GOTT MILK ?!? (@blogger)

When You Fast

2009-11-09T09:50:00.000+08:00

It's hard not to look at fasting like it's a way that will help me lose weight, or to associate fasting with the "oh what a great" feeling that I had at various times I've fasted in the past. The temptations to look at it in some other way other than the way that I 'should' look at it adds to the difficulty of looking at it the way that I should.

Naturally I am a man that wants to go my own way. I want to figure things out, resolve problems, and feel good about what I've been able to do. About what 'I' am able to do. This is my nature, my self reliant nature that is by and large separate from God. To go my own way is in it's own admission, to go in a direction that is separate from God's. It is impossible to go my own way and be submissive to God's will at the same time. Here is where fasting comes in for me; at least in one aspect of it. If you could imagine for a moment, my sinful nature;strong looking, just a little off light colored, attractive but murky. However keep in mind that though it 'is' attractive, and it's qualities can be twisted to look good, that these qualities are all in their essence separate from God.

In my illustration I used the phrase "strong looking". Now it is my sinful nature's nature to feed itself. It is hungry and it's nature is to satisfy it's desires; paramount in this is it's desire for pleasure. It doesn't matter what kind of pleasure as long as it can find a weakness in me to exploit. If my weakness is food then it will exploit my desire for it, if my weakness is the desire for women then it will try to fill my heart with it's desire for them. Whatever it is, it will be motivated at it's core to feed ... on what is carnal (see, hear, feel, touch, taste). This might include any number of things that would, in a non Christ following context, be labeled under the category of "fun". Nothing against fun by the way, it's just a poor reason to get up in the morning when compared to the riches of knowing Christ. That however is another subject entirely.

But now I know it's weakness; it can not be denied. It can not have it's appetite dispossessed. This is where fasting comes in. Food, is such a basic desire of human nature. If you take it away from the sinful nature the body will live much longer than the sinful nature can stand. Even after a day or two that dark inner personae can 'start' to deflate. And forget it, if you have the regular habit of fasting one day a week, that dark symbiont will have no desire to hang out in a body that isn't devoted to listen, taste, and touch; everything that it wants.

By and large in my life I have always had more food than I needed. Even by the standards given by many nutrition charts that I've examined over and over again in my life. And so often I'm not eating to feed my body. If I am honest I realize that I am eating to feed my desire. Jesus set an example for us of denying ourselves of what the body desires Mark 8:34-35. We are called to do the same Gal 5:24. "If you fast" was never a question for the 1st century believers, it was a question of 'when' you fast Mat 6:16–18. And spiritual food from the father is more important than physical food for the body. Jn 4:32

Deleted Off the Pastor's Friend's List

2009-11-06T17:48:00.001+08:00

Wow ... I just got deleted off of the friend's list of a previous pastor; or should I rather say 'my' previous pastor. wow. .... All I did was send him an email asking him a few questions. Questions that are so honest that I've even posted them here on my blog so that others can see.

I changed the name below because I'm not interested in slandering the guy. And although there is a 'part' of me that wants to "bring him out", I realize that I don't have to bring anyone out. That God is fully capable of bringing things to light if 'he' desire it. And God isn't interested in being impatient with anyone; in this life God has taught me that He takes his time because he wants everyone to "turn around" from their own ways and give in into His ways. Thank God He 'has' given me His patience.

Timothy L. Gott November 4 at 9:50am
One of the things that I like about Facebook is the open forum, a sort of a group discussion where everyone is able to learn and grow from each other.

I checked for the comment that I made on your profile and it is gone. ... That actually hurt a little bit because I put a lot of thought and effort in my comment and thought it was valuable. There is always the possibility that there was some sort of Facebook glitch or you deleted it on accident, or perhaps I'm looking for my comment in the wrong place.

However the likelihood of the former seems a little less than the likelihood that you intentionally deleted my comment. If that is true, would you have "deleted" my comment during a small group?

Pastor G. November 4 at 7:13pm
Tim, don't take it personally. I use facebook to just communicate a simple, friendly, positive message...like God wants to bless you. I don't have the time to debate through multiple comment exchanges. If someone honestly doesn't know where I'm coming from and asks a question is one thing. But someone like you, who is a theologian and is just wanting to wrangle about the prosperity message...that's not what I use FB for...sorry. Again, I'm keeping it simple and delete "counterpoint" messages like this frequently. I'm not interested in this forum for that. Thanks for understanding.

Timothy L. Gott November 4 at 7:48pm
What do you mean by theologian ... I'm not even in the possession of a business degree let alone a doctorate in theology :-)

I'll let this sit and digest this for a little while. ... My wife just got home and I should get her to sleep early tonight (there's twelve hours difference here).

Thank you for taking the time out for a thoughtful reply to my email. Have a good night ... well night for me day for you :-) ... take care and do God's stuff !

Pastor G. November 4 at 7:58pm
cool

Timothy L. Gott November 5 at 8:57am
> I use facebook to just communicate a simple, friendly, positive message...like God wants to bless you. I don't have the time to debate through multiple comment exchanges.

Do you often have people that are interested in debating through multiple comment exchanges? If you do then that might explain why you might have thought that was my intention. As far as debates go, I picture a "debate" being something where there are several exchanges back in forth where no one benefits.

Though I am eager to learn and to help others to learn, I can't think of a single time over the last several months that I have responded more than twice in any facebook exchange. I figure one response to "put my thoughts out there", and a second response might be needed to add clarification. However after that I don't think a multiple goings back and forth would be edifying for anyone. In everything I pray that God will lead me by His Spirit.

My intention relates to this Facebook medium. I'm hoping for a 'group' discussion where everyone learns from each other; sort of a virtual smallgroup ... I'm certainly no theologian. That is as long as the definition of a theologian hasn't been reduced to what the Bereans did (the whole daily examination of scriptures thing),.

Before God gave me faith I used to use the sentiment of others "not taking things personally" quite often. I used to use this management technique as a buffer between myself and the statewide organization that I was running. Specifically as a buffer between the rules that I had set and the people that were affected by them. It was a way of emotionally detaching myself from the way that others were affected by those rules so I could focus on what I thought was best for the organization.

God changed that when I realized what he has done for me. He gave his 'Son' for me. He has loved me so much and there is 'no' buffer between him and me. He 'is' affected by the way that I feel; and even as I write these words I can't help but be affected by the way He feels. Yes, I love him because he loved me first. He has taught me by his example that there is no exchange too little or too great for me to address with as much time or as little time as He would lead me to use to address it. To the world and it's "time management" philosophies, this is foolishness; but God is my "Executive Director". He has laid out where and how my time should be used and I will submit to Him as best as I can get this sinful nature of mine to do so.

As far as "a lot of back and forth" goes you don't have to be too concerned about that. If you reply to the above (in whatever way God leads you) then I am appreciative of that. If the Spirit leads you to not reply at all, then I am appreciative of that. However if you or anyone says that they are my brother in the faith and they come up with their 'own' ideas about how they should manage 'their' time (as if that time really belonged to themselves) then I am here to correct them if it is the Spirit of God that leads me to do so. I am even more eager to be corrected. I find so few followers of Christ are willing to be used by the Spirit to that however; they're too busy.

Be Blessed!

It's the same thing as Video City

2009-11-03T18:11:00.000+08:00

One of the teens made an interesting comment to me this morning; a line of thought that I had not considered. "Downloading pirated movies again I see.". My comment didn't have a chance to even lose it's moment before she replied "It's the same thing as Video City.".

I had nothing to say in response to that. I had nothing to say because I had two lines of thought and I didn't know which one, if either, would be of any benefit at that moment. "Wow" I thought to myself, "if this teen really did think that Video City was renting pirated movies than that shows that this teen's conscience has no problem with watching stolen movies from 'any' source as long as they can watch the movies. This just confirms how little this teen must know about what Jesus and the apostles taught about the seriousness of what we do against God's will ... in consideration of Heb 10:26-27 ... What someone wants to watch is another story.

Now there are 'some' debatable issue in life ( Rom 14:1 ) which we should not go back and forth about. If anyone doesn't think that taking something "for free", without the permission of the owners, which others are selling in stores isn't stealing; then well there isn't much for me to debate. It might be helpful for me to understand 'why' they don't think that is stealing though. Usually those that are doing this like to bring up issues of how much the owners are charging for the product or how they can't afford it. How would either of those points make stealing ok to a God that could give us anything anything He wants to give us. I think if God doesn't give us enough to have more than food and clothing, than He must in his divine wisdom know that we don't need those things.

And as for the point about Video City having pirated videos, well there is no way I could know that for sure, just as it would be so hard to be sure if 'any' DVD or SVCD were pirated. All I can say is that this news article and also this report I read and the licensing information that I looked at, make it difficult to believe that the Video SVCDs are of the pirated variety. Yes, it's still possible. But just quite unlikely.

I think that, as a God that searches the heart, that God is looking for those that are 'so' affected by what they know was done for them through the sacrifice of his Son, that they will do everything they can to fight their inner self gratifying natures. Does this mean we will be perfect, no. But each of us can answer the question ourselves as to whether we are doing 'everything' to fight that inner self seeking nature for the sake of Christ. Am I fighting that nature at all?; are you?

What Would a Follower of Christ Watch?

2009-10-30T14:34:00.001+08:00

First off I'd like to address the title of this journal entry. In very few ways to I believe that I have truly addressed the topic of "What Would a Follower of Christ Watch?". I believe to address it as if there could be some sort of "do and do not" watch list, would be to reduce God to something stagnant and written. What should and should not be watched is much more personal than I could possibly address below. It has to do with the relationship that each of us might have with the God that gave Jesus for the sacrifice of our sins. Without further ado however, I present the below.

I had originally started to put this together for a movie night for a group of teens. They wanted me to get this movie list to them a lot quicker than this. However with such a short time left I know that they will not be able to use my recommendations now. So, my primary purpose for composing this is more for reflection and prayer. Most of them will not get to see this until 'after' the JCF get together.

JCF Movie List

The following movies were put together by the JCF. As I looked over the list and thought of the titles of the movies, I wondered what each of them "stood for". I didn't know the answer to the question however. I also didn't know whether Christ was in front of every decision that each of them made when selecting the movies.

In other words did each of them ask theirself "In reflecting on how much God loves me and the life that Jesus has given for me, what kind of things does God want me to listen to and watch? What kinds of things does God want me to be exposed to so I will become the kind of son or daughter that God wants me to be.". Check out this resource.

How to use the review below

You can click on each of the movie title names in order to see a review that I looked at. Remember, just

Facing the Giants

I think this movie looks pretty good. Though I do think the sentiment described in this link is something that should be considered while watching it. Oh, and here is the quote from the previous link "Troubled by it: This response comes, surprisingly enough, from Christians who feel the message of the film is that no matter how bad your problems are, if you turn them over to God, every single problem will come out with the happy ending for which you pray. You'll get a raise. Someone will replace your old car. Your team will win. Your infertile marriage will be blessed with (multiple) children. Get a grip, they say. God doesn't work this way."

High School Musical (HSM 3)

From what I read about it I like it.

Twilight

I didn't think the violence and sensuality were things that any of us (including myself) needed to fill ourselves up with.

Looks like Fun

Hannah Montana (The movie)

Not crazy about this movie because of the "worldy" things that it teaches us to admire. I haven't seen this movie, I've only looked at the reviews so I could be wrong. But if I ever watch a movie and I see people get excited because someone has the "cool stuff" or the "cool life" then I immediately think to myself that Jesus and his disciples were the only ones that had the 'real' cool life.

Kimmy Dora

My first impression of this movie was that it was funny and relatively harmless. I'll spare the reader of some of my more personal convictions regarding the life we should live motivated by Christ. I'll leave those for another time.

YaYa & Angelina

I think in "modern society" that are a lot of things that we find amusing that God (in His wisdom) does not want us to find amusing. And if we have the heart of God, if we love the same things that He loves and hate the same things that He hates, then rebellion will be one of these things. In Rom 1:30-32 we can read how those that are insolent and/or disobey their parents are on equal terms with those that are faithless, heartless, and ruthless. ... Do we show that we approve of these kinds of things by our laughter?

Clover Field

In the first review that I saw I didn't see anything in the description that seemed too far off base. However I heard Gilbeys mention that there was too much gore in this movie. And since I hadn't watched it I decided I would trust Gilbeys' assessment on this. Better to lean on the side of caution. But then I saw this review and a youtube video. And I have to say that the intensity of this film is something that I personally don't want lurking around in my heart. "Above all else, guard your heart,for it is the wellspring of life." - Proverbs 4:23

Death Note 1,2,3

This is a movie about a deranged serial killer and how he tries to take over the world. Is there anything admirable there? "...whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." - Philippians 4:8

I am Legend

Hopefully I'll have time to flesh my thoughts out on this one some day. But in short there are a couple of scenes in here that are just a bit too intense and graphic (I don't even want them "in my head"). If I had an entire day to import the movie into a fast multimedia editing computer I could take out the parts and the story would be completely in tact.

My First Romance
I will have to review this later.

The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants

One of the excerpts that I read of this movie said "Bridget, the soccer player, does manage to seduce the coach, and though he resists at first, finally gives in to his sexy, young pursuer. Afterwards, though, Bridget is devastated and depressed, and she tells her friends that premarital sex left her feeling incomplete, rather than healed." This is actually one of the problems of movies that are marketed as wholesome or even worse marketed as "christian". The idea of avoiding premarital sex 'because' it leaves you feeling incomplete is totally not something that Christ taught. ... If the motivation for living a Godly life isn't 'because' you understand the love that God has given you by the pouring out of the life of his son Jesus, then it is 'not' "Christian".

Resources you can use in the future
*to help you decide what movies you can both enjoy and 'should' watch.

http://www.crosswalk.com/movies/

http://www.crosswalk.com/movies/archives/

http://blog.beliefnet.com/moviemom/

http://www.christiancolleges.com/blog/2009/100-all-time-best-movies-for-christians/

http://www.christiankindred.com/2009/06/how-does-a-christian-decide-which-movies-to-watch/

http://www.beliefnet.com/Entertainment/Movies/2008/09/Top-20-Inspirational-Sports-Movies.aspx

Be a Part of 'Our' Ministry

2009-10-21T07:24:00.001+08:00

Gratefully God is not phased by TD Jakes pride or arrogance. One of the best things that TD Jakes does is he gives the credit (Glory) to God. But one of the worst things that he does is hail how great his 'own' ministry is and sell the idea that others should become a part of 'that' ministry. It's not 'that' ministry (his) that anyone should ask others to become a part of. It's not even the words "I want you to share in this ministry of God" that should ever be said out of someone's mouth. With the subtle underlying message always going back to whatever 'small' 'insignificant' part that each of us play (including me).

God's kingdom is 'so' much bigger than the small part that each of us play. Even if (with worldly eyes) we see millions of people being a part of it and are fooled into believing that it's size is large. ... Large compared to what; God? And I'm not saying that I have never done this myself. It has been rare, but yes I have. And I'm not saying that TD Jakes is alone in this arrogance and pride. Benny Hinn, Creflo Dollar, Joel Osteen, Oral Roberts, Pat Robertson, pick any biggy or smally. The size of your worldly ministry doesn't make you immune to this.

We are all evil. It's important not to dismiss it, sweep it under the table, or to simply say we're forgiven by Christ and we don't have to think about our failings or sins anymore. Recognize and admit your own sin (me too) and God is faithful and will forgive you. Check out http://tinyurl.com/gottesteem for more on the "we are evil" part.

Ghosts! - Do They Exist

2009-10-20T18:36:00.001+08:00

Lately the topic of Ghosts has been pretty heavy. I think partially because of the time of the year, and partially because of the upcoming family series. I'm not sure how much value there is in this. I recently heard a couple of real life ghost stories. And thought I've never scene a ghost in my life, at least I don't think that I have, I 'do' believe them. But I am simply not fascinated with them anymore. Not like I used to be before God gave me wisdom in the faith that He has given me.

Being over fascinated with the idea of ghosts is of no value. Prayers "of protection" against ghosts, being overly concerned with them, are also all of no value. After all, there is no place in the scriptures (as I can recall at the moment) that teach us pray for protection against anyone or anything. I have so many favorite scriptures; however regarding "ghosts" Philippians 4:8 comes to mind. Is there anything good, noble, pure, or right in spending our mind's time on the topic of ghosts? The only thing valuable I can consider regarding this topic is spending the time teaching others how invaluable it is to fill up one's time with the idea of Ghosts.

Yes ghosts exist. Yes it is 'very' likely if you hear someone saying that they saw one that it is probably true. "Why is it there?", "What is it trying to communicate?", "Is it the spirit of someone that you once knew?"; all useless and valueless questions. Let me share with you some useful and valuable questions; "What does Jesus the Christ want for my life today?", "How can I draw closer to God?", "What does is God trying to communicate to me today?".

You see, if it doesn't advance the kingdom of God then there is no value in it. If I saw one, yes it I would probably be distracted; but just for a moment. Because after that moment of weakness I would then recall the hundreds of hours I have spent in scripture and the wisdom that God has given me on what He really has planned for our lives. Remember the scriptures are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus - 2 Tim 3:14-15

The Laundry Woman's Husband

2009-10-15T09:56:00.002+08:00

Just got information about our laundry woman's husband. She showed up here in tears just a couple of hours ago when I was not here.

One of the problems after the flood is so many people with previous problems (like diabetes) have had wounds that were infected by the dirty standing water as they attempted to save items from their homes and/or clean their homes. Her husband's wound on his leg has become 'so' infected that it is already purple now all the way up to the knee.

They may need to amputate later, but for now he needs a shot that will ease the infection and the pain. Our laundry woman is only asking that she can borrow the money. That she will work it off later. But for now her husband is in urgent need.God has given us enough to help with this but it is still hard. I think about the money that I have set aside for the purpose of helping others according to God's will; but then I also think about money that we were saving for other medical and education "needs" of the family and how that is going down faster than it is going up.

Like most people I have this part of me that wants to believe that it is money that I need in order to provide for what my family needs. The part of me that is unfaithful to God's promises wants to trust that the money we have set aside is what I will find my security in. However, just as my phrases ablove alludes to, I know that instead I need to trust in God.

Though there is an unfaithful part of me that wants to say trusting in what God has given me is the same thing as trusting in God; I know better. I know that "trust" is intricately bound to the very essence of "love". So, if I trust in what God has provided me (and my mind is on the wealth that He provided me) then what I am actually trusting in is the wealth itself; as if God was only able to work through money. Though there is nothing wrong with money, the 'love' of the stuff is the root of all things that separate us from God.

God has given us the opportunity to give. And moreso I need to remember that He loved me so much through His son to give us life eternal. That was a very hight cost that was paid. And it's not this world that we are taught by Him to invest in. It is the kingdom that will be prepared for all those that believe.

Which Version of the Scripture should I Use

2009-10-12T14:29:00.002+08:00

In regard to the very old argument about which English version of the scripture is better I won't deny that KJV & the ASV and a few others are closer to the more literal meaning given to us in the Greek and Hebrew. But what I am suggesting is that to get into a heated divisive debate about how one translation is better than another, you can instead say what can I do to care about this person who says they are my brother or sister in Christ; who admit that Jesus is the Christ the Son of God and who was risen on the third day from death to life.

In the new testament you can read in Acts 16 and other chapter how brothers were already debating about issues even as unimportant as circumcision. Those who were the spiritual leaders, apostles and teachers at the time knew that these issues were of less importance than issues of how Jesus was the Christ the Son of God. 1 John 4:1-3 ... so, just in one example in Acts 16 the spiritual leaders decide to submit to this lesser important matter of circumcision just so it would not be a "stumbling block" to their delivering the more important message of Christ crucified for the forgiveness of sins.

What Cause Should We Support?

2009-10-12T10:34:00.002+08:00

There are a lot of things in this world that are "wrong". And a lot of people that have problems which "need to be solved". If we as individuals chase after each one that we think are worthy of our time and attention then we will do little more than wear ourselves out and help them little (if at all). God is a whole lot smarter than us. If we can learn to listen to that quiet voice that comes from Him, we can direct our individual efforts where they can make the most difference.

God knows much more than we do; what the most important things are. If there is the one that 'God' is leading you to be a part of, then do it with all of the effort and strength that He is able to give you. He deservedly gets the credit for everything that has been corrected and/or what He has given us the strength and inspiration to correct. And we deservedly get the credit for everything that we've messed up.

How Can There Be A God If

2009-10-02T09:41:00.003+08:00

I think mothers and fathers look at the pain that their children go through a little differently. I think, in general, mothers would do anything so that their children would not have to experience pain. Father's on the other hand, with varying philosophies, believe that certain amounts of pain and hardships are good for their children and prepare their children for future hardships that they might have to endure in life.

Consider for a moment the many scriptures that speak of our faith being refined the same way that fine metals are refined (through intense heat) ... 1 Peter 1:6-9 is one of them. Intense heat is 'not' comfortable! :-) Now consider a God whose long term objective is 'not' our comfort in this world (though He does often comfort us), but rather a goal of the eternal salvation of our souls.

If we allow the tragedies in life to turn our hearts toward God then what we call tragedies have not been wasted. Look to the long term objectives and promises ... 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Citizenship

2009-09-30T08:03:00.003+08:00

If we are defined by one thing then we have focus, if we define ourselves by more than one thing then we do so with the detriment of being divided regarding some decision that we must make either now or in the future. We try to condone our self serving natures (me too) by self imposing a tier-system of one thing being more important than another.

I think about the examples we see in the New Testament scriptures. I have never read any disciple in scripture taking pride in their country or their citizenship. There were ones that admitted their worldly citizenship (for instance Paul as a Roman citizen) but only when it allowed an opportunity for God's will of sharing the gospel with the Roman officials).

As for myself I am only a U.S. citizen according to the paperwork of the U.S. and the governmental rules of this world. In my heart and mind however I can borrow the words of a favorite praise and worship song; "This world is not my home, I'm just passing through" ... Galatians 3:28

YOU Help the Poor !

2009-09-30T07:37:00.001+08:00

The greatest benefit of serving those that are in need is that it will bring you toward a greater opportunity for a relationship with God.

James 1:27, Acts 9:36, Acts 10.

Notice how God not only 'says' that "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and .. is ...to look after orphans and widows in their distress"; but he also shows us in other scriptures how 'He' has reached out to those who have reached out to those who are in need.

Also consider Matthew 10:42 and Mark 9:41.

In mind of those last two, notice that it does 'NOT' say "anyone who gives money to an organization and has that organization give a cup of water in my name" ... Instead it speaks to the individual doing it.

When was the last time that 'you' gave to those that needed food and/or clothing. Jesus gave us an example to follow. His command is that 'you' follow that example. So, either you need to follow it or stop dirtying His name by not following it but still calling yourself a Christian. ... ME TOO!

Windows One thru Twenty-Nine Please

2009-09-11T10:59:00.001+08:00

I was very "pressed upon" and tired yesterday, but today I feel surprisingly well. Don't get me wrong; my feet still hurt, my toe on my right foot feel like it's bruised, and I'd happily take on about three more hours of sleep if I didn't have so many other things that I believe I should attend to. Yes yesterday was quite a day.

Got there a little after ten AM. First I went to window one and was told by someone in line that I should go to window three to complete my "previously approved" 12(a) visa. At window three I was told that I needed to have my tourists visa extended by one month. But before I go to window twelve I needed to make two copies of several of my documents. Ok at window twelve I was told I needed to go to window fourteen, who politely explained to me that I needed to go back to window three to get something called an "Agenda".

Back at window three and he showed me that the document which I already possessed was signed by the director and so I didn't need an Agenda. Knowing about beurocracy at it's best I requested that he write a very short note that I could give to the guy at window fourteen so Mr. Window Fourteen wouldn't think that I simply didn't know what I was talking about. Mr. Three didn't seem to want to give this to me however. So after I did my best three to four minutes of unsucceful persuasion I finally just got his name (MacDave) and accepted another printed document that was different than what I had but wasn't what Mr. Fourteen was asking for.

After taking this to Mr. Fourteen he looked at what I got from Mr. Three with an expression of "This isn't what I asked for". After a few seconds of that he seemed to come up with a way that he could make this do and gave me some paperwork to fill out. After filling out the paperwork I went back to Mr. Fourteen who promptly sent me to window sixteen to pay for my one month visa extention. This was about P3,100 (but I don't have the receipt in front of me right now). Going back to Mr. Fourteen with the receipt I was told I can pick up my passport and visa later at 1:30pm (a bit more than an hour and a forty five minutes). So I walked to Manila SM to run some other errands.

1:33pm I went to window sixteen to pick up my visa. Now back to Mr. Three and was given another form to fill out and the task of getting two copies of a handful of other documents. Now back at window three who tells me to go to window six to pay (another P5,300) and then back to window three. Mr. Three then tells me at 3:45pm that I can pick up my passport and this new visa at window one. Ahrighty another hour and a half to do something, back to SM Manila (which is a brisk ten minute walk by the way).

Three forty-five PM; your friendly neighborhood "Hey Joe" (as they call all Americans) makes his way back to window one and waits there for ten minutes for his turn. After getting to window one I am told to wait while the clerk goes to the back and gets something that has nothing to do with me and then comes back. My visa (and various paper work) is on the top but I am asked for P8 and the task of making two more copies of several documents and then to come back to window one. After waiting in a short line for the copier (pleasant surprise) I come back to window one and am told that I am not done yet (what?!?).

Ok, now at window number twenty four where I am give another document to fill out and the task of going to the other side of the building to get two copies of seven different documents. I come back to window twenty four a few minutes later and am told that I missed one. So I go back to the copier and come back to window twenty-four with what I think is everything however Mrs. Twenty-Four says that I have the wrong copy of the visa page of my passport. Now back to the copier to get this corrected and then back to Mrs. Twenty-Four.

Everything is completed so I take a finger print card to a make-shift finger print station behind me where I wait for five minutes before going back to Mrs. Twenty-Four who points at two chatty women sitting down about six feet from the station. I just thought they were there just like me, neither one of them said "How may I help you" when I was standing right beside the finger print station for five minutes.

After the finger printing is done I go back to Mrs. Twenty-Four and she tell me that I should go to Window twenty-six to pay an additional fee. Oh no!; when I started this fiasco I had printed out a page from the Phil Immigration website that said my total fees would be P5100. So like a good little Boy Scout I thought I would double that amount just so I could be prepared. Well that wasn't quite enough and at this point I was P700 short; where would I get this money?

With a smile Mrs. Twenty-Four said "oh no, you'll just have to come back tomorrow. We will be open at 9am.". Well I smiled back politely and said "ok well I'll just come back tomorrow then". But that's not what I was thinking. I was trying to figure out how I could get out of this situation without having to make the nearly two hour trip back to Marikina only to do this again tomorrow.

I thought of the lawyer that helped us with this process in the beginning. So I went up to the forth floor to his office and talked the matter over with him. After I was somewhat convinced that I wasn't being treated unduly in this matter, I remembered that I had P1000 in my BPI account. So I went down to Mrs. Twenty-Four and asked if there was a BPI ATM near by and if I had the time to go to it. "It's just over there but you'll need to hurry; it's 4:30pm already.".

Ok so I hurry about fifty meters to the ATM and then hurry back; pesos in hand. Mrs. Twenty-Four reorganizes my paperwork and sends me to window twenty-six to pay P2991. The middle age woman at window twenty-six was about the most disinterested and slow employee I've ever come across. I waited there patiently for a very full five minutes before she ever got to me. She simply sorted and organized the other work that she had there, not once making eye contact with me. My paperwork simply hung there over the edge of her side of the window (I wanted to make sure that she knew I was there). And once every ninety seconds (about) I would shift my paperwork in front of her. Again with absolutely no eye contact I had no idea that she even knew I was there.

Paid the P2991 and then was told to proceed to window twenty-nine where I would have a picture taken for my new iCard and my contact and identifying information was inputted into a computer. The only piece that was incorrect was my age. It said 39 (I'm only 38) but it had my birth date correct of course but the age was still wrong. The explaination?; "The computer calculates age based on year". They apparently had no way to correct this. And finally, about seven hours after I got there, I was given a telephone number to call to find out the status of my iCard tomorrow. But no one knew (I asked three of the people involved) whether the card would be ready when I called or whether it would take two days, three days, one week or three weeks .

Am I unhappy about this situation? Well no, was just tired and felt that my patience was quite tried. But as the old saying goes, "What doesn't kill us makes us stronger"; or the scripture says "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

There area lot of details to this story (like the cost of everything) that I have left out. I spent nearly P12,000 yesterday and hopefully I'll collect the receipts from upstairs and add those details another time as I think it will be useful for others in in the same situation.

Sin is Fun !

2009-08-27T14:36:00.001+08:00

I wish I could write a whole book on this subject but I just don't have the talent/time. The talent that I have for writing is more suited for short entries into a blog (which I do) but not for the content of an entire book. To do so would require that I live like a hermit completely uninterrupted for three to five years. And since I have a family and I am not independently wealthy, that is simply not going to ever happen. I've only heard one speaker dare to say this (a few years ago). As I searched across the internet it seems that the religious right only wants to talk about how sin is 'not' fun and all of that "wages of sin is death" stuff which has nothing to do with whether or not sin is actually fun.

I mean, how can anyone deny it? When I was "out there" doing whatever I wanted, I did enjoy it. How could I not; I was out there doing whatever I wanted with little or no restraint. Sex, women, alcohol, drugs, stealing, lying, pursuing a career that gave me a certain level of respect or power, "getting over" on someone who I considered less intellectually capable than I was; etc. I wouldn't have done any of these things if I had not thought they were not fun. "By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be known as the son of Pharaoh's daughter. He chose to be mistreated along with the people of God rather than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a short time." ... Heb 11:24-25

But I can attest to how short lived this fun is. When I had finished have a night out with a woman, I had to go to work the next day. When I had a few drinks or smoke a little weed with friends at the bar or a one of their houses, the effect of the alcohol or marijuana eventually wore off. When I was young enough to be surrounded by friends who were impressed with my stealing, eventually the thrill and the bragging rights were over. And after I had climbed a few rung up the ladder of power, I eventually realized that even 'my' loose definition of morals and ethics were starting to become strained, and that wasn't any fun.

Yes, the wages of sin is death; something much greater than death in this world. And the fun of doing things that are contrary to what God wants us to do (sin) is certainly temporary; not normally more than just a few hours; or a few days (if you don't count the hours of gaps between "the fun". I'd be lying to you if I didn't say that my heart sometimes longs for the things that I once did several years ago. But then I don't give much attention to my heart "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?" ... Jeremiah 17:11

What I do give regard to is something that doesn't sound too sane for those that don't believe in God and the Spirit of God that Jesus Christ said that he would send. I give regard to a "separate voice" (which is more like a separate thought really). But none-the-less I have truly come to understand that it is actually something completely different than I am because I have dared to follow it's "voice". And although there aren't hundreds of times that I can tell you amazing stories, there are enough amazing stories for me to go 'wow' "I can't ignore that there is something more hear than I can just simply see, hear, touch, and taste.

It's because of this faith that God has given me that I can not deny Christ. I can not ever deny what I have personally experienced. I don't need a bible to tell me that it is true, and I don't need a pastor to tell me what I know for myself.

The Law is Spiritual. But I am Unspiritual

2009-07-29T15:12:00.000+08:00

Pray that I will continue to keep in mind 'today' the great love that Jesus Christ gave so that I might daily be free from the law of sin and death. And that all of our brothers and sisters around the world will struggle relentlessly in the understanding of that great love. I pray that we will all be awake and ready. Fully aware that one of the schemes of the enemy is to rock us asleep while singing the great lullabies that will get us thinking about our jobs, our families, our friends, and our responsibilities. Satan doesn't needs us to think about something vividly evil in order for him to be happy; as long as we don't think about God in this moment, then the devil is happy.

"We know that the Law is spiritual; but I am a creature of the flesh [carnal, unspiritual], having been sold into slavery under [the control of] sin. For I do not understand my own actions [I am baffled, bewildered]. I do not practice or accomplish what I wish, but I do the very thing that I loathe [which my moral instinct condemns].

Now if I do what is contrary to my desire, [that means that] I acknowledge and agree that the Law is good (morally excellent) and that I take sides with it. However, it is no longer I who do the deed, but the sin [principle] which is at home in me and has possession of me. For I know that nothing good dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot perform it. [I have the intention and urge to do what is right, but no power to carry it out.]

For I fail to practice the good deeds I desire to do, but the evil deeds that I do not desire to do are what I am [ever] doing. Now if I do what I do not desire to do, it is no longer I doing it [it is not myself that acts], but the sin [principle] which dwells within me. So I find it to be a law ("rules of right and wrong" acting in my being) that when I want to do what is right and good, evil is ever present with me and I am subject to its insistent demands.

For I endorse and delight in the Law of God in my inmost self [with my new nature]. [Ps. 1:2.] But I discern in my bodily members [in the appetites and wills of the flesh] a different law (rule of action) at war against the law of my mind (my reason) and making me a prisoner to the law of sin that dwells in my bodily organs [in the appetites and wills of the flesh]. O unhappy and pitiable and wretched man that I am! Who will release and deliver me from [the shackles of] this body of death? O thank God! [He will!] through Jesus Christ (the Anointed One) our Lord! So then indeed I, of myself with the mind and heart, serve the Law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin. ... at Romans 7:14-25 AMP

Choosing God's Best revisited

2009-07-24T16:01:00.000+08:00

Once upon a time I wrote a post about "Choosing God's Best" and said that I would like to write more about that later. ... Well, I never got around to writing that 'more' that I was referring to, but I am glad that you were able to write in your blog about it.

I do have a comment about the "High Standards" that you refer to however. I find that there are many people, influenced by the world's view on things, who have created this criteria for a person they are looking for and that criteria gets in the way of God's choosing 'for' us.

Allow God to be the 'full' match maker. Drop the "check-list" and simply tell God make it clear for you whether He wants you to be single or to be married. In that total surrender to His will you will find that He 'is' able to make it clear to you and you don't have to have any criteria other than Him.

Consider in Gen 24 how Abraham allowed God to choose a wife 'for' his son. His son Isaac didn't pick his own wife, and Isaac's wife wasn't even picked by his father. How's that for not having standards. The only "standards" that you might see from this story is the criteria set by Abraham of 'not' getting Issac a wife "from the daughters of the Canaanites".

I think that had to do, if memory is serving me correctly, with a command God had given about the influence that a woman might have in serving the god of other peoples. But notice the criteria that he set had nothing to do with social status or outward appearance.

The reason I mention this, and I do realize I don't know you and I am making an assumption here, is that in the American culture that I am from, the use of the phrase "I have high standards" doesn't usually apply to the idea that someone is looking for a man/woman who has a similar faith. Instead it usually applies to looks, age, social standing, financial stability, or whether or not someone has a vehicle.

Worldy man's perspective; "God wouldn't want me to be with a woman that I'm not attracted to would He?".

Worldy woman's perspective; "God wouldn't want me to be with a man that couldn't provide a good life for me and our family would He?".

Both perspectives are skewed and twisted (custom designed ideological dementia from the father of lies himself). But I'll leave any further ideas that I have about this for another time.

Disney Channel Christianity

2009-07-24T15:52:00.000+08:00

It's good to see that God has given you a faith. I don't yet know what kind of faith it is because I don't know you.

However since God has given me faith in 2003 I have taken seriously the charge; "See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness." ... Heb 3:12-13

And as such I challenge every brother and sister in Christ to not accept the mamby pamby, Leave it to Beaver, Walton's Mountain, Disney Channel christianity that seems to proliferate wildly like some fiendishly inspired disease.

A false Christianity that simply carries over from the "American Dream" that fed the imaginations of millions now repackaged as a form of Christianity pulled loosely from scripture promising health, big houses, "good" jobs, and advanced schooling at a "good" college for all of your children.

"
It's good to see that God has given you a faith. I don't yet know what kind of faith it is because I don't you.

However since God has given me faith in 2003 I have taken seriously the charge; "See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness." ... Heb 3:12-13

And as such I challenge every brother and sister in Christ to not accept the mamby pamby, Leave it to Beaver, Walton's Mountain, Disney Channel christianity that seems to proliferate wildly like some fiendishly inspired disease.

A false Christianity that simply carries over from the "American Dream" that fed the imaginations of millions now repackaged as a form of Christianity pulled loosely from scripture promising health, big houses, "good" jobs, and advanced schooling at a "good" college for all of your children.

"Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you stood your ground in a great contest in the face of suffering. Sometimes you were publicly exposed to insult and persecution; at other times you stood side by side with those who were so treated. You sympathized with those in prison and joyfully accepted the confiscation of your property, because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions.So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.
It's good to see that God has given you a faith. I don't yet know what kind of faith it is because I don't you.

However since God has given me faith in 2003 I have taken seriously the charge; "See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness." ... Heb 3:12-13

And as such I challenge every brother and sister in Christ to not accept the mamby pamby, Leave it to Beaver, Walton's Mountain, Disney Channel christianity that seems to proliferate wildly like some fiendishly inspired disease.

A false Christianity that simply carries over from the "American Dream" that fed the imaginations of millions now repackaged as a form of Christianity pulled loosely from scripture promising health, big houses, "good" jobs, and advanced schooling at a "good" college for all of your children.

"Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you stood your ground in a great contest in the face of suffering. Sometimes you were publicly exposed to insult and persecution; at other times you stood side by side with those who were so treated. You sympathized with those in prison and joyfully accepted the confiscation of your property, because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions.So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. your ground in a great contest in the face of suffering. Sometimes you were publicly exposed to insult and persecution; at other times you stood side by side with those who were so treated. You sympathized with those in prison and joyfully accepted the confiscation of your property, because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions.So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised." ... Hebrews 10:32-36

Pursuing God?

2009-07-24T08:20:00.001+08:00

I thought I was pursuing God because I "went to church" most Sundays, and occasionally on Wednesdays. However when I reflect back on life I consider all of the places I've been & everything I've experienced. I realize that I've spent 40 to 50 hrs/wk pursuing a career, 28 hrs/wk glued to the television &10 hrs a week sitting behind a computer.

I've spent more time trying to entertain myself than sharing the wonder of life that God has given me. I've been to Disney Land, Niagara Falls, Grand Canyon, Yellowstone, and Egypt. I've went to all the greatest places in the world but I didn't spend five minutes a week sharing with someone the wonders God has done in my life. Not even 1% of my time sharing that Jesus Christ gave his life so I could be reunited in a relationship with God. ... If my life's time was a tithe I could not stand before God and say that I really appreciated what He's done for me.

"I pray that you may be active in sharing your faith, so that you will have a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ." ... Philemon verse:6

Benefit of Suffering

2009-07-07T12:39:00.001+08:00

Today I read over a devotional and the accompanying scripture that my wife sent a few days ago. I sensed a leading to read something like this since last night. And as I read it I was thinking about the contrast between the amazing things that the first century believers witnessed and this seemingly simple request that God was making of Ananias. However I appreciate the way this devotional "fleshed out" the things that might have been going through Ananias' head.

Suffering. Down through the centuries it has been God's taming ground for raging bulls. The crucible of pain and hardship is God's schoolroom where Christians learn humility, compassion, character, patience, and grace.

Every time that I read something like this I know how true it is. And I reminded of how much I am lacking. There was a time that I was very very close to being fully obedient to God's will in every moment. But these days I just look and watch. But then I also 'know' ! ... There are still times that I know and do. I can recall times that my wife or someone else will arouse in me something that is a challenge to make a decision.

And during those challenges, I usually make the right decision and do something that would more likely put something on the line for the faith that God has given me. ... This reminds me of a part of one of my favorite books written by C.S. Lewis. In the Screwtape letters in chapter five. It's quite long but I'll place it here in case the resource link is taken offline one day:

MY DEAR WORMWOOD,

It is a little bit disappointing to expect a detailed report on your work and to receive instead such a vague rhapsody as your last letter. You say you are "delirious with joy" because the European humans have started another of their wars. I see very well what has happened to you. You are not delirious; you are only drunk. Reading between the lines in your very unbalanced account of the patient's sleepless night, I can reconstruct your state of mind fairly accurately. For the first time in your career you have tasted that wine which is the reward of all our labours—the anguish and bewilderment of a human soul—and it has gone to your head. I can hardly blame you. I do not expect old heads on young shoulders. Did the patient respond to some of your terror-pictures of the future? Did you work in some good self-pitying glances at the happy past?—some fine thrills in the pit of his stomach, were there? You played your violin prettily did you? Well, well, it's all very natural. But do remember, Wormwood, that duty comes before pleasure. If any present self-indulgence on your part leads to the ultimate loss of the prey, you will be left eternally thirsting for that draught of which you are now so much enjoying your first sip. If, on the other hand, by steady and cool-headed application here and now you can finally secure his soul, he will then be yours forever—a brim-full living chalice of despair and horror and astonishment which you can raise to your lips as often as you please. So do not allow any temporary excitement to distract you from the real business of undermining faith and preventing the formation of virtues. Give me without fail in your next letter a full account of the patient's reactions to the war, so that we can consider whether you are likely to do more good by making him an extreme patriot or an ardent pacifist. There are all sorts of possibilities. In the meantime, I must warn you not to hope too much from a war.

Of course a war is entertaining. The immediate fear and suffering of the humans is a legitimate and pleasing refreshment for our myriads of toiling workers. But what permanent good does it do us unless we make use of it for bringing souls to Our Father Below? When I see the temporal suffering of humans who finally escape us, I feel as if I had been allowed to taste the first course of a rich banquet and then denied the rest. It is worse than not to have tasted it at all. The Enemy, true to His barbarous methods of warfare, allows us to see the short misery of His favourites only to tantalise and torment us—to mock the incessant hunger which, during this present phase of the great conflict, His blockade is admittedly imposing. Let us therefore think rather how to use, than how to enjoy, this European war. For it has certain tendencies inherent in it which are, in themselves, by no means in our favour. We may hope for a good deal of cruelty and unchastity. But, if we are not careful, we shall see thousands turning in this tribulation to the Enemy, while tens of thousands who do not go so far as that will nevertheless have their attention diverted from themselves to values and causes which they believe to be higher than the self. I know that the Enemy disapproves many of these causes. But that is where He is so unfair. He often makes prizes of humans who have given their lives for causes He thinks bad on the monstrously sophistical ground that the humans thought them good and were following the best they knew. Consider too what undesirable deaths occur in wartime. Men are killed in places where they knew they might be killed and to which they go, if they are at all of the Enemy's party, prepared. How much better for us if all humans died in costly nursing homes amid doctors who lie, nurses who lie, friends who lie, as we have trained them, promising life to the dying, encouraging the belief that sickness excuses every indulgence, and even, if our workers know their job, withholding all suggestion of a priest lest it should betray to the sick man his true condition! And how disastrous for us is the continual remembrance of death which war enforces. One of our best weapons, contented worldliness, is rendered useless. In wartime not even a human can believe that he is going to live forever.

I know that Scabtree and others have seen in wars a great opportunity for attacks on faith, but I think that view was exaggerated. The Enemy's human partisans have all been plainly told by Him that suffering is an essential part of what He calls Redemption; so that a faith which is destroyed by a war or a pestilence cannot really have been worth the trouble of destroying. I am speaking now of diffused suffering over a long period such as the war will produce. Of course, at the precise moment of terror, bereavement, or physical pain, you may catch your man when his reason is temporarily suspended. But even then, if he applies to Enemy headquarters, I have found that the post is nearly always defended,

Your affectionate uncle

SCREWTAPE

As you most likely have already concluded, this is a book of many fictitious letters from an older (mentor) demon to a younger one. In this particular letter the elder demon is scolding the younger one of doing things that would inadvertantly awaken the human prey that the younger demon has been assigned to. ... This is what I mean by what I said earlier. I find myself often not doing God's will until something challenges me or awakens me and in that moment I will do what I should have always done every day.

But this "problem" with me is the result of my own disobedience as well. Because I do believe that if I lived the life that God has called me to that I would be in a lot more situations that would seem perilous to me or require me to rely on 'Him'. I could say much more about this but I am sure you already get my point.

"Each painful, awful ordeal brought him to his knees, turning him into a deeper man of grace, humbly committed to following his Savior's lead. What have you "suffered for the name of Christ?

Yep, that's the question that I ask myself often. What today (or even this week) have I suffered for the name of Christ?

Letting Scripture Interpret itself

2009-06-25T16:10:00.001+08:00

From time to time I hear someone tell me that the bible is up for interpretation. What they refer to as the bible is something that I more literally refer to as scripture. I do this because I think that it is important to let the scriptures interpret themselves. Very similarly to the way a specialist takes an unknown language and then begins to compare the symbols with each other until he eventually find meaning in the previously unknown symbols.

Someone more familiar with this idea than myself listed this idea in these terms --> The text of Scripture must be interpreted by historical exegesis, taking an account of its literary forms and devices, letting Scripture interpret Scripture and not relying on the knowledge of man. The reason we should let the Scripture interpret itself is because the bible always tells the truth concerning everything it talks about, but man continually makes errors. If man interprets the bible then the interpretation is open to error, but if the bible interprets the bible, it will always be completely true. This is why the exegesis of passages is important, so that we know what the scripture is actually saying, contrary to what we think it is saying.

It's usually the people that have something they don't want to give up that like to adopt the idea that the scripture is up to interpretation. Of course if they ever accept the idea of letting the scriptures interpret themselves then they'll probably resort to some other form of poking holes in the idea. They would rather do that than think that they themselves are not living up to a mark that they believe is true. "The mark" obviously has to change, because they certainly are not going to change :-)

Angels (in the scriptures)

2009-03-30T14:01:00.001+08:00

Just wrote this article today because I was encourage by a thought that God gave me when my fiance' made a comment about me being "an angel".

Although I knew she was using a "figure of speech" the comment reminded me of a very encouraging idea that is spoken about in the scriptures.

"Are they not all ministering spirits, sent out to render service for the sake of those who will inherit salvation?" Heb 1:14 ... And in the context of that scripture in Heb 1:14 I also starting looking at the 'other things' that angels are listed as in the scriptures.

My friend Daniel started teaching me about the Greek words that represented "angel" a few months ago. And I've always wanted to visit this topic again since then. I was able to find the following information in a couple of good references. My references by the way are an article at Belief.net and another article at Catholic.org .

What are angels? An angel is a pure spirit created by God. The Old Testament theology included the belief in angels: the name applied to certain spiritual beings or intelligences of heavenly residence, employed by God as the ministers of His will.

The English word "angel" comes from the Greek angelos, which means 'messenger'. In the Old Testament, with two exceptions, the Hebrew word for "angel" is malak, also meaning 'messenger'. The prophet Malachi took his name from this word. He was himself a messenger, and he prophesied about the coming of "the messenger of the covenant", Jesus Christ (Malachi 3:1).

Although the word "angel" in the Bible, meaning a messenger, nearly always applies to heavenly beings, it can occasionally apply to human messengers. Malachi himself said a priest was a messenger (malak) of the LORD of hosts (Malachi 2:7), and in the Book of Revelation the elders of the seven churches of Asia were called angels (1:20; 2:1 etc.). But when we meet messengers doing supernatural things, there is no doubt they are heavenly beings - God's messengers, working for Him and for the ultimate benefit of mankind.

And by the way is was this article that got me going on this research in the first place. All of this was very encouraging to think that such amazing creatures, so intimate in their workings with God, have been sent to be spirits that "minister" to us that have been selected to inherit salvation.

It's Good to Ask

2009-03-27T08:59:00.000+08:00

It is good that our family is going through things that require us to ask for help. "Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it." - Luke 18:17 ... Think about it for a moment. Have you ever seen a child that had difficulty asking for help because of their pride and their desire to be self sufficient.

I was originally looking up something else in connection with pride when I found a blog entry about becoming like children. And then I believe that the Unique Person of God (the Holy Spirit) began to teach me as I was reading that scripture above in the context of pride. And I started to think how much I really need to set aside my pride and become more like a little child in so many more ways.

I should start getting to know the children that God has placed in my life and looking at them more. I should start learning from the way that God has made the ones that are closest to me before they lose too much of their innocence. And hopefully before that happens God will have given my wife and I another child that is old enough that I can learn from. Well actually wife to be, just nine more days to marriage.

Overheated

2009-03-26T10:17:00.001+08:00

There are so many things that are happening that are pressing the faith that God has given me. First of all I wasn't planning on getting married so soon, but we both know that God had other things in mind. Before I had plans on getting married I had looked at the money that God had given me and thought to myself "ah ok. If I live frugally it looks like I will have enough money here to live in the Philippines for six months before I really must look for a job. And I already think that God is leading me to start looking for work much sooner than that, maybe a month or two, so it will be quite easy to do this."

But then God put the burden on my heart to get married much sooner according to His timing. So I had to spend a little over half of what I had saved up to buy the ring and pay for what I thought was going to be half of the wedding (but it keeps getting bigger). But I thought to myself, "Well that still leaves me 3 months of provision and I still have my last paycheck and my tax refund that is left. And I also have two hundred in the U.S. that I can send a check to Malu so she can deposit in her dollar account.". But then this hope of provision has also gone away, at least temporarily, because of the fraud that has been occurring on my accounts.

And then lastly I had been thinking; "Ok, maybe instead of directly through me, God will be providing for the remainder of our needs for the wedding through the Honda that will be sold". But then this overheating thing happened today where the water cap must have been placed back on the radiator too loosely and I did not look at the temperature gauge as I should have. So for almost an hour my faith was shaken and I was struggling to keep my desire and hopes upward. It was shaken I believe because I had, once again, been putting my faith in what I could see instead of what I could not see. God has taught me that it is foolish to trust in myself (man). As one scripture puts it "It is better to take refuge in the LORD Than to trust in princes." PS 118:9 . And another one that says "Woe to those who ... trust in chariots because they are many and in horsemen because they are very strong, But they do not look to the Holy One of Israel, nor seek the LORD!" ISAIH 31:1

However as I fought inwardly through this I kept my eyes and my desires "looking up". And though it was a struggle to keep my eyes and my desires looking up, I kept them that way because I knew that was the only real hope that I could have. And as I prayed to God my "heart thoughts" turned to things like "What is God's will here, what is God doing? What can I do to understand what God's plan is here.". And over the next hour I would slowly begin to realize that this was actually an answer to my prayer. I have been praying over and over again that God would help us to see that the most valuable part of what He has given me and the family that will soon be mine is the FAITH in Him and his provision. "In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials,so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ;" I Pe 1:6-7

So I started to feel better. And I knew though it was all so difficult, that everyone still had food and clothing. And even though it would make me feel sad I would still have that joy 2Cor 6:10 in knowing what God has promised is more than anything, even a wedding, that I might get in this world. It was only the provision of food and clothing that God had promised. And that not even my wedding is something that He had promised beyond the provision of those. However I still think that He would see to it that this wedding is beautiful because our desire is, this time, to honor Him in this wedding and not ourselves. We hope to point to all good things coming from Him. Without just assuming this, like so many people like to use as an excuse not to recognize God in everything.

Lastly, just a few minutes ago. I found out that the car was ok. Malu's brother tried the car and it cranked just fine and he said the engine was not any worse than it was before. I was concerned because I had tried the car one time before and it had trouble cranking at that time. However the car must have cut off before there was any real damage that was done. I was going very slowly at the time, and when I noticed the gauge was in the red I stopped the car by placing my foot on the brakes. But when I stopped the car with the brakes, the car then stalled on it's own and the engine halted. So it's good that it must have just got in the red for a very short time. And once again, as God would have it, I had stopped right in front of a home where a woman was outside already. And she was able to help me by fetching a pale of water that I placed in the radiator after the engine had cooled a little.

An Email from my WTB

2009-03-10T13:41:00.001+08:00

Just thought I would share one of the emails that my WTB (Wife-to-Be) just sent me. Just another reminder of who God has chosen for me :-)

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Hi HTB,

Thought I would share this bible study with you. It reminded me of the verse that we were talking about last Sat. after we came from Quiapo – when the parking attendant took advantage of us.

Today, I have decided to keep praise & worship songs and bible study lessons going continuously in an effort to be sensitive to God’s voice, hear Him more, and start living as God wants me to. I was affected by one of the discussion questions in the devotional I was reading: “Imagine for a moment, Jesus would replace your life with His life for one day, with His heart's desire; He would go through your one day routine – wake up on your bed, drive your car or commute through road traffic, talk to your peers, pay your bills, etc. – would people around you see a radical difference in you? Or would there be no difference from what you’ve been doing on a regular day because, Jesus already lives in your heart always?”

Malu

Playing with my Cell Phone

2009-03-09T06:20:00.001+08:00

I'm sitting here "playing with my cell phone" for the last fifteen minutes when I was supposed to be sitting down to write down what was on my heart and what was on my mind. I have so much to do and right now is no exception. But despite everything that I "have to do" I know that God is not blind to what I think that I "need" to get done. An arrogant race of men is what we are. We prove ourselves arrogant as what we actually spend our time on defines for us what is actually the most important to us.

We can say over and over again that God is the most important thing in our lives but what do we speak about the most, what do we write about the most, what do we give to the most in our mind's time. It is so easy to get lost in what 'we' think is important to do. And then fall into the prowling lion's trap of trying to define what we think is important to God. That is to say that we try to do what we think is important and then later attempt to shape that which is important to us into something that is "important" to God.

Here is the truth. There is no way to find out what is important to God unless we talk to God and ask him. Or if we are having trouble "hearing" that gentle voice (1 Kings 19:11-13), then reading the scriptures are useful for teaching us what God wants, how we should live. I keep on saying "we" but of course I am thinking primarily about me this morning. But I also hope that others will benefit from the things that I am struggling with this morning.