DIXIE CHICK...HOLDING ONTO THOSE SOUTHERN ROOTS!

Fun Treat!!!

2008-07-18T22:55:00.002-04:00

How many of your kids love Scooby Doo?

If they do, then I am sure they know all about Scooby snacks, right?
Well..why don't you make them some..involve them in the process...they will love it! My kids did....here is the recipe.

Friday Funny!!!! (A little risque' so read at your own risk)

2008-07-18T08:22:00.001-04:00

Pfizer Corp. announced today that VIAGRA will soon be available in liquid
form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer.

It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one.

Obviously we can no longer call Pepsi a soft drink, and it gives new
meaning to the names of 'cocktails,' 'highballs' and just a good old fashioned
'stiff drink.'

Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of 'MOUNT & DO'

Wordless Wednesday....Pool Time Fun!!!!

2008-07-16T08:46:00.001-04:00

(Ignore the people in the background...I have no clue who they are!!)

Woe is me......

2008-07-15T08:17:00.003-04:00

NOT!!!!!!!!
(In reference to the above cartoon)...

I so wish I could take a sick day today. I feel like crap! Feel kind of sick to my stomach....plus, I think I hurt myself exercising last night. I was doing crunches, every time I would come up, my back would pop/crack...now, my tailbone hurts so bad I can barely sit down...I keep having these sharp stabbing pains in that area....I am sure you all wanted to hear that, huh? Anyway....going to make for a long painful work day. It hurts to sit down....and guess what I do all day? Sit at a desk....ouch. The only relief I get is if I am lying down on my side...I would so love to take a sick day and go home. Unfortunately, that is not an option. If I did, the people I work with would get upset...not speak to me for days...wait...they don't speak to me now....still, I would probably get wrote up or something....they have a very low tolerance for people leaving work or calling in. They make you feel like a horrible person if you do. So, I will try and tough it out.

In other news...I had my yearly gynecological appointment yesterday....everything checked out ok...I have to go by his office one morning later this week, before I eat or drink anything, have my cholesterol and blood sugar checked. He also told me to start thinking about getting a mammogram...Yikes...did that make me feel old. He said 40 would be a good time, that gives me just a little over two years....it scares the crap out of me...I have heard so many horror stories about how much it hurts...and, what the hell is up with the scales at a doctors office? Why do they always seem to weigh you more than what you weigh at home? His scales weighed me about 6 lbs heavier than what my scales at home weighed me. I have a good set of scales...they are set exactly right...the scales at my mother in laws house weigh me the same as my scales at home...yet, every single time I go to the doctor..they always weigh me heavier....that totally put me in a bad mood yesterday. I was fully clothed though, so that should allow for a few lbs, right?

We went to a new restaurant last night with the kiddos....it was way overpriced, the food was just mediocre...although the kids did behave fairly well. At least until Max decided to spill his container holding his ketchup all over the place...what a mess. I had on a white skirt and let's just say it may need to be replaced...since some of the ketchup splattered on me when he dropped it. I hate spending $70 on dinner and have it suck so bad...we should have just went to one we were familiar with and where we knew we would get value for our money...oh, well...live and learn I guess.

I think we are going to take the little guys swimming again tonight, after I get off of work. Hopefully I will feel up to it. They are so looking forward to it...I hate the thoughts of disappointing them. I think I will go get them some swim goggles and water toys on my lunch break. That way, they can kind of entertain themselves in case I am too crippled to move off the lounge chair to play with them.

That's it...I have nothing else to talk about. I need coffee..so, I'm off of here...I have to go and make it...because the losers in this office will let the empty pot sit there and burn up before they will make another one.....that pisses me off!

Later....

Questions and Answers.......

2008-07-11T09:33:00.004-04:00

Last week I opened up my blog to questions that some of you may have about little ol' Dixie here and I waited for awhile, to see what kind of questions would be posed...I only had five takers....so, here are the questions that were asked and the answers to said questions.

I Beati asked...What were my 4th of July plans....that was answered earlier in the week.

Flat asked....If I could have an evening with a celebrity, both male and female, who would they be, where would we go and what would we do...

Hmmmm....that is a tough one....male, I would have to say Julian McMahon from Nip/Tuck....he is so totally my type and I just adore him on Nip/Tuck...he is such a wild nasty boy...he definitely makes my heart go pitter patter...

As far as where we would go, what we would do....Well, I would love for him to wine me and dine me, maybe take me to a famous Hollywood Club for a little dancing and cocktails, then back to his place for some hot monkey loving!!!!!!!!!

As far as female goes....I guess my celebrity girl crush....this may come as a surprise...but I really like Dita Von Teese....I love her "old school" look, how elegant she always is and come on, she used to be With Marilyn Manson...I am sure she really knows how to party....

Plus...just look at her..she is hot, hot, hot!!! As far as where we would go, what we would do...I really don't know..maybe some shopping, lunch...then back to her place to get ready for a girls night out clubbing....just go with the flow...whatever happens, happens.

Toni asked "How did I meet my Husband"....My hubby and I met when I was going through my nasty divorce from Ex number 2...I was an emotional basket case, because Ex Number 2 was an emotionally and physically abusive jerk, addicted to drugs, didn't work, etc..etc..(blog post for a later time)...anyway, My ex had downplayed me, degraded me, lowered my self esteem so bad, even going as far as to tell me, "Who would want you, with three kids, etc"...so, one night, home alone, feeling sorry for myself, I sat down in front of my computer, and signed up for Match.com..the first night I got like 36 responses, over a couple months, I met and dated a couple guys...one in particular turned out to be a real jerk, after leaving his place one weekend, I came home, logged on to match.com, with the intentions of deleting my profile, and there was this email (from Hubby)..again. I had never answered him, in fact had deleted two prior emails from him, but for some reason...this time...I answered him. He responded right away...said he was in my city, at that very moment for the sprint car races..we talked for an hour, agreed to meet the next day in the lounge at the Holiday Inn....I was about 10 minutes late to meet him, when I walked in I seen this really tall, dark haired, very handsome man on the pay phone in the lobby...I looked around, didn't see anyone else..we tentatively approached each other, I asked if he was Keith, he said yes...I said I am Donna...He was wearing Sunglasses, he slid them down on his nose, he looked me up, he looked me down...He said, you are gorgeous! I blushed...he took my hand, we went and sat down, and I started talking...he just listenend...I talked for almost an hour...He told me later he was instantly smitten with me.....anyway, we left and had lunch...I was so comfortable with him, he followed me back to my place, we spent another couple hours together, then he left to make the two hour drive back to Lafayette (I lived in Terre Haute at the time)....He called me as soon as he got home and said he would see me on Tuesday...he came down on that Tuesday and he never left...(He drove back and forth, from Lafayette, to Terre Haute for work, for 2 years, before I finally agreed to move to Lafayette with him). We have been together ever since, I could not have been happier. It so true in regards to that saying, "The third times the charm"...because he is truly the most wonderful man I could have ever met...I was truly blessed the day fate sent him to me.

Steph asked "What is your favorite blog post"....I am not sure...I guess the birthday posts for each of my kids.

Joey asked "How did you get through the toddler and preschool years with four boys?"
Well...that is a hard one to answer....Basically, just one day at a time....it wasn't too bad really. My boys were kind of spread out. There ages now are 18, 14, 8 and 5....so, I had time in between...with each one, it actually got a little easier...My first husband, the father of the two oldest would help me out...I struggled with the third one, because his dad, my second husband was the biggest loser, he didn't work but the first year of our marriage (we were together for five years)....it was tough. But as a Mom, you do what you have to do to make sure there needs are met and they are taken care of. The last one has been really enjoyable...because his Dad, Keith...my husband now, is an absolutely amazing father. He has pretty much taken care of him 100% since the day of his birth...this is his only child, so he has been involved from the get go..not letting me do a lot for him, he wants to do it all...and he does do a lot. They are all really good kids and there have been issues along the way, what with divorces, visitation, Aaron (8 year old) being diagnosed with ADD....but, I made it...just taking it one day at a time.

If any of you have any further questions, then Don't hesitate to ask...I am open to answer anything...so, ask away and I will post them at a later date.

Dixie...

Family Night...

2008-07-10T10:42:00.004-04:00

Last night, after work...the family and I packed up and headed to our local swimming pool for family night.

Tropicanoe Cove, here in Lafayette, is more than just a pool....it is amazing. They have a wading pool that starts out at your ankles, goes to 2 1/2 ft, then it turns to your left into 3 and 4 ft, then they have a double barrel slide into six foot of water. They have an awesome kiddie area, a lazy river and a huge water slide. It was so nice to spend a couple of hours there last night with the family. I braved wearing a new bikini for the first time and before we left the house, I had some major anxiety about doing so. Although I have lost 25 lbs, and weigh in at 118 lbs now...I was still insecure about myself...wondering "What will people think?"...no matter what, I have and will always have insecurites with my body....My tummy is not flat enough, what? Can you see the stretch marks? Yikes! Hubster reassured me I looked great, to relax, wear my new bikini (sorry, no pictures...I forgot my camera...next time, I promise)....be proud of how I look...

So, we left and ventured to the park. I removed my cover clothes and eased back onto the lounge chair and started to look around...what the hell was I having anxieties about..because seriously, there were women there, wearing bikinis, strutting around, that should not have been wearing bikinis....seriously. Think Razfusha (sp?) from the movie Norbit...

OMG...my eyes. What the hell were they thinking? Maybe their attitudes about themselves were better than mine...I don't know. I just feel that if you are a rather "large" person, no one else seriously want's to see your "largeness"...Wear appropriate swimsuits and cover ups....It's not just the pool either...I see it everywhere...girls with halter tops and low riders on, with huge muffin tops....women wearing shorts so short, and three or four sizes too small....Where has the modesty gone?

I don't want to offend anyone with this post...I seriously am not down on overweight people....Some people seriously can't help it. I know how hard it is to lose weight, it is tough as hell. But, if you can't....just dress appropriately for your size....is that too much to ask? Here I was having anxieties about my bathing suit, when actually, I really should not have been. Some of these women were downright indecent...there were kids running around everywhere....and there was this one lady, walking around in an orange two piece...everything was "hanging out"....it was bad, people...really bad. I wanted to take my beach towel over and tell her, For the love of God, woman! Cover yourself! I would have felt the same way though, if it was a smaller woman, wearing a too small bikini, with everything hanging out. It is a family Aquatic center..

What do you think? Am I being too harsh? I honestly am not trying to be....Guess, what I'm saying is, have people lost all sense of respect for themselves anymore? Do they just not care?

Just like in the scene from Norbit, should people at the pool start asking these people if they even have bottoms on before they enter the pool? You can't go into a nightclub dressed inappropriatley, they will turn you away at the door. We were turned away from one once, because hubby had shorts on, instead of slacks. I think they should implement the same rule at swimming pools.

That is all I have to say about that.

Aside from all of that, it really was an enjoyable evening and I can't wait to take the kiddos back again....it only cost us $11 to get in. Cheap, cheap family entertainment and a wonderful way to relax and spend time with your family after a hard day at work.
We went for pizza afterwards and then it was home for baths, bedtime and snuggle time with the hubby, before he headed off to work. Thanks to last night...I just might make it to the end of the week.

Have a great Thursday everyone!

Dixiechick...out.

Wordless Wednesday....I love this new side to Kid Rock!

2008-07-09T15:14:00.005-04:00

Kid Rock - All Summer Long

Take a listen!!!! Man, does this bring back memories......Love it!

This Is So Me Today.......

2008-07-08T08:32:00.017-04:00

Four days off and I am back to work today. I just want to stick my head in the sand...well, um...figure of speech, since there is technically no sand here in this dismal office. But you can guarantee damn tee if I had a sombrero, I would so be covering my face with it.

I am tired, ya'll....ga'll dang tired. What a busy four days off. But..it was enjoyable. I was finally able to spend some quality time with my oldest son, Tim.
We celebrated his birthday....18!!! He has grown up so much. Max was in heaven. He so idolizes Tim and he was such a happy little boy...to be able to spend time with him, then throw in some fireworks...he was over the moon.

Here are some pictures for your enjoyment...

Tim helping me cook dinner Friday night...we were going to grill out...but, Tim wanted me to make Taco's....so, that is what we did.

Of course, Max had to help too...whatever Tim did, Max had to do as well. No, he did not have a knife...he had a little dull butter knife...so dull it would not even cut butter...but, I let him think he was helping.

Of course, we couldn't pry Justin away from the computer...he is usually one of the first to want to help me cook, but he obviously had some girl he was talking to on Myspace....(Please, ignore that hideous lamp...I had a shade on it, hubby keeps taking it off, putting it on the computer desk, so he can "see" to pay bills, etc....I move it, he puts it back...it is truly a vicious cycle).

Horsing around with water guns...in my kitchen! The face Tim made when I came into the kitchen and caught him with the water gun....(Also, Ignore my curtainless kitchen windows...I took them down to wash them, didn't have time to put them back up).

Shooting off Fireworks...

Yes...he is shooting bottle rockets off of my front porch. I was constantly yelling at Max to stay back, stay out of the way. He honestly thinks he is 15 instead of 5 years old.

"But Mommeeeeeee.....I promise I will be careful!"....um, NO MAX! Give the Bottle Rockets back to Tim, NOW!!!!

Sparklers are just a little safer...Trust me, I was hovering very close...just in case..yelling the whole time, hold it far away from you...Don't touch the hot part...I swear, if you do, you are done! (That was what I was constantly yelling at him)...he even rolled his eyes at one point and said "I am not an idiot Mommy!"

After a few close calls, not including the burn marks on my porch, I made them get down on the sidewalk.

Justin finally decided to come out and join in the fun! (In case you were wondering, Aaron 8 yr old, was with his dad)....

Once it got dark, we came in to the traditional Happy Birthday Song and cake...yum, Dairy Queen ice cream cake...Tim's favorite! (Yes, I know, I took a picture of the cake upside down...I'm an idiot!)

I wonder what he wished????

Then it was back outside for even more fireworks....

Wow, it sure didn't take long to blow through the little stash of fireworks we had. We had fountians, bottle rockets, sparklers..the cheap stuff. Unlike my neighbor next door to me. Wow, does he go all out. We spent Thursday night over at their house, watching him shoot off a couple hundred dollars worth. They were pretty spectacular.

All in all, it was a great four day weekend. How was your 4th?

Oh..I haven't forgot....

2008-07-03T15:29:00.000-04:00

I haven't forgot about the few of you that actually responded to my ask me anything post...I will answer your questions soon...I promise, and hopefully...there will be a few more...I'm just waiting around to see.

Ask away, ya'll!

Happy 18th Birthday Tim......

2008-07-03T13:15:00.017-04:00

Wow...18! Where has the time gone....I swear it just seems like yesterday that I was in the hospital, scared to death, in labor...wanting my Mom (your Grandma)...trembling with fear, knowing she could'nt be there as I gave birth to you....my first born son, (I was homesick, knew no one...wishing I could have had you in SC, so that my family could be there) A son? I thought to myself..I don't know anything about taking care of a son....I was scared. But, I had your Dad...I knew he had been through having kids, with your half sister and brother, Amanda and John, so at least one of us had a little experience. I think back and I realize I was only a year older than you are today, when I became pregnant and had you. When I first found out I was expecting you, I admit...I was terrified! I didn't fully accept that I was pregnant until I was about four months along, and I felt you flutter inside of me for the first time! Wow! It thrilled me beyond measure...all through out those remaining months...I lived to feel you move....it completely and utterly amazed me....I poured over pregnancy books, magazines...any and everything I could get my hands on, I so wanted to be the "perfect" mother for you. Your Dad and I started buying little clothes, diapers....everything I thought you would need (according to the books)...we made a trip down to SC and your Aunt Michelle and Melanie gave me a baby shower...your Grandma Spearman gave us your cradle...the very cradle that each and everyone of you have slept in, the very cradle I hope to pass on to you for your children one day. I knew you were going to be a boy....so, we had lots of blues/yellows and greens. When we returned home from SC, I washed all of your new little clothes, your Dad put the cradle together, and we started the countdown.

Before I knew it...your due date was fast approaching....It was June, I was hot, fat and so wanted you out...I couldn't wait to meet you. I had heard so many old wives tales regarding starting early labor....not all of them I felt comfortable trying, but the one your Dad and I did religiously, every evening, was to walk...boy, did we walk....Then, on July 2nd, your Dad and I went for a really long, vigorous walk, came home, I took a shower, your Dad went to bed. No sooner had I laid down, and rolled over to my side, my water broke! I jumped up, your dad jumped up....your Dad verified...yep! It's your water alright! Your Dad got a little frustrated with me...he was ready to go immediately, but..you know your Mom....I couldn't go to the hospital without fixing my hair and make up...Ha..ha....

Overall, my labor with you wasn't too bad...once I got the epidural! :) You gave us a scare at one point...your heart rate dropped really low, the Doctor was concerned the cord was around your neck...so, he said he would be back in a few minutes to check me, if I wasn't progressing....well, then I would have to have a c-section...I freaked out....I willed you to chill out, get that heart beat to normal....slowly and steadily, your little heart beat picked back up....the Doctor checked me, said I could push....with the help of some really huge forceps...they were able to get you out....you didn't cry at first...I immediately started crying, "What's wrong...What's wrong with my baby"....but, then...they laid you on my stomach...and you let out this little tiny whimper...kind of like a puppy....you opened up one little eye, peaked up at me...and I instantly fell head over heels in love with you....I was a mommy! What a wonderful feeling. I have never felt such pride and accomplishment...Oh, my God...the love I felt...my heart could hardly take it. I remember, like it was just moments ago, holding you that very first time. I remember that night, after your Dad had left, picking you up out of the bassinet...pulling the little blankets off, and just marveling at every teeny tiny little inch of you. At that very moment, I realized, everything I had ever done, everything that had ever occurred in my life, up until that moment, was in preparation for you, the most important job, the greatest honor, the most amazing joyful expierience I could ever have had.

You brought such joy and happiness into my life. Every single second I had was spent adoring you, taking care of you...I didn't want to put you down...who could resist...just look at how cute you were:

There was nothing I wouldn't do for you...even today, I still feel the same. I hope you always know, that no matter what, I will always be here for you, I will always stand by you and protect you with the same ferociousness that I did when you were little.

We have been through a lot, you and I....you have stood up for me and stood by me from the time you were seven years old, after your Dad and I split up...you wouldn't let him talk down to me...you stood up for me with him, through all of the hell that John put us through..we shared many tears together, didn't we? I apologize to you for any pain I may have caused you growing up..just know that everything I did, I always did with the best of intentions...for you and your brothers. Sometimes, I made mistakes...which caused some misunderstandings, resentment and confusion between us. I am certian that there have been times you have felt distance from me, as I have felt from you, but today, I still feel that we are close...the bond of first born son, and mother....will never go away, no matter the distance and responsibilities that keep us apart today.

You have grown up so fast...especially the last five years....it has been very hard on me, to lose most of those years with you, since you went to live with your dad....that was the hardest day of my life, the day I had to let you go....it broke my heart, but I knew that was what you wanted...regardless of the sadness and hurt that I felt, as a mother, I had to put that aside and allow you to make that choice...for your happiness.

Now look at you....you have matured into such a wonderful, fine young man. I think back to when you are a toddler and I would never have imagined the day you would turn 18...I wished I could have froze those moments and kept you little forever. You were such a happy baby (once we got out of the colic phase)and toddler...you were always hamming it up for the camera...every thing you did was a "kodak" moment and you were always ready to have your picture taken....even today, you cheese it up, don't you?

The grin, the curly hair....I couldn't fathom how cute you were....

Tim, as a son, especially my first born, I know I have held you accountable for a lot...my expectations of you have always been of the highest....and son, you have gone above and beyond those expectations. You are awesome...one of my favorite people to hang out with....you make me laugh...you put the twinkle back in my eye....you have always been the funny guy, always doing something to make someone laugh...I honestly "can't take you anywhere"...you find humor in everything.

Always the life of the party...from your imitations of Jim Carey to the drunken old man, you have a way about you that just draws people to you....being around you makes people happy. You are so sociable, so well liked and have always been that way. Even today, I stand back and watch you with your friends, and I am in awe....What a wonderful person you have truly turned out to be. For instance, when I went to Collett Park with you and observed you before your prom, with all of your friends, your girlfriend...you brought me to tears. I stood there and it was at that moment I saw the wonderful man you were turning into...I realized, My baby you were no more. I left you there, to enjoy your first real "adult" night out, I felt so forlorn..but, also, happy....Happy that I gave you life...amazed at what a short time I had had with you.

That is how I feel today...happiness, mixed in with a little sadness. Eighteen years have just flew by, I can't say that enough...and I am proud, proud of the wonderful job your Dad and I have done with you. You have a strong work ethic, a strong sense of family and you are very loving and heartfelt person. Your little brothers adore you....especially Max and Aaron...You are Max's best friend and he thinks the sun rises and sets with you. Justin loves you and admires you too...he is just not one to vocalize it as much. Being their big brother carries a lot of responsibility, and I pray that you will always be there for them, long after I am gone....don't be afraid of that responsibility....continue to be and set good examples for them to follow, never be afraid to show your love to them.

They truly adore you...

Even in the above picture...Max wasn't here yet, but I remember that Christmas Eve night, everytime he would hear your voice, he would kick the living day lights out of me.

As far as where you go from this point forward...I don't know. I hope you have much joy, much laughter, many smiles, much happiness, much love. Tim, I can never put into words what a great part of my world you truly are, or what a large portion of my heart you have claim to. You were the one that made me a mother for the first time. You have made my life truly interesting and worthwhile, and for that I thank you. 18 years ago, I had no idea how lucky I was going to be, having you for my son. You are truly one of my life's greatest accomplishments. I swear, I will always be here to listen to you and I want you to know that you will always have my support and my love for you will always be undying. It is my hope, my wish, my intention that I will always be a strong force in your life, as you are in mine...It is my wish, my hope, however misguided it may turn out to be, at times-that you will always let me.

You are beginning a wonderful stage of your life and I hope to help you along your path by sharing some of the best of what I've learned. Just know that I love you and always will. I will be there for you when I can.

Happy 18th Birthday, my son! I am so proud of you that my heart bursts....thanks for choosing me to be your Mom!

Thank God you got my good looks! You are one handsome devil! Ha! Ha!

Love always and forever,
Momma

According to Cougars...it's a blowjoy...not a job!

2008-07-02T20:23:00.002-04:00

I have acquired a 19 year old admirer....(yes, my husband knows)...but if there were no husband, and I were to return his admiration...would that make me a cougar?
LOL...check out this hilarious video...too much!

Hello??? Hello??? Is This Thing On???

2008-07-01T10:42:00.002-04:00

So, I haven't been posting anything of interest lately...my life is kind of dull, and looking back over all of my previous posts, there has been nothing exciting to blog about. My weekends are all the same...for the most part.

So....like the majority of bloggers do from time to time...I thought I would open the door for questions....

Ask little ol' Dixie here anything you want...I will do my best to answer...anything goes...so, let the questions begin. If there are still any readers out there...

I

am

waiting......

AWARDS....

2008-06-30T08:57:00.006-04:00

My bloggy friend, Sandy from over at I Beati as been on an award give a way kick...and I am one of the lucky ones to be chosen....first of all, she gave this lovely award to all of her readers...

Then she specifically called me out for this one....awwhhh, shucks!

I dazzle? Wow! Thanks so much Sandy...I truly do appreciate your thinking of little ol' me....

I pass these two awards on to everyone on my blog roll...because you all shine and dazzle me!

Have a great Monday, and thanks again Sandy! You rock!

AWARDS AND MEMES...OH, MY!

2008-06-30T08:17:00.004-04:00

Wow.....I have been chosen by I Beati..aka Sandy...to do "Share the Love Meme"....

Pick 5 bloggers - tell why you love them give their link and ask them to share the love with 5 more . Ok Here goes:

1.) Emily, from over at Designer Momma ....because she is a neigboring mid-westerner, she has absolutely adorable kids, she always has such cool give aways and product reviews on her blog.

2.) Kojak..from GlocknCuffs....
He has some great stories to tell and the dude always keeps it real!

3.) Meg...from Lucheese to Louis Vuitton..she is a snarky, beautiful southern belle...a true girl after my own heart...

4.) Pissy...from Southern Circle of Hell...she is always sassy, always beautiful, she is really funny...there are no words, just go check her out, you won't be disappointed.

5.) Steph..from over at Musings....a girl that loves wine as much as I do...always has lots of interesting things to say....and always makes me smile.

Well, there you have it....Play if you can....share the love, people...share the love!

Friday Funny....

2008-06-27T11:31:00.003-04:00

Stages of Life........

The Male Stages of Life

AGE DRINK

17 beer

25 beer

35 vodka

48 double vodka

66 Maalox

SEDUCTION LINE

17 My parents are away for the weekend.

25 My girlfriend is away for the weekend.

35 My fiancee is away for the weekend.

48 My wife is away for the weekend.

66 My second wife is dead.

FAVORITE SPORT

17 sex

25 sex

35 sex

48 sex

66 napping

DRUG

17 pot

25 coke

35 really good coke

48 power

66 coke, a limousine, the company jet

DEFINITION OF A SUCCESSFUL DATE

17 " tongue "

25 " breakfast "

35 " She didn't set back my therapy. "

48 " I didn't have to meet her kids. "

66 " Got home alive. "

FAVORITE FANTASY

17 getting to third

25 airplane sex

35 menage a trois

48 taking the company public

66 Swiss maid/Nazi love slave

HOUSE PET

17 roaches

25 stoned-out college roommate

35 black lab

48 children from his first marriage

66 Barbi

WHAT'S THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED?

17 25

25 35

35 48

48 66

66 17

IDEAL DATE

17 Triple Stephen King feature at a drive-in

25 " Split the check before we go back to my place "

35 " Just come over. "

48 " Just come over and cook. "

66 sex in the company jet on the way to Vegas.

The Female Stages of Life

AGE DRINK

17 Wine Coolers

25 White wine

35 Red wine

48 Dom Perignon

66 Shot of Jack with an Ensure chaser

EXCUSES FOR REFUSING DATES

17 Need to wash my hair

25 Need to need wash and condition my hair

35 Need to color my hair

48 Need to have Francois color my hair

66 Need to have Francois color my wig

FAVORITE SPORT

17 shopping

25 shopping

35 shopping

48 shopping

66 shopping

DRUG

17 shopping

25 shopping

35 shopping

48 shopping

66 shopping

DEFINITION OF A SUCCESSFUL DATE

17 " Burger King "

25 " Free meal "

35 " A diamond "

48 " A bigger diamond "

66 " Home Alone "

FAVORITE FANTASY

17 tall, dark and handsome

25 tall, dark and handsome with money

35 tall, dark and handsome with money and a brain

48 a man with hair

66 a man

HOUSE PET

17 Muffy the cat

25 Unemployed boyfriend and Muffy the Cat

35 Irish setter and Muffy the Cat

48 Children from his first marriage and Muffy the Cat

66 Retired husband dabbles in taxidermy, stuffs

Muffy the Cat

WHAT'S THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED?

17 17

25 25

35 35

48 48

66 66

IDEAL DATE

17 He offers to pay

25 He pays

35 He cooks breakfast the next morning

48 He cooks breakfast the next morning for the kids

66 He can chew breakfast

DIXIE

THURSDAY 13...........

2008-06-26T09:56:00.002-04:00

13 THINGS TO DO WITH YOUR KIDS THIS SUMMER:

1.) Make a scrapbook of everything you do this summer. Check out the basics of scrapbooking here !

2.) Have a picnic....Unsure of how to plan the perfect picnic? Go here...

3.) Visit a farm....if you can't go to a real one...check out a virtual farm here!

4.) Take a walk and record the sounds....for more information about nature, go here.

5.) Have your kids keep a journal of what they do for the summer. For summer journal writing prompts, go here.

6.) Go backpacking....for how to's...go here.

7.) Visit the Zoo...check out websites for zoo's in your area. Don't forget the camera!

8.) Make a treasure hunt...for how to's...go here.

9.) Set up a lemonade stand...for a lemonade stand game, go here.

10.) Create a terrarium...what is a terrarium you ask? Go here to find out!

11.) Make up bubble solution and have a contest...for secret bubble solutions, go here.

12.) Build a time capsule...for info, go here.

13.) For the older kids, if they don't like the idea of keeping a hand written journal, Learn to blog (parents permission)...to teach them how blogs work, go here....

For 88 more things to do with your kids this summer....go check out this link!

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY.......

2008-06-25T10:31:00.001-04:00

My weekend.....or the past three days......

2008-06-24T09:13:00.005-04:00

Was kind of like the title of this movie....

It started out good, turned ugly, then ended bad.

Friday night I went tanning after work, rushed home, worked out, then dressed for dinner...hubby had bought me this adorable silver/black halter top, these black shorts

and a pair of sexy strappy sandals...kind of like these....

So I opted to wear those for dinner. I was so pleased with my appearance. I don't usally toot my own horn, but girl here was smoking. We went to this little out of the way steak house in West Lafayette, called McGraws....it is very intimate, very nice and their food was supposed to be phenomenal. When we got there, it was about eight p.m., the place was packed. Hubby couldn't find a place to park, so he dropped me off at the entrance, to go in, see if we could luck out and get a table. Usually, it is better to have reservations. As luck would have it, there was one small table, in the bar area that was available and I grabbed it. I had no sooner sat down, then I was approached by this tall nice looking gentleman, who squatted down beside me at my table, put his arm around my shoulders and said, "My friends and I noticed you come in, and if you are dining alone or with a girlfriend, we would like to buy your dinner and drinks...you are absolutely beautiful and we would consider it an honor. I glanced over to his "friends" who looked to be a table of nice looking guys, some dressed up, some in golf attire...probably businessman of some sort...I thought. I was flattered, but informed him that I was not alone, my husband was parking the car and would be inside soon. He apologized for the intrusion, but said, "Your husband is indeed a very lucky man"....and left. I was a little embarassed, but very pleased....that all of my dieting and hard work has been worth it. I truly felt as beautiful as this gentleman and his friends said I was. My husband tells me all the time, but sometimes...it's nice to hear from someone else.
Hubby came in and I told him about the guys wanting to buy my dinner...he wasn't mad at all...in fact, he laughed and said, I should have let them. LOL....he can be funny. Hubby wasn't that hungry, so we opted to order a salad with poached salmon, soup and split the salad. I honestly didn't care for it....if I eat salmon, it has to be hot/cooked...not poached and cold. It was terrible. I managed to eat some of it, gave the rest to hubby, had two glasses of wine and we left. Hubby left to get the car, I stood outside waiting for him...as I was standing there, another guy approached me as he was leaving and said, "I just want to tell you, You are gorgeous"....I thanked him, hubby pulled up, I hopped in the car and we left. Hubby had to go to work, so I had another bottle of wine chilling at home....my next door neighbor ended up coming over along with my new friend T...we hung out on my front porch, drinking wine, talking and laughing until the wee hours of the morning.

Saturday, I had to get up, after only four hours of sleep, and head to town with hubby, we did the nail salon thing, the mall thing, then I went tanning again, hubby took me for a late lunch. All day, I felt kind of yucky, but I attibuted that to maybe too much wine Friday night. Not the case...I ended up feeling extremely ill at lunch, after tanning, I got violently sick....vomiting/diarrhea...the whole nine...I went home and laid down, hoping it would pass, because hubby and I had huge plans for a night on the town in Indianapolis. I forced myself to shower and dress, we headed for Indy...turned out to be a bad decision. We started at a private club we go too..bad choice, so we left early, headed to Ike and Jonesies...there were too many people in there....I would say they had about 100 more people than they should have....it was packed...I stood in line to get a coke, getting jostled, bumped and shoved, after 10 minutes...I motioned for hubby and we walked out. We checked in at a few more places....I was really starting to feel bad, so I told hubby we really needed to head home. I was sick from midnight on...until finally, Sunday morning, Hubby got scared and decided he should take me to the Emergency Room...where I was diagnosed with having contracted Salmonella food poisoning..from the freaking tomatoes, in the salad...the only part of the salad hubby didn't eat. He said he felt a little nauseous, but he didn't get sick like I did...
That was my Sunday...Monday morning, my allergies kicked my ass so bad, I thought I had pink eye, so...I had to call off of work and go to the eye doctor to find it wasn't pink eye but allergies.

I swear...I can't win sometimes. Now, I am back to work today, with leaky, watery eyes...and a bad temperament....I have a feeling this is going to be a long, long week. That is the bad of this whole story.

Later....

DREAMS.....OF DOG THE BOUNTY HUNTER????

2008-06-20T11:38:00.004-04:00

I dreamed about this guy last night....What the heck????

I have not watched his show in ages...seriously, never given him a second thought/or look. Why in the hell would I have dreamed about him? It was weird...nothing sexual, so get your mind out of the gutter...totally not my type....EEEeeewwww! But, in my dream he was only about five foot tall....I kept saying, Dude...why are you so short? He was giving my kids money...we were all in this really weird house, kind of like a tree house with different levels? WTH??? I don't often remember my dreams, seldom do I dream....Mama here needs to lay off the sauce before bedtime (by sauce I mean the glass of chardonnay I had before bed)...dreams like this will mess your head up!

Just thought I would share....carry on!

Friday Funny.....

2008-06-20T08:22:00.002-04:00

Why we love children.......

A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead. How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil. "Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently. "You did WHAT?!?" the teacher exclaimed in surprise. "You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."

A small boy is sent to bed by his father Five minutes later...."Da-ad..." "What?" "I'm thirsty. Can you bring drink of water?" "No, you had your chance. Lights out." Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad...." "WHAT?" "I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water??" "I told you NO! If you ask again, I'll have to spank you!!" Five minutes later......"Daaaa-aaaad....." "WHAT!" "When you come in to spank me, can you bring a drink of water? "

An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him "How do you expect to get into Heaven?" The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, 'For Heaven's sake, Dylan, come in or stay out!'"

One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy's room." A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."

It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children's sermon. All the children were invited to come forward. One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat down the pastor leaned over and said, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?" The little girl replied, directly into the pastor's clip-on microphone, "Yes and my Mom says it's a bitch to iron."

When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, "Mommy, you are getting fat!" I replied, "Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy." "I know," she replied, "but what's growing in your butt?"

A little boy was doing his math homework He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine...." His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?" The little boy answered, "I'm doing my math homework, Mom." "And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked. "Yes," he answered. Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in math?" The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition." The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?" After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four."

One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, "... and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, ' The sky is falling, the sky is falling!" The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?" One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy Shit! A talking chicken!'" The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said, "Aren't you Mr Sugarbrown's daughter?" She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I'm not."

A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?" Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough." The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"

A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father she stands next to the barber chair, while her dad gets his hair cut, eating a snack cake. The barber says to her, "Sweetheart, you're going to get hair on your Twinkie." She says, "Yes, I know, and I'm going to get boobs too."

Thursday 13......

2008-06-19T08:49:00.002-04:00

Quaint Southernisms

1.) Afore ~ Just as good as "before" in some parts.

2.) Bammer~ The state west of Jawjuh (Georgia). Capitol is Buhminhayum (Birmingham), e.g. "A tore-nader jes tore through Bammer 'n left $20,000,000 in improvements."

3.) Conniption ~ A major fit, total loss of control of one's temper; you pitch a conniption (hissy).

4.) Damyankee~ City-slickers from exotic places like New York, Chicago or Philadelphia. (Notice down South it is one word.)

5.) Edgy-cation~ Larnin whut gives you a edge in life. "He got lots of smarts but not much edgy-cation."

6.) Fixin ~ Getting ready to: "I'm fixin to leave."

7.) Grits~ Do you have to ask?

8.) Hire yew ~ Variant of "Heidi doo!" used divine the current state of the listener. In fact the two phrases may be combined as in, "Heidi, hire yew?

9.) Idnit? ~ Same problem as with bidnis—them "s's" before "n" again.

10.) Pocketbook~ A woman's purse (a bag is something different).

11.) Purdy, Purt~ Attractive, as in She's downright purdy. Fairly, Hey, that came purt near hittin me!

12.) Reckon ~Think, figger. "I reckon he done got too big fer his britches, thinkin he's a lawyer."

13.) Sump'n teet~ Food.

That is just a sample...for more Quaint Southernisms....check out this link Your Dictionary.com

Have a quaint Thursday, ya'll!

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY......

2008-06-18T08:27:00.005-04:00

Pictures from my neck of the woods...downtown Lafayette/West Lafayette and Purdue University.

Back to the Grindstone.....so to speak.....Long weekend post ahead.....

2008-06-16T09:47:00.009-04:00

Unique Monday Comments

Wow....here it is, another Monday, another week to get through. Although, this Monday has started off better than last Monday...surprisingly, I am in pretty good spirits. The work week looks great, My new manager is on vacation....so, I should be able to finish some projects I need to get done, in relative peace....it should be a nice quiet week...if I can get past the roofers that are on top of our building, putting on a new roof...pounding and pounding away. Good thing I'm not hung over or that would suck!

The drive into work this morning was nice...at least there was no rain and the sun was shining....my spirits were up, I'm zooming along the highway, singing along with Natasha Beddingfield..."I gotta pocket, got a pocket full of sunshine, I got a love and I know that's it's all mine"....you get the picture...when WHAM!!!!! Out of nowhere, a freaking big ass bird flew right into my windshield...I just about crapped my pants....There was bird feathers and blood smattered all over my window. I had to stop at the gas station when I got into town to use the window washy thing at the gas pumps to get the ooze of its remains off! Talk about a way to put a cloud over my pocket full of sunshine! I should have felt bad, but really...I didn't....damn bird should have been watching where it was going...I was just minding my own business...not my fault it decided to commit suicide on my car.

Moving on....let's see..what should I talk about next....Ummmm...the weekend was busy. As usual...Friday night, after work, I drove down to the meeting point (40 miles away) to meet up with Ex Numero Uno...to retrieve my son Justin for the weekend. Hubby decided to stay home with the two little ones, so the drive down was peaceful...I had my Ipod plugged in....after a stressful week, it was nice to enjoy the ride by myself. On the way home, Justin and I were hungry, hubby told me to take him out to eat, he would take care of dinner for himself and the two little rugrats...so, Justin and I stopped at BW 3's....(Buffalo Wild Wings)....it was extremely crowded....but, we only had a 10 minute wait...it was nice, to have that time to sit and have dinner with the 14 year old, catch up on the important things in his life..which right now, it seems consists of football, football and more football. This entire summer he has to be at practice at 7 a.m. every morning. What a way to spend the summer....but, football is his dream. He wants to play for the Colts, possibly start out by attending Purdue University here in Lafayette, play for the Boilermakers...I sure hope that it works out for him. Worse case scenario...I see him being a high school gym teacher or football coach....which is perfectly fine if you ask me..but, he is dreaming big....NFL...I sure hope that his dreams come true for him.
After we got home, hubby was sleeping, he had to work Friday night, so I left the two little charges in Justins care and went for my 3 mile walk. I have been doing that for about three weeks now....I have it down to about 45 minutes....I haul ass...it was hot out, one point, I thought I was going to pass out. It is getting a little easier....I am starting to throw a little running in with it....when I say little, I mean little...Like, I will walk for 15 minutes at a real fast pace, then I will take off into a jog for about 1/8 of mile, then I walk again for like 10-15 minutes. I hate exercise...but, to maintain my weight loss, I know that it is necessary....now I just need to throw in a little abdominal exercises.....by the end of summer, maybe my tummy will be taught and firm again....I will never have a six pack....but, after four kids...I need to work on that area a little more.

Let's see...Saturday was a busy, busy day...Hubby and I had some errands to run, so we rousted all the kids up, corraled them out with us....we paid some bills at the bank, then went over to the mall for a couple hours. I wanted to get Hubby something for Fathers Day...but, he was more interested in buying some sexy stuff for me....He is impossible! For Fathers Day, he wanted to dress me up and take me out that night. He said that gives him more pleasure than anything else, that is what he wanted...so, he bought me a new short white skirt, hot pink top and these awesome hot pink and white heels....I should have took a picture of them....very sexy, very cute....
We bought 14 year old some shorts...got 8 year old a hair cut, then left the mall to go grab a bite to eat...we went here....

That was the first time I had ever been in that particular establishment, I must say, it was the worst food I have ever ever eaten. Hubby ordered fish and chips and it looked like he had been served Gordman's fish sticks.....terrible!
At this point, Hubby was pissed, tired, irritable, so we paid our bill, grudgingly, headed home. Hubby went to bed and I made a batch of brownies, took the kids to the park across the street from our house, then came home to get ready for a night out with my hubby and a new girlfriend of mine. We hired a babysitter to sit with the little guys....I dressed up in my new outfit for hubby....and we picked up my new friend T...who is going through a divorce right now..bless her heart...she needed a night out...we started out a martini bar...then ended up at the Neon Cactus...they have this fab piano bar, where a guy named Bruce Barker plays just about any song you can think of..plus, not only is he an excellent piano player...but the dude is seriously funny, he gets the crowd involved....its a lot of fun...I only had a couple drinks....I had the kiddos to go back home to..so, I was watching my alcohol consumption, but my friend T...not so much....she was throwing back Long Islands (after having 2 strong martinis at the martini bar mind you)....after about an hour, hour and a half, she wanted to go outside and smoke (West Lafayette is a non smoking city~so to smoke at any establishment, you have to smoke outside)...that is when our night came to an abrupt end....one moment, chickie was standing up talking, the next...she was laying on the sidewalk puking....Wow~hubby went and got the car, she passed out, with stop on the way home to throw up again...hubby was screaming, not in the car..thankfully, he got the car pulled over in time...we finally got her home, and put her in bed...then we got home....paid the sitter, went to bed ourselves...but, not before I gave hubby his real fathers day present...HHrruummmpphhh!

Sunday Morning came a little to early for me....after only four hours sleep, Max woke me up, demanding I cook pancakes and bacon....so, after cooking, cleaning, showering and dressing (everyone) we had a late lunch/early dinner at a local pizza place..then headed down to hubbys parents lake house to meet the Ex Numero Uno to drop Justin off and also so that hubby could visit with his dad for Fathers Day...we hadn't bought his Dad anything...so, we stopped by the store to get him a card...hubby had ordered his dad some fishing lures from Bass Pro online, hadn't got them yet, so in the meantime hubby bought his dad these...

Seriously..he did. His dad has a John Deere runabout that he uses down at the lake, hubby thought it would be funny to get him the dice to hang from his rearview mirror....I didn't see where his dad would find the humor in them..but hubby assured me he would. I was embarrassed..but, what are you going to do? He knows his dad better than anyone else. Everyone got a good laugh out of it.

Here in the Mid West, as I am sure you all know, we have gotten a ton of rain....a lot of areas have flooded...I didn't realize how badly, until we were down at the lake. My in-laws built a house on their property a couple years ago....right on the lake front....the water has now risen to within eight feet of their lower deck...the highest it has ever been...there dock is under water, the swing/shed down by the water is under water....unreal...scary if it doesn't recede soon, especially if we get more rain...

Here are some photos I took...

Needless to say...when we left, we had another huge storm roll through, with more rain....I worry about the pressure on the dam for that lake...it would be terrible for the in-laws if they were to be flooded out...I sure hope the water level recedes soon.

We got home around 9 p.m., gave the kiddos baths, put them to bed....hubby went to work and mama here wound down with a glass of wine and a novel....

I am already anticipating this next weekend....all the kiddos will be gone, it will just be hubby and myself....this week may not be too tough after all.

Have a great Monday everyone!

Things to Ponder.....

2008-06-13T10:02:00.000-04:00

Three Things to Ponder:

1. Cows
2. The Constitution
3. The Ten Commandments

C O W S

I s it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.

T H E C O N S T I T U T I O N

They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq . Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore.

T H E 1 0 C O M M A N D M E N T S

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this:

You cannot post 'Thou Shalt Not Steal,' 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery,' and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians...It creates a hostile work environment.