Lobotomy Laboratory

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2008-11-21T07:24:00.003Z

Lazy to blog. Maybe I blog. Blog also short. Blog in facebook. Not here anymore. find me there. find yik yuin. Bye Bye Bye.

Because the Dalai Lama says so.

2008-02-14T18:44:00.002Z

Sleep is the best meditation.
-Dalai Lama-

Hell yeah! It is even approved by The D.L. To all of you who say that sleeping is a waste of time, SUCK ON THAT!

Randomly Random Post

2008-02-14T13:35:00.004Z

The things that affects us stand outside us.
Change your attitude and then, as a
ship entering harbour, you shall find calm.

-Marcus Aurelius

Yup, so I am at home eating porridge with fried eggs on Valentines Day because I got stood up for dinner. But that's okay, really. After a while you kinda get used to it. I'm not sure of what to write really, since I wasn't planning on doing any of it tonight but, life's like that, you know. so, anyway I was reading a book by Gwyneth Lewis about sailing in a yatch.

For those of you who don't know what 'parking' a ship is like, here's an idea. Bringing in a ship to 'park' is called marine pilotage and the people who do it are called Pilots.

Consider the folowing:

The marine pilot is trying to manoeuvre the largest movable man-made objects on earth.

He drives them down relatively narrower channels than the driver of a road transport is required to do.

It is not uncommon to have a 80,000-tonne displacement vessel powered by as little as 8,000 horse power. This equates to one horse power per 10,000 kg. Its a bit like having to drive a Mack truck and a semi trailer powered by a lawnmower engine and then park it in a parking place with a meter clearance at each end.

Now to make it interesting, let's simulate leeway drift [the effect of wind on a ship] by making the truck slide sideways at one km per hour, and the current by making the parking place move along the road. We'll give you two smaller side-on lawnmowers to help push the truck sideways into the curb but, like the truck they too are slipping and sliding.

Sounds too easy doesn't it? Lets add one more dimension: we won't give you any brakes, we'll make you slow the truck down by causing the wheel to spin backwards, and when you do so, you have to let go of the steering wheel, because large ships do not steer when going backwards.

Finally if you mess up, we'll throw you in court and make you justify why you should have a job.

Sounds like fun, innit?

________________________________

Take a look at the postsecret video. Its so cute.

I wish I knew how to fall out of love

A Fasting Rat

2008-02-03T16:49:00.000Z

After much deliberation and reflection, I have decided that I will go vegetarian from the Second day of Chinese New Year for one week.
To all of my friends, please do not tempt me by dangling 'bah kua' in front of my face.
I will kick you. In the crotch.

A Cup Of Drink At Night

2008-01-31T17:10:00.000Z

ML said this a while ago:

I like to stay awake at night
don't you think it's very peaceful?
like a cup of drink, everything has sunken to where it's supposed to be.

That is the most profound thing I've heard this week, and in a week of emotional stress and needless drama it was really a welcome relief.

How Much Is Too Much?

2008-01-31T01:33:00.000Z

I think got a few more pairs lying around, can't find them.

Where is my black Hi-cut? The damn cats must have dragged it away.

Must get a new black low cut soon. Should not have used it to play futsal.

I Need To Recover

2008-01-30T14:03:00.000Z

My heart hurts like fuck. I need to find peace within myself.

would sentul park give me my answer?

Crossroads

2008-01-27T11:22:00.000Z

There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at the crossroads.
Afraid, confused, without a road map.
The choices we make in those moments can define the rest our days.
Of course when faced with the unknown most of us prefer to turn around and go back.

But once in a while people push on to something better.
Something found just beyond the pain of going it alone.
And just beyond the courage and bravery to let someone in
Or to give someone a second chance
Something beyond the quiet persistence of a dream.

Because its only when you are tested that you truly discover who you really are.
And its only when you are tested you discover who you can be.
The person you want to be does exist, somewhere on the other side of hard work, and faith, and believe
and beyond the heartache and fear of what lies ahead.

-A little something taken from One Tree Hill-

I know why you did what you did, and I understand.

Am I The Rain Check Man?

2008-01-24T16:57:00.000Z

One of the many drawbacks of being a nice guy is people like to take you for granted.
Oh well, yuin will always be there. No worries, yuin will be okay with it. It's fine, yuin won't mind being stood up.
I'm sick of being taken for granted.
I'm sick of being push around with assumptious indifference.
I'm sick of being stood up.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my t-shirt that says 'I get an orgasm everytime you flake on me'.
I looked in the mirror but I did not see the 'stand me up and win a mystery prize' stamped on my forehead.
I checked my ID card and my name was not Rain Check.
So I am pretty curious on how is it you all are being so audaciously crass with taking me for granted.

No more.
Those of you, and you know who you are, who thinks 'oh its okay, yuin wouldn't keep it in his heart', you are right, I won't.
I'm just going to note it down in a little black book of mine and return each and every token of appreciation you've shown me, and maybe I'll give a little bit more. Why? Because its only right to return every gesture of goodwill shown to you by another man. And also because God says so.

sidenote: If I had a daughter and I named her Delilah, with my surname being Mah, I could not imagine how much she would hate me.

A New Year Post. Of Sorts

2008-01-21T18:41:00.000Z

I guess this is a long delayed new year post. My mind has been everywhere lately and its quite hard to write when you keep forgetting what is it you wanted to say 5 minutes ago. As far as new year resolutions go, making them would only result in me breaking all of them before the fireworks are over. I have a good feeling though, even if it might be a little early into the year to tell. There’s this valium induced calmness I’ve been feeling, as though everything is being slowed down to the point where I could scrutinize every moment and choice, poignant and otherwise.

It’s a slow steady slope upwards career wise. Job’s still satisfying enough to justify the pay. I can’t say that I’m really comfortable with where I am now, but I’m not complaining. My heart was broken twice last year, both times by the same person. Pain sometimes isn’t all that bad. If the right dosage is administered, it brings about perspective. It forces you to detach yourself from yourself so that you get a first person view of the third person view. In many ways, pain helps put you back on track and keeps you focused.

I’ve found that, especially through those around me that I’ve been a little too engrossed with investing in the happiness of others. I guess this year I’m going to try to invest a little more in mine. That does sound like a resolution, doesn’t it?

Apologies to those I’ve disappointed. I try to give as much within my power to live up to your expectations and if that is not enough then I’m sorry. If my work has been in way of friends and people I care about, again I’m sorry. I pledge to pledge my time back home for all of you. I will always be up for drinking sessions, you have my number.

Those who have wronged me, I forgive you. Hate takes up a lot of space. I have better things to put in my heart now. A word of caution though, removing hate requires removing everything associated with it so do not be surprised if you are removed as well.

Last but not least, to my friends and family who were there for me throughout the year even though I was away, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I’m better because of you.

Happy 2008.

Oh, by the way, this is a photo of the cup I’ve been using on board for 5 months. Never been washed since day one. Enjoy!

Sailors can be very artistic people too

Regarding Toll

2008-01-15T18:51:00.000Z

Aiyoh yoh tambi, tak boleh ini macam lah.

Is incest a crime in malaysia?

2008-01-15T17:30:00.000Z

Is incest a crime punishable by law(and I'm not talking about 'syariah' law) in Malaysia if both parties are adults and the sex is consensual?

...........................................................

Edit:
I was not in the country for a while but I didn't know about this until just now. They should extend the ban to cover all non muslims in malaysia instead of back tracking. That way us in Selangor would not need to sing the state song.

Abdullah Mohamad Zain, minister in the prime minister's department said the Cabinet at its meetings on October 18 and November 1 decided that the word Allah could only be used by Muslims to avoid confusion.

Abdullah said non-Muslims should use the word God ("Tuhan" in Malay) instead, although the word Allah has been used in the Malay-language Bible for centuries.

"The use of the word Allah by other religions may arouse sensitivity and create confusion among Muslims," he was quoted as saying by the Star newspaper Friday. -Yahoo! News-

YA ALLAH! APE DAH BERLAKU KAT NEGARA NIH?

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2008-01-15T15:21:00.000Z

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Bai

2007-07-30T08:28:00.000+01:00

Okay ah. I am going back to work the day after.
those who owe me money, please return to me as soon as possible.
Those whom I owe money, I don't.
Chiao.
See you in 2 years.

Peace out.

When I Was A Leetle Boy

2007-07-20T02:03:00.000+01:00

I was little. Literally. You could spot me out of the class line up photo by that little spot where someone's head ought to be. I was so little adults would tell me to shut up when ever I asked them a question. I compensated for this by being an obnoxious brat. Make no mistake, I was the cutest brightest kid on the block, but i was a hairless leetle goblin.
I always did really stupid things whenever I didn't get my way(I still do sometimes). I was a banger. I banged everything with my head. The floor, the walls, the kitchen cabinet, even mom's frying pan. I think that is why now I forget people's names and have shaky hands. No, masturbation does not cause that.
When I was three, I cycled 1km out to town on my tricycle without my parents realising it. Suffice to say that was one of the very few times I felt the cane caress my cute leetle(still virgin) butt. The whole neighbourhood came looking for me. They found me at the kedai runcit buying mamee. With a smile on my face. Dennis would've been so proud.
I was smart then though. By the age of one I could dial my dad's office number on the phone. I couldn't speak like an adult then though. This was a cause for pain to the office secretary who had to answer my call 2000 times a day.
Anyone who'd seen me would have definately found joy in pinching my cheeks then. I was THAT cute. I don't really know what happened between now and then though.

Of Differences And Barriers
I was a Chinese living in a totally Chinese community who couldn't speak a word of mandarin, cantonese and hokkien. Naturally this was cause enough for kids my age to alienate and avoid me. This was where I found my first love. Chiang Lau Tze(teacher) was my class kindergarten teacher. She was the only one patient enough to attend to my tantrums whenever chinese or mathematics lessons were around the corner. She would during her class come over to me and slowly explain what each word in Mandarin meant and took my hand as I tried to scribble my name, which till today, still looks like it was written by a nervous hen. I did pick up Hokkien in primary school though and Cantonese through my paternal grandma and thousands of hours of TVB serials(6-8pm, Mon-Thurs).
It got better though after that when I meet people of like mindedness who spoke english and throughout the six years of primary school did nothing but played kejar-kejar, buaya, police and thief and getah. Yes, in my school even the boys played getah.

Grades and Seriousness
My only real achievement in school was in standard three when I came in first. That obviously was a fluke because I almost always had 2 digit positions after that. Nobody told me we were suppose to go to school to study. The period I look forward to most in primary school was rehat. My favourite subject was Pendidikan Jasmani. My homework was playing galah panjang after school. I did become a prefect after standard 4 though, because I believed that being a prefectorial body helps shape character and build discipline. Thats the bullshit I tell the teachers during the interview. The two reasons why I joined was so that I could go for recess 10 minutes earlier and not go for assembly every morning. Do you know how hard it is to elbow your way through the canteen line during recess time? Its impossible if you were as tiny as me.
I finally realised in Secondary school that I had to shape up if I wanted to end up in a high ranking job where I get to push people around and sit with my legs on the desk. So I became a prefect too like before, using that as an excuse to skive classes I didn't like and go play Counterstrike at the friendly neighbourhood Internet Cafe. Counterstrike really contributed a LOT to my SPM results. We played 1 month before the exams, 3 days before the exams, and even after each paper. I got 6As. I regretted not playing more.

The Popularity Scale.
7-9am : Breakfast at Bah Kut Teh stall near school.
9.30 : Recess.
10-12 : Sleeping in the Prefectorial Boardroom.
12-3pm : Counterstrike.
3.30 : lunch.
4-7 : Tuition(Counterstrike at the Internet Cafe Downstairs)
7-11 : Get rid of ciggarette smell, go home and pretend to be filial son.

Saturday: Scout, Counterstrike.
Sunday: Sleep, Counterstrike.

Popularity? There was no time for it.

Thanks Gina for the meme.

Have You Seen A Pink Smurf Around Here?

2007-07-06T06:13:00.000+01:00

Haih. People and their memes ah I tell you.

5 things found in my bag:

bag? what bag?

5 favourite things in my room:

my bed, my modem, my laptop, my chair and my porn star

5 ~~things~~ people you've always wanted to do:

Jenna Jameson, Jessica Alba, Hilarie Burton, Timothy Tiah and Kenny Sia.

5 things you're currently into:

I'm into sleeping very much. I'm so obsessed I spend almost 8 hours a day doing it I practically don't have time for anything else.

5 people I want to tag:

Niamah. I can't believe I'm doing this tag. Lets make fun of the Chinese instead.

Does this mean I would end up with a whole bunch of credit cards that belong to other people at the end of the day?

The Chinese Government is very keen on helping foreigners understand Mandarin.

There's nothing wrong with this but I will always interpret this as: Women's Gate. No Way Out.

Is there any other way?

Stem what? Against where?

How much? Do you accept Visa?

The 'books' and 'teacher' will cost a little bit more.

This is just too ambigious.

Don't what? Piss? Shit? Puke?

Really Wrong too.

Can you count how many franchises' copyright has mr. Lee violated?

What constitutes supermarket food?

Naikee. 'We also can do it'

They're afraid you'd queue uncounciously.

Giggle.

And this is how a goldfish looks like when you leave it out of the bowl for too long.

Beijing very Nice

2007-06-27T14:00:00.000+01:00

I just come back flom beijing.

Beijing veli nice.

The place I stay also veli nice.

My neighbours talk veli nice things to me.

Only the visitors veli suck.

They shout at my neigbours and bang the glass and throw things into our cage.

If you go to visit me and my friends in beijing, plaese lemember that WE are suppose to be the animals, not you.

Armitage Skanks

2007-06-20T12:41:00.000+01:00

Damnit. I just bit my tongue.

Moral of the day: never chew while running down the stairs.

Holiday

2007-06-17T13:06:00.000+01:00

When one goes on a holiday the first thing one would photograph would be the room and the hotel scenery. Not us. There was not a single photo from BOTH photographers of the rooms we stayed in. We very artistic, what to do. What we did have in abundance though, was photos like these:

and these:

one to satisfy the criteria for artistic photography license:

and one for food enthusiast certification:

One for the guys to salivate at:

And even though we did not have many pictures like this:

and this:

We were satisfied and happy because we had loads of fun:

Where was I? Behind the lens of course. If you haven't already figured out from the photos yet, we stayed at the Legend Water Chalets Port Dickson

On Moving On

2007-06-10T17:56:00.000+01:00

I've finally found the courage and strength to do what is right today.
Thank you for being there for me all this while and I'll learn to move on, so don't worry about me.
Just remember what I told you to remember.

Golden Compass!!!!

2007-06-06T01:20:00.000+01:00

Fanfuckingtastic! Philip Pullman's His Dark Material Trilogy: The Golden Compass is coming out in December!
I'm looking forward to seeing Lyra's Daemon, Pantalaimon in action.
Eva green plays the witch Serafina Pekkala somemore. Sweet!

You'll Never Sleep Alone

2007-06-04T15:00:00.000+01:00

I caught Tsai Ming-Liang’s I Don't Want To Sleep Alone in its last day of screening at GSC Cineleisure. It might be an art movie open to interpretation but there is a very deep profound fundamental moral message Tsai wants to get out to us. I think what he really wanted to tell us is Not to have sex in the haze and always bring a torchlight to an abandoned building site. That is all.

I Dreamt Of Gargoyles and Neil Gaiman

2007-05-30T08:31:00.000+01:00

I had this wierdest dream yesterday.

I dreamt I was driving back from Midvalley in the morning at 140 km/hour in my 2 day old Myvi and not realising it.

Then I reached home and did nothing but watched Season 1 of scrubs the whole afternoon.

All that time the only thing on my mind was making sure I'd remember to make it to Baskin Robbins tomorrow early in the morning.

Oh wait. It wasn't a dream. Damn its boring being paid on holiday.

Edit: I spelt weird in the first paragraph wrongly. It should've been spelt weird and not wierd. The error is much regretted.

Sex with a Kinetophobic

2007-05-19T17:38:00.000+01:00

How does one go about having sex with a kinetophobic?

Blood

2007-05-17T11:12:00.000+01:00

What does it feel like to cut someone’s throat? The shiny surface of the blade glinting slightly as it catches the light when angled to press against the skin? You notice how big the pores are on the cheek, the slight facial hair beneath the ear raised in response to the fear mechanism? The jugular surfaces as the head is pull right back by the person’s hair? It pulses and vibrates irregularly with each breathe and quiver? Skin breaks when pressure is applied to the blade? Pulling the knife in one successive move skin folds back from tension where the edge of blade touches? Blood continue to stain the blade as it is glided across the neck from one side to the other? Screaming dawdles unhurriedly to muffled moans and is abruptly replaced by spastic gurgling as blood drowns the esophagus? The initially squirting dwindles to a trickle as blood starts to drain from the brain? The eyes blinking ferociously at first remains flaccidly open as the pupils dilate? All the flopping and movement stops as the brain finally dies from asphyxiation?