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Swapshop

2007-05-12T18:09:00.000+01:00

This is a great site for exchanging dvds and books. Sign up now and get rid of all your old junk!! Join it now and it'll be the best thing you did. Honest!

SWAPSHOP.co.uk

Cuba-not-so-libre

2006-11-03T18:45:00.000Z

I find it disturbing the amount of hypocrisy that flies around these days. The British media have latched onto Ken Livingtson again like rottweilers to a bone. The complaint is that Ken is stopping off at Cuba whilst going to Venezuela for an Olympic meeting( which happens to be on the way ) at a cost to the taxpayers. So what do the BBc do? They fly a reporter and camera crew out to cuba to find out why he's there. And guess what..it's at a cost to the taxpayer who has to pay over-inflated t.v licences. Ooooh the irony..

Real or no real?

2006-07-05T18:01:00.000+01:00

There seems to be a new fad currently hitting our TV screens. It's called 'bleed as much money out of the TV viewer as possible and pretend we are doing them a favour'. We can see this in any daytime TV programme via a quiz which doesnt just insult your intelligence, it actually confuses you by thinking the answer couldnt possibly be that simple. Ofcourse we all know it is to extort more money out of us than the competition is worth . But we still ldo it. Richard and Judy taunt us gleefully sending us signals of 'cmon,thats so easy you must win.Musn't you?' Well infact no, you musn't. In fact with the amount of people entering you have more chance of standing outside and having a pot of gold drop out of the sky from a one handed flying Lepricaun.
Then we have Noel Edmonds. They up their telephone prize money and it it is all for the goodwill of us regular viewers. Or so he would have us believe. In fact it just means the extra calls mean extra money for themselves. Don't even get me started on the fact that deal or no deal has actually deleted the £250,000 winners so that the viewing figures stay high. Now if thats not indicitive of a manipulative slimy fat cat TV producer then i don't know what is. Come on you lot, stop wasting your money and give it to charity instead!

Clouds Alas!

2006-07-04T10:01:00.000+01:00

Well looks like from tomorrow it's time to sit in and pull out your favourite David Mitchell novel again. In the words of Tony hancock,"Aint it marvellous, eh?" For at least eight months in the year we get cold,dark,cloudy wet miserable weather. For the other four months the humid heat creates...yes, more wet cloudy,miserable weather in the form of thunderstorms.Just in time for my trip to Wimbledon. This in turn creates 'imported thunderstorms'(When in the hell did the weather centre make that one up?).In fact there's only three things you can depend on in the summertime.England won't win the football,Henman won't win the tennis and we won't actually get a decent summer. Tell me again why we live in this crappy country? It's beyond me. Have a nice day. While it lasts! Moan , moan moan....

Big Brother Exclusive: Pete's secret life?

2006-06-28T08:35:00.000+01:00

Well guys this is a pure exclusive from the mole in the know.Even the 'Sun' hasn't got hold of this one yet! Don't ask me how I found this but if you look at the links below you will find out a certain Big Brother contestant's secret life in Brighton.Could it be Pete? Yes guys, it appears that he belongs to a fetish club in his home town of Brighton.Not only this but he's featured in a London gay magazine (look under advertisments:vice in the link below). Not sure what expletives he shouts when he's being whipped though.
http://www.viceparty.com/photos.htm http://qxmagazine.com/pdf/backissues/qx591.pdf

Please ! Narnia drivel Disney..

2006-06-25T21:06:00.000+01:00

After enjoying the last two Harry Potters I settled down last night to watch The lion the witch and the wardrobe thinking I would be getting much the same entertainment . How wrong I was. I had wondered why i hadn't remembered much about the story when I was a kid. Now i know why , there isnt much of one.Half the movie seems to be spent on getting through the wardrobe.Coupled with this the acting is extremely wooden. i can only guess that the person in charge of casting was American and didn't know any better.Some of the effects are very ropey indeed by todays standards and the dialogue is old fashioned a badly done. The only redeeming feature is the cgi Lion .I'm sure some people out there must enjoy the film (three years olds for example)but if your an adult don't waste your time ,just watch Lord of the rings again . You'll get much more enjoyment.

There's Osborne every minute

2006-06-21T22:15:00.000+01:00

You know what really annoys me at the moment? How everyone seems to think that the sun shines out of Sharon Osborne's arse. Not only that, but the amount of airtime we are paying to see her. Just because this Nouveau riche commoner has received enough money from her bat eating,screeching talentless drug addict of a husband to make herself look less like an old hag, does this make her 'nice' all of a sudden? If she was so great why are her cussing spoilt siblings not only rude, obnoxious and obese from obvious lack of discipline. Perhaps if you had spent more time keeping your kids in shape than making money Sharon you might have a more 'normal' family.

Knighthood or just a Hood in the Night?

2006-06-20T12:26:00.000+01:00

I can't believe that Greek git Stelios received a Knighthood. Is the Queen mad? He has made his money buy making thousands of people very frustrated and angry by not having enough planes to take the place of the old scabby ones that always break down. It annoyed us with the trains and it annoys us with the planes.
My own experience with Easyjet(first and last now) was 'flying' from Newcastle to London just before New Year. Everything looked ok until a flight to Scandinavia was cancelled. Then amazingly enough it was back on again and by 'sheer coincidence' our plane was then cancelled due to a problem on 'our' plane. Ofcourse it was impossible to complain.There was no one in charge. As a result they put us in a bus and it took over 12 hours for me to get home. Too tired for New Year celebrations.
Not only do I find it insulting that they most probably lied about swapping planes but also that they expected us to be stupid enough to believe it. i wonder if the Queen has ever flown by Easyjet ? I think not...

'Blow up' is a damp squib

2006-06-20T10:02:00.000+01:00

The other day a few of us decided to visit the free outdoor cinema at Scoop next to City hall. We thought we would take a picnic and some wine and get there early and make a nice evening of it. The movie was an old one called 'Blow up'.An 'art house film' about a murder and a fashion photgrapher made in 1966.I had heard about this film and being interested in not only photography but also arthouse movies was looking forward to it.I had a wonderful evening.Until the movie started that is. people were supposed to get there before 9.15.Not only did people arrive after that time but preceeded to invade our picnic space and look at us as if we were committing a crime. It became apparent after 15 mins into the film that this was one of the worst and certainly the most pretentious of films I have seen from that era. It was a complete load of Italio drivel with some of the worst acting i have ever seen(David Hemmings was never thought of as a good actor even now).
Needless to say the audience became full of pretentious ex public school people and hippies (the sort who would root out anything if it was free). They seemed to be taking this nonsense very seriously indeed. One of these sheep even had the cheek to say that we were being disruptive because we were laughing at the sheer banality of the whole thing and some of the worst metaphors in history. I just wanted to say to those people .Firstly if you really wish to watch one of these types of movies in silence stop being a tight arse and get the dvd! Secondly I can you a list of a thousand better movies you probably haven't even seen just because its not on your pretentious list.Thirdly you should get a life and lighten up. The film really wasnt meant to be taken that seriously. You obvioulsy missed the joke completely guys.

Quote of the week

2006-06-14T08:28:00.000+01:00

Quote from Nikki in Big brother (one of many) on being nominated. "There's no justice in the world is there". Your right Nikki. Your still in the house aren't you....

Icky Nicki

2006-06-06T09:59:00.000+01:00

Does anyone want to strangle Nikki from big brother?I will provide the scarf to do it with. What a wingy, spoilt, vacuous 'dancer' she is . My next door neighbour Winston the worm's babies are more mature than that.

Sezer? Seize Him!

2006-05-23T12:11:00.000+01:00

Well yet another big brother has loomed upon us with the usual selection of nutters. I think Sezer is the only one with any common sense and is being himself which probably means he won't win! Come on everyone spend some money this summer,vote for normality on t.v and put two fingers up to weirdos and nutters for a change!! Don't let this Pete guy win for gods sake. Tourettes is just a product of an undisciplined childhood.

The Ban Dan campaign

2006-05-18T14:23:00.000+01:00

I swear if theres one more programme on tv about the Davinci code and the myths behind it Iam going to take my tv licence bill and stick it right up all the people responsible's arses including Dan Brown.

Hell's Angel with wheels

2006-05-15T08:39:00.000+01:00

What is it about canals that cause cyclists to ride 30 MPH along them without any thought to anyone else? I frequently walk between Hoxton and Angel on the canal and not only do I have to be wary of making any sudden movements to the left or right but have to look behind me constantly as if I have some demented stalker on my trail. As if this wasn't enough when I walk through the tunnels a small tinkle of a bell sound is supposed to signify me diving to one side into the canal to make way for a two wheeled speed freak coming the other way . Take note cyclists , there are various signs telling you to ride at 3 MPH . Follow them. Or next time I shall carry a very strong, large tennis racket and raise it as you ride by.

A grave plea for help!

2006-04-07T08:47:00.000+01:00

Quick question. Does anyone have the codes for the six feet under evening standard dvd from thursday please ? Help me guys!

What a Gall-no-way...

2006-01-23T21:33:00.000Z

I am stunned at the intimate portrait of George Galloway at the moment on Big brother. Does he really think he is clever enough to fool not only the housemates but also the general public? Wrong George! You are completely see through. You are a two faced , devious , hypocritical and possibly evil in it's purist and most dangerous form . Vote O4 and get him out now! Then people of Bow , dont vote for him as an MP. You can't be that dumb can you ? Anyway , I'm off to cape town on wednesday so i won't have to go through any more of this torture!

Pete Gurns?

2006-01-19T14:55:00.000Z

Everyone watch how Pete Burns eats his food. It is the funniest thing I've seen since I visited the countryside and saw the cows chewing the cud. It seems with all that collagen he cannot actualy chew properly and has to swallow his food whole . Ahh ..the price of ugliness.

Dead or alive?

2006-01-18T20:04:00.000Z

Is Pete Burns on clebrity big brother dead or alive , that is the question.He is so reconstructed he is probably clinically dead but apart from this he struts around claiming to be 'colourful,witty and interesting' when really he has nothing interesting to say and I find him dull and boring. His only 'wit' is to slag everyone else off and swear a lot. How dull .

Christ , It's mass already

2005-12-20T12:12:00.000Z

What happened to the last 6 months? One minute i seemed to be sitting out in th ebeautiful sunlight having a picnic with a cool chardonnay. Then it was cold and Cristmassy. happy Christmas everyone and a moley New year.

Big holes in space

2005-07-29T15:12:00.000+01:00

Watched the final star wars last night and i have to say what a load of tosh it was. I was so disapointed yet again. I would have thought Lucas would have learnt his lesson from the previous two films about putting too many unnecessary special effects in. But oh no he just had to do it again. Big loophole in the story also in that surely SOMEONE must have told 'princess' Leia that her dad(anakin skywalker) was later named Darth Vader. Even in space there must be some amount of tittle tattle going on. I had to watch the original star wars when i got home just to renew my faith in the series...no contest.

Quote of the week

2005-07-27T13:40:00.000+01:00

Craig from big brother : That would be my worst nightmare being grey. I would ACTUALLY die.
mole : As opposed to being extremely fat and ugly Craig?

A league of their own

2005-06-05T09:28:00.000+01:00

Just been to see League of gentlemen the apocalypse, much better then the first film ..and no sean Connery anywhere, even better. Congratulations on the film gentlemen. I loved it. Bit of gossip for you , well not really ..spotted Steve racing down Carnaby Street wearing exactly the same cap as his real persona in the film plugged into an ipod. Just wanted to say hope the film goes well just so as Steve can afford to buy a new (and hopefully better) cap.

Big Bother

2005-05-29T09:26:00.000+01:00

Apologies for being away for so long, I've been pretty busy recently. Meanwhile, has anyone seen or been bothered to watch Big brother at all? Is it me, or are the contestants getting stranger every year ? Personally I think this year all of them are stooges apart from 1 who is a real contestant....the Gnome,I hope he wins.

Pigeon post

2005-05-03T09:29:00.000+01:00

I had two pigeons shit on me in two days near London bridge and prior to this it has never happened to me. Is this lucky or not I wonder?Answers on an unsoiled postcard please.

Hitchhiker Thumbs Up

2005-04-29T11:44:00.000+01:00

As I sat down in my cinema seat i was almost as nervous as Tony Blair on question time. Twenty years I had waited for The Hitchhiker's guide to hit the cinema. Did it live up to it's expectations? Well yes it did actually. It was all there, from the dolphins to the Vogons albeit not quite as witty as the tv series but still worth shelling out money to see.Stephen Fry was a worthy successor as the narrator. Mos Def was ok as Ford Prefect albeit a little out of it.In fact a few of the cast seemed like they were on drugs.Lots of explosions and a love theme for the Americans. Minor niggle though: Marvin really should have had his original voice. Alan Rickman is more camp than depressive;although it was good to see the original Marvin in a short scene in the film, watch out for it.All in all a great movie. Go see it!