David Grabstald says...

I Had a Wonderful Time!

2009-07-05T21:21:00.000-07:00

I think we often spend too much time worrying about what we don't have as opposed to what we do have. Like tying our shoes, the good stuff in our lives might pass us right by if we don't stop to take the time to take notice.

Take this weekend for example. July 4th weekend, to be exact. Friday, which I had off, was spent doing the usual packing, cleaning my new condo, getting my hair "did", and paying bills online. On Friday evening, however, I went to meet my friend Kent and his partner as they had invited me to go with them to Sonoma to stay with Kent's mom at her lovely home in Sonoma for the weekend.

This was a nice change of pace, because in previous years, I'd be reduced to trying to watch fireworks with friends on the rood of someone's home. The only problem was that watching fireworks through the usual San Francisco fog bank wasn't really ideal.

So the point of all this is that if you're invited to do something fun for a weekend, or try something new, for goodness sakes, try...because you may not get the chance again.

Here are some fun places I visited and people I met while in Sonoma and Sebastapol (in no particular order):

Laurel Begley Ceramics: amazing ceramics from various artists in a converted barn

BeeKind: yummy stuff made out of honey as well as candles and more bee stuff

The Girl & The Fig: cozy bar and restaurant with lively outdoor patio and yummy food

Tim Chadsey: Amazing printmaker I met during the Sonoma Fourth of July Parade

Peter Lowells: Organic restaurant with a cool vibe an great food and live music from singer Amity Eliaz

Michael, Farrah, Ed and a Surprise Singing Engagement

2009-06-28T22:08:00.000-07:00

It's Sunday night, and I'm sitting on the floor of the sleeping alcove in my new studio condo in downtown San Francisco. Frankly, I miss my Nob apartment of seven years, one my friends used to refer to as the Plaza Hotel apartment due to it's size and, in their own words, elegance. Moving into a 520-square foot apartment in a historic building, from a nearly 1000-square foot apartment has been interesting, but that's another blog, for another time.

Before I get to the singing engagement, let me just say rest in peace to Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon, who died recently, and in my opinion, way too soon.

As part of the fun festivities with friends this past weekend, including a performance by the San Francisco Symphony and Bernadette Peters (outstanding!), I went to a great piano bar called Martunis last night to meet friends for a drink and listen to various folks warble show tunes in the back piano lounge. After some liquid courage, I was persuaded to get up and sing something. Both of my parents have singing voices of varying degrees, so I thought what the heck. Up I went to sing "Mama's Good to You" from Chicago. Using the lessons learned from singing classes taken at the New Conservatory Theater, I suppose everything went well, especially when I forgot the lyrics and began to improvise.

Which brings me to the point of this blog, which is to say that it's sometimes fun to just have fun and not care what other people think. If you want to get up and sing, do it. Think you can paint? Try! Want to earn a college degree? Go for it! If you don't try, how will you know what you could have accomplished?

What is ITEC?

2009-04-24T22:16:00.000-07:00

Here's a great video I helped produce for the ITEC department at San Francisco State University. The audio track was all me...

A Letter from Brooke Astor

2009-04-20T19:25:00.000-07:00

While going through my collection of books at the end of my apartment's entryway last weekend, I came across a slim volume entitled "A Birthday for Brooke" in honor of the late New York socialite Brooke Astor's 90th birthday in 1992.

With the Brooke Astor case getting under way, it's nice to read what Mrs. Astor wrote in her letter about her thought about life. With all the evidence at the trial partially focused on her signature, I was surprised and happy to find that Mrs. Astor had signed two different letters she sent me over a month-long period in 1996.

I'd written the Vincent Astor Foundation after seeing Mrs. Astor appear on both "Nightline" and A&E Biography to tell her how marvelous it was she was so active in her 90s and could she tell me about how she kept going, when most people at her age would have taken things a bit easier.

Her response?

"I believe that the key to life is to find a good balance between work and leisure. Working hard gives one focus and goals. With your training in journalism, promotion, and fundraising, you will always be able to find good positions. Taking time off for recreation and begin with family and friends is important too. I am sure that you will be able to find a good balance in life and send all good wishes for your success. Sincerely, Brooke Astor (signed)"

Enough said...

Something to Think About!

2009-04-08T19:28:00.001-07:00

I've been reading a great book for one of my master's degree classes called "A Whole New Mind: Why Right-Brainers Will Rule the Future" by Daniel Pink.

In his chapter about "meaning", there were a couple of passages I'd thought I'd share:

"Say thanks. Gratitude works. Feelings of gratitude enhance well-being and deepen one's sense of meaning...think of a gratitude visit. You think of a person in your life who has been kind or generous to you but whom you've never properly thanked. You write a detailed "gratitude letter" to that person, explaining in concrete terms why you're grateful. Then you visit that person and read the letter aloud."

And,

"Take the 20-10 Test. Would you still do what you're doing now if you had $20 million in the bank or knew you had no more than 10 years to live? For example, if you inherited $20 million, no strings attached, would you spend your days the way you spend them now? If you knew you had at most 10 years to live, would you stick with your current job? If the answer is no, that ought to tell you something. This test alone can't determine your life course. But the approach is smart, and the answers can be clarifying."

Communication Tip at Work: Don't Be A Tattletale!

2009-03-08T10:39:00.000-07:00

One tip that will help you survive in the corporate jungle is to listen a lot and speak with people professionally in case you have any questions, concerns, or issues. Additionally, you must learn to gauge when to escalate an issue to your boss, or if speaking with the person directly is a better option.

Example: Person A listens to music while they’re working. Instead of using headphones, they turn the volume very low and assume it doesn’t bother their co-workers. Rather that ask Person A to use headphones, Person B goes to Person A’s boss to complain about the noise.

If this has been an issue before, this might be a good option. If not, a better solution would be for Person B to speak with Person A directly (in private) to ask if they would please use headphones. Person A will respect Person B for their professionalism. Many office relationships have been damaged by what has been called the “tattletale syndrome” or passive-aggressive behavior. How would you feel if one of your co-workers went to your boss first as opposed to speaking with you directly? Not good, right?

Bosses usually have a lot of work on their agenda and may prefer you try and work out smaller issues you have with co-workers on your own. If you’re comfortable doing so, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask someone to speak with you directly first before speaking with your boss.

The Charles Schulz Philosophy

2009-02-20T07:13:00.000-08:00

The following is the philosophy of Charles Schulz, the creator of the 'Peanuts' comic strip.

You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just ponder on them. Just read the e-mail straight through, and you'll get the point.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America pageant.

4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.

5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.

6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.

2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.

3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.

4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special!

5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

Easier?

The lesson:

The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials... the most money... or the most awards. They simply are the ones who care the most!

Pass this on to those people who have made a difference in your life, like I did.

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia !"

"Be Yourself, Everyone Else Is Taken!"

Lots Going On at the Zoo!

2009-02-06T13:52:00.000-08:00

Birds do it. Bees do it. Even educated fleas do it. With Mother’s Day upon us, there’s been a lot of “doing it” going on over at the San Francisco Zoo, with several mothers-to-be anxiously awaiting their bundles of joy. And, we’re not just talking about the zoo’s five pregnant zookeepers.
With a face, and for that matter a body only a mother could love, the Marabou Stork is the largest of all storks with a wingspan of more than eight feet. Currently a member of this species is “with child,” or more precisely, “with egg,” at the Zoo.
According to the National Zoological Society, “Marabou Stork nests are placed in trees or occasionally on cliff ledges. Though nest locations can be reused every year, the nest itself usually requires extensive renovations. The completed nesting platform is a structure of coarse sticks lined with twigs and leaves.” Two to three white eggs are laid in the nest and incubate for nearly a month, with both parents feeding the young by regurgitating food to them. Yummy.
Also “expecting” is the national bird of the United States, none other than the majestic Bald Eagle. Several Bald Eagle chicks have already hatched and over a dozen more are on the way. This is especially good news for the zoo and its Bald Eagle Restoration Project, which began in 1985 to help increase the number of this species in the wild.
According to a representative from the Zoo, “The population of breeding Bald Eagles in California declined from a historic high of approximately 400 pairs to fewer than 35 pairs in the 1970s. The Zoo’s off-exhibit captive breeding facility for Bald Eagles is home to seven pairs of bald eagles. Since 1991, more than 100 bald eagles produced by the breeding pairs have been released in central and southern California.”
Their nests might not be what Nob Hill residents would call cozy, but they’re rather impressive at nearly eight feet across and weighing about a ton. And unlike some Nob Hill couples, Bald Eagles mate for life.
While all birds can’t be the national bird, they can be successful parents. Take the Magellanic Penguin. The San Francisco Zoo has one of the most successful breeding colonies of Magellanic penguins in captivity, fledging more than 150 chicks in the last 20 years. One pair of chicks has already hatched, and zookeepers are expecting more.
Zookeepers mention that, “During the breeding season, these birds gather in large nesting colonies, digging burrows underground or making shallow nests under bushes with 20 nests per 100 square meters. They vacate their nest sites in winter, but use them again each year. Penguins are generally long lived and may go through 20 or more breeding cycles in a lifetime. They lay two eggs, but generally raise only one chick to adulthood. Both parents care for the chicks, taking turns finding food and regurgitating it for their young.”
That certainly gives new meaning to making sure the kids are well fed, doesn’t it? But whatever the species, mothers and their offspring will always share a special bond on Mother’s Day.

So You're Feeling Down?

2009-02-05T23:50:00.000-08:00

A friend these stories to be recently, so thought I'd share. Enjoy!

"In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 am regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11:00 am Sunday, so a worldwide team of experts were assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents. The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 am all of the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits. Just when the clock struck 11:00 am, Kenneth Roberts, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.

Still Having a Bad Day????

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez Oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.00. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers.

A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.

Still think you are having a Bad Day????

Betty came home to find Jerry in the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in two places.

Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

Are Ya OK Now? - No?

Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn , Germany . Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly. The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.

What?!? STILL having a Bad Day????

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb.
It came back with 'Return to Sender' stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.

There now, feeling better, are we?"

25 Things About Me...

2009-02-05T23:49:00.001-08:00

1) I've sung live onstage with Patti Labelle. The actual lady herself, not just an impersonator.

2) I used to be a news producer for NBC

3) I always wanted to live in New York, but ended up in San Francisco (which isn't too bad!)

4) I love cars, but haven't owned one in more than ten years. When I was 16, my grandfather bought a 1957 Thunderbird, which he used to let me drive on Sundays.

5) Despite loving to eat healthy, I adore Popeye's Chicken, Chipotle, and Taco Bell.

6) Painting abstract paintings is something I love to do for friends. Now if I could sell them, that would be marvelous!

7) I've flown alone with John Wayne on a Falcon jet my dad was flying when I lived in Southern California. He asked me who I was and I told him "David". He asked what I did for a living and I said, "I'm a little boy." I asked him what he did for a living and he replied, "I'm a cowboy!"

8) I've been to a psychic and don't recall what she said, but my mom went to one who told her I'd be a millionaire. Now if I could just remember when she said that would happen.

9) I'm in my last semester of getting my master's degree in instructional design.

10) I love to dance. Hit the clubs, throw me up on stage, and I'm ready to go! Mind you, nothing go-go implied, but the moves are there!

11) My first crushes were the flight attendants that used to serve me dinner when I'd fly to New York in first class on Braniff Airlines in the 1970s. My dad was a captain for them....

12) I attended MTV's Summer of Love Tour in 1990 in Dallas. Paula Abdul and Milli Vanilli live in person...Well, almost live and in person....

13) My writing has been featured in several magazines, newspapers, and blogs. Frankly, I was born to write! Now let a syndicate and/or great editor find me and ask me to write a column or book!

14) I wrote a weekly real estate column for nearly three years

15) Baking yummy desserts is something I do really well.

16) Working on putting together a speaking series to inspire and help people with their careers! Look forward to hitting the speaking circuit!

17) I love to go shopping in Santa Barbara and Montecito. It's a wonderful place to visit.

18) Road trips and I get along really well.

19) I speak conversational Spanish

20) I'd love to take a comedy workshop as I can tell jokes really well

21) Giving to various charities in both San Francisco and Fort Worth are two of my passions. There is always someone in need who you can help.

22) I've never been to Hawaii, owned a new car, or bought a puppy or kitten.

23) There isn't a day goes by that I don't think about my grandparents. I miss them...

24) My soulmate is out there somewhere....still working on that one...

25) Buying art from unknown artists to add to my collection is a favorite pasttime.

Changes

2009-01-21T20:20:00.000-08:00

I used to like change. Thought it was a good thing. Change in my surroundings, certain friends, or even extra change I found in my jeans three weeks after I'd worn them. Lately, there have been several changes that I've noticed which are not appreciated. For example:

1) My favorite video store is closing after being in business for 17 years. Okay, Okay, I know Netflix is great, but there is something wonderful about getting the human, in-person feedback from a woman with hair that's been dyed purple and a chic goth girl whom I simply adore.

2) My favorite yoga instructor is moving to the East Coast to work on his doctorate in Philosophy, which is fine, but it sure doesn't help my "limber factor" very much. I've known Jamie for nearly 10 years, and he's one of the best yogis in San Francisco. I love his yoga classes, but commuting to the East Coast might just be a bit too much, even for me.

3) Everyone is always busy. Busy, busy, busy. I used to talk to my friends in person. Then we started to just email each other. Now it's down to text messages back and forth. Soon we might even try telepathy. I'm waiting to attend a party where friends don't speak to each other but just text back and forth.

4) Friends and I used to host games nights at our homes. Scrabble was a favorite. Now we're playing Scrabble with each other on Facebook rather than in person. Something odd about that.

5) In my 20s, the oldest people I knew were my grandparents and I really didn't know anyone who had died. Now my grandparents are dead, the owner of a sushi restaurant down the street from my apartment was murdered, and a really nice guy one aisle over from me at work, whom I just chatted with last week, committed suicide on Saturday. Sad.

6) Two family members both have emphysema; one has quit smoking, the other continues to puff away despite having a difficult time breathing and lung cancer in remission. She mentioned to me one day she wasn't feeling well. I told her that perhaps smoking for more than 50 years might do that to a person. Originally, I was worried about her alcohol intake, but at this point, her motto is simply, "F-ck It!" I tend to agree with her, and figure she might as well continue drinking because at this point her liver is fine. It's the lungs that are shot.

7) As family members get older, which is a big change, it's nice to know that we can help them with simple tasks around the house. One really has to ask, otherwise out of pride, they may not let you know what they need done. My task, for an aunt and uncle in Texas, is to wean them off of using 150-watt bulbs in their home and switch to energy-saving fluorescent bulbs and help with simple chores around the house. I'm happy to do it, but if I didn't, I'm not sure anyone else would.

8) Yes, at long last, we have a new President. That's a great change.

Woes of Sales: Bargains Bring Back Memories

2009-01-19T17:26:00.000-08:00

Here's a column I wrote back in 1990, shortly after my Aunt Lee died. I recently found the article again, and thought I'd share:

"Estate sales have always been interesting to me. This weekend I went to an estate sale in a rather snooty neighborhood near my home. Having very little to do with on a Saturday morning, I wearily dragged myself out of bed and went to the sale.

The fact of the matter is, I was going to an aunt's house. Not that she was there, of course. She had been dead for several months. But she was there in spirit. It seemed strange to rummage through all of her pots and pans, furniture, clothing, tools, toiletries, sewing machines, jewelry, and an incredible assortment of estate sale junk.

My aunt would turn over in her grave is she knew how much the auctioneers were selling her valuables for. An antique tapestry for $125, a leather ottoman for $325, and velvet-covered chairs for $395 apiece. What was really sad was that on my budget, I couldn't buy the higher priced items.

So, off I went to hunt for cheaper items, er, bargains, with my handy faux-leather checkbook in tow. My conscience said, "Exercise self-control." My body said, "Spend money like there is no tomorrow." Tomorrow came sooner than I thought.

The first Item I bid on was a coffee cup. Not an ordinary coffee cup, mind you. It was a rare and valuable coffee cup from the days of a prosperous, successful Braniff Airways. Rare indeed.

Next item to catch my attention was a stained=gass candle holder. This was no ordinary candle holder,either. If you turn the lights out and light the candle, the entire room is showered with a brilliant array of color. "Fabulous. A necessary item in every home," I said. "Junk," said the gentleman purchasing the set of pink glasses with naked women on them sitting next to me.

But the "piece de resistance" has to be the Moroccan water pipe I discovered in a guest bedroom off the main foyer. Where, I pondered, did she get a water pipe? Matter of fact, what did she use it for? My inquiring mind wanted to know. After several phone calls I discovered it was a decorative piece in the bedroom. Yeah, that's the ticket.

So there I was in an entrance hall, standing among strangers, admiring my priceless artifacts, when a strange thought occurred to me: Have I ever taken the time to see who comes to these sales? Obviously, I did.

Several teachers from my high-school were buying up a storm. One of them wrote a $300 check. Nothing unusual, except this was the same English teacher who preached to her students to save their money and never spend frivolously. I was not in one of her classes.

As I wandered out into the front yard and meandered to my car, tears welled in my eyes. This was the last time I would come to this house. The new owners had hired people to renovate the house. The changes were nice, but I missed the way it used to look. My aunt loved to cook and hated to clean. The house was always dirty. it had a nice lived-in feel to it. She had several cats who loved to sink their claws into the furniture and relieve themselves under beds.

ONe particular memory stuck out in my mind. Because she rarely cleaned the master bedroom, a rather thick layer of dust and cobwebs accumulated. My parents and grandparents would always warn me never open the door leading into the room. My imagination ran wild so, from the age of five, I believed there was a horrible monster lurking beneath the adjustable beds.

Driving home, I assured myself before I die, I am going to have a garage sale to end all garage sales and sell most of my belongings, or maybe just give them to charity. That way, I get the price I want.

Besides, who wants to pay an estate sale auctioneer 30 percent commission?"

The Office Cold

2009-01-06T20:58:00.000-08:00

I finally got my first cold of 2009.

Perhaps it's payback from the powers that be, as I'd been laughing off the fact that I hadn't gotten a cold the last two weeks of 2008, when I'd finally had a much needed two-week vacation.

Luckily, I didn't get sick during the vacation: No cold during a road trip to Los Angeles to have lunch on Melrose with my friend Cody. No cold during my New Year's Eve visit to Santa Barbara to spend time with my friend Loren and his new wife Krista. No cold driving through the rain in an adorable rented Mini Cooper back to San Francisco on Friday.

But gosh darn it if on Saturday afternoon, during which I paid bills online, organized my closet and desk, went to the gym (a back and bicep day), and then ran some errands it finally hit me. I thought I was just a bit run down from the cold weather or working out, but no, by Sunday morning I was moaning in bed (alone), with a box of Kleenex with lotion by my bed, along with some organic chicken soup cooking on my kitchen stove.

Someone had mentioned to me once that the best cure for a cold is to stay in bed and do nothing except sleep and get up to make and drink lots of hot lemon water. They forgot to mention go to the bathroom with this remedy, but oh well. Anyway, I did stay in bed most of Sunday, but managed to watch several movies I'd rented or bought recently, including "Spirited Away" and "The Color Purple" (which I've already seen about a dozen times). Monday morning soon arrived, and I managed to drag myself to work, where it was nice to know most people weren't happy being there, due to having to come back to work from vacation.

Since Monday, the dreaded office cold has erupted up and down the aisles. First, it was the senior manager of the department. Then the lady sitting next to me, and finally the other lady across the aisle. Sniffling, sneezing, stuffy head, fever, so we do need to rest and get our medicine! It amazes me when one person is sick and they still come to work to get their work done. Please, do us all a favor and stay home. I don't want to catch your Flu, Mono, Pink eye, or other annoying condition.

Read my lips.....STAY HOME! Now where is my Kleenex with lotion?

Time to Recycle: Consider Donating

2009-01-05T22:37:00.000-08:00

Another thought as we enter 2009. Every year, I try to donate or recycle items in my home which I haven't used in at least one year. Usually, the clothes in my closet fall into this category, as well as various items in my kitchen and lining my bookshelves. What I was curious about were all the electronic items I no longer use: dvd players, old iPods, stereos, etc. In addition to donating them to various charities, including Goodwill, I found an interesting article recently from Consumer Reports which included some very useful hints and links to recycle electronic items. Below is a portion of that article, courtesy of consumerreports.org:

"If you have an obsolete but working computer, digital camera, cell phone, why not donate it to a local or national charity or other nonprofit organization? In many cases, you'll be able to deduct the contribution from your taxes.

A good place to start is with local schools and community centers, and charities such as Goodwill Industries and the Salvation Army. You might also try a nonprofit organization like Recycle for Breast Cancer (www.recycleforbreastcancer.org), which accepts a wide range of working and nonworking electronic items, and even mails prepaid postage labels for most product categories. Sites such as TechSoup (www.techsoup.org), Earth 911 (www.earth911.org), and Consumer Reports' Greener Choices (www.greenerchoices.org) can provide you with lists of nonprofit choices. Another site, Freecycle (www.freecycle.org) lets you find a local neighborhood group that will help you find a new home for your unwanted electronic items.

Before you recycle or donate an old computer, be sure to reformat all hard drives or use a dedicated program designed to erase personal data. You should also delete stored numbers and personal information from any cell phones you donate or recycle, and make sure your service has been deactivated.

WHAT YOU CAN DO

Whether the law mandates that manufacturers pay for recycling, or whether consumers pay a recycling fee when making a purchase, consumers ultimately foot the bill. Voluntary recycling programs might help prevent costly legislative mandates. Here are the steps we recommend you take if you decide to recycle an old TV or computer:

Check with retailers. If the equipment still works, or if you think it can be repaired, check with local thrift stores. You might not want that big old tube TV, but someone else will. If you can't find a thrift store willing to take it, find out if any local charities might be interested. Some of the sites listed in this report include links to groups that accept donated electronics. Electronics retailers are also getting into the act. Best Buy sponsors recycling events where you can drop off electronics of all kinds, from TVs to fax machines. Check their Web site to see if there is an upcoming event in your neighborhood.

Check for public programs. To see if your town sponsors collection days for TVs and other electronics, or if it has a drop-off point for electronics waste, click on the map supplied by the Electronic Industries Alliance (www.eiae.org). You can also find recyclers and recycling events in your area, and locate energy- efficient or environmentally friendlier "green" electronics, by visiting my GreenElectronics (www.mygreenelectronics.com), sponsored by the Consumer Electronics Association (CEA).

Consider a private recycling firm. You can also take your electronics directly to a private recycling company. But some disreputable recyclers simply ship waste overseas instead of recycling it, according to Richard Goss, director of environmental affairs for the EIA. In response to this concern, a coalition of environmental groups recently established a voluntary program known as the Electronics Recycler's Pledge of True Stewardship. Companies signing the pledge agree to prevent the export of hazardous computer components to developing countries, the disposal of waste equipment in municipal landfills and incinerators not equipped to handle it, and the use of prison labor. To locate a recycler in your area that has signed the pledge, go to the Computer TakeBack Campaign Web site (www.computertakeback.com/the_solutions/recyclers_map.cfm)."

Happy New Year! 2009!

2009-01-04T09:19:00.000-08:00

First complaint of 2009, other than I'm already ready for the next holiday season!

I'm sitting in my bedroom, staring at the ceiling listening to my upstairs neighbor stomp around getting ready for work. It's not like this is something new, as I've been listening to his stomping for more than a year. He insists he's quiet and always keeps his shoes off, but the shoes have nothing to do with the noise, rather, it's his walk.

My landlord, a rather affable man, is content to let us work the noise issue out ourselves, suggesting I call the police is it's that bad. I wish he'd be a more hands-on person. The thing that is most annoying is that his closet is directly above my bedroom, and because he keeps nightclub hours, he's always running into and out of the closet at all hours of the day and night dropping his shoes on the floor to change his clothes. The worst part is that this is the one room in his apartment where there is no carpet, so the noise is like a sonic boom in my apartment. Every time I try to ask politely for him to keep the noise down, or perhaps install a rug, he usually screams he's not making any noise. Very mature. Interestingly, my horoscope reads, "You have remarkable powers of concentration. Even though you're practically living in a three-ring circus and noise is audible everywhere (it even permeates your bedroom) you stay focused and centered." That's good to know!

Speaking of 2009, this is my first post in the new year, and I wasn't really sure what to write about. The upcoming inauguration, the financial crisis, what to wear on my first day back from vacation, what paintings I'm going to work on and give to friends and submit to a gallery, trying to submit queries for magazine articles to various editors, and dust mites are all in my conscience at the moment. I suppose I'm most curious about dust mites at the moment, after reading all sort of articles and watching cleaning shows telling me about the little buggers and how I must vacuum my bedroom often and change my sheets and pillow cases to keep them at bay. Who knew? Apparently they feed on our dead skin cells and their poo makes us prone to allergic reactions, etc. Yuck! Since my old vacuum cleaner recently died, I decided to buy a new HEPA vacuum from Hoover, which is supposed to help suck the little nuisances into one of its four filters.

2008 seemed to be the year that everyone seemed to be "busy" and complaining about how much money they'd lost in the financial market meltdown. Yet these same folks were the ones who were traveling to exotic locales. Isn't that a bit of a budget buster, too? Friends who were couples broke up, and several started dating new people right away. I dated a very special someone, whom I'm still friends with thankfully, but have not found the next new special someone yet, although several people have asked (the ones that look like Gollum from the "Lord of the Rings" series). No, I'm not going to be their "precious."
Usually the people I meet are from other cities or even countries. Why is it I can't meet a nice someone in San Francisco? Surely in such a cosmopolitan city there is someone out there. Fingers crossed!

So while waiting for the right one to come along, I suppose I'll keep painting abstracts and writing, working on finishing up my master's degree in instructional design (woo hoo) and try to get more freelance writing work, which I really do miss. It's not that there isn't any work out there, it's just that the competition is fierce, and editors seem to like to use only people they know, rather than taking a chance on an amazing writer like myself (selfless plug...lol). But, at least I've been thinking of freelance writing again, which hasn't happened in some time. Plus, blogging has been rather fun. Fingers crossed again that lots of people read it and advertisers want to advertise on it. Not a bad idea for 2009!

Happy New Year!

BIrthday Party Excuses

2008-12-17T15:02:00.000-08:00

My birthday was last week. A dinner. A cocktail party afterward at a favorite bar.

What surprised me most was the number of people who arrived at the bar exactly on time. I was 20 minutes late. Some people didn't stick around. Doesn't the birthday boy get to be a little bit late?

But for those people who said they were coming who never showed up, don't call me the next day letting me know why you weren't there. Instead, tell me what you bought me as my birthday gift!

Gifts That Give Back

2008-12-02T21:27:00.000-08:00

In a country with so much, it's often difficult to give a gift, or at least know what to give your friends and family.

Despite our great prosperity, even in a recession, there are still millions of other people around the world who barely have the bare necessities of life. With that in mind, I wanted to post a great article I found in "The Green Guide" magazine (www.thegreenguide.com). It contains several suggested ways to give a gift that truly matters this holiday season:

"For those loved ones who are notoriously hard to shop for, consider making donations in their name, picking organizations devoted to causes they care about. A modest donation may seem inconsequential, but as little as $20 can contribute to substantial improvements in the environment and the lives of people around the world.

In Ethiopia, AHOPE for Children provides care, housing and schooling for 60 HIV-positive children and has plans under way to care for at least 40 more. Funded entirely by donations, the International Rhino Foundation has brought Africa's black rhino population up to nearly 4,000 in 2007 from 2,500 in 2002. You can even give the gift of microloans. A $25 gift certificate at Kiva.org can be spent on loans to entrpreneurs in developing countries.

Here are a handful of charities that will turn your dollar gift into material change.

* Gifts to the International Rhino Foundation go toward saving rhino species in Africa and Asia (rhinos-irf.org)

* Help protect animals on the World Conservation Union Red List of Threatened Animals with a gift to Art for the Animals, and receive a piece of local art in exchange (artfortheanimals.org)

* Donations to AHOPE for Children help fund orphanages for HIV-afflicted children in Ethiopia (ahopeforchildren.org)

* Mercy Corps funds aid programs in regions torn by wars or devastated by natural disasters (mercycorps.org)

* Purchase gift animals through Heifner International for families in need around the world. A flock of chicks supplies eggs for a family in Cameroon ($20), and a pig can provide food and income to the smallest of farms ($120; heifer.org)

* Through Oxfam America Unwrapped, donors can choose from over 50 gifts. A pair of sheep, and their wool, allow people to make textiles and generate income ($90; oxfamamericaunwrapped.com)"

Vicoletto

2008-12-01T20:56:00.000-08:00

Vicoletto
550 Green St
San Francisco, CA 94133
(415) 433-5800
Category: Italian
Neighborhood: North Beach/Telegraph Hill
4 stars (out of 5)

My first impressions of this place were good. Friendly service, fun atmosphere (there was another birthday celebration going on behind us), and good Italian fare make me want to come back for more.

The pecorino with salad, calamari, and other appetizers were filling and would make a nice meal unto themselves. I did not like two of the three Italian wines we tried, one smelled like poo, the other was too peppery for my taste.

My main course of chicken rolled with pecorino, Italian ham, and spinach was delicious, served over some mashed spuds.

Dessert included a tiramisu for our birthday girl, which was really quite good. And, the interior design was modern and new, but the bathrooms could use a bit more cleaning.

A TALE OF TWO COMPANIES (AND VISITS TO NEW YORK)

2008-12-01T19:27:00.000-08:00

A TALE OF TWO COMPANIES (AND VISITS TO NEW YORK)
After graduating college with a degree in broadcasting, in the early 1990s, I didn’t really know what I wanted to do. Months of driving around Texas to various television stations left me with an empty tank of gas, little money in the bank, and a lot of rejection from news directors. Ethnic reporters were “in”, and I was just too white with too little experience and nobody willing to give me a chance.

So, one afternoon, I wrote down a list of all the companies I wanted to work for as well as listed of all the people I knew that worked in the same city as those companies, whom I could use to network and see if they had any contacts I could, well, contact.

Viacom, the parent company of both MTV networks and VH-1, was at the top of my list. If I wasn’t going to work as a news reporter, I could darn well work as an entertainment reporter, producer, or coffee maker in New York. The details of how I was going to afford to live there, or even where I was going to live, hadn’t entered the picture yet. I just knew I needed to move and would regret not trying!

MTV Networks

I wrote a letter to the chairman of Viacom, Sumner Redstone, who in turn passed my inquiry to Tom Freston, who in turn passed my letter to a Dwight Tierney, a VP of Marketing. His administrative assistant was a real piece of work, not the nicest person on the phone. But, in reflection, I suppose she was just protecting her boss. Or maybe she really was a real dragon. After several months of back-and-forth phone calls (I don’t think there was email back then), as well as a video audition tape, and many clever in-the-mail gifts, I decided it was better if I flew to New York to try and score an interview with Mr. Tierney. Of course, I didn’t have one when I flew to New York with my friend Suzanne, but ingenuity sometimes leads to great results.

While Suzanne was at the Metropolitan Museum of Art one afternoon, I went to Dean and Deluca, dressed in a suit, borrowed one of their aprons, bought a large glass of iced tea and a brownie, which I put into a box with my resume, cover letter, and hotel information and the bottom, and proceeded to take them to the delivery entrance of the Viacom building.

This was before September 11, so security proceeded to assume I was a delivery man and took me to Dwight Tierney’s office, where I presented my box of goodies to his very surprised secretary. Unfortunately, he was out of the office, but a week after I returned home to Texas, I was invited to return to New York to meet with Mr. Tierney, which I did, as he was impressed by my efforts. Unfortunately, he didn’t have a job for me, despite all of my suggestions of what I could do for the company and his department, but in the end, I felt the satisfaction of knowing I tried my best, pursued every avenue, made all the necessary calls, and never gave up. You might not always get the job, but you will definitely have expanded your career network!

VH-1

A few years later, and having built up my career network, I decided to see if I could get an informational interview with the Director of Marketing for VH-1. As it turned out, my wonderful friend Kimberly, who was working as a corporate concierge in Manhattan, kindly sent me his contact information, along with the contact information for many other people she had met while at various cocktail parties and work functions. Cold calling is never easy, but I did manage get him on the phone (and not hang up). It’s always a good idea to have some sort of reason to be calling a person, and luckily he remembered Kimberly and was happy to set up a time for us to meet for half an hour to discuss his career and VH-1.

I flew to New York, with my updated resume (just in case he wanted to see it). Our conversation was informative and professional, but despite his high position, he did take the time to discuss what it took to get a job at VH-1, and other interesting facets of his career. Remember, an informational interview is always about the person you are speaking to, unless at some point they do ask to see your resume.

After our chat, he told me to please keep in touch (there wasn’t an opening in his department), which I did for several years, until we eventually we lost touch. Did I regret going to New York twice in search of a job with Viacom? Absolutely not! Was I a bit disappointed that I didn’t get a job? Certainly, but because I did what I wanted to do, and TRIED, it gave me the courage to ask for other informational interviews, be bolder on the phone, learn better interview techniques, and allowed me to have more confidence than I’d ever had before.

Remember, keep on keeping on!

Thought of the Day

2008-10-27T23:07:00.001-07:00

Why is it not acceptable to laugh at a funeral, but it's ok to cry at a wedding?

Quote of the Day...

2008-09-28T19:06:00.000-07:00

"I asked for ice, but this is ridiculous!" ...John Jacob Astor IV a passenger on the Titanic after it struck an iceberg

Laundry Baskets

2008-09-27T23:56:00.000-07:00

Just a thought, but why is it I refuse to use my laundry basket when my clothes are done in the dryer? Instead, I prefer to try to carry the entire load, usually dropping several items on the way back to my apartment. Just noticed that I've been doing that a lot lately. Perhaps I'm being a rebel with my laundry. Go figure.

Salaries, Salaries, Salaries!

2008-09-25T06:50:00.000-07:00

My grandmother once told me if you had enough money to pay your rent/mortgage, all of your bills, and still have money left to put into savings, you were doing just fine. Simplistic, perhaps, but very true. One of the most difficult aspects of saying “yes” to a new job is negotiating your salary, benefits, and other possible perks.

Let’s say you’ve sent a potential employer your perfect resume and cover letter, aced the phone and/or in-person interview(s), and it’s been determined you’re the best candidate for the job. Before you say yes, take the time to do your homework before accepting a first offer. This is the BEST time for you to negotiate before you begin your new job.

Typically, perhaps in your first phone call from a potential employer, they might bring up the topic of how much money you’d like to make. Let them rather than you! If you’re asked this question, defer the question as long as possible, but do have a salary range in mind:

Employer: “What sort of salary were you thinking of?

You: “After researching the current market, and with my experience, I was thinking $85,000 to $100,000 sounds about right. Does the position’s salary fall within this range?”

When you quote a range, be certain the lowest figure you mention, in this example $85,000, is the lowest figure you’re willing to accept. You’ll be able to figure this out from doing research online (www.salary.com and www.salaryexpert.com are good websites) as well as speaking with people from your job network and from informational interviews.

If your interviewer mentions the salary you want is too high for the position, consider how much lower the actual salary might be than what you want and what perks you might be able to negotiate instead. For example, I was offered a job for a prestigious company in the Bay Area. Unfortunately, the salary was $3000 less than what I was making. The hiring manager was very nice, and mentioned that while she couldn’t match my current salary, she would be able to give me a $3000 hiring bonus to make up the difference. Other things you might try and negotiate are extra paid vacation days/weeks, medical/dental insurance starting immediately instead of after several months, paid transportation costs, stock options, etc.

Remember, if you are offered a salary which you are unhappy about, won’t meet your budget, and the employer won’t budge during negotiations, your power lies in your ability to simply walk away and politely say no to the job offer. Or, if you really want to work for the company, ask the hiring manager if you could negotiate a six-month job review, at which time you could possibly discuss a bump in your salary. Remember, it never hurts to ask for what you want!

That Rental Guy: February 21, 2003

2008-08-21T20:52:00.000-07:00

Hey, Rental Guy: I recently moved into a new apartment. The couple next to me were great neighbors until his girlfriend moved out. Since then, he has been partying with his friends all weekend until 6 am Sundays. I complained to the manager, but the parties kept happening every weekend. Each time, I lodged a complaint with the manager, but because nothing happened, I eventually stopped complaining. There was one month when things were quiet, but then one of his party buddies moved in and it has been a nightmare every since. They don't go to bed until past midnight every night. Until then, I can hear their music, their loud talking over the music, and slamming every door in the bathroom every single time they use it. I got so frustrated one night that I started pounding on the wall. The new guy came over and threatened me, saying that if I make life miserable for him, he'll make it so miserable for me that I'll have to move. But I can't afford to leave so soon after having moved in. The whole situation is very upsetting and I'm afraid. Should I tell the manager about the threat? Is there anything else I can do? …Scared Silly, Los Angeles

Hey, Scared Silly: Your neighbor is obviously pleased to be single again and is expressing his repressed social life through wild and crazy parties. The next time the party is under way until 6 a.m., call the police. You’ve made an effort to express your displeasure with your landlord and your neighbors, and they aren’t taking you seriously. It’s also a good idea to keep a thorough record of each noise complaint you filed with your landlord. Additionally, if the noise is bothering you, it’s probably annoying your other neighbors. Speak with them to see if they’re having the same problem and have been threatened by the same neighbor. The more people that complain to your landlord, the better your case will be against your partying neighbors.

Hey, Rental Guy: I live in a house with five other people. I'm renting the main floor, there are two people in the basement and the other couple is upstairs in the attic. There aren't any separate units and we all share the same address. We also do not have a separate meter for our utilities so there is no way to tell who uses what. When the landlord gets the bill in his name, he just divides it equally among us. But, since I often not at home, I wind up paying for my neighbors' utilities. Is this legal? Shouldn't we all have our own meters? The landlord also divides up the water and sewage bill for the house, something I thought that he had to pay. Finally, I am suspicious that the other quarters are illegal units. Where can I find out and what could I do about it without jeopardizing my own tenancy? Thank you for your help. It is hard to get information about tenancy laws without asking a lawyer. …More Than My Share, The City

Hey, More Than My Share: The answer of whether you paying the utilities is legal depends on the agreement you made with your landlord when you moved into the apartment. According to the California Department of Consumer Affairs, “Some buildings have a single gas or electric meter that serves more than one rental unit. In other buildings, a tenant’s gas or electric meter may also measure gas or electricity used in a common area, such as the laundry room or the lobby. In situations like these, the landlord must disclose to you that the utility meters are shared before you sign the rental agreement or lease. If you become a tenant, the landlord must reach an agreement with you about who will pay for the shared utilities. The agreement must be in writing and can consist of one of the following options: The landlord can pay for the utilities provided through the meter for your rental unit by placing the utilities in the landlord’s name; the landlord can have the utilities in the area outside your rental unit put on a separate meter in the landlord’s name; or you can agree to pay for the utilities provided through the meter for your rental unit to areas outside your rental unit.” Review your lease or rental agreement to see who is responsible for paying the water and sewage. Finally, if you wish to find out if some of the other units are illegal, call the San Francisco Department of Building Inspection at 415-558-6088 for further details.

That Rental Guy: June 28, 2002

2008-08-20T18:59:00.000-07:00

Hey, Rental Guy: I enjoy reading your weekly column! I am president of our neighborhood watch and have been trying to help older landlords in my area with various tenant problems. One of the landlords I work with has a long-term tenant who is a heavy smoker. The smell when you walk past the smoker’s door is nauseating. Even after professional insulation work, the smell permeates the walls into other tenant’s apartments. I’ve been inside the apartment, and everything is covered in smoke. It looks as if it has never been cleaned and the smoke damage could run into thousands of dollars. What can the landlord do? Thanks for your help and keep writing…Ron in The City

Hey, Ron: Landlords have the option of not renting to smokers if they apply a no-smoker policy to all of their tenants. According to the Federal Fair Housing Act, “A landlord is not required to rent to anyone whose tenancy would constitute a direct threat to the health and safety of others or pose a risk of damage to property.” In your case, the landlord allows smokers in their building, and must deal with the consequences. Landlord attorney David Wasserman mentions that landlords who permit smoking in their buildings run the risk that smoke will cause normal wear and tear to the unit. “The smell and film may be the financial responsibility of the landlord. I recently heard about a case where the tenant's smoke infiltrated the unit of another tenant. This conduct amounted to actionable nuisance and resulted in the smoker's eviction. So it seems that tenant who smokes must keep the smoke in the unit.”

Hey, Rental Guy: I'm a fun single woman with a great standard poodle and I just landed a wonderful job in San Francisco. Should I find out where the homeless pitch their tents immediately or is there hope? I'll pay up to $2,000 a month for the right place. What are some good sources for apartment hunting? I'm moving from Denver and I don't know anyone in the Bay Area. Help! …Peg with Poodle; Denver, Colorado

Hey, Peg: Congratulation on your new job and welcome to the Bay Area! I wouldn’t run out and buy a tent just yet. Instead, begin your rental housing search at least a month before you arrive in the Bay Area. Browse the Internet to help find your next apartment. Most rental housing websites will list contact information for free, although there are rental-housing finders that charge a fee for their services. Considering your budget is $2000 per month, you should be able to find a spacious flat or apartment for both you and your precious pooch. With such a large dog, you should also consider finding an apartment or flat with a backyard. Some helpful websites listing available rental properties include (and in no particular order): Craig’s List (www.craigslist.com), AMSI (www.amsires.com), Saxe Real Estate (www.saxerealty.com), the SF Weekly (www.sfweekly.com), the San Francisco Bay Guardian (www.sfbg.com), www.sf4rent.com, and the San Francisco SPCA (http://www.sfspca.org/opendoor/index.shtml#housing). Let me know how your housing search turns out.

Hey, Rental Guy: My wife and I were looking for an apartment in the East Bay and found a charming two-bedroom apartment in Berkeley. Before we completed a rental application, our potential landlord mentioned that he would not rent to us if we had small children. Isn’t this sort of statement illegal? …Family Man in Oakland

Hey, Family Man: This sort of statement is illegal. According to the Berkeley Rent Board, “It is against federal, state and local law to discriminate on the basis of “familial status” in the leasing and renting of housing accommodations. This prohibition means a landlord cannot discriminate against families with minor children, pregnant women or persons in the process of securing legal custody of a minor child. Therefore, it is unlawful to refuse to rent to families with children under the age of 18.” You should take your business elsewhere and look for another apartment.