tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11748116522821951352009-11-11T17:38:14.676-05:00Making friends and enemies, one post at a time.t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.comBlogger304125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-13178226055657032682009-11-02T22:08:00.003-05:002009-11-02T22:25:39.665-05:00

(While watching our Local on the 8s, we had this conversation regarding a married couple with whom we are friends.)Me: "They have a bet going. She thinks we're done with our sixty-degree days, and he thinks the temperature will reach sixty degrees at least one more day in November."Nate: "What did they wager?"Me: "If the temperature stays below sixty this month, he has to clean all the bathrooms

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-12373185406049054282009-11-01T23:36:00.001-05:002009-11-02T02:29:33.406-05:00

What the hell, it's NaBloPoMo! Here are some pics of my little ones from this weekend.Rhys The Magic DragonCharlotte, my little flower.Some people played CDs of scary Halloween sounds. I just removed Charlotte's pacifier for a few seconds to produce the same effect. Here's one without the mute button pacifier. (No, I'm not in costume here. I bet you thought I went as Lady Who Dresses Too Young

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-37408443644698120532009-07-20T12:36:00.000-04:002009-07-20T13:13:59.141-04:00

In no particular order...✽ I would crap my pants if I saw this in person:Explanation here.✽ At the risk of sounding lonely and desperate (I swear I'm not!): Have you ever seen a complete stranger and thought, "I totally want to be friends with that girl"? If I had to pinpoint what triggers this thought, I guess I'd say A) an infectious laugh or B) a cool outfit. I'm not sure what that says about

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-63628881478688169002009-06-12T12:39:00.003-04:002009-06-12T13:04:17.381-04:00

Both my kids were sleeping so, instead of pouncing on the opportunity to get some work done around the house, I checked in on a political blog. The blog post was completely relevant to a current event, yet the comment thread became about something entirely different. Somewhere along the way, a holy war erupted between atheists and evangelical Christians.Since everyone is entitled to my opinion, I

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-17983436400111527112009-06-11T23:15:00.008-04:002009-06-12T04:30:40.094-04:00

I thought about posting a video blog, wherein I would smear my eye makeup and cry in front of a bedsheet, screaming "LEAVE BRITNEY KIDS ALONE!" Unfortch, I didn't have time for that. Apparently, I also lack the time to type words in their entirety.Anyway, note to political pundits, deejays, and (late night) comedians: Leave kids alone. Kids can't choose their parents, and children of celebrities

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-26700574862100842072009-06-09T00:48:00.007-04:002009-06-09T05:12:33.080-04:00

(Paragraphs? You expect writing to have structure? You've come to the wrong place.)*I miss blogging. I have so much I want to talk about. Charlotte has reflux, so I have to hold her all the time. It's too difficult to type. Not to mention, my Reader has over 1,000 unread posts. This kid's crampin' my style.*I technically returned to work Memorial Day weekend. I am not working during the week (I

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-30813518511022770662009-06-03T11:17:00.004-04:002009-06-03T11:25:47.011-04:00

"Everybody wants it. It's work. I have very, very thick hair, so it's not going to work for everybody. I've seen people come through the book line with thin hair and it's just won't work. My hair stylist gets calls from all across the country."-The completely delusional Kate Gosselin, talking about her hedgehog hair.

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-11628351383420236832009-05-21T01:21:00.004-04:002009-05-21T01:33:38.831-04:00

I hope to post something substantial to my blog soon. In the meantime, I encourage you to view some awkward family photos. Make sure to read the captions.AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com(It's 1:30 AM. I am sleep-deprived and delirious. Maybe that's why I find this website EFFING HILARIOUS.)

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-12418218476820730932009-05-05T11:57:00.001-04:002009-05-05T15:47:13.615-04:00

Ah, life with two under two. (I pitched Two Under Two to TLC. They told me to have twenty-seven more children and get back to them. Anything less is a waste of their film.) But here are some photos to give you the general idea:The last six weeks have flown by, between nursing the baby when she demands to be fed every hour (no lie) and changing as many diapers as there are hours in the day. Things

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com21tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-21200066511413827062009-03-20T15:15:00.002-04:002009-03-20T15:40:40.313-04:00

Yesterday, I awoke at 5 a.m. to a fairly large contraction. It was stronger than the Braxton Hicks contractions that I've been having for the last month. I tried to fall back asleep, but these contractions kept coming every five minutes. Woo-hoo! Consistent, regular contractions. Time to go to the hospital.When we got to the hospital, they hooked me up to the monitor. Because my

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-2265782009340062192009-03-17T23:52:00.002-04:002009-03-18T04:02:19.308-04:00

Last summer, I hated our next-door neighbors. And I hadn't even met them.They were building their house on the lot right next to ours. The process took forever. It was very loud. The builders worked from sunrise to sunset, with peak activity seemingly occurring during what should've been Rhys' nap time. Grr.Of course, as the process came to an end, we started to get excited about who was going to

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-15591244131680882262009-03-17T23:20:00.002-04:002009-03-18T04:09:57.562-04:00

All the rotund belly you can handle at The Working Closet.

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-8512929303781557142009-03-09T00:52:00.000-04:002009-03-09T01:30:45.006-04:00

*Naming boys is a lot easier. You can go one of two ways: traditional or trendy. With girls, you have a variety of options, plus girl names come with connotations. Will people perceive her as a nerdy librarian? a stripper? a snob?*If you go with a very traditional name, people will ask if your child is being named after someone in your family. That’s their nice way of saying “that name is so

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-87490983800793951822009-03-04T00:19:00.004-05:002009-03-04T02:56:28.207-05:00

Hi! I'm just checking in to talk more about the things I do to make myself feel pretty. ;-)Vaseline should be a staple of your first aid kit, as well as a regular part of your beauty routine. Each night, put a little bit of Vaseline on your eyelashes. Over time, it makes them thicker (I swear!) and it does a fabulous job of conditioning your lashes. As a result, your mascara goes on smoother and

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-32004184957708342032009-02-24T01:06:00.006-05:002009-02-24T02:57:58.087-05:00

While I enjoy reading fashion magazines, their pages are filled with models that are not representative of my body type, wearing clothes that I cannot afford, crafted into ensembles by stylists who, although creative, leave me questioning their perspective of reality when it comes to how women dress in their daily lives.To counter these issues, I've been faithfully visiting The Working Closet

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-21207393622330780232009-02-16T13:00:00.001-05:002009-02-16T15:52:34.321-05:00

In this edition of Ultrasound: it's not all baby pictures we meet a young man who comes to the ER with testicular pain.Me: "What seems to be the problem?"Him: "I think I have that thing where your balls get twisted up."Me: "Testicular torsion?"Him: "Yeah! That's it."Me: "Why do you think you have testicular torsion?"Him: "Because my nuts hurt real bad."Me: "Uh-huh. And how long have you had this

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-85265927424452624112009-02-15T00:08:00.003-05:002009-02-15T00:36:41.692-05:00

Nathan,You may stubbornly refuse to even look at an instruction manual. You may throw your wool sweaters in the laundry after wearing them just once. You may complain about a self-inflicted, minor sports-related injury while I am laid up eight-and-a-half months pregnant with your second child.But my life without you? It would suck.That's why I'm glad that today is the anniversary of your birth.

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-32817821607422960702009-02-14T05:36:00.002-05:002009-02-14T06:03:25.954-05:00

(And now I have this Pixies song stuck in my head.)print from etsy.

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-3020835664732964342009-02-13T04:06:00.001-05:002009-02-13T04:29:35.407-05:00

When Rhys was born and I had quit working, I could no longer justify spending exorbitant amounts of money on beauty products. A lot of it had to do with my self-inflicted guilt for not bringing in any income, but a lot of it stemmed from the realization that it's not really necessary for me to use $20 hairspray when a $2 bottle can work just as well. Motherhood has brought out the crazy in me,

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-32885910919002496972009-02-13T00:39:00.004-05:002009-02-13T03:10:24.339-05:00

"I hope you have a daughter one day, and I hope that she grows up to be exactly like you!"Well, Mom, you got your wish. I'm going to have a child made of sugar and spice and everything nice. That is what you meant by exactly like me, right?I'm so excited! Let the shopping commence.Thank you all for your kind words and well-wishes. The winner of the Real Simple magazine subscription is...Dri of

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-74463252783809073852009-02-11T09:59:00.005-05:002009-02-11T10:14:21.102-05:00

I consistently have to look at a woman whose foundation is three shades darker than her natural skin tone. At least that's my guess, based on the color difference between her jaw and her neck. She liberally applies bronzer for blush, her eyeshadow enhances the dark circles under her eyes, and her lipstick washes her out. I can't even begin to address her harshly drawn eyebrows.I know, I'm coming

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-86718968376576568002009-02-10T23:10:00.009-05:002009-02-11T01:17:46.602-05:00

As Rhys' first birthday loomed near, I took on a task far more laborious and stressful than party planning: research. The time had finally come. For me, the issue was never about whether or not to vaccinate. For me, the issue was whether or not I could feel totally confident with my decision to vaccinate my child. Did I have all of the information? Could I live with my decision if, for some

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-62622680506189231032009-02-06T01:00:00.003-05:002009-02-06T02:57:23.164-05:00

...my blog sucks.I just want you to know that I know that.The countdown clock on the left (you know, the one with the creepy little floating baby in it) tells me that I have 54 days to go. But, if this pregnancy is anything like my first one, I have about a month before I contribute to global warming climate change by bringing another human being into the world. Kids, man. They ruin

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-62550898745221452312009-01-26T14:28:00.001-05:002009-01-27T02:46:17.226-05:00

1. Gray. It's the new beige as far as neutrals go. I have spoken.2. Having a bad hair day today. I'm getting my hair did tomorrow, and something like a good hair day falling on the day before I'm psyched to try something new really toys with my delicate emotions.3. Rhys taking my keys to the back door, trying to stick them in a non-existent keyhole, and turning around and waving as he says "

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1174811652282195135.post-14446191683407696672009-01-25T23:16:00.002-05:002009-01-25T23:23:35.013-05:00

1. Sleeping in. 2. The excitement of going to pick up Rhys after 24 hours apart.3. Fighting over who gets to hold him first.4. The exchange of hugs and kisses.5. Being "just" someone's mom.

t.w.i.t.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09957602758023004487noreply@blogger.com0