Minority Man

Singapore Prompts Indonesia on Haze

2006-11-15T02:32:00.000-08:00

Desperate Singapore tried some unorthodox methods to subliminally persuade Indonesia to eradicate the haze problem. During the recent ASEAN meeting of environment ministers Singapore's Yuck-Cough Ibrahim undertook to light a cigarette and blow smoke towards his Indonesian counterpart's face. This was done to demonstrate that Singapore will not remain content to blow just hot air over the issue.

Dinner entertainment was provided by Singapore Idol Hazy Mirza singing a dedication to the Indonesian delegates with the song "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes".

----
Report from TODAY Newspaper

Battle against haze hots up

Wednesday • November 15, 2006

Ansley Ng
ansley@mediacorp.com.sg

THANKS to the lurking El Nino, which is threatening to strike in force next year, a strong sense of urgency has seized the region in the battle against haze.

In fact, what has been happening in the last five weeks, during which regional officials were engaged in a series of meetings, has yielded "hope and optimism", said Environment and Water Resources Minister Yaacob Ibrahim yesterday as he fielded questions from MPs on the haze situation.

Describing the measures that have been drawn up as "concrete", the minister however cautioned that it is not a problem that can be solved overnight.

"I am a bit more optimistic now that we have something concrete," said Dr Yaacob. "(But) will we solve the problem next year? I don't think so. We would require long-term effort."

Singaporeans should not expect this to be solved in one or two years, he said.

He explained: "You need concrete action at the ground to develop new capacities among farmers and land owners to make sure they resolve to use land clearing methods that were more environmentally friendly."

Even as they set out to fight the haze problem on two fronts, fire prevention and suppression, simply having farmers change their slash-and-burn method to the modern method to clear land would take some time, Dr Yaacob added. They would have to be given equipment, and be taught to use and maintain it.

While there is clear and strong political commitment on Indonesia's part to eradicate the problem, Dr Yaacob also said that the country needs to ratify the Asean (Association of South-east Asian Nations) Haze Agreement to show its political resolve.

He hopes details of the implementation plans will be sorted out before the Ministerial Committee meets again in February 2007.

In response to MP Madam Halimah Yacob (Jurong GRC) who wanted to know the impact of the haze problem on the economy and the health of the population, Dr Yaacob said that a local professor is studying economic losses from the haze. Prolonged periods of haze, he added, would lead to losses stemming from a rise in hospitalisation cost, tourism, productivity and recreational activities.

Wee Shu Min Jokes

2006-10-28T01:44:00.000-07:00

Q. What does Wee Shu Min tell her mole while looking at the mirror every single day ?

Ans: Get out of my elite, uncaring face

Q. Why did Shu Min's dad and RJC's principal insisit that she go for counselling ?

Ans: So she can get out of this elite, uncaring phase.

Q. Why won't the Internal Security Department hire Wee Shu Min ?

Ans: Due to traumatic personal experience, she may be reluctant to plant a mole on someone else.

China Lady Loses "Right To Sex" Lawsuit

2006-09-01T02:12:00.000-07:00

A lady in China lost a lawsuit over compensation for lack of sex after her husband's cock was injured in an accident. The amount sought was 220,000 yuan (SG$43,500) to cover mental anguish and for the purchase of vibrators. I am guessing that this large figure means batteries were included.

Now that she lost the lawsuit, I suppose she could earn some money by acting in these adult movies:

Warning (NSFW)

Adult Movie 1 (Click on the large photo thumbnails on the left to see free previews)
Adult Movie 2

Read the related news article on Reuters:

China court rejects suit over right to sex

Reuters
Thursday, August 31, 2006; 4:19 AM

SHANGHAI (Reuters) - A Chinese court has rejected a woman's claims for compensation for her sex life, which was ruined when her husband was injured in an accident, the Shanghai Daily reported on Thursday.

Wei Suying, 31, whose husband has suffered from erectile dysfunction since a 2003 workplace accident, filed suit in a Shanghai court asking for 220,000 yuan ($27,650) in compensation from the shopping center where the accident occurred, it said.

The compensation included claims for mental anguish and for her purchases of products such as vibrators.

"I was not even 30 years old when my husband had the accident, which deprived me of my right to enjoy sexual life," the newspaper quoted Wei as saying.

But the court ruled that Chinese law does not define an individual's sex life as a protected right. Relatives can only ask for mental anguish compensation when a victim dies, the report said.

Wei's husband, Zhang Chengxiang, stumbled and hit his genitals on the corner of some audio equipment when an iron bar fell from a vent and knocked his head while he was working in a shopping center, it said.

The shopping center had paid Zhang 130,000 yuan ($16,340) in compensation in a previous lawsuit.

In pre-communist China, sex was less a taboo than it became under former leader Mao Zedong, when it became a matter of doing one's reproductive duty for the state.

Since then, the government has embarked upon a stern family planning policy to control a booming population -- the world's largest -- but official attitudes toward sex remain puritan, though they are changing slowly.

($1=7.956 Yuan)

2006 National Day Rally Speech

2006-08-30T10:25:00.000-07:00

PM Lee spoke about the Digital Age in his 2006 National Day Rally Speech. He mentioned a famous parody website and then went on to make a gaffe in Hokkien about ordering "mee siam" without "hum". In other words he went from talking cock to talking cockles.

The PM's assumption that mee siam contains cockles together with his refusal to allow someone else to vet his speech shows that he is very ~~shellfish~~ selfish.

Mr Brown's parody of "mai hum" may prompt PM Lee to avoid, like cockles, another food item: black-eyed peas.

Song Parody: Cleaning Out My Closet by Eminem

2006-08-30T05:59:00.000-07:00

Parody of the song "Cleaning Out My Closet". I don't think Eminem will be too thrilled by this. With the title containing words like "closet" and "out", I guess it was only a matter of time somebody, errr, came out to mock it.

Check it out, pun intended.

Zoe Tay Gets Adult Movie Offer

2006-08-29T06:21:00.000-07:00

Zoe Tay has been offered to act in an adult movie. If she agrees, she would be appearing in number 23 of this DVD series. Zoe will not be the first Asian women to be featured though. Title number 8 stars Filipina Mei Yu.

Warning: NSFW
Click on this link for more info. Links to all titles appear on the bottom right.

Zoe Tay Interview

2006-08-28T21:01:00.000-07:00

S.W. Low of the Staid Times interviews Zoe Tay after the launch of the 'I Swallow' Imedeen skin tablets ad.

S.W. : So Zoe, do you really swallow ?

Zoe: Of course I do. That's the only way to take those pills.

S.W. : Did Phillip, your fighter pilot husband, have anything to say about this ad?

Zoe: He did express some concerns but I reassured him that people would think about pills and not other things when they see my ad. I think he found that hard to swallow.

S.W. : Is there anything you won't swallow ?

Zoe: Yes, my pride.

S.W. : (Mumbles) That explains that awards show fiasco with Fann and Christopher.

Zoe: What ???

S.W. : Nothing, nothing. I heard you love dogs. Is there a breed you don't like ?

Zoe: I don't fancy Spitz so much.

S.W. : So have you had any new offers to do ads ?

Zoe: Listerine wants me to do an 'I gargle' ad and a toy company wants me to do an 'I blow bubbles' ad. I also got a wierd offer. A special kind of bank asked me if I would like to do a "Sometimes I don't swallow but keep and donate" ad. They said it was a 'pilot' project. They want to increase their deposits from pilots. They were only interested in making an oral agreement with me.

S.W. : What do you think about your career prospects now ?

Zoe: I am very excited about my prospects. I think I will soon become the most popular star in Singapore, just like the good old days.

S.W.: You should not get too confident. There is a saying in the West, "One swallow does not make a summer".

Zoe: Huh? Singapore where got summer ?

S.W.: Never mind. Let's change topic. Singapore men must be wondering what your sex life is like since giving birth. Care to tell us ?

Zoe: You won't believe this but Phillip and I have become more adventurous.

S.W.: Wow, care to elaborate ?

Zoe: Let's just say that Philip, my fighter pilot husband, has access to 3 cock-pits when in bed with me.

S.W. : Last question. What advice do you give your fighter pilot husband so that he comes home safe ?

Zoe: I tell him "At home you can ejaculate in my cock-pits, but at work don't be late to eject from your cockpit.

Zoe Tay in Government Campaign

2006-08-28T13:57:00.000-07:00

Hot on the heels of her successful 'I Swallow' advertisement, Zoe Tay has been roped in by the government to help spread an old message.

Zoe Tay Campaign Poster

Men, Women, Etc

2006-02-02T08:40:00.000-08:00

John Gray has just written a sequel to his bestseller. This latest book was written for male readers and is titled:

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, and Gays wish they were in Uranus.

Ladies, Don't Lose Your Locker Key in Japan

2005-10-27T00:11:00.000-07:00

There is a locker service in Japan that has an unorthodox way of punishing female clients that lose their locker keys. I wonder how many Singaporean men would volunteer to work there. [Fiction]

Take a look (NSFW).

Directing Traffic

2005-07-29T12:36:00.000-07:00

Traffic wardens take note: This is how NOT to direct traffic.

This is the correct way.

No Fashion Sense

2005-07-27T17:48:00.000-07:00

The son of Equatorial Guinea's president has a reputation for spending millions on luxuries in Paris.

No matter how much he spends on clothes, Singaporeans will always think he is hopelessly out of fashion.

Here is the reason why:

The Times
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/
July 21, 2005

President's playboy son splashes out £1m in luxury car spree
By Xan Rice

MOST of his country’s citizens survive on less than 60p a day, but that has not stopped the son of the President of Equatorial Guinea from spending nearly £1 million on three luxury cars during a remarkable shopping spree in South Africa.

Teodorin Nguema Obiang, the Minister of Forestry, Environment and Housing in his father’s Government, bought a black Bentley Arnage and a cream Bentley Mulliner worth £600,000 last weekend. He then added a white six-litre Lamborghini Murcielago worth £275,000 to his fleet, according to The Star newspaper.

Oil was discovered in Equatorial Guinea a decade ago and the country, a former Spanish colony, now has Africa’s fastest-growing economy. The boom inspired a failed coup attempt last year led by Simon Mann, a former SAS officer, and partly financed, unwittingly, by Sir Mark Thatcher.

Mr Obiang, 34, is renowned for his playboy lifestyle. A regular on the international party circuit, he owns a hip-hop record label in the United States and the only private radio station in Equatorial Guinea.

He is believed to own homes in London, Paris and Los Angeles, and to have two Cape Town mansions, each costing more than £2 million.

For his latest trip to Cape Town, Mr Obiang stayed in a £700-a-night suite at the Mount Nelson Hotel, and ran up a £1,300 bill on champagne for his entourage at the bar on Friday night. His new vehicles were outside. Staff said that they belonged to an “African prince”.

The Equatorial Guinean embassy in Pretoria would not comment on the visit, calling it “private business”.

Between 2001 and 2004, the GDP of Equatorial Guinea more than doubled, to $4.5 billion (£2.6 billion), but most people remain desperately poor.

American and European oil companies have ignored the Government’s appalling record on human rights.

Hundreds of millions of dollars have allegedly been siphoned off by President Obiang’s family, which includes more than a dozen government ministers who dominate the country’s security apparatus.

The US Senate is continuing its investigation into payments of $700 million of oil revenue into bank accounts under the President’s control.

Teodorin Obiang is known to have made millions of dollars from ownership of a timber company.

Despite his unpredictable nature — he is rumoured to have fired a shot during a recent argument with his ailing father, who has prostate cancer — he is the favourite to become the country’s next leader.

But he faces a bitter struggle with his brother, Gabriel Mbegha Nguema Lima, who is the Oil Minister, and his uncle, General Armengol Ondo Nguema, who is the National Security Adviser.

Real Madrid Love Triangle

2005-07-26T15:07:00.000-07:00

Seems like Ronaldo (second from right) has the hots for Japanese model Ari Ota.

Kimono Party Girl Miss Ota, on the other hand, is holding some white guy.

This photo was taken at a press conference to promote Real Madrid's official film, 'Real The Movie,' in Tokyo Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Buying Milk

2005-07-24T10:01:00.000-07:00

Would you buy milk from this shop ?

Circumcision Joke

2005-07-23T13:44:00.000-07:00

The circumcision failed due to unforeskin circumstances.

Hmmm, the wonder what they do with all those discarded foreskins.

Virgin Urinals

2005-07-23T02:31:00.000-07:00

Urinals

Back in March 2004 Virgin Airlines had planned to install these bright red urinals shaped like a woman's lips in its Upper-Class lounge in JFK Airport, New York. I wonder why they chose this design. Was it some kind of subliminal advertising ? The message being: "As long as you go strictly oral, you always remain Virgin." Singapore Airlines has the slogan "A Great Way to Fly". Now meet "A Great Way to Unzip a Fly".

The airline seems to really indulge their male pilots. After getting some oral stimulation by these urinals they get to enter the cockpit. Talk about full service.

A British aristocrat used to boast that he would regularly abuse these urinals. Janitors though could not find any evidence of this. Turns out that this gentleman is a low-sperm Count.

I don't think it is a good idea to install these urinals in public buildings as they have a tendency to attract jerks and seamen. It would be appropriate, however, to install them in the attached toilet of a man's ~~masturbate room~~ master bedroom.

Sore Stomachs in Balasore

2005-07-22T12:36:00.000-07:00

Police in the Indian city of Balasore punished the male viewers of a porn movie by making them do sit-ups in public. The police chief, Mr. Sanjeev Panda, probably wanted to public to sit up and notice this.

Why punish the stomach when the guilty parties are the eyes, hands and cock ? Should'nt they have been ordered to milk cows ? This way they would still be using their hands to produce a white liquid. Only this time it brings benefits to the public.

Get your trousers up and give me ten
DeHavilland Information Services
18 July 2005

Randy cinemagoers in India were given a punishment of public humiliation after being caught with their pants down watching a porn movie.

The 200 or so culprits, some of whom were teenagers younger than 17, were forced to do ten sit ups outside the cinema, some in front of their parents, reports the Hindustan Times.

They also had to vow never to watch a pornographic film again, an activity that is outlawed in India.

Sanjeev Panda, police chief in the Balasore district, said: "Earlier we acted against the [cinema] hall owners and their staff but it failed to effectively check screening of obscene movies, so we decided to crack down on the audience."

Interracial Dating

2005-07-20T23:20:00.000-07:00

When it comes to interracial dating, white women are known to say "Once you go black, you never go back". Caution: Nudity, NSFW Pic

Chinese character for "black". Elongated, naturally......

Last Word on the NKF Saga

2005-07-19T04:15:00.000-07:00

Wanted: Mr. Peanut

SPG's Apartment Search

2005-07-19T00:06:00.000-07:00

As the Sarong Party Girl will be starting her studies in NTU soon, she is now looking for an apartment to ~~rant~~ rent.

She clearly states that she is not interested in an HDB flat. We seem to see a pattern here. She is Chinese, but is not interested in Chinese men. Now we learn that she won't live in a flat even though she herself is flat.

SPG boasts to her prospective landlords that she is neat and does her dishes before going to bed. I beg to differ. When it somes to toilet hygiene there is clear evidence that she knows squat.

As for her active sex life, she promises to tape her mouth shut after 11 pm to ensure a quiet night for the neighbours. If you are an angmoh guy looking to hook up with SPG to enjoy oral services at midnight, this will probably be a big blow.

Snakes in Melaka

2005-07-18T10:18:00.000-07:00

Came across this photo with an enigmatic caption: Photo.

I wonder if the one with the "white big snake" is wearing underwear similar to this.

Double meanings aside, this Singapore-based blogger takes beautiful photos.

Drinks like a Fish

2005-07-16T23:39:00.000-07:00

This guy obviously had too much to drink at Post Bar in Fullerton Hotel. He was forced to rush outside to vomit.

No Gas Found in Northern Singapore

2005-07-16T20:33:00.000-07:00

SCDF spokesman Mr. Ken Tut announced that no gas was observed in the northern part of Singapore. This may prompt you to ~~gas~~ guess whether SCDF stands for Singaporeans Carefully Detecting Farts. Actually they were looking for more dangerous gases. Even SCDF's Hazardous Materials (HAZMAT) specialists were deployed. I wonder if the HAZMAT team has at least one Malay member, as the name suggests.

News article:

SCDF says no detection of gas in northern Singapore
Channelnews Asia
Saturday July 16, 10:17 PM

SINGAPORE : The smell of gas was reported in the northern part of Singapore between 5pm and 5.45pm on Friday.

Members of the public called the Singapore Civil Defence Force about the smell in Sembawang Crescent, Lagos Circle, Marsiling Drive and Woodlands Sector 1.

SCDF immediately deployed six emergency appliances and 25 personnel, including SCDF's Hazardous Materials (HAZMAT) Specialists.

However, investigations and on-site monitoring did not detect the presence of gas, and SCDF terminated its operation shortly after 8pm. - CNA/de

Harry Potter Castaway

2005-07-16T07:29:00.000-07:00

If Harry Potter ever crashes his Nimbus 2000 flying broomstick over the Pacific ocean and washes ashore on some remote uninhabited island ala Tom Hanks in Cast Away, this is what he will turn into.

When Harry Met Filly

2005-07-15T13:27:00.000-07:00

Having sex with a partner that is hoarse can be unpleasant due to the rough moans. But there is something worse than that. It is having sex with a partner that's a horse. A Seattle man actually died while doing this. Poor bastard. Was he sheepless in Seattle? What man would stoop so low (okay maybe not too low) to fuck a horse?
There is really no excuse for this kind of behaviour even if his wife or girlfriend betrayed him in this manner. Talk about a ~~horse-style~~ hostile takeover.

I hope that our Singapore taxi drivers do their sex in Geylang and horse-betting in Kranji and never mix up the two. If a taxi-driver is spotted in Geylang writing down the Thai fish-tank prostitutes' numbers on a betting slip, one shudders to think what he does at the Turf Club.

Here is the report from Seattle Times followed by some sound clips.

Enumclaw-area animal-sex case investigated

By Jennifer Sullivan
Seattle Times staff reporter
Friday July 15, 2005

King County sheriff's detectives are investigating the owners of an Enumclaw-area farm after a Seattle man died from injuries sustained while having sex with a horse boarded on the property.

Investigators first learned of the farm after the man died at Enumclaw Community Hospital July 2. The county Medical Examiner's Office ruled that the death was accidental and the result of having sex with a horse.

A surveillance camera picked up the license plate of the car that dropped the man off at the hospital, which led detectives to the farm and other people involved, said sheriff's Sgt. John Urquhart.

Deputies don't believe a crime occurred because bestiality is not illegal in Washington state and the horse was uninjured, said Urquhart.

But because investigators found chickens, goats and sheep on the property, they are looking into whether animal cruelty — which is a crime — was committed by having sex with these smaller, weaker animals, he said.

The farm was talked about in Internet chat rooms as a destination for people looking to have sex with livestock, he said.

"A significant number of people, we believe, have likely visited this farm," said Urquhart.

The Humane Society of the United States intends to use the case during the next state legislative session as an example of why sex with animals should be outlawed in Washington, said Bob Reder, a Humane Society regional director in Seattle.

"This and a few other cases that we have will allow us a platform to talk about sex abuse of animals," Reder said.

Thirty-three states ban sex with animals, he said.

Susan Michaels, co-founder of local animal-rights organization Pasado's Safe Haven, said she has been fighting to have bestiality made illegal. "It's animal cruelty behind closed doors," Michaels said.

End of article.

Following is fiction:
Police recovered a hidden tape recorder from the site and released these 2 sound clips of the horse.

At the beginning of the act: Clip1 (Curiosity)
When the horse finally realizes whats going on: Clip2 (Shock)

The title of this blog entry "When Harry Met Filly" plays on the movie "When Harry Met Sally". A filly is a young female horse.