.. the lighting effects just adds to the energy of the performance..

United Bhangra from Vancouver was up next and received the loudest cheer as i would expect it from the home crowd..This group was really one of a kind.. They had their Bhangra music sang live!!! That must have been a plus point to the judges... but their performance really lacked the X-factor....
MY RATING: 8/10

And presenting the Winners of VIBC 2009, Bhangra Empire from San Jose..These guys blew the competition away man.. They brought the house down with their wicked formations, steps, costumes and even originality... They were deserving winners!!!
MY RATING: 10/10

This was Awesome...they had the words Canada on their back of the costumes...

VIBC Mayhem!!!( PART 1)

2009-02-23T10:41:00.011-08:00

VIBC - Vancouver International Bhangra Competition was happening this Sat 21, and for all those who know me,you know i ain't gonna miss it. And im glad i didn't.

What a Competition!! It was mind blowing .. The Bhangra teams were awesome with their various formations, bhangra steps, different types of songs-some even LIVE!!. It was truely a unique experience. Right from the start in downtown till the end, it was non-stop Bhangra Mayhem!!

Here is the ad of the competition that was aired on tv

Can u believe that i only had going to the downtown Bhangra in my mind and not the competition. It was such a coincidence thing that they had the ticket stall nearby and my ChaCha(uncle) encouraged me to go and have fun. Thanks ChaCha!! By the way below r pics from the Downtown Event..

These girls really can dance

A simple Thought

2009-02-14T22:51:00.000-08:00

The Key to realizing a dream is to focus not on sucess but significance-
and then even the small steps and little victories along your path will take on greater meaning...

Slumdog Millionaire - Movie Review

2009-02-08T16:17:00.003-08:00

I saw this movie, with high expectations after a Teacher of mine had so much of praises for the movie. And I had a wonderful time with my aunt too...

The story is based on a book titled "Q&A" by Vikas Swarup, which is based on the events related to the life of a young man named Jamal Malik who is on the hot seat as a contestant on the show Who Want's To Be A Millionaire. Each question he is asked on his journey till the last question for 2 Crore rupees has a connection with certain events in his life. As each question is asked, the movie goes into a flashback on how it was related to his past. The sequences are at times shocking and brutal. The director in the first half is guilty of over-magnifying the poverty and exploitation angle. Some scenes are disgusting to be honest. But ignore them or bear with them. Because the climax is really good, predictable but really good.

Anil Kapoor does a good job as the villainous host of the game show, initially I was wondering why he did such a role; my opinion changed after the halfway mark. The scene between Jamal and Anil Kapoor at the urinal is great.

The movie has it's moments, but the best parts are made even better thanks to A R Rahman's awesome music. Latika's theme is used brilliantly in the movie. Irfan Khan is as good as ever. Saurabh Shukla is good in his scenes as the hawaldaar. The lead actors Dev Patel and Frieda Pinto do a good job, but the best parts are those of the child actors used in the flashbacks.

The "Benjamin Franklin" sequence is amazing. The "Colt" sequence is jarring but effective. Mahesh Manjerekar is used very well in his small role.

There are quite a few villains in the movie, Jamal's brother Salim, who destroys everything that is dear to Jamal and yet saves Jamal on various occasions, Mamman the man who exploits children into begging, Mahesh Manjrekar as Javed and Anil Kapoor as Prem Kumar. Circumstances and luck help Jamal escape all his misfortune.

Give the movie a look, expect a tale of hope, and the underdog story, with realism in a fictional plot. Expect a few exploitative and manipulative scenes, considering it's a foreign director doing an Indian movie, there is an overdose of poverty/exploitation in the first half of the movie. But it's not a bad movie at all, in fact you may even like it if you don't expect too much.

The Horrible Realisation....

2009-02-06T14:10:00.005-08:00

It happened just a few weeks after i landed in Vancouver and when i went to get a phone line for myself.

In Singapore, I had hunted high and low for a good phone and the best price too. I ended up with a Cool HTC Diamond- Posted about it too.. for about $500.

But when the dealer at the rogers shop showed me the deal that if i signed a 3yr contract with them, i could get a FREE BLACKBERRY!!! and then it hit me hard, why did i splash out my $ on the HTC when i could have got myself a blackberry for free.... ARGHHHHH...

Anyways the Blackberry is so much fun, You can get your email instantly and it even has so many new ways of communicating with others..not only by calling..like the Blackberry messenger, the Windows messenger and even SKYPE!! ..

There was a couple of other stuff that i bought from the very famous WALMART like speakers that look so slick and a USB hub that allows me to connect even more stuff to my laptop at the same time....

Here's some pics of my latest additions;

2009-02-06T14:00:00.000-08:00

Gatka appears in Daily Vancouver Newspaper

2009-02-01T01:51:00.001-08:00

This was really interesting to see..For the first time i seen Sikhs appear on the front page of a Newspaper for their Religion, heritage,Tradition...And mind you these were not pictures of adult Sikhs performing Gatka, these were images of young gursikhs
who are learning this old age form of defence..

Success in Relationships...

2009-01-29T23:42:00.005-08:00

Was just surfing the net and i came across this article written by Shakti Parwha Kaur Khalsa.
Who was also Yogi Bhajan’s first student in the United States.

An exchange takes place - a communication of looks, words, touch, even fragrance-a connection is made, subtle or overt. A relationship has begun. Just as the secret of success in Real Estate is "Location, Location, Location," in relationships it’s "Communication, Communication, Communication."

The challenge is to remember that although we are all "homo sapiens," males and females of this species usually have vastly different expectations, attitudes, and abilities when it comes to communicating. Understanding and respecting the other person’s perspective, even if you don’t agree, and being willing to listen are essential if you want a harmonious relationship-with anyone!

"Familiarity breeds contempt." How do we speak to each other? Is our language rude? Would we speak the same way to a guest in our home as we do to family members? How kind, how graceful is our speech? Words can be WMDs-or at least Weapons of Individual Destruction-if we’re not careful. Yogi Bhajan used to say, "Manners make the man." The tone of voice we use and even our body language influence the impact of every word we speak. Being conscious, careful, and kind with the words we choose to say goes a long way toward keeping relationships smooth.

"Would some power the giftie gie us to hear ourselves as others hear us."

Some people seem to thrive on conflict, others don’t. Remember one of Yogi Bhajan’s rules for the Age of Aquarius: "The Other Person is You." Put yourself in the other person’s place, and then you’ll know how to communicate.

Let’s step back for a moment, and find that moment in time when we established a relationship with an "other." Between you and me, him and her, we and they, there is an inherent tension, a pull and an attraction, because all polarities exist in a state of tension. To balance the kind and amount of tension, to bring harmony (ergo: happiness), requires communication. But there’s one more thing that factors into any relationship we choose: successful relationships are built on a foundation of Commitment.

If you remember Yogi Bhajan’s "Seven Steps to Happiness," you know that happiness starts with Commitment. Whether it’s to your marriage vows, or loyalty to an employer, a friend, or family members, or to nurturing and raising a child, success begins with the intention, the integrity, the determination to "keep up" with the relationship. Commitment. So simple, and yet often so difficult!

In April of 1991, Yogi Bhajan spoke to the Khalsa Council about wisdom in relationships; it became the following poem:

Relationships Defined
When relationships break,
when relationships fail
We suffer and agonize, rant and rail

"How could it happen? Who is to blame?"
We live in misery, loneliness and pain.
Limited egos are bound to conflict
Egos destroy relationships quick.
For any relationship to be a success
Certain conditions have to be met

1) Wisdom is the Base.
The relationship starts here.
Without wisdom, disaster is near.

2) Love is the Sustainer,
It serves to maintain,Overcomes adversity, sorrow and pain.
Love is giving 100 percent
Not "yours or mine" or "what will I get?"

3) Selfless Service comes next,
to nurture and grow.Relationships thrive when both people know
Without thought of reward, pleasure or gain
Each gives to the other over and over again.

4) Selfless Service comes out of Wisdom
The Cycle is done
When separate entities truly are one –
That’s Relationship!
Only the wise understand the above.
It takes Wisdom to Serve and Wisdom to Love.

"Relationships Defined" © 1991 Yogi Bhajan© YB Teachings LLC 2006