mainestage

Wise Monkey Says...

2009-07-06T22:49:00.007+08:00

One of the many reasons why a relationship fails is because of the surrounding people.

Too much opinions, too much judgements, too much comments and too much input.

Genuine and sincere advises are of course very much appreciated, but there are just people who has the tendency to put words in other people's mouth, or purposely let loose not-so-nice comments, with the intention to sabotage or wreck or psycho a relationship.

Words really affects a person. It messes with your mind, confuses you, deposits negativity into you, and makes you think too much... Thinking too much is really dangerous. I damn pantang that.

At this moment... all I can say and express it that, I'm just feeling thankful for everything that I am and have.

PS: Cousin sis is able to talk and eat porridge + watermelon already. That's a great relieve. Yesterday when we visited her, she still couldn't talk. But when she saw us, she waved her hand and gave us a thumbs up. Even now when I recall that moment, my heart still aches. It's scary to think back that on Friday night... the family almost lost her.

What's Up with 2009?!

2009-07-05T00:39:00.003+08:00

I really don't know how to describe all that's happened recently...

My grandma has been diagnosed with tumors in her lung and brain, and on Friday night, just 10 mins before the gang was supposed to pick me up to Taiping, mom received a call from dad saying cousin sis is in the hospital. Collapsed in shopping mall. Unconscious. Critical stage.

"What??!!" was all we could think of. Mom started tearing. I was controlling as well. Everyone was worried sick. The atmosphere was tense.

I had to pull out of Taiping trip at the last minute. It was supposed to be a happy affair. I was supposed to go with the gang to support Wawa & TC's wedding lunch reception. I felt bad for making everyone kelam kabut and worried.

Went to the hospital but we weren't allowed to enter the ICU. All we could do is wait outside and talk among family. Cousin's dad and husband described what happened and her current situation to us. It's heart breaking...

Internal bleeding in her brain... and she's only 28?

But I thank God that her husband was at her side when it all happened. Thank God that without hesitation, he immediately took her to the hospital when she complained a severe headache at the shopping mall. Before she passed out, she actually called grandma to ask for her shoe size. She wanted to buy grandma a new pair of shoes...

She is now sedated; knocked out; unconscious. The doctors are doing their level best to first stop the bleeding, and stabilize her condition before moving ahead with second operation, to tackle the broken artery.

Life is so unpredictable. One minute everything is fine and merry, the other minute could be a whole different story.

I wish her a speedy and full recovery. I hope there will be no post-operation complications... I hope her fighting spirit will be stronger and stronger. She's been through too much for her age.

Agony

2009-07-02T22:01:00.005+08:00

A friend created a short film entitled 'Agony' recently.

The funny thing is, he and I never really talked back in high school, but somehow Facebook and new technology got us connected.

It started off with a message I posted on Facebook, asking if anyone has David Archuleta's showcase tickets to give away.

He said he has two of it.

He came to meet me at BSC taxi stand past midnight just to pass me the tickets.

But at the end, I didn't go... due to certain reasons. Sigh, I know... wasted huh? :(

Anyway, fast forward to very recently, he showed me his short film entry for BMW Shorties competition.

I watched, and I felt funny inside, because it's as though it's talking to me.

The short started with a moody looking videographer walking into an empty-looking home. While having his packed dinner in front of the computer, he does some editing on a wedding assignment. Then, continues to burn the completed work into a DVD. He progresses into his room to play the wedding video on the DVD player. While watching the footage, the videographer felt immense loneliness... He eventually broke down, and breaks the DVD into pieces.

I relate to the story not because of the breaking-DVD-into-pieces part, but the loneliness-while-watching/editing-wedding-assignments part.

I admit one of the reason why I venture into my new found love-wedding photography, be it reading renown wedding photographers' blog or actually carrying out the task, is because I feel very drawn towards a couple's love for each other. My mind escapes for a short duration whenever I'm looking through the pictures...

To me, it's something rare and difficult to be attained; It's something so precious and magical; It's something I don't see myself having. Sometimes, I feel very warm inside while looking at the pictures, I feel touched knowing there is real love, alot of them. Other times, I feel sad and emotional, thinking to myself, I'll never have that. OK, maybe never is a heavy word, but that's how I really feel at the moment.

That reminds me of something.

Last week, I had the opportunity to do a presentation to the Managing Director. After the preso, we discussed and somehow, the topic diverted into 'inspirations'. He spoke alot on the things that he recently found interest in, like digital drawing, BBQ & grill (yeah, of all things) etc. One thing he said that stuck onto my mind since then was something along this lines:

"What you have shown me is good, but you're missing a point. Now, it's like, you're preparing for a wedding but you don't know what is the reason for your wedding/marriage".

Then he turned to me, "Are you married?"

I said no.

"Why do couples get married?", he posted that question to us all.

He paused and then said out loud and clear, "Because of love, as simple as that".

For a grown man to express his thoughts about love in public, somehow, it touches me. I don't know why... maybe it's because all along, I've always felt that men never show their true feelings or express their love in any obvious way. DNA, ego or whatever reason... I don't know and I'll never know. That's why, whenever a man shows his love in public, I just... feel very emotional.

It's really hard to describe the feeling that I'm feeling right now... if you can relate to what I've blabbered above, thank you for understanding. If you are scratching your head and feeling puzzled at my silliness, I also thank you for actually reading this entry till the end.

Actually that reminds me of another thing. You know after that preso to the MD, I was thinking to myself, I am able to express and deliver what I want to say to colleagues and others without problems, but whenever it comes to personal talks with my loved ones, somehow, I just lose the ability to voice out and express. It's like crippled. I really wonder why I'm like this. I am a completely different person at work and home. In a way, it's a good thing cuz I don't like to mix both personal and work together. I can be a good friend but I may be a difficult person to work with. At work, I kinda keep to myself and I just realize I'm pretty antisocial. To me, work is work.

Anyway, why the serious talk at this time right? Off to my bed and pillows...

PS: Watched True Hollywood Stories: Michael Jackson on Astro earlier on. Just let him rest in peace for goodness sake, he's been through so much already, it's time for him to truly rest.

Growing Up With You

2009-06-30T22:40:00.005+08:00

There's a song played on radio regularly that pretty sums up my feeling towards our relationship...

"Better" by Boyzone

Our love has changed

It's not the same

And the only way to say it

is say it..it's better

I can't conceal

This way I feel

For all the times we spend together

Forever just gets better

Seem what I'm try to say is

You make things better

And no matter what the day is

With you here it's better

I stand by you

If you stand by me

I think it's time that I reveal it

Cause I believe it

It's better

Seem what I'm try to say is

You make things better

And no matter what the day is

If you're here it's better

Ooh the more I write song to you

I'm fall in love with everything you do

Oooh..

Seem what I'm try to say is

You make things better

And no matter what the day is

With you here it's better

Our love has changed

It's not the same

And the only way to say it

is say it..it's better

Guys Who Gives Other Guys A Bad Name

2009-06-22T22:19:00.001+08:00

While traveling back from Penang earlier on, my colleague and I had various topics of conversations. One of it troubled and greatly disgusted me.

In short, he feels it's perfectly normal for a guy (even one who has a girlfriend or married) to engage in sexual activities with other ladies. According to him, it's a free world, and it doesn't mean a thing. He said, if a woman were to seduce a guy with her assets and all, he will definitely 'makan' and not waste the opportunity. Again, he says it doesn't mean a thing; it's only to satisfy the urge and giving in to temptations/seductions.

Oh man, that conversation made me sick.

He also told me recently, he and his friends arranged a Russian stripper for a friend's bachelor night. After the strip tease and all, that groom-to-be actually did it with the Russian stripper. I was like, 'What???!' How could he?! And I know that guy... Suddenly I feel disappointed with men.

I felt more sick inside.

And they say, men are higher social beings. What sets us apart from animals is that we can make logical choices and think. When I hear guys act in a way like this, I just feel no respect for them anymore. They are no different from animals. I feel sorry for his wife.

I just don't get it. He has a daughter... and daughters will become women one day. What will he feel if his daughter, in the future, gets treated that way? John Mayer's song 'Daughter' suddenly means alot.

I know it's not right to judge, but I just don't care at this moment.

Some women would say, 'As long as he comes home at the end of the day, I don't care what he does outside'.

I say, a guy like this, don't expect me to welcome him home. He doesn't deserve a home to come home to.

I'm very very thankful that all guy friends and important men in my life, are nothing close to guys mentioned by my colleague. Good and decent guys do exist. I told him that, and he was skeptical, as though I'm naive and innocent. I feel sorry for him, because he looks at life that way-so unhealthy and immoral.

We all have choices... don't say you had bad judgement lah, body took over mind lah, it doesn't mean anything lah and all those shit.

Whatever said and done, I have no respect for men and women who are disloyal and unfaithful.

Life is Too Short

2009-06-17T07:23:00.003+08:00

I just got news that my friend is soon losing his father. He was told he has approximately two months time left.

The news saddens me.

I really can't imaging losing a loved one.

One thing that frightens me is that his father is battling with a failing liver due to Hepatitis B.

My dad has Hepatitis B too. Dormant though.

My heart goes out to this friend and his family.

His father's last wish is to see him get married in a church. This Thursday, he will be fulfilling his father's wish.

And this Sunday is Father's Day...

Life Now

2009-06-11T23:53:00.001+08:00

Neither here nor there.

Another May Wedding

2009-06-09T21:52:00.005+08:00

With a brand new CF card in place, I'm ready to snap snap snap again!

Here's some pictures from a recent wedding:

The two brothers - Quah B.Hui & B.Bi taking an ang pao from the newly weds:

The bride's father having a blast:

On a super random note, I've always believed: "Treat people well, and they will appreciate and reciprocate". Sadly, that's rarely the case for me. I wonder, what is it that I'm not doing right?

Squeezing in an Update

2009-06-02T21:30:00.004+08:00

Super duper busy lately... work + wedding photography & editing + side job + keeping touch etc. I was so tempted to book a ticket during the MAS everyday low fare promotion... almost booked a ticket but didn't. :(

Anyway, the data in my CF card has been retrieved. Yeah, RM1,150 burnt just like that. But looking through the recovered pictures, I felt relieve and glad and thankful. Grateful because my work and effort was not put to waste; relieve because I am able to deliver the end product to the customer. I bought myself a new CF card though - this time, a reliable brand - Kingston. 8GB for RM150. The corrupted Kingmax CF card? I'm gonna burn it into pieces when I'm free. Grrr...

So here's a few pictures from a recent wedding. The couple is Boonyee's childhood friend - both of them are high school sweet hearts! They've been together for close or more than 10 years already. Really salute couples of such... and it's really touching to see them tie the knot, though I only know them for less than three years.

This is my favorite shot:

After the 'Ji Mui' obstacles, the groom finally meets his lovely bride. He's a funny man... when he came in the door, he greeted his wife, 'Hi lou poh zai...' and the wife replied, 'Hi lou gong zai'. Cute and sweet way to greet each other during a Chinese wedding ceremony.

Look at his smile... so radiant.

If you know the story behind this two love birds... you'll feel alot more for them. I kinda understand their situation, so my respect goes to them for hanging on for so long.

My all-time favorite shot - Dusk. Taken outside of the restaurant... these moments, you can't help but to sigh with appreciation.

The newly weds during their red carpet moment. I love confetti! It just makes a wedding celebration more cheerful.

Genuine smiles...
Out of focus but I like this shot - sweet.

You can find more of the photos on my official wedding photography website: jasemaine-gan.com soon.

And just to share with you one last picture - this is the groom's eldest brother with his daughter. So cute huh?! Made me all warm and fuzzy when I look at this picture.

Acoustic Showdown + Dad's Car + Corrupted CF Card

2009-05-26T09:19:00.004+08:00

* 27th May performance @ Acoustic Showdown canceled *

Picture by Shah

The performance at Acoustic Showdown went pretty well. Was extremely sleepy while waiting for the gig to start - yawning non-stop and just stoning. And guess what, I was the first to be picked to perform, pretty glad.

I felt bad for the people sitting just in front of me. The stage was high and I was wearing sandals that night... And I've not trim my toenails for some time (I know I know...). Felt bad that they had to see my ugly feet and toes. Felt bad and paiseh -_-"

Been semi-super busy lately. Alot of things to look forward to and alot of work piling up. Thank God for making each task cope-able.

Someone crashed into my dad's Accord last week. Damage is pretty bad. It's the second time that this Accord has been hit by another car. So, naturally, parents decided it's time to change to a new car. It was the first and last car we went to see. The condition is tip-top (though it's silver, not my favorite color), the engine is quiet, suits my dad's driving, spacious and comfortable (Accord seats suck!). They've been discussing on selling the 180SX as well, but frankly, I tak sampai hati. Though it's super inconvenient when I need to deliver or transport heavy equipments for training purposes (we're talking about huge boxes of computers and equipments), I still like the car overall. It's been with me for the past 7 years. I can't believe I've been driving the same car since I got my license.

Anyway, what will be, will be, I guess.

And a lesson that I've learnt in this past few weeks. When it comes to technology, never skimp or buy at cheap price.

Remember the CF card I mentioned in my previous entries? So here's what happened:

- Used it for the first time on May 20, 2009. Managed to upload some pictures in the afternoon. When I came back at night to continue uploading, the computer couldn't read the card anymore. I know what you're thinking, 'Maybe you didn't eject the card properly etc etc'. Hello, it's my job to tell and show my clients how to eject a volume properly. I have ejected the volume properly, as always.

- On Monday, brought it to a technician in PJ. He used to fix computers for me. Said it will take one-two days to retrieve.

- After the 'one-two' days he promised. He said, 'Give me a few more days'.

- After a week plus, when I asked about the status, he said, 'Let me send it to a friend of mine, he can retrieve it within three-four days. Charging RM600-800'. In my head I said, 'Screw you', but in reality I told him I will collect back the card and bring it to someone else. Then he replied, 'OK he can give lower price of RM300', at that moment I was like, 'WTF!'

- Picked up the card from him, the next day, went to a company that specializes in retrieving data.

- One to two days later, the admin called and quoted me, RM1150. Yes, I almost puke blood. Seriously. I told her to let me think for a while.

- After half a day passed by, I called her and told her to proceed. At that point, I just want everything to be over and done with. Really upset but nothing I can do.

- Now, waiting for them to retrieve the data. They said it will take 5-10 working days. It's day three so far.

- The CF card, I bought it at a exhibition. I think it was around RM160+ for 16GB. All that money, burnt. :(

- Yesterday night, went and bought Kingston brand CF card, 8GB for RM150.

- Sigh.

Need a break. Seriously. Beach, sea breeze, lazing around, sleep... I seriously need to take a break from a lot of things. Don't really feel happy anymore.

Acoustic Showdown @ Urban Attic Caps Square

2009-05-18T20:42:00.004+08:00

Hey everyone, I'll be performing at Acoustic Showdown @ Urban Attic Caps Square this Wednesday (May 20th) 10pm. It's actually an acoustic competition. Yeap, competition. Why did I join? Because I've been itching to perform for the longest time and this event just came in the way, talk about good timing.

So 20th May is solo act; 27th May is group act (my brother's childhood friend CY will be playing the bongo for me).

I've yet to decide on which song to sing though... super sleepy and tired right now.

So if you're free or around the area, do drop by ya? :)

PS: My CF card can be rescued afterall! Still got another 50-60% to go though, can't wait. I still can't believe I forked out money to buy a faulty 16GB CF card... ouch on my purse.

Why??!!!!

2009-05-14T22:14:00.005+08:00

I really can't believe it.

Danny Gokey is out???? :(

Kris Allen???? Puh-lizzzzzzzzz!

No offense to Kris Allen's fan. I admit he did a good job with the cover of Kayne West's song but all in all, compared to Adam Lambert and Danny Gokey, he is no where close lah!

I liked Danny Gokey from the very start. I admire his love for his wife and his soulful voice, not forgetting his very calm and composed character, and... and... his sexy, yummy aura. *wink* I'm kinda drawn to guys like this - reserved, low profile, cool, peaceful, mysterious (mm-mm). Pour in a lil' powerhouse vocal, mix it up and I'm immediately hooked. Hooked hooked hooked.

I'm pretty sure he's already got a record deal but it'll be interesting to watch the showdown between him and Adam.

While re-watching his audition video clip (I lost count of the number of times I've watched it), the way he talks about his wife, the way he looks at his wife (in the pictures) really touched my heart. Suddenly I understood why I venture into wedding photography. It's always when the groom looks into his bride's eyes, or steals a glance and genuinely smile at her that always make my heart melts; that makes the hard work all worthwhile. :D

"Some people spend their entire lifetime searching for their soul mate but to no avail". I hope I won't fall into that category.

Alexis Bistro @ Gardens + My New Workspace

2009-05-13T19:56:00.002+08:00

It was a jam packed week last week.

Went for outstation trip a few days, and spent Saturday with family and friends. During the night, went over to Alexis Bistro Gardens to celebrate Grace's birthday.

I ordered this beef burger. Verdict? Not nice - I don't know what vegetable they use but it's just aweful, plus the beef patty is too peppery-beefy for my liking. Suddenly, McDonald's Cheeseburger seems like the ultimate burger, compared to this one.

Some chicken the birthday girl had... they used the same aweful vegie. Chicken... so-so ler. Nothing to shout about.

This is my favorite of the night - the Pollo Pizza. The crust is really light and crispy and the cheese topping is really nice, just nice, to be exact. The fillings are aromatic and tasty as well. A must-try :)

The total damage of the night? RM300+. I know, freakin' expensive right? Six girls and a table of food and drinks. It was a nice catch-up session though. I guess that makes it up.

Then on Sunday, woke up at 6am+ and got ready for Boonyee's friend Ah Kwang and Kar Kwai's big day. I was assigned as the photographer, which I was really looking forward to.

It was a tiring tiring session though - lots of thorough traditional rituals and emotional moments.

One thing that I am super worried now is that, the CF card I used is... corrupted. :( Yes, corrupted. Luckily, on that afternoon itself, after the ceremony, I did import the morning session's photos. Now, the wedding dinner reception photos are at stake. Please, pray for me that the photos can be saved. And the thing is, I just bought the card from the DCIM fair. 16GB Kingmax CF card. It was my first time using it on that day, talk about reliability and stuff huh.

*Crosses fingers* and sighs.

Anyway, on Monday, moved into the new office at PJ. The office is like, 70% done and the lobby/main area is like, 20% done? So on that day itself, my colleagues and I went to the pharmacy after lunch time to buy face mask. I was having a headache and this few days, when I come home, my throat and air-way feels 'dusty'. It's really bad :(

But I like the fact each workstation's partition is higher now. I love the privacy, seriously. :) Gonna occupy the green area with pictures soon. And you may notice the two large Rock Band instrument box under my table - guess what, that's part of the job, hoho. We're setting one of it in the entertainment room soon. Frankly, a good game to de-stress and relax.

My Past Week

2009-05-09T11:38:00.007+08:00

Pictures taken with my trusted Canon Ixus 30! Thought I bring it out with me since it's fixed :)

There was no queue at Krispy Kreme Berjaya Times Square (located right next to the main entrance - opposite side of Starbucks), and it was the second day of launch. Without thinking much I ordered for the combo set - two sets of original glaze Krispy Kreme doughnuts (one box has 12 pieces!) for I think RM33+. I remember the time I had my first KK doughnut at Korea... just as we stepped into the shop, we were offered with a free original glazed doughnut and man... it was just fantastic. Not too sweet, not oily, just nice.

While driving home, I couldn't wait to sink my teeth into the doughnuts...

When I did though, I was disappointed. It was too sweet! Very jelak! :( So different from the one I had in Korea... One thing for sure is that I won't be missing KK doughnuts anymore.

Last weekend went to a baby full moon buffet dinner. One thing about new developments today is that, the roads are spacious! I really like that. Hate neighborhood roads that are cramp and narrow.

So anyway, the highlight of the night was not the baby actually. It was, BiBi. Look at him.

So cute huh?! And he was so well behaved - no barking, no tantrums no sign of distress or anything negative. Allowing the kids to pat him and just being a nice sweet puppy.

And here's a picture of my table/space being cleared off. Getting ready to move into the new office on Monday! I've been working here for close to 8-9 months, I'm gonna miss it.

The small meeting room behind my seat. Nice view of the lake eh? But I don't like it when there's a meeting going on inside, kinda feel pressured to know that there are many people behind me.

This is the entrance to the office - level 7. It's abit messy cuz everyone is packing!

This is the walkway I use to get to my car after work.

I'm gonna miss my parking spot...

Cuz I won't be greeted by this scenery anymore. Never fails to make me relax after a day's work.

On Wednesday (May 6th) morning, I went to Sunway UC to conduct a training for the students. The duration was drastically shorten because I was lately notify of a outstation trip. Feel sorry for cutting the training short actually. Doesn't do justice. But hopefully will get another chance to do more sessions with them, to make it up to the college.

So on that day, right after Sunway UC, it was my first experience driving outstation alone. The furthest I've drove to is KLIA. I've never driven to Genting Highlands, Malacca or any of those must-know-how-to-drive-there-destination. I was pretty anxious the night before but when I took on the road, I felt calm... Thank God for that. After only 20mins of drive, I was yawning ferociously and my eyes were half shut. So boring lah!!!

And after two hours (faster than I expected), I finally spotted the location I needed to be there - Perak Techno Trade Center (PTTC). To get there, it's very straightforward, just exit using the Jelapang/Chemor toll. I thought the building looks like Batman, hehe.

Destination: K-Perak Academy.

Assignment: To join in Tab Kids training for selected primary + secondary school teachers. Tab Kids is a 2D animation software for children. Very fun even for adults like us! I manage to create a short animation of a Panda... probably upload it soon for you to watch.

My colleague requested me to do a 'speed' introduction of Mac for the teachers. We kinda like squeezed ourselves into the schedule. No time shall be wasted!

For that 3D2N training session, it was also my first time staying at a hotel room alone. Casuarina Impiana Hotel is located just next to UMNO building, can you imagine that! We actually walked pass a group of BN supporters and also experienced road blocks/road closures... reminded me of the beef protest back in Korea. It's always interesting to be present at the actual scene - personally feel the tension and all.

And man it was so nice to have a nice room all to myself!!! Take my own sweet time at the bathroom... all the pillows to myself... :D That's why I woke up in the morning smiling like this:

The blur-blur-but-happy-look.

I wasn't myself lately... more emo than usual. It wasn't intended, and I couldn't explain why and what was causing me to be emo. Is it work? Is it family? Is it hormones? Is it the weather? Anyway, when I was talking to him on the phone, I told him that I miss him. I not only miss him physically, but I miss the times when I can just laugh and not worry about anything when I'm with him. I miss the lightness in my heart. I miss being carefree. I think I found myself back during the business trip to Ipoh. It's been ages since I had a vacation. I think it's important for people to take some time off; alone times. It really clears the mind and put things into perspective. I long for a vacation... traveling around places when I'm young is something I want and look forward to. 'Cuz you never know what will happen.

I Ain't No Saint

2009-05-05T01:37:00.005+08:00

Maine,

What's wrong with you?

With everyone else, you're brave, independent, strong, confident and sometimes funny. You don't give a shit about anything and you appear laid back and relax; calm and composed. You tell people to f-off if something upsets you or angers you. You know how to tell people how you feel and what you expect of them. You make sure your message gets across and never worry about how you'll appear as. But with him? It seems that you've lost all power. It's like he's the kryptonite that weakens your defenses and makes you vulnerable and fragile; so easily distressed and affected emotionally. Why? I wonder why as well. I'm not a saint. I have a temper too. I am only human. I may be unreasonable at times. Let me be unreasonable at times. Accept me for who I am and how I behave at the moment. Love me even when I'm not acting like myself. Love me even when I'm giving you a hard time. Love me even when I sulk or throw tantrums (I wish I could sulk and throw tantrums). Love me even when I'm angry, down, grumpy, pissed off, quiet and detached. It's at these times I need you most. Don't ask me what or why or this or that, I have no answers. Why do people say sorry when they don't mean it? Does it make everyone feel better? No, it does not. Why do I feel guilty for telling how I feel? I feel like I don't have the right to be angry or upset. Anyway, I'm not too sure what point I'm trying to make in this entry, just need to channel some rubbish off my chest that's all. I wished blogspot had the option to lock entries. I wished I could just move to a new blog but I love the name 'mainestage' too much to give it up. This blog has given me comfort throughout the years and it's almost impossible to leave it. Thing is, I don't like it when people think I'm broadcasting my life to the whole world through this blog. I said it ages ago, this blog is my emotional thrash can. So let me write in peace. Love me as I am. Don't ask why I'm like this or that. Don't tell me why I shouldn't feel the way I feel. Love me as I am.

Missing Piece

2009-04-29T23:00:00.002+08:00

I know I've said this alot of times, but I just feel like saying it another time.

Something still feels not in place. Something's missing in my life.

Wawa & TC Video Shoot + Lovely Weekend

2009-04-20T22:41:00.003+08:00

Saturday morning, I was actually feeling stressed after receiving a phone call from aunt and a vendor. Family and work related stress, great. I tried to brush it off my mind and focused on the shoot for Wawa and TC.

It turned out to be really fun. I was actually worried because I've not done anything similar before.

So the day started with makeup @ wawa's place. We took some shots at her place.

Then we headed off to TC's place to get his bedroom scenes done (uh, scenes like waking up and reading a book, what were you thinking).

After that, we went to 1U Fish 'n Co for lunch and at the same time, took a few scenes in and out of the restaurnat, cuz it's a nostalgic place for both wawa and tc. A few more scenes around the shopping area, we went to the park right opposite tc's house. The park isn't filled with lush green grass or blooming flowers (if only it was) but somehow the scenes that we took there, I personally felt like, 'awwww so sweet...' Hopefully others think the same lah.

Some random shots: Erin on the swing.

Took a few shots (actually I was snapping like mad) of Carmen as well but not too sure if she'd like me to put it up... By the way, Carmen will be setting a booth at Monash Music Festival this Saturday so please go check it out! She's got really cool accessories and clothes to offer :) Have a look at her website.

Here's two random shots of the stars of the day. I really like this one (below) cuz it's so spontaneous, cute and somehow, loving. lol.

This one (below) is the scene where tc asks wawa to be his girlfriend. The scenery and all quite Korean drama ler, which is cool.

The shoot ended at around 4pm and it started drizzling, what a good timing.

-------

We managed to find the movie at Midvalley. While paying at the counter, I saw Jason Mraz's limited edition CD (album + ep + dvd) for less than RM40! What a bargain!

"Buy la"

"Don't want lah" and I placed it back, thinking that we already have the album.

While walking away from the shop, he made me believe that he was looking at the movie he bought, but when I turn my head over, after a few seconds of registration, I realize he was holding the Jason Mraz CD!

It features a live concert DVD! Did you know few years back, I was inspired to perform live because of Jason Mraz? His live performances is so cool, so fun and I always thought, 'It'll be great if I had showmanship like him'.

Thanks Sayang! :) "Cuz we're only human... yes we are-are-ah-ah-ahhh-ah-ah-ah..."

PS: Still don't like the album art though -_-"

Doggies

2009-04-15T19:56:00.003+08:00

Dogs are SO difficult to photograph!

90% of the pictures are blur; all turned out to be like a lump of hair ball literally.

So here's some better ones...

And here's mini BY in his new home...

Feeling Emotional

2009-04-11T01:31:00.003+08:00

Boy... this has been such an emotional week.

Where do I even start?

First off, it is confirmed that grandma has a nodule/lil' lump in one of her lungs. The procedure this time round will be very risky and tricky compared to the times she had colon cancer (she underwent two operations for that). She's putting up a strong face but I know deep down she's very very very worried and sad.

The other night when I fetched her back from the CT scan session, again we found grandpa lying facedown on the floor. The sight of him helpless is really heart aching.

A good thing that came out from this two events is that, they finally agreed to get a maid to help out in the house. Finally, we all can take a breath of relief. A maid will really help ease the burden and stress. I hope she comes soon and I pray she'll be a good helper.

Tonight, or technically a few hours ago, the car which was a part of our lives went to a new owner. I knew I will be sad, but I never expected that I'll get so emotional, let alone cry.

I thought of all the memories we had with the car.

If it's not for it, we wouldn't have met.

On the way back, he told me what matters most is we still have each other. I was really touched when he said that.

One thing I didn't tell him, is that I'm proud of him. I know it's very difficult and heart aching for him, but he did it.

You're doing fine baby. Most importantly is that you had a good run with the car :)

- When we first met... back in 2005 -

Old Age and Sickness

2009-04-06T21:20:00.003+08:00

The deadly combination. The unavoidable events of a human's life.

I said it some time ago. When I see old people who are weak and, well, old, I feel sad. Sometimes I look away, because I know I won't be able to stand the feeling. The sorrowful feeling.

When you know one of your family member will be going through a series of serious and heavy medications/procedures, especially when she's of old age, you feel helpless. And sad.

"Come more often ya... must come over or call me when you're free, mama has got not much time you know".

How do you answer that?

My only hope is when the time comes, my loved ones and myself will leave this world in peace. That's all.

Good Days

2009-04-05T10:07:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was a pretty interesting day.

Attended a Rotary Club meeting at 7:30am on a Saturday morning (I was actually a lil' grumpy as I felt obliged to go). The session was better than expected... there was the updates by each leader and guest speaker session by two relationship coaches, advocating Dr John Gray's Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus. I've been avoiding that book but eventually, it crept upon me. Insightful session though.

After an hour or two, went back home and had nice talk with dad. Then, I went to Midvalley with the intention to buy a lens cap for my A200 (dad lost it during my performance at Actor's Studio), but they had no stock, so had to place an order. Took some time to drool over different brands of DSLR, went to MPH and got more magazines (seriously, I've been spending alot of magazines and books recently), then went home and drool more over the DSLR pictures at home, on the couch, which is something I've not done since a long, long time.

Had lunch with parents at home, talked more and setup the new printer dad bought. We had quite a good time, printing out our own pictures and alot of other stuff. At a point, we had a to troubleshoot something but I've tried every possible method but to no avail. Frankly I was really really tired and sleepy (had a late night on Friday and had to wake up early on Saturday) so I surrendered and went for a nap.

Late evening, he came and pick me up, went to Floristika to buy flowers for his grandparents, then off to Curve/Cineleisure, had a quick bite and off to watch Pantas & Garang 4. Nothing great and nothing bad about the movie, but the couple seats are actually not very comfortable. To add to that, I didn't really feel the air-cond. :\

Such a good day yesterday. Today will be better!

The Guy In My Mind

2009-03-30T22:05:00.006+08:00

The guy that I had and have in mind, is someone who can effortlessly and naturally makes me laugh, laughs with me, and laughs at my jokes (girls also got ego ok).

The guy I have in mind, is someone who allows me to be who I am, and is not afraid to show me his weak side; that we're only human.

The guy I have in mind, is someone who showers me with surprises even after being together for a long, long time. It's because a guy who plans surprises for me is a guy who takes in consideration what are my likes and dislikes. To me, planning for surprises requires alot of homework and research. To me, it's the effort that always matters most.

The guy I have in mind, is someone who makes me feel so wanted and needed; who makes me feel like the most important person in his life; who makes me feel that his life has been made better because of me.

The guy I have in mind, is my personal cheerleader. Supporting everything that I want to embark on, and gives me his input and advices along the way.

The guy I have in mind, will never make me wonder if he's the right one for me.

He will make me fall in love with him over and over again.

He's a person who stays true to his words.

He's a person who involves me in his favorite activities and in turn, accompanies and participates in my hobbies.

He's a person who shows me appreciation.

He's a person who feels the need to always reassure his love for me; never assuming I would know without telling.

He's a person who I can chat with about anything and everything; a person I can have both silly and serious conversation with.

He's a person who plans for our future and assures my family I am taken care of; that they don't have to worry for me anymore.

He's a person who looks forward to building a life together; never afraid of the future because he knows he has me by his side.

Good Sunday

2009-03-29T21:50:00.006+08:00

Today was such a relaxing day... seems like a long time since I had a day like this.

Nothing out of the blue.

Went to Midvalley in the morning and had breakfast. Went to the restaurant and sat at our usual place. A few years ago, on our first movie date, when we were still getting to know each other, we had our dinner at the exact location. I still remember the lame jokes he made... and I still remember how we shared food during then.

After that, went to the DCIM exhibition and was kinda disappointed. I was looking forward to find lenses and accessories but the selection is... really limited. I ended up buying a tripod from Fotokem at the ground floor - cheaper and better quality compared to the ones I saw in the exhibition -_-"

Next, we headed to A&W PJ for a quick bite and car viewing session. Right after that, went back home and watched Marley & Me, again.

I realize that alot of people cry while watching Marley & Me. Even guys. The thing I found out was, people get more affected emotionally when they see animals die. Even John Grogan, the author of Marley & Me confessed that he never cried in funerals, but cried for the passing of his dog. I wonder why. Is it because animals will never challenge you, make you upset, hurt you, answer back, show you temper etc, that's why people feel sad when they die? But, people who treats another person too well, e.g. never challenge, never make you upset, answer back, show you temper etc, will always be taken for granted. It's just something that I noticed... most of the time.

Anyway, back to this Sunday. It ended with a nice dinner and ice blended drink. I think tonight my sleep will be sweet and sound. :)

Here's a random picture I took Saturday morning while waiting for the teachers to arrive for the training. It's been ages since I last took a random shot of something - sky, scenery etc.

We use to take random sky shots and email it to each other, to tell the other "hey, you're on my mind". That doesn't happen anymore though... a pity but life goes on.

Met a Nut Head Tonight

2009-03-27T22:32:00.003+08:00

Nut head is such a nice and cute term for the idiot we met a while ago.

After a few days without seeing each other, we finally manage to arrange a supper date at A&W.

Around the corner of A&W, it poured, not cats and dogs, but more of elephants, whales and dinosaurs. It was c.r.a.z.y.

After braving through the rain and getting wet (after a good shower somemore) in the process, we finally arrived at the ordering counter.

While waiting for the waitress to bring us the root beer, I took some curly fries (my fav) and munch munch munch.

While munching, there's this irritating audible mumbling sound going on behind of me... it started to get louder and louder, so I turned my head towards the sound.

This old dude was saying, "Nak makan pergi tepi la orang nak order!"

And he kept on repeating the same damn line.

So I said back, "Belum habis order lah!"

And he KEPT repeating the same bloody line, "Nak makan pergi tepi la orang nak order!!!!" This time with hands waving.

It seems like he didn't understand me. So I raised my voice in anger, "Order belum datang lAAAHhH!!!" while pointing at the waitress who is filling the glasses with root beer.

Guess what, he repeated and repeated and repeated. In a very hostile way.

Even when Boonyee shouted at him, 'Belum bayar lah!" he still kept repeating his lines. It's as though he has no brains.

Inside of me I was boiling. I had a long day. Finally get to meet with my boyfriend after braving through that ridiculous rain and now getting shouted for nothing by a brainless idiot??! Shit!!

Then suddenly a man came from behind and whispered to Boonyee.

Then I was like, 'Ohhh ok no wonder'. And then I cooled down abit.

So, apparently the idiot is a nut case. A real nut case. No wonder the waitresses looked at us apologetically. I think he's a regular there. -_-"

Geram betul.

Back Home

2009-03-26T20:13:00.005+08:00

I tried to revive my jasemaine-gan.com page. Tried to blog there and make it personal. But I just find it difficult. It's just not me. :(

So I decided to 'move' back home. Here, at mainestage.blogspot.com. And keep that one as a 'corporate' page instead.

I find it easier to blabber my feelings here. It's weird. But it's sure is nice to be home. My dear emotional trashcan... :)

So here's some pictures I've taken in recent weeks: