leenawords

2007-01-11T13:03:00.000-08:00

India was lots of fun, full of lots of family, food, shopping, arts, a surprise wedding of my cousin, heat, and dust. The latter two really got to me in the last three weeks, with many distasteful manifestations in my nose, throat, and skin. Luckily, my uncle hooked up an appointment with a really swell skin specialist who prescribed this miracle cream to cure the latter ill. I think my nose and throat will mend themselves over time, since I'm now away from the outsourced pollution.

Random observations, speculations, and recommendations (which might eventually be culled into a more coherent article...) --

-You can find pretty much anything within a few feet of wherever you are in Mumbai, Delhi, or the big cities of Kerala. While sitting in traffic, I've been approached at the window with offers for novels, memory sticks, garlands, toys, nuts, and more. There are dozens of tiny shops lining every street, and dozens of informal stands set up with the most random merchandise. Services are ample from tailors to mechanics to doctors (allopathic and ayurvedic) and ridiculously affordable for anyone traveling from the west.

- Since the last time I was in Mumbai in 1997, I noticed a remarkable increase in women walking on the street -- and the average age is younger, and mode of dress far less conservative than it was then, though still utterly prude by American standards. Still, I didn't really feel unsafe in Mumbai at all; the male gaze was no worse than San Francisco. Delhi is notorious for being leering, but I only found it a little worse than Mumbai. Maybe I wasn't there long enough, or I was in the touristy areas at night.

- I thought our War on Terror was extreme, but Mumbai takes it to new levels. There are metal detectors placed ahead of every shopping mall, movie theater, and temple, and billboards and public service announcements to make "Mumbai Unbreakable." One temple in Kerala which has always required men to wear dhotis but used to allow them to wear them over pants and/or with shirts now only lets them wear a dhoti. (Uh, so much for "modesty" being a gender-neutral cultural concept.)

- People do not believe in leaving space in line!! You have to be all up in the booty of the person in front of you, or someone will surely cut, possibly from a sincere mistake about whether you meant to be in line, given your curiously considerate behavior.

- Probably the most useful Hindi phrase during travel to Hindi-speaking regions: "Nahi chahiye." (= "I don't want [it/them/these/those, etc.]") The street hawkers in all big cities I've been to, and the tour guides, particularly in Delhi, will be all over you trying to persuade you to buy their good or service. Just say this phrase loudly and clearly a few times and your work should be done (assuming you don't want their shit).

- Big temples leave you with a very poor taste in your mouth, incredibly dirty feet, and maybe a few bruises. Seriously, I fucking hate over-zealous temple-going motherfuckers who push, shove, and bribe to get in their worship. Temples are veritable marketplaces, with dozens of people swarming you to buy puja thalis, murtis, mithai, and random crap, or saying you can pay them 300 rupees to get to the front of the line. WTF? I mean, I can't blame the people offering up these goods and services because they're poor and they need money, and when have I ever otherwise been offended by blasphemy -- this would be a good place for it, on the contrary -- but I just can't stand being surrounded by earnestly pious twits.

- Arranged marriage is so weird to me. Maybe it shouldn't be, because my parents have had a successful one, and it has been quite common among the rest of my relatives and in my culture generally -- but the fact that I could never see myself emotionally and physically committing myself to someone just because he meets a certain community-authored checklist makes me further adamant in questioning any dominant paradigm of sexuality and relationships in any cultural context. I find the same problem of self-denial in arranged marriage that I find in heteronormativity or puritanism, and these are so inextricably linked. We need a personal as well as societal sexual revolution in order to acknowledge and affirm any desires or unions that fall outside the purview of heterosexual marriage.

- Somehow, the Punjabi food in India didn't seem that different to me than the Indian food that's available here. Of course, here (East Bay/SF at least) you don't really get Gomantak cuisine and Gujarati thalis and all that, and here the selection of the Punjabi fare is pretty limited and predictable, but the quality and taste is pretty comparable.

- Good places to eat in Mumbai include some really bomb hole-in-the-walls that actually didn't give any of us any stomach problems: Gypsy Corner (Maharashtrian snacks and pizza) in Dadar, Highway Gomantak (Goan cuisine) in Mahim, Gujarati Thali in Worli; and also some trendy, more upscale-ish spots like Olive (Mediterranean) in Bandra, Karma (Italian, Chinese, Indian) at Opera House, Bombay Blue (Chinese, Indian, Italian, Mexican) in Bandra, and Oven Fresh (Chinese, Indian, Italian, Mexican) in Dadar. My mom is the only one who got an upset stomach, and after which restaurant, but the five-star Taj Mahal Intercontinental. Oof!

The Many "Cinematic Adjustments" of Umrao Jaan

2006-11-06T13:04:00.000-08:00

If the earlier cinematic adaptation of Umrao Jan Ada compromised the actual depth of the novel according to this review, the new one obliterates it altogether.

The director really seems to have a flair for fucking up a poignant, feminist (yes, it is feminist, and a 19th-century Urdu male novelist wrote it) message and turning it on its head to fixate obsessively on redeeming the whore by making her have no desire for emotional or financial independence, crave for her emotions and sexuality to be caged and confined by one man, forgive her unremorseful rapist, and at the end of the movie give a present to dude that sold her into a brothel at the beginning of the movie. The latter gesture might make you think she has reconciled something in her perspective to break free of shackles once and for all -- of society, of the brothel, of her unsupportive family, of the mental agony from the many men who have screwed her over -- but think again; it's Ash. She is a complete victim to the end, never finding any place in the narrative for growth or empowerment. To top that, they kept playing a song with the refrain "Agle janam mohe bitiya na dije" = "In my next life don't give me a daughter."

Congratulations, J.P. Dutta, for taking a brilliantly rich commentary on the contrived and inherently oppressive dichotomy between a "respectable woman" and a "whore," and turning it into a four-hour public service announcement for sex selection.

A terrible movie. Two middle fingers up.

Domestic Violence Awareness Month - Let's Start Droppin' Some Knowledge

2006-10-06T13:30:00.000-07:00

You know, I hate doing South Asian domestic violence trainings for a crowd of people from non-immigrant backgrounds, because no matter how many disclaimers you put up saying, "Family violence is not the norm in the culture, but we are explaining some dynamics that can help inform the situation when it does occur," most of them come out saying, "Yeah, that culture's pretty fucked up." And then they describe functional, non-violent South Asian families, and strong South Asian women, as "westernized."

I suppose that's better than those who say, in the name of "liberalism," "That culture imposes such-and-such restrictions on women and punishes those who don't conform, but we should leave them alone because otherwise we'd be imposing our western values on them." (Big ups to S.P. for her paper on this issue.)

Here is the correct way to think about it. Within every culture and religious tradition, there are patriarchal turds who try to control the discourse and dictate what comprises the "culture." They try to freeze and essentialize gender roles -- in the most extreme instances, declaring that certain portions of whatever text justify domestic violence -- and declare homosexuality and divorce as alien to the culture. They try to say some people should have more rights than others, and then try to play it off like it's "different but equal." Find me any culture or major religion where there are not people who do this. And also find me any culture or religion where there are not people -- scholars, "backward caste" farmers, you name it -- who resist the patriarchal interpretation and recognize that culture is continuously evolving, and should evolve to allow dissenting voices.

It does get complicated in immigrant communities because you have the fact of a discrete and insular ethnic community thrown into the mix. A community that does face racism and tries to present itself well and save face by not addressing certain issues. A community that is trying to retain a sense of culture and is wary of intrusion on its practices. Those concerns, coupled with the eagerness of people outside the community to associate the culture itself with its most unhealthy manifestations, illuminates the need for a major wake-up call to all parties -- if the cultural leaders really do want what's best for all their constituents, and mainstream feminists really do want what's best for all women, without patronizing or insulting their cultures.

Patriarchy is fucked up. Racism is fucked up. Cultural or anti-racist justifications for misogyny or homophobia are fucked up. People who use culture or religion as a cloak to oppress other people are fucked up. And that is the end of the fucking story. Don't go around calling me "westernized" (comically, a compliment coming from many white feminists, and an insult coming from South Asian patriarchal traditionalists) just because I reject ass-backward red state, Hindutva, and other fundamentalist values.

dear snidely remarking aunty,

2006-09-22T13:32:00.000-07:00

Just because I've been going to the gym, don't start recommending low-fat and non-fat garbage for me to eat, especially when I'm happily and guiltlessly scarfing down shitloads of barfi and fried food right in front of you as you pretentiously deprive yourself of the same. Do not ASSume that I am a corporate-globalization-brainwashed dipshit vying to be the next size-negative-four, bleached-faced Miss India. I am just trying to be reasonably healthy and have an average body fat percentage. To that effect, I believe in adding healthy and productive items to my behavioral itinerary (more water, more fruit/vegetables, more exercise), but not eliminating any pleasurable ones; if, as a consequence of adding some of the healthy, I have less time/room for the unhealthy and a redistribution naturally occurs, then so be it, but I COME DANGEROUSLY CLOSE TO GETTING VIOLENT UPON THE SUGGESTION OF CURTAILING MY GLUTTONY IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM.

2006-09-08T13:33:00.000-07:00

There should be a rag retreat, where you just hulk with a bunch of sweets, get a massage, and ovulate. If this society is going to define us by our reproductive capabilities, we should get at least that much for them.

2006-08-03T13:36:00.000-07:00

Tonight I attempted rollerskating with Don, Hrrang, and Chickon, after about fifteen years. What a workout! Mostly for my right arm, having clutched the railing for the first half hour. I never was able to glide properly. Goddamn, I'm bloody almost 26 years old and all these little rascals are so much better than me. Next time, Hrrang, Chickon, and I plan to film a documentary where we show ourselves skating and then highlight various babies' thoughts and reactions to our ineptitude.

All moved back!

2006-07-31T13:37:00.000-07:00

I'm officially back in the East Bay, with stacks of garbage bags in my bedroom and the garage to prove it (that's how I pack). I didn't do a very good job of cleaning, but hopefully I'll get some of my deposit back. I had meant to clean and even started to -- really! -- but then I accidentally vacuumed a penny and all hell broke loose. Since the vacuum started roaring furiously and emitting foul smells, I resolved to abandon that task, and then thought there was no point in doing anything else either. I'm very logical that way.

Before the Bar, I was weirdly sad to be leaving Davis, but now I am SO over it. I'm fucking done with law school, with an 11 x 17 inch diploma to prove it. Now it's on to bigger and better things, like lazing around in front of the TV for three and a half months, at which time I will head off to India!

No, I do need to find some sort of temp work though. That private loan I rather unnecessarily took out is really going to screw me up the ass, come December.

THE FIRST DAY OF THE MOTHAFUCKIN BAR EXAM IS FINISHED!

2006-07-25T13:39:00.000-07:00

And it wasn't even that bad!

But I'm anticipating tomorrow to be the worse...

--

Oh, before I forget, some tips for the future Bar takers:

1. Screw essay predictions. The predictions were off. People were so sure there would be no Contracts at all, and probably no Torts, and if Torts, then defamation. There was indeed Torts, AND there was a Contracts question for the fifth exam in a row. Just be prepared for anything and everything.

2. Stay in a hotel. I thought it was a little overboard, especially since my apartment is just twenty minutes away, but it does put your mind at ease a little bit to be right around the block. If you take it in Sac, the Vagabond Inn is a good place. It's cheap, has free breakfast, had vacancies even two weeks before surprisingly (that's when I booked), and is literally a block away. I think I'll just walk there tomorrow instead of pay the 7 damn bucks for parking. I could use that for lunch instead. Speaking of which...

3. There isn't a whole lot of time for lunch. By the time the fuckers get done with the announcements, you don't start until almost 9:15, and by the time all the exams get picked up, you don't break for lunch until like 12:40, and then you're supposed to be back in your seat by 1:45. At least tomorrow isn't laptoppage, so there should be more time to go out and grab something... but the parking lot gets crazy with all those peeps.

4. Be prepared for the worst with respect to ExamSoft, if you plan to type. I know a couple of people whose software failed them. I haven't practiced hand-writing the exams at all, but I guess it's a good idea. :X

Pre-Bar Body Check

2006-07-24T13:41:00.000-07:00

Hair - extremely dry, but quantitatively replenishing! May be due to the combination of chlorophyll, the psychosomatic/placebo effects of chlorophyll, and having calm and unstressful study buddies.

Eyes - I haven't worn contacts in about two months. The glasses are getting a little jacked, but I need to stick with them because I can't risk the consequences of adjusting to something new at this point. New eyeliner has been purchased to appease my arbitrary vanity. Eyebrows are a mess.

Nose - I have been wanting to switch my nosering, but can't risk any swelling until after the Bar. Sneezed a little bit last week, but in good shape at present.

Lips - No cold sores, blisters, or other crap, and not too chapped, surprisingly.

Skin - Dry, but surprisingly not as dry and cracked and overall decrepit as it could have been, given the weather. New lotion has been purchased.

Shoulders/Back - Tense. Need to sleep well and avoid excessive hunching over.

Hands - Not too sore; fingers are quite nimble but tend to quiver when anxious. Just cut fingernails.

Tits - Doing just fine. Comfortable bras have been procured.

Belly - Larger than life. Gave me mild problems a couple of days back, but feeling OK now. Need to feed it more vegetables and maybe some salmon.

Pelvic region - At ease. Not due for menses until the beginning of August, and really really hoping the subliminal stress won't induce them earlier.

Legs - Nothing noteworthy.

Feet - Terrible flip fop tan, and very dry. Will lotion them up right now.

---

I really need to stop listening to "Where's the Party Tonight." I have it stuck in my head all the time. There is never a moment when I don't have a song stuck in my head, and I guess this is unusual. I need to listen to something slow and boring so as to keep it in my head during the exam.

2006-07-23T13:42:00.000-07:00

~~Tonight will be my last night in Davis and in my apartment.~~

I'm checking into the hotel early 'cause it's just too fucking hot here. The first thing I packed was my vibrator. I am now packing my leftover alcohol and chasers, having confirmed that there is a refrigerator in the room. I was about to throw in some condoms, but I thought that might be overdoing it.

Yeah, this is for the California Bar Exam.

2006-07-22T13:43:00.000-07:00

I don't think anybody on the face of this planet could ever comprehend how much I hate spiders, except maybe Cyn. But even she cannot empathize with how much I fear and abhor even the tiniest of them.

Do you know how many times I have fled the shower in the past week, arms flailing in the air? It is truly a matter of terror, being half blind in the shower and seeing a faint impression of a spider gliding down from the wall and dangling right above your head. Today took the cake, as it was TWO mini-spiders dangling together from a single thread, and I think one of them was dead. EWWWWW. WHY would they choose to venture on a hang-gliding adventure when water is spraying so close to them? I guess it truly is their version of an extreme sport. Fucking assholes.

And now I keep getting paranoid and thinking my HAIR is a spider!

Craigslist Characters

2006-07-20T13:45:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to sell off all my furniture (if you are reading this, I hereby offer to give you my couch, futon, TV stand, and/or bed for FREE if it has not already been sold as of the time you accept the offer and you haul it out at a mutually agreed upon time prior to July 31), and I put ads on Craigslist indicating as such. A woman named Sherry emailed inquiring after the TV, so I gave her directions and we set a time for her to come by. She called a little while after she was due and said that she was having trouble finding the place, and was facing a Macy's. I asked whether she was in Davis. She was not. I then got to listen to her conversation with her man.

Sherry: She's in Davis!
Man: What? Well you're the one that called and got the directions.
Sherry: You're the one that looked it up on Craigslist and said it was in Sacramento!
Man: Well there's just one for the whole area so I didn't see the city.
Me: Um, would you still like to come by tonight, or do you want to reschedule?
Sherry: Should we still go? You'll be late to work.
Man: Yeah let's go.
Sherry: But there's a lot of traffic now, your work might fire you.
Man: No it shouldn't be too long, we're not far from there.
Sherry: OK, but if you get fired, I'm dumping you!

They came by with their two kids and got the TV. The man was stoked at the good deal he got, and told the woman her mom would have to find another one because he wanted to keep it.

2006-07-12T13:47:00.000-07:00

I have never been a particularly eloquent speaker, but there was a time when I was somewhat skilled at distilling a few sensible thoughts into keystrokes. The only typing I now do involves uncritical, unembellished recitations of the law. My sense of humor, if it ever existed, has now wilted to the point where I delight in any use of the term "substantial" or "compelling" that is outside the context of legal discourse, should I ever find myself in the proximity of such a usage. My social destitution compounds each day.

After taking the Bar, I will promply enroll in a course that teaches me how to interact with other human beings; preferably, it will be online.

a really bad property pick-up poem

2006-06-16T19:14:00.000-07:00

I never gave you permission
To enter my heart
But now you've acquired
A prescriptive easement

You entered actually
Your presence was continuous
The whole world knew
It was open and notorious

Now the statute has run
And I can stop you no longer
'Til you give a clear sign
That you don't belong hurr

I never gave you permission
To enter my heart
But now you've acquired
A prescriptive easement

2006-05-26T23:32:00.000-07:00

It looks like the film "Provoked" starring Ash and based on the real-life story of Kiranjit Ahluwahlia is already finished and was premiered at Cannes. I don't think Ash is the greatest actor, but I'm glad she's using her power to bring light to the issue of domestic violence, and willing to relay her own experience of abuse.

Although, I'm not sure how much power she has anymore, since people are always ready to bring a woman down. People have been less enthusiastic about her since she broke up with Vivek, and making her out to be some sort of cold-hearted breaker of man-hearts. Gimme a break.

Lakireddy v. Kaavya -- Who's the Veritable Brown Villain?

2006-05-23T10:55:00.000-07:00

(This has been cross-posted to Pass the Roti.)

I just typed “Lakireddy Bali Reddy” into Technorati, and it returned a scant twelve posts, several of which are completely unrelated to the case I will discuss shortly.

Then just for the hell of it, I typed in “Kaavya Viswanathan,” and got back three thousand, two hundred and twenty-three posts. And keep in mind many people wouldn’t have spelled her name correctly.

I know it can be fun to trash a young brown sister who almost became a remarkable overnight success, but are we really that much more schadenfreude than we are sincere? Because if our motivation in obsessing over “Kaavyagate” was really to put down the collective axe on bad brown behavior, I think the tale of Reddy and his heinous crimes of power and exploitation — along the lines of gender, age, class, caste, and immigration status — would have made the rounds in a big way starting about six years ago, such that his Defense would have absolutely no case in the hearing that occurred on Monday.

So who is this abominable creep of whom I speak? There is a pretty good factual background on Diana Russell’s web site (note: some of the racial/cultural references on the site may be problematic; feel free to comment on that). Basically, he is an incredibly wealthy landlord based in Berkeley, California (owns several restaurants and other business and residential property), who trafficked in several girls from his village in India over a thirteen-year period to extract cheap labor and sexually abuse them. Although the exact extent of emotional distress caused to some of the victims is unknown and was indeed the matter in dispute today, it is undisputed that one of the victims was pregnant with his child — at age 17 — when she died from carbon monoxide poisoning in the housing he provided for her. Yet, from Russell’s site:

On March 7, 2001, Reddy pleaded guilty to smuggling teenage girls from India for sex (sic) — including one as young as 13 — in a plea deal. In return for this admission, John Kennedy, the Assistant U.S. Prosecuting Attorney, whose job it was to represent Reddy’s victims, recommended that he spend only between 5 and 6 1/2 years in federal prison and pay only two million dollars in restitution (his Berkeley properties alone are worth more than $80 million) to three surviving victims and the parents of the Prattipati sisters. Shockingly, in return for Reddy’s limited admission of guilt, the Alameda District Attorney agreed not to charge Reddy for statutory rape of the girls despite the fact that he had forced sex on them for many years. Kennedy was clearly derelict in his duty to Reddy’s victims when he accepted Reddy’s outrageously minimal admissions of guilt as well as for proposing an equally outrageously minimal sentence for these extremely serious crime.

In the end, all he got was eight years prison time, which started in 2001. And the hearing held on May 22, 2006 was to cut down even that, because of alleged “obstruction of justice” coming from an interpreter involved in the case, who apparently encouraged some of the victims to exaggerate their emotional distress. Luckily, the judge didn’t buy that this “obstruction of justice” exceeded the kind caused by Reddy himself, and retained Reddy’s 97-month sentence. However, what scared me was that the courtroom was packed with supporters of Reddy — at least sixty of them. There were but a handful of people present to stand up for the victims and against the exploitation that this man committed. The press release from ASATA, Maitri, and South Asian Sisters can be found here. These three groups in addition to Berkeley-based Narika have been tracking the case for several years, with ASATA having been formed in 2000 in direct response to the case.

Would the response from the community have been different if the perpetrator were not South Asian? Would it then have been more widely discussed and bemoaned how young South Asian women were victims of this awful exploitation, because it also had a racial element? Is this another case of not wanting to air out our dirty laundry? Do some of us think it is less bad that it was (sort of) intra-community than it would be if the abuse came from someone of a different race, suggesting that there is some sort of entitlement or at least tacit acceptance for gender-based oppression within our community?

Or perhaps some of the reservations on the part of “progressive” brown folks come from the fact that we are against the prison-industrial complex, and the “lock them up and throw away the key” mentality? While I would agree that our criminal justice system has gotten way out of hand, we lock up too many people, we have backward priorities, we should prioritize rehabilitation over retribution, and all that jazz… I just can’t apply that theory to this case, where it is a clear crime of power. I just don’t see progressives running around trying to free skinheads who committed hate crimes from the PIC — nor should we have any sympathy for people who commit gender-based crimes of power, whether inside or outside the community.

In any case, it makes me highly uncomfortable as a brown women to think that if I got caught up some nerdy academic scandal, my brown brethren would be the first to trash me in their sadistic little grapevines, and my name would be blown off the charts in Technorati; but were I to be completely and utterly exploited and violated by a Desi man, his name and good reputation might be left virtually untouched.

John Gibson to White Women: "Breed!"

2006-05-18T10:51:00.000-07:00

Reason #1: the "Hispanics" in the US.

Reason #2: the Muslims in Europe. Oh but he does clarify there that it's not just white women:

I said, fine, but it was also a good idea if people other than Hispanics also got busy and had more babies. Those people would include both blacks and whites. I suppose Asians, too. I said you can't expect Hispanics to do all the work when it comes to supplying our country with babies.

I suppose that would include me! Let's get on with it, then: procreation, not recreation!

2006-05-14T10:53:00.000-07:00

Here's a really good article on Darfur and the way it has been shrugged off as a Zionist-coopted movement. Although the issue of backlash is understandable, I'm always disappointed and outraged when the struggles of the marginalized within the marginalized are undermined to save face of the wider community. If that's a case of ethnic cleansing, we have gender cleansing in India and its US diaspora, and sexual orientation cleansing in Iran. Oh, and how can I forget the Brahmin Samaj of North America -- wtf?!

If people are so concerned that these issues are only brought up by racist people outside our cultures to justify war and imperialism, when will we address them as human rights issues on our own and show the world that our cultures and communities do stand up first and foremost for the rights of our marginalized? I certainly don't endorse misguided western intervention, but I am even more sick of our constant kowtowing to patriarchal brown elites. How many more non-straight-brown-men will we sacrifice while we wait for the backlash to pass? (Not that among women of color we have our shit together either; check out this interview re: the politics of respectability and the Duke rape case. Fucking shit.)

Related: Let's not forget the US mainstream liberal quest to ignore gender and sexual orientation and class AND race, and everybody who is left of Bush should just unite to get him out of office and quit it with the "balkanization." But as Ann Bartow brings up often, the language our liberal friends employ is very problematically gendered; whattup with the Heathers? (I had no idea that metaphor was used so much!)

Bollywood Music Fun Facts!

2006-05-11T10:54:00.000-07:00

I love the song "Kaho Na Kaho" from Murder, and knew off the bat it was ripping off some Middle Eastern song, since by keeping in Arabic lyrics, they haven't even tried to fake the funk. But there's indeed so many versions of this song! Check this out from this page:

Kaho Na Kaho (Amir Jamal)/ Tamally Ma'ak (Amr Diab) You must have seen the promos for a new movie titled 'Murder' ( a rip-off of the Diane Keaton - Richard Gere starrer 'Unfaithful' which came out in 2002 - well, what else do you expect when Mahesh Bhatt is at the helm of affairs!). There's an interesting song, 'Kaho na kaho' that is garnering all attention since it also has Arabic lyrics in between. As far as I understand, Anu Malik is credited with its music (at least in the promos!), but the origins of this song go a long way back!

'Kaho na kaho' is sung by Pakistani singer Amir Jamal and is his composition from his 2003 album by the same name. If you had heard the song, you'd have noticed Arabic lyrics that goes, '...tamally ma'ak'. And there lies the twist! This song was originally composed by Sherif Tag (lyrics by Ahmed Ali Mousa) and sung by Arabic singer Amr Diab under the name (what else?) 'Tamally Ma'ak' in the year 2000 (from the album of the same name). Amir Jamal simply lifted this song and added Hindi lyrics and used it in his album. This song has also found its way in to 'Murder', thanks to the Bhatts! Its one thing to copy a song with no credit whatsoever to its original composer and its completely another thing to use the same title/ lyrics in the copied version! And does 'Tamally Ma'ak' sound similar? It just might...'cos Sanjeev Darshan have already lifted 2 songs from this album for the Anil Kapoor starrer 'Rishthey'! Check out the page on Sanjeev Darshan for details!

Listen to Kaho na kaho [Amir Jamal] | Tamally Ma'ak [Amr Diab]

Another interesting aspect here is that Amir Jamal is not the only person to lift this song. There are, on last count, 6 other versions of this song, besides Amir Jamal's Hindi/ Arabic version! And not even one version is legal - not one was done with permission from Amr Diab or with a credit to him! But this sure shows how popular Amr Diab is across the globe! Here's a list of the other lifts of Tamally Ma'ak...Thanks to information from the website on Amr Diab.
Israel: Artist: Orna & Moshe Datz, Song: You're In My Heart, Year: 2001 [Listen to You're In My Heart]
Bulgaria: Artist: Ivana, Song: Skitam se az, Year: 2002 - [Listen to Skitam se az]
Argentina: Artist: Andrea Del Valle Bela, Song: Te voy a dejar, Year: 2004 - [Listen to Te voy a dejar]
Spain: Artist: Carmona, Song: Te Quiero Ti, Year: 2003 - [Listen to Te Quiero Ti]
Russia: Artist: Avraam Russo, Song: Daleko Daleko, Year: 2002 [Listen to Daleko Daleko]
Japan: Resung in Arabic by the Japanese band 'Warna' and released as a video. Watch the video at this Amr Diab site!

I just thought of something.

2006-05-08T07:48:00.000-07:00

Steve Martin = Vivek Oberoi in 30 years!

Open Letter From Dave Chappelle to White Fans

2006-04-17T17:14:00.000-07:00

UPDATE: I posted this on my MySpace bulletin, and got back a message that says this was not written by Dave himself, but by a fellow named Mark H. Harris (http://www.popmatters.com/columns/harris/060411.shtml). Nonetheless, it seems like Dave did have some sentiments similar to the ones expressed here (http://www.miami.com/mld/miamiherald/living/people/14339056.htm), and it raises some important issues about race and humor.

---

And these are assorted thoughts I have on this:

Humor is so totally political, so I'm glad this letter teases out some of the reasons of why that is, and why sometimes joking can be community-specific and it can be offensive for people who don't have to deal with certain things linked to their identity on a day-to-day basis to appropriate it just for kicks.
You can use humor in more subversive ways than Dave has been using it. I don't really see how playing a crackhead that shits in alleys is politically positive in any context, even if it's just among your community peeps, but that's just me. I'm not saying all humor HAS to be politically subversive -- I do enjoy pointless toilet humor or even Ali G -- but Dave is treating it as an either/or as far as having a white audience or being political. He is talented and funny enough to be conscious of the negative externalities of certain types of humor in some contexts, and still retain his marketability in a white audience. I know he says is not among his goals, but I think maybe it should be, and this wouldn't just be selling out. Which brings me to my next point:
Humor can unite people in unlikely ways, and is a powerful tool in changing people's thinking and broadening their perspectives -- and that's why I would really like to see more diverse faces represented in mainstream comedy. Margaret Cho has plenty of straight, white fans even though she is blatantly queer-positive and sticks it to white people. While I think it's good to have artists cater to their communities, I also think mainstream entertainment should encompass more variety.
Anyway, I do see how it can be annoying to see an epidemic of suburban white boys dressing like you and quoting you and not at all trying to look past the surface to consider your experience and the history behind it. So with that, here's the letter --

Dear White People:

How are you? I am fine. Long time no see! I ran into Gary the other day. Tell him not to worry about that rash; a little penicillin will clear it right up. LOL. Anyway, on to business.

First, I wanna say that I appreciate the support you've given me over the years -- not only during my show, but since Half Baked, too... Although, really, would it have killed you to shell out $8 to see Undercover Brother? Alright, alright, we won't get into that again. After all, I did make you rent Screwed. My bad on that one.

If I may be so bold as to quote the great Lionel Richie: thanks for the times that you've given me. The memories are all in my mind. And now that we've come to the end of our rainbow, there's something I must say out loud...

I think we should see other people.

There are lots of great comedians out there for you. Ant from Last Comic Standing, for instance. That gay bit never gets old! It's nothing against you personally; black people and I have just decided to give it one more shot. I think we can be happy together.

Really, it's not you; it's me.

OK, maybe it's you just a bit. I mean, I like you. I even love you. I just don't trust you. You're kind of like a creepy stepfather. You could be a great dad for years -- taking me to ballgames, playing catch and all -- but if I were to wake up one night to find your nut sack on my chin, I wouldn't be all that shocked.

You may have seen me on Oprah talking about the time I felt that a white guy on my staff was laughing at me rather than with me during a sketch I was doing in blackface. Or when I said that there's a group of people who are "just fans" along for a celebrity worship ride, the type who scream, "I'm Rick James, bitch!" at my concerts. And maybe you saw in Block Party where Questlove from The Roots was talking about how frustrated I was with the "demographic" I attracted after Half Baked. That demographic, white people, was you.

You've gotta admit that you haven't exactly filled me with confidence in your self-control. You've taken slang like "bling", "all good", and "ho cake" and squeezed all of the edge out of them. And when did backwards caps become the official uniform of drunken keg stands? You wanna know why I went to Africa? Because "I'm Rick James, bitch!" was becoming the new "Dy-no-mite!" You already ruined Lil' Jon's career; I don't wanna be next.

I've started to feel like those reggae cats who come to America on tour, spreading Afro-centric messages like "Back to Africa" and "Kill whitey", and the only people who show up to their concerts are 50-year-old hippies and latte-sipping WTO protestors who don't hear anything beyond "one love" and "legalize it".

Please, don't make this harder than it has to be.

It's just that this interracial stuff has me tripping. I can't take you anywhere without wondering what people think of me. I'm even hearing things now. Like, I was walking down the street the other day, and I swear somebody yelled out, "Gumbel!" I turned around, and no one was there. It was a sniper slur. That shit bugged me out!

And how am I supposed to know you're not gonna embarrass me by misinterpreting something I do in a skit? Like, when I play a homeless crackhead shitting in an alley, you might think that all black people do that! Sure, some black people shit in alleys, but some white people watch Laguna Beach. I won't judge y'all if you don't judge us.

It's best if we make a clean break.

Don't call, don't come by my crib, and for God's sake, no more email forwards about 10 ways to annoy people at the computer lab. We graduated, like, a decade ago! Let it go! I know that you like to feel like you have a black friend finally, but can't you get a butler or a lawn jockey or something?

I understand that, as a privileged race, it's hard for you to feel that something is off limits to you, but pencil me in as #2 behind the N-word.

Why must you love me so? I'm tired of being so damn likeable! Chris Rock doesn't have to deal with this clinginess. He's all sociopolitical and "ranty" enough in an angry black male sort of way that he keeps white people at arm's length. Me, I'm the happy-go-lucky drinking buddy. If I talk about anything serious, it's just "drunk talk". It's enough to drive a nigga CRAZY! Just kidding.

But really, do you know what it's like to be a comedian? I can't have a conversation without someone expecting me to come up with some brilliantly funny nugget off the top of my head. And "Get the fuck outta my face" usually doesn't cut it. It's even more complicated when you're a black comedian, and your primary audience is white. That's why I gotta quit you.

Am I paranoid? Maybe a bit, but can you blame me? As I said to Oprah, "Opes" -- I call her "Opes" -- "What is a black man without his paranoia intact?" A Republican, that's what! You might be my best friend for life, but that doesn't mean I might not find a Grand Dragon's robe hanging in your closet one day. I wouldn't even be pissed off about it. It was a calculated risk anyway, like hitting on 17 in blackjack: "Aw, damn... Oh well, it's been fun."

I can't stay in a relationship that's always challenging my dignity and integrity. That's Wayans Brothers territory. But I do realize that I'm partly to blame; skits about piss and venereal disease are just begging for a frat boy following. That's why I'm turning over a new, socially responsible leaf. Block Party was the first step. More conscious material and less fecal material; that's what Dave Chappelle has in store for 2006. (As you can see, I'm trying to hold back on my swearing and shit.)

I know you'll be disappointed in my new stuff; that's why I'm sending this letter to you now. You deserve someone who'll give you what you need.

After all, I just want you to be happy.

Your casual acquaintance,
Dave

PS -- If, in a year or two, it turns out that the only gig black folk have for me is hosting the BET Awards, remember that when I wrote this letter, I was taking Ambien and had a mild head cold.

Fear and Russell Peters

2006-04-16T17:15:00.000-07:00

So I had taken a three-minute-or-so video of Russell Peters from the very back row of the Warfield theater and uploaded it to YouTube a couple of months ago. A few days ago, I got an email from YouTube about a DMCA complaint for copyright infringement that resulted in the deletion of that video.

These are the fears Mr. Peters might have had and my rebuttals to them:

Fear: The clip would give people enough information so that people would no longer have an incentive to see him live or buy the full DVD.

If they like the clip, it will probably make them MORE motivated to check him out live or buy the DVD, seeing as how the clip is hella fuzzy and you can barely even see him.
If they dislike the clip, chances are they 1) didn't know much about him in the first place and would never even think about going to his show, this clip confirming their disinterest; or 2) have heard about him through a friend that said he was good, so they might still want to go, at least as a social activity. And plus, that was a very flattering excerpt of his show! It's not like I chose the crappiest or most out of context segment.

Fear: Now he won't be able to repeat the same jokes.

People love repetition. You know how commercials often show you the funniest parts of a comedy and you're still really excited and giggly when it comes in the actual movie? And have you noticed how Margaret Cho always repeats certain one-liners and has the same set of impersonations that have become her trademark? It's not a bad thing if people have seen some of it before!
If you were banking on repeating the exact same thing word for word in the same manner, that doesn't reflect the greatest imagination. Come on now!

What other fears might he have had?

In any case, I think the clip primarily served the role of free advertising. I had tags like "Indian," "desi," "comedy," "humor," "performance," and "Warfield" in addition to his name, and plus people interested in my other videos might have navigated to that one. I think the placing of his video was free advertising more than anything else and probably gave him exposure to a wider audience. Plus, it was shitty-ass quality! If I were a performer, it would be a dream come true for someone to put up a poor-quality sample of my high-quality work.

2006-04-15T17:15:00.000-07:00

Aamir Khan is one of the few socially conscious members of the Bollywood "film fraternity," as Karan Johar would put it. He has now become active with Bhopal recovery and the Narmada Bachao Andolan. I mean, if you have BJP members burning your effigy, you've gotta be headed on the right track. (I by no means think he's some noble superhuman for doing this; he's just acting like a responsible human being who has enough food on his table to look out for other people, while most other Bollywooders are not. I guess in some ways that makes him more admirable for doing all this despite being a wealthy public figure, although there are tons of broke-ass activists who get no personal recognition for the thankless pursuits they take up against all odds. Well, so it goes.)

But I'm glad people finally called him out about the whole Coke endorsement thang. He's trying to be all diplomatic about looking into the pollution issue, but come on now. You're Aamir Khan. You don't need to be selling out to some water-sucking, tooth-decaying, diabetes-churning multi-national corporation.

OMFG

2006-04-12T17:16:00.000-07:00

Si se puede

2006-04-10T17:17:00.000-07:00

The march this morning was off the hook. The stuff within Sacramento was huge -- like over 10,000 people I'm sure, though pride n' politics as usual rerouted the original plan (one group powerhulked the plan of another and decided to march through the whole city instead of holding the rally at the designated spot, bleh) -- but it was the march from Davis to Sacramento that was even more awesome. I thought maybe twenty people would actually wake up and be willing to trudge eleven miles across the causeway beginning at 7:30 since I had to think a minute before deciding I would do it myself, but there were actually at least 150 people who showed up for that. That only included about twelve law students, lots of undergrads, lots of high school students, and even some junior high students. They had so much energy the whole time and were the most well-behaved demonstrators I've ever seen, walking double-file and staying within the left lane of the causeway, and observing all traffic rules and keeping gaps in driveways throughout the walk within East Sacramento.

The decision to do the causeway was so brilliant because it was perfectly legal (though some cops tried to give us trouble before we even set off but then backed off when Mercy said she was a law student and knew that we could walk without a permit as long as we kept one lane open -- brown people who know their rights; watch out ) and not literally interfering with traffic, but then it totally did interfere because all these rubberneckers were like "." A lot of people honked and gave thumbs up and other enthusiastic gestures, but of course we also had some thumbs down and "Get a Green Card" type comments. A couple of journalists walked or biked the whole causeway with us, mostly in support, I think. Some smirking dick journalists were at the scene before we departed, and one of them asked these two kids who were clearly on the younger end what they thought about people carrying Mexican flags -- and these kids didn't even have Mexican flags.

It will be interesting to see how the media covers the march, since I didn't see a single disorderly or illegal activity take place, and everyone seemed really mature and informed. There were lots of families, and I noticed this one cameraman spend like hell of minutes zooming in on these two young girls with stickers on their faces that were cheering and shit. I'm sure they'll try to make that out to be hell of representative of the march. Also, there were way more American flags than Mexican flags (not that it should fuckin' matter), but I could see them skewing that too.

The cops within Sacramento were actually really helpful and helped clear traffic for us.