The Candidates Chat

March 24; Spring Break

2008-03-24T16:13:00.003-04:00

Going on Spring Break - Too Much Political action led to exhaustion...

We will be back at it soon!

:)

March 14: Cheney "Helps" Bernake

2008-03-14T13:43:00.012-04:00

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11:03 AM EST Friday March 14, 2008

BehindTheCurtain: Mr. Bernake?

FedHead: I am quite busy Mr. Vice President, can this wait?

BehindTheCurtain: What's up?

FedHead: Bear Stearns is nearly bankrupt and we are trying to avoid a stock market crash

BehindTheCurtain: Welcome to my life

FedHead: I don't understand

BehindTheCurtain: I save the world every day...
BehindTheCurtain: Interested in any assistance?

FedHead: O.K. Dr. Evil, I could use some help

BehindTheCurtain: First, I don't appreciate that nickname
BehindTheCurtain: Second, the stock market solution is easy

FedHead: Sorry about the nickname - I'm listening

BehindTheCurtain: You need to inject money into the situation
BehindTheCurtain: Print a LOT of money

FedHead: How much?

BehindTheCurtain: A Milllllllllion Billlllllllion Dollllllllllllars!

FedHead: Isn't that inflationary?

BehindTheCurtain: Totally

FedHead: Well, I have to contain inflation AND hold interest rates

BehindTheCurtain: I see the conflict

FedHead: Under your plan either inflation goes up, up, up or interest rates go up

BehindTheCurtain: Ask yourself, which one doesn't matter?

FedHead: Well, inflation will make matters worse,
FedHead: But homes are not selling despite falling prices and low interest rates

BehindTheCurtain: So,...

FedHead: I raise interest rates to prevent inflation?

BehindTheCurtain: Nobody wants to see Budweiser cost as much as Heineken

FedHead: You drink Heineken?

BehindTheCurtain: No, but voters do

FedHead: I gotcha

BehindTheCurtain: As for Bear Stearns - they had it coming

FedHead: I kinda agree

BehindTheCurtain: I see it like this:
BehindTheCurtain: Bear Stearns is Iraq
BehindTheCurtain: They are screwed, blued and tatooed but there aint crap we can do about it

FedHead: o.k.......

BehindTheCurtain: J.P.Morgan is like Iran
BehindTheCurtain: They hate Iraq but they would take advantage of a situation if they could

FedHead: And buy Bear Stearns?

BehindTheCurtain: Exactly

FedHead: But together that's a bigger, smellier mess, isn't it?

BehindTheCurtain: It's like being in charge of sanitation in Iraq
BehindTheCurtain: You come to work every day and say to yourself: This is a crap job and I just don't know where to start

FedHead: I don't totally follow that but I see when needs to be done

BehindTheCurtain: Print money and bail-out the Bear, BUT stay on top of inflation

FedHead: Got it!

BehindTheCurtain: One thing, Ben...

FedHead: Wat's that?

BehindTheCurtain: If anyone asks, you need to say two things:
BehindTheCurtain: First, this is the "Bush-McCain America Plan"
BehindTheCurtain: Second, Hillary and Obama were not helpful and you had to go forward without them

FedHead: Not a problem
FedHead: Democrats don't understand economics anyway

BehindTheCurtain: Precisely!
BehindTheCurtain: You are starting to really understand
BehindTheCurtain: I will call you my "Little Evil Fed"

FedHead: Not sure I am ready for that, sir

BehindTheCurtain: Then this will be our little secret

FedHead: O.k.

BehindTheCurtain: Call if you need anything else

FedHead: Will-do

BehindTheCurtain: Bye...

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March 13: Dean and Obama Negotiate

2008-03-14T13:28:00.010-04:00

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8:35 PM EST Thursday March 13, 2008

It'sMyParty: Senator?

BigMo4DC: Hi Howard

It'sMyParty: We need to talk about the Michigan and Florida proposals

BigMo4DC: What's there to talk about?

It'sMyParty: We need your feedback on the plan

BigMo4DC: O.K. - any plan Hillary endorses, we are suspicious
BigMo4DC: Do I need to be more specific?

It'sMyParty: C'mon, Barack, I need you to work with me

BigMo4DC: I am supposed to work with you while you are being mitigated behind the scenes by Hillary?

It'sMyParty: Don't you think that's a bit paranoid?

BigMo4DC: WHO is speaking?

It'sMyParty: Knock if off

BigMo4DC: They are working around you not through you and they lie to you every day

It'sMyParty: I am not worried about underhanded stuff like that
It'sMyParty: I run the DNC, what would they do to me?

BigMo4DC: Remember that photo of me in cultural clothes?
BigMo4DC: They wanted America to think I was Muslim

It'sMyParty: What are you getting at?

BigMo4DC: They would do the same thing to you

It'sMyParty: No Way - Never

BigMo4DC: Oh yeah?
BigMo4DC: Well, they are circulating this picture:

It'sMyParty: HOLY EFFING CRAP!

BigMo4DC: Welcome to Reality - enjoy your stay

It'sMyParty: This is horrible!
It'sMyParty: I don't even know Michael Jackson!

BigMo4DC: Uhh,... that's Janet Jackson

It'sMyParty: Sorry - it's really hard to tell them apart these-days

BigMo4DC: Just remember Michael has the better figure
BigMo4DC: And he uses more makeup

It'sMyParty: Oh yeah - right, right right...

BigMo4DC: Anyway, it is clear to you that the Clintons will stop at nothing?

It'sMyParty: That is now QUITE clear

BigMo4DC: O.K. - first, go deal with your picture
BigMo4DC: second, come back with a plan that makes sense in Florida and Michigan

It'sMyParty: Sounds like a plan

BigMo4DC: Good luck

It'sMyParty: You hang in there

BigMo4DC: Story of my life...

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March 12: Al Makes an Inconvenient Request

2008-03-12T14:20:00.008-04:00

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5:21 AM EST Wednesday February 27, 2008

$avingThePlanet: Senator?

BigMo4DC: Good Morning, Al
BigMo4DC: Very nice to hear from you

$avingThePlanet: Great win in Mississippi

BigMo4DC: It's a good feeling

$avingThePlanet: I can imagine

BigMo4DC: A lot of work to do in Pennsylvania
BigMo4DC: And we're waiting for that putz Howard Dean to sort out Michigan and Florida

$avingThePlanet: I really would appreciate it if you didn't use that word around me

BigMo4DC: Putz?

$avingThePlanet: No,... Florida

BigMo4DC: On my gosh, Al - I'm sorry
BigMo4DC: It still stings?

$avingThePlanet: Only when I am awake or breathing

BigMo4DC: Ouch
BigMo4DC: Anyway - what can I do for you?

$avingThePlanet: Well, Kerry and I are on your side

BigMo4DC: Thank you very much, Al
BigMo4DC: Just don't tell me you want a cabinet post or something like Edwards did

$avingThePlanet: He what?

BigMo4DC: He wants to parlay his delegates into a shot at being US Attorney General

$avingThePlanet: That's certainly assumptive and opportunistic...

BigMo4DC: No Kidding.

$avingThePlanet: What did you tell him?

BigMo4DC: I told him he was on the list and chill out for now

$avingThePlanet: Good call
$avingThePlanet: I would never ask for something like that

BigMo4DC: You are above it

$avingThePlanet: I might offer support in exchange for an ambassadorship - but never, ever the prestige of a cabinet post

BigMo4DC: Uh,... what are you getting at?

$avingThePlanet: To be named an ambassador is below radar and not a huge thing to ask

BigMo4DC: Ambassador to where?

$avingThePlanet: The moon

BigMo4DC: Ha - you finally tell a funny joke!

$avingThePlanet: Actually it wasn't a joke

BigMo4DC: You are serious?
BigMo4DC: You want to be ambassador to the moon?

$avingThePlanet: The moon carries mythic and scientific relevance for the people of earth
$avingThePlanet: It remains an under-represented force in our everyday lives
$avingThePlanet: We have visited, but we never returned
$avingThePlanet: How do you think the moon feels about that?

BigMo4DC: I need to lay down and put a cold cloth on my head
BigMo4DC: Then, I am going to call Ted Kennedy

$avingThePlanet: Why call Teddy?

BigMo4DC: It is time for me to start drinking heavily and I need to consult an expert

$avingThePlanet: That's a little extreme, Senator

BigMo4DC: Not from where I sit...

$avingThePlanet: At least think it over

BigMo4DC: Yeah - over a triple Scotch and water

$avingThePlanet: I am going to go now -
$avingThePlanet: You need some contemplation time

BigMo4DC: I think I need more than that

$avingThePlanet: Like what?

BigMo4DC: Like sanity to return to many, many people

$avingThePlanet: You go lay down

BigMo4DC: Bye

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March 11: Edwards Calls To Bemoan

2008-03-12T13:53:00.009-04:00

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11:36 PM EST Wednesday March 11, 2008

Delegates4U: John?

IStillMatter: Hey
IStillMatter: What's up?

Delegates4U: I don't get the whole Spitzer thing

IStillMatter: What part?

Delegates4U: He has a couple rolls in the hay with "work-for-hire staff" and bingo - there goes his whole career

IStillMatter: I think I know what you are thinking
IStillMatter: Bill "Teflon" Clinton banged half of Arkansas and groped the other half

Delegates4U: Damn straight!
Delegates4U: More like Bill "Latex" Clinton

IStillMatter: A lot of people are pissed about this...

Delegates4U: I get hammered for being a plaintiffs trial lawyer
Delegates4U: But an entire law firm could retire on Bill Clinton harassment cases

IStillMatter: Agree

Delegates4U: Hillary made me out to be some monster

IStillMatter: You're too cute to be a monster

Delegates4U: Thanks, but you are NOT helping

IStillMatter: Did you IM me to vent or do you have a question?
IStillMatter: Letterman's Top Ten is coming up and I don't want to miss it

Delegates4U: Record it or download it tomorrow

IStillMatter: Download it?
IStillMatter: How?

Delegates4U: The Internet

IStillMatter: Can't - I'm on bad terms with Gore
IStillMatter: A couple years back Al was going to have someone install it for me

Delegates4U: WHAT?

IStillMatter: We had a petty argument and that was that...

Delegates4U: You have no Internet because you had a spat with Al?!?!?!?

IStillMatter: Yep, it sucks.

Delegates4U: I don't know where to begin... nevermind.
Delegates4U: Then TIVO it

IStillMatter: What's TIVO?
IStillMatter: Isn't he one of the Jackson 5?

Delegates4U: That's TITO you dolt!

IStillMatter: Don't raise your voice
IStillMatter: Anyway, I can't record it - I am out of blank VHS tapes

Delegates4U: Maybe it's best you were not elected President

IStillMatter: WTF?

Delegates4U: The bi-planes you would have sent to Afghanistan would have been shot down

IStillMatter: har, har, har
IStillMatter: Listen, you are getting hostile and I am getting pissed
IStillMatter: Seriously, I don't want to miss the Top Ten

Delegates4U: Unbelievable!

IStillMatter: Really, do you have a question or not?

Delegates4U: I have a helluva lot more than when I started this thread
Delegates4U: But I now have a headache and don't want to even begin...

IStillMatter: COOL!

Delegates4U: What?

IStillMatter: The list is "Top Ten Messages Left On Eliot Spitzer's Answering Machine"

Delegates4U: Why is that cool?

IStillMatter: Whenever it is NOT about me, I am happy

Delegates4U: You have low standards, my friend

IStillMatter: Checkout number 9 "It's Barack Obama. Remember our conversation about being my running mate? Nevermind."
IStillMatter: I still have a chance!

Delegates4U: To be Obama's VP?
Delegates4U: I had no idea you were even interested

IStillMatter: At this point I am up for anything
IStillMatter: Listen, I gotta go - I don't want to miss the rest of the list

Delegates4U: Later...

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March 10: Hannity and Colmes Plan Ahead

2008-03-09T19:44:00.008-04:00

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9:17 AM EST Monday March 10, 2008

I'mRightI'mHannity: Alan?

ColmesFox: Hey Sean

I'mRightI'mHannity: Have you seen the calendar?

ColmesFox: Yeah, I know, I know...
ColmesFox: After Mississippi, we're screwed for election results until April 22nd

I'mRightI'mHannity: Who the heck planned this?

ColmesFox: The political parties did

I'mRightI'mHannity: There ya' go...
I'mRightI'mHannity: What are we gonna do?

ColmesFox: Well,... there is the matter of the Virgin Islands on April 5th

I'mRightI'mHannity: So?

ColmesFox: I have an idea
ColmesFox: We do the show LIVE from the Virgin Islands

I'mRightI'mHannity: C'mon, Alan - Fox would never set-up our whole show in the Virgin Islands for one night of election returns

ColmesFox: You are correct - but that's not my idea

I'mRightI'mHannity: Elaborate for me

ColmesFox: The last of the pundits will rehash the Mississippi results Wednesday
ColmesFox: The viewers will THEN be tortured with hours of daily BS about Super Delegates and Pennsylvania
ColmesFox: Fox will EXPECT US to be part of that!

I'mRightI'mHannity: It's going to be just brutal on our ratings
I'mRightI'mHannity: People will watch Jeopardy instead...
I'mRightI'mHannity: You know, I have always thought Alex Trebeck is a Canadian socialist pig

ColmesFox: Stay with me, Sean

I'mRightI'mHannity: Sorry

ColmesFox: That's why we do something really special

I'mRightI'mHannity: Alan, if it's a good idea, I'm in

ColmesFox: O.k., we go to the Virgin Islands Wednesday and set-up the studio
ColmesFox: Starting Thursday we do the show as a "LIVE Virgin Islands Countdown" every day until the primary on April 5th

I'mRightI'mHannity: What about our Wednesday show?

ColmesFox: Greta can cover for us with one of her random college co-ed disappearance stories

I'mRightI'mHannity: But viewers would be expecting Mississippi election analysis

ColmesFox: Honestly, Sean - what's the difference?

I'mRightI'mHannity: Good point
I'mRightI'mHannity: Let's get back to your plan...

ColmesFox: Right. So, we grab viewer interest with clever teasers
ColmesFox: For example, "The Democratic race is so close, The Virgins could be the difference"
ColmesFox: "Obama vs. Clinton - Who's leading with Virgins?"
ColmesFox: "Who will carry the vote with Billionaire tax-cheat expatriots?"

I'mRightI'mHannity: Alan, this is simply brilliant!

ColmesFox: Can you see Dick Morris in a casual flowers shirt pontificating while sipping a tropical drink with an umbrella in it?

I'mRightI'mHannity: Not only can I picture that - I am getting thirsty myself!

ColmesFox: On top of it, we NEED and DESERVE a vacation

I'mRightI'mHannity: For once I agree with you 100%

ColmesFox: In my book, screwing off for a week should be a non-partisan effort!

I'mRightI'mHannity: Let the countdown begin!

ColmesFox: I have only 1 request...

I'mRightI'mHannity: What is it?

ColmesFox: No O'Reilly

I'mRightI'mHannity: Why?

ColmesFox: We don't want - and don't need - him doing No-Spin-Zone remotes with vacationers on those effing cruise ships

I'mRightI'mHannity: That's a valid concern

ColmesFox: And if Bill shows up, Covuto will want to show up and if Covuto shows up Greta will want to be there and and work-up some weird Aruba - Virgin Islands connection.

I'mRightI'mHannity: Calm down - I gotcha

ColmesFox: The only valid tag-along on our deal is Brit Hume. After all, he IS the Fox political reporter.

I'mRightI'mHannity: Totally agree with you

ColmesFox: I'll call the boss at 9:30 and pitch the concept

I'mRightI'mHannity: I'll call him at 9:45 and back you up

ColmesFox: Perfect!
ColmesFox: Wish me luck!

I'mRightI'mHannity: Good luck buddy!

ColmesFox: Did you just call me "buddy"?

I'mRightI'mHannity: Uhh,... yeah

ColmesFox: I am beginning to think that deep down, you care

I'mRightI'mHannity: I do Alan. We just disagree on some things.

ColmesFox: No argument

I'mRightI'mHannity: Now go close the deal!

ColmesFox: I'm on it!

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March 9: Bill Is Still Bill

2008-03-09T13:31:00.007-04:00

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1:45 PM EST Sunday March 9, 2008

It'sNotOver: Hey Bill?

LoveBubba: Good-job in Wyoming

It'sNotOver: Shut up

LoveBubba: 59,000 Democrat voters in the state and you could have practically called 51% of them yourself.

It'sNotOver: I just love how supportive you are

LoveBubba: And I love how I have been sent to Humidity-Township, Mississippi to speak to nobody

It'sNotOver: Closed topic
It'sNotOver: All of this won't matter after the Super Delegates go our way

LoveBubba: I'm not hearing good things on that front, babe

It'sNotOver: We will win the overall popular vote,
It'sNotOver: We crushed Obama in Ohio and we won TX and CA
It'sNotOver: We WILL FORCE the party to select me

LoveBubba: Maybe so, but Obama will be a problem
LoveBubba: I'm thinking he won't take the VP slot

It'sNotOver: Why the hell not?

LoveBubba: He talks to Gore...
LoveBubba: That can't be good

It'sNotOver: I knew that unappreciative, green blimp would betray us!

LoveBubba: Easy does it, Hilla
LoveBubba: I sorta figured it would happen

It'sNotOver: Why can't everyone just do what we tell them?

LoveBubba: They think for themselves these-days
LoveBubba: And what did you do to upset Oprah?

It'sNotOver: ?

LoveBubba: She is p-i-s-s-e-d

It'sNotOver: Not worried

LoveBubba: Millions of viewers and tons of influence, honey

It'sNotOver: Why can't you look at the bright side?

LoveBubba: I am trying to find one

It'sNotOver: Stop it!

LoveBubba: There is a good thing about campaigning down South

It'sNotOver: What is it?

LoveBubba: Lots of Hooters

It'sNotOver: What?

LoveBubba: It's a restaurant and they are everywhere
LoveBubba: On every corner - like gas stations in big cities

It'sNotOver: Is this where the girls wear orange hot pants
It'sNotOver: AND t-shirts that are 2-sizes too small?

LoveBubba: THAT'S THEM
LoveBubba: Nice family atmosphere

It'sNotOver: Family?

LoveBubba: Well, Dad's and boys - that's a big part of most families, right?

It'sNotOver: UGH!
It'sNotOver: PLEASE do not get photographed in a Hooters!

LoveBubba: I tell you, Southerners must be powered by hot wings and Bud Light

It'sNotOver: I DO NOT like any of this

LoveBubba: The Hooters girls love me
LoveBubba: And they weren't even old enough to vote in 1992

It'sNotOver: Ahem, are they old enough to drive today?

LoveBubba: Good point - I'll have an assistant start pre-secreening

It'sNotOver: Three words: Age-Of-Consent

LoveBubba: Whatever...
LoveBubba: I am like a rock star!

It'sNotOver: I want you back at campaign HQ tomorrow morning

LoveBubba: I'm thinking no

It'sNotOver: If you start a controversy, I will kill you

LoveBubba: Ooooh, there's a headline
LoveBubba: Anyway - I gotta go...
LoveBubba: I have a speech to do before the Atlanta NASCAR race starts

It'sNotOver: Seriously, you need to come back to HQ

LoveBubba: YOU sent me out here and I am finally getting used to it
LoveBubba: So, YOU get back to preparing for Pennsylvania
LoveBubba: I'll be sure the people of Mississippi still love me
LoveBubba: I mean,... vote for you

It'sNotOver: I'm sending a plane to get you

LoveBubba: It's flying back empty, honey
LoveBubba: You need to think green and not waste fuel like that

It'sNotOver: You are dead

LoveBubba: Maybe, but not today
LoveBubba: I gotta go, the National Anthem is in 5 minutes and then the race starts
LoveBubba: I'm starting to really like NASCAR

It'sNotOver: This is my moment and you are threatening to screw it up!

LoveBubba: Later, babe

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March 7: Bush is Confused

2008-03-06T13:04:00.018-05:00

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5:15 AM EST Friday March 7, 2008

I'mTheMan: George?

Bush43: Please, call me George

I'mTheMan: Uh,... Hi George

Bush43: Hello Senator

I'mTheMan: Thanks for the endorsement and media exposure
I'mTheMan: And especially for the wonderful White House visit

Bush43: No sweat!
Bush43: It's nothing compared to what we'll do when you clinch the nomination in Denver

I'mTheMan: Uh,... I already clinched and...
I'mTheMan: the Democrats will be in Denver

Bush43: At the same time?!?!?!
Bush43: Holy crap!
Bush43: Someone is in deep dung for not checkin'!

I'mTheMan: Sir, if I may...

Bush43: Better be quick - I gotta make some phone calls and sort this crap out

I'mTheMan: First, I have already clinched the delegate count

Bush43: That's great John!
Bush43: Why didn't you say something when you were at the White House this week?

I'mTheMan: I thought the visit was to.... uhh, nevermind
I'mTheMan: Second, The Republicans will be in Minneapolis-St.Paul

Bush43: Oh,.. so somebody already figured out the Denver mess?

I'mTheMan: At this point, I am just going to say, "Yes"

Bush43: Good thing!

I'mTheMan: You will be giving a keynote address at the convention

Bush43: I am?

I'mTheMan: Yes - it's an hour-long speech

Bush43: What can I possible talk about for a whole hour?

I'mTheMan: Many people are already asking that question

Bush43: Somebody will write something nice and put it in the scrollie thingee

I'mTheMan: The what?

Bush43: The scrolliee thingee that's in front of me when I talk to crowds or people

I'mTheMan: I believe it's called a teleprompter

Bush43: Whatever, some words will be rollin' and I'll read-em
Bush43: Anyway, exactly which city is the convention in?

I'mTheMan: Excuse me?

Bush43: You said Minneapolis - St. Paul
Bush43: I need to know which one
Bush43: My job is to tell the pilot of Air Force-1

I'mTheMan: You do what?

Bush43: When I get on AF-1, I give the destination to the pilot
Bush43: I write the secret three letter airport code on a sticky note and give it to him
Bush43: Cheney set this procedure up for me

I'mTheMan: Ahhh,.. I think I understand now

I'mTheMan: Anyway, Minneapolis - St. Paul share the same airport

Bush43: Oh Crap! This is a trap!

I'mTheMan: What?

Bush43: It's a trick John, we gotta move the convention!

I'mTheMan: Why?

Bush43: First, according to the CIA, Minnesota is a Democrat state
Bush43: Second, if Minneapolis - St. Paul share an airport...
Bush43: We are gonna get hit-up for a gazillion dollar loan to build another airport so each one has it's own airport.
Bush43: We need to outwit the Democrats by not showin' up

I'mTheMan: Mr. President, as unbelievable it is for me to say this...
I'mTheMan: In my opinion, you are WAY OVER-THINKING the situation

Bush43: Really?
Bush43: I trust your judgement, John

I'mTheMan: I need to go, sir

Bush43: Okee dokee...
Bush43: Keep me posted on the campaign
Bush43: I got a feelin' in my gut that you are going to pull it off

I'mTheMan: Uh,... thank you, Mr. President

Bush43: Later - time to play horseshoes

I'mTheMan: Bye

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March 6: Kerry and Gore Hatch A Plan

2008-03-06T12:57:00.010-05:00

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11:18 AM EST Thursday March 6, 2008

$avingThePlanet: Senator

IStillMatter: Hi Al!

$avingThePlanet: We need to talk

IStillMatter: You get a call from Dean too?

$avingThePlanet: I certainly did

IStillMatter: In my book, he's still insane

$avingThePlanet: I agree - his icecaps are melting

IStillMatter: Ha - very funny

$avingThePlanet: We need to save the party

IStillMatter: Save the planet, save the party - you seen to be always saving something

$avingThePlanet: I also just saved $219 on my car insurance
$avingThePlanet: Heh, heh, heh - a little joke there

IStillMatter: Al, as a friend... don't even try to tell jokes

$avingThePlanet: You're probably right
$avingThePlanet: I hear that a lot, actually

IStillMatter: And there's no Nobel prize for Stand-Up Comedy

$avingThePlanet: Hmm,... that's even more reason not to do it

IStillMatter: Back to the party problem

$avingThePlanet: Dean has lost control...

IStillMatter: Hillary is being even more divisive than usual...

$avingThePlanet: Now THAT's saying something

IStillMatter: True

$avingThePlanet: We need to neutralize the situation so the party can prepare to defeat McCain in November

IStillMatter: Any ideas?

$avingThePlanet: We need a peace plan

IStillMatter: What about a Camp David summit?

$avingThePlanet: Except that the current Camp David landlord is "W"

IStillMatter: Crap - right, that won't work

$avingThePlanet: We need a plan to bring them together

IStillMatter: Unfortunately both want to run for President

$avingThePlanet: One needs to agree to be VP

IStillMatter: What about sending them to Club Med

$avingThePlanet: What?!?

IStillMatter: It worked for Rep. Barney Frank and Sen. Larry Craig
IStillMatter: They were locked in heated a Senate vs. House debate over the farm bill
IStillMatter: But - after a weekend at Club Med, they seem to have worked things out

$avingThePlanet: I...... I don't think that works in this case

IStillMatter: Why not - have you seen Obamas wife?
IStillMatter: I tell ya, that there is anger on wheels
IStillMatter: She's the kind of woman you have to drop with the first punch

$avingThePlanet: WHAT?!?

IStillMatter: No, seriously - if you just wing her, you're screwed - it's gonna be a battle

$avingThePlanet: Senator, I really think we need to take a different approach

IStillMatter: You have any ideas?

$avingThePlanet: Maybe we could persuade the Florida delegates to follow the OVERALL delegate totals

IStillMatter: You mean ignore the primary vote?

$avingThePlanet: There wasn't a vote

IStillMatter: So get them to abamdon hillary?

$avingThePlanet: Precisely

IStillMatter: Are you sure you can get the Florida Democratic Party people to do what you want?

$avingThePlanet: I am quite confident

IStillMatter: How so?

$avingThePlanet: You could say they owe me one...

IStillMatter: oops, I forgot

$avingThePlanet: This is delicious, actually

IStillMatter: Revenge is a dish best served cold

$avingThePlanet: And thanks to global warming, no child will ever have to eat a cold meal

IStillMatter: ?

$avingThePlanet: Just a little joke, there

IStillMatter: Here again, Al - don't try to tell jokes

$avingThePlanet: Sorry

IStillMatter: If this works, you could take credit, write a book, go on a lecture tour, and win a Nobel PEACE prize

$avingThePlanet: I like the way you think!

IStillMatter: Keep me posted

$avingThePlanet: Will-do

IStillMatter: Gotta go. My yacht is being detailed and I have to pick it up by noon

$avingThePlanet: You should consider a sailboat

IStillMatter: Too preppy
IStillMatter: And chicks dig the yacht
IStillMatter: When the four 600-horsepower diesel engines fire up, it's an impressive sight

$avingThePlanet: You know, John - when this is over, we should really talk about your carbon footprint

IStillMatter: I'll think about it

$avingThePlanet: Have a nice weekend

IStillMatter: later....

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

March 5: Hillary and Dean Debate

2008-03-06T12:54:00.011-05:00

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

11:13 PM EST Wednesday March 5, 2008

It'sNotOver: Howard?

It'sMyParty: Hello Senator

It'sNotOver: We need to talk about my Michigan and Florida Delegates
It'sNotOver: We need your assurances

It'sMyParty: Assurances?
It'sMyParty: of WHAT?!?

It'sNotOver: You KNOW who is set to win this thing...

It'sMyParty: No, I most certainly do NOT

It'sNotOver: C'mon Howard, I won NY, CA, TX and Ohio

It'sMyParty: Actually, you only won 51.4% of the delegates on that list

It'sNotOver: A win is a win

It'sMyParty: No, actually it is not
It'sMyParty: The cumulative popular vote clearly favors Senator Obama
It'sMyParty: AND, the delegate math from here to Denver is NOT in your favor

It'sNotOver: Don't lecture me you figurehead!

It'sMyParty: Oh boy, here we go...
It'sMyParty: I am not going to listen to this crap

It'sNotOver: Obama doesn't have a chance against McCain in November

It'sMyParty: YOU DO?
It'sMyParty: Your negatives are horrifying
It'sMyParty: You need to win 90% of the 57% of voters that don't simply hate you

It'sNotOver: I only need to beat McCain

It'sMyParty: And Al Queda "only" needs a nap...

It'sNotOver: What does that mean?

It'sMyParty: You just don't get it
It'sMyParty: I will NOT modify rules to favor you based on your unbiased opinion that you and only you should be the nominee

It'sNotOver: From my perspective, it's not an unreasonable request

It'sMyParty: Unbelievable!
It'sMyParty: Nor is asking the press to ignore the intern under the desk!

It'sNotOver: Now I am getting upset

It'sMyParty: There's a newsflash...
It'sMyParty: When are you not angry about something?

It'sNotOver: You are pushing your luck
It'sNotOver: Maybe we should replay your "I Have a Scream" Speech

It'sMyParty: I don't understand that comment

It'sNotOver: America needs to know I am being oppressed by an ego-maniac running the Democratic party

It'sMyParty: That's an incredible statement!
It'sMyParty: So everyone is either in on one of your schemes or they are out to get you?

It'sNotOver: Now you are making sense

It'sMyParty: Are you psychotic?

It'sNotOver: I am entitled to this nomination

It'sMyParty: No you are not - the electorate, delegates and process will determine it

It'sNotOver: This is getting nowhere

It'sMyParty: Like your campaign?

It'sNotOver: We need to get together live and settle this

It'sMyParty: Settle this?

It'sNotOver: Are you available for dinner Saturday?

It'sMyParty: Uh, no...

It'sNotOver: You need to make Saturday work - I am campaigning 24X7 every weekday

It'sMyParty: I already have dinner plans

It'sNotOver: Break them

It'sMyParty: Can't do that

It'sNotOver: Who is dinner with?

It'sMyParty: Barack, Michelle, Charles Gibson, and Oprah
It'sMyParty: We get together every Friday

It'sNotOver: I just LOVE how ABC stays impartial

It'sMyParty: Oh, you have a problem with that?
It'sMyParty: Go back to threatening Super Delegates

It'sNotOver: I'll be back!

It'sMyParty: That's so trite...
It'sMyParty: So now you are running for Governor of Kahleeforneeya?

It'sNotOver: Screw you!

It'sMyParty: BYE

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

March 4: Cat Fight!

2008-03-04T14:03:00.025-05:00

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

2:11 PM EST Monday March 4, 2008

It'sNotOver: Oprah?

QueenOfAllMedia: Hello Senator
QueenOfAllMedia: Nice to hear from you

It'sNotOver: You are more cordial than I would have expected

QueenOfAllMedia: Some of us are decent people

It'sNotOver: What's that supposed to mean?

QueenOfAllMedia: Why are you so sensitive?

It'sNotOver: I am not sensitive

QueenOfAllMedia: Are too

It'sNotOver: Am not

QueenOfAllMedia: Are too and you are not very convincing
QueenOfAllMedia: I imagine it's a tough day waiting for Ohio and Texas to reject you

It'sNotOver: I will emerge victorious!

QueenOfAllMedia: Yeah, keep telling yourself that...

It'sNotOver: You betrayed our friendship

QueenOfAllMedia: WHO betrayed WHO?
QueenOfAllMedia: Your deceit and revisionist history has hit a new low

It'sNotOver: You have some nerve!

QueenOfAllMedia: What? Thinking for myself?

It'sNotOver: Betraying a trust!

QueenOfAllMedia: Here again, false accusations on parade!

It'sNotOver: You will regret this

QueenOfAllMedia: How?
QueenOfAllMedia: Unlike others, I CANNOT be bought
QueenOfAllMedia: Ahem,... I tend to do the brokering

It'sNotOver: What's that supposed to mean

QueenOfAllMedia: For starters,... let's see....
QueenOfAllMedia: Your campaign is a gold mine of tell-all books
QueenOfAllMedia: "Oprah's Top 10" will have to be expanded to "Top 20"

It'sNotOver: You wouldn't!

QueenOfAllMedia: Try me!

It'sNotOver: You will pay!

QueenOfAllMedia: Au contraire!
QueenOfAllMedia: Millions of readers will pay...
QueenOfAllMedia: They will pay for millions of tell-all books...
QueenOfAllMedia: Talking about the dark side of you and Mr. Zipper!

It'sNotOver: That won't ever happen!
It'sNotOver: We have friends who will stop you

QueenOfAllMedia: Not with my ratings they won't!

It'sNotOver: We have many loyal friends!

QueenOfAllMedia: Fewer today than yesterday, honey
QueenOfAllMedia: And fewer tomorrow than today
QueenOfAllMedia: the bandwagon is empty, babe!

It'sNotOver: You have no idea what we are capable of!

QueenOfAllMedia:What are you and your broken-ass campaign going to do?

It'sNotOver: You will find out soon enough

QueenOfAllMedia: Want to hear the punchline?

It'sNotOver: Pardon?

QueenOfAllMedia: The massive profits from all of those tell-all books...
QueenOfAllMedia: They will be routed into a special PAC...
QueenOfAllMedia: It's named "OR2012"

It'sNotOver: What the F*** is OR2012?

QueenOfAllMedia: "Obama Re-election 2012"
QueenOfAllMedia: Deal with it!

It'sNotOver: I am about to cry!

QueenOfAllMedia: Do you need Katie Couric's number?

It'sNotOver: NO I DON'T!

QueenOfAllMedia: Uhh,.. yes you do...
QueenOfAllMedia: She changed her number yesterday to avoid constant harranging from your campaign pimps

It'sNotOver: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

QueenOfAllMedia: Bwaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahah!

It'sNotOver: How can you laugh?

QueenOfAllMedia: Well, because the times,... they are-a-changin'!

It'sNotOver: We will strike back!

QueenOfAllMedia: HA - that's great!
QueenOfAllMedia: Good luck to you and the death star team!
QueenOfAllMedia: As for me,... I'm calling Prentice Hall and Random House
QueenOfAllMedia: There are authors to book and contracts to sign!

It'sNotOver: You just made the enemies list, sister!

QueenOfAllMedia: How Nixonian of you... and don't "sister"me, Senator
QueenOfAllMedia: Your list must weigh 25 pounds by now
QueenOfAllMedia: Probably the size of the NY white pages
QueenOfAllMedia: It will take you some time to get through it
QueenOfAllMedia: Then again,... pretty soon you are gonna have LOTS of free time!

It'sNotOver: I am done with you!

QueenOfAllMedia: As are MANY people with you...

QueenOfAllMedia: I'm outta here!

QueenOfAllMedia: Gotta get my hair done for the Obama Coronation!

It'sNotOver: Arrrrggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

March 3: Bush Congratulates Putin

2008-03-03T18:18:00.017-05:00

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

11:24 AM EST Monday March 3, 2008

Bush43: Hiya Vlad!

SupremeLeader: Hello Bush

Bush43: Congratulations on the election
Bush43: You're guy won

SupremeLeader: Yes, I knew he -
SupremeLeader: oops
SupremeLeader: I am GLAD he won

Bush43: What's his name - Medivac, Medicare?

SupremeLeader: Medvedev!
SupremeLeader: Dmitry Medvedev

Bush43: Whatever...
Bush43: Looks like he needs to buy a vowel

SupremeLeader: What?

Bush43: Missin' an 'i' in his first name - Dimitry

SupremeLeader: No he's not...
SupremeLeader: thank you for understanding our language

Bush43: Hey, no problem

SupremeLeader: Uhh,... not a compliment
SupremeLeader: I am a bit offended, actually

Bush43: Really?
Bush43: Here I go to the trouble to reach out?

SupremeLeader: Doesn't matter
SupremeLeader: Like many Americans, you are impolite
SupremeLeader: Maybe you should go back to getting David Bowie's wife drunk

Bush43: Excuse me?

SupremeLeader: Our intelligence reports say you are trying to get Iran bombed

Bush43: You dork!

SupremeLeader: Do not insult me!

Bush43: David Bowie's wife is not Iran!
Bush43: I believe it is Yemen

SupremeLeader: Seriously?

Bush43: Go Gooble it and see for yourself

SupremeLeader: You mean Gookul it?

Bush43: Maybe that's it

SupremeLeader: Sorry
SupremeLeader: All this time I thought you were trying to pickup a musician's wife

Bush43: Maybe my predidsessor would have done that

SupremeLeader: Oh, Clinton

Bush43: That's him

SupremeLeader: We saw he met Carly Simon on Kennedy's island

Bush43: That foots with the CIA report

SupremeLeader: Foots?

Bush43: We herd the same thing
Bush43: Anyway - I was honestly reachin' out to say congratulations

SupremeLeader: Thank you very much

Bush43: If there's anything I can do for you, let me know

SupremeLeader: Maybe one thing
SupremeLeader: Kind of personal

Bush43: What is it?

SupremeLeader: Russian condoms are of poor quality

Bush43: Like your cars?

SupremeLeader: Don't push it, George

Bush43: Sorry

SupremeLeader: Could you arrange to have American condoms shipped to Moscow?

Bush43: Well, the State Department can do just about anything

SupremeLeader: Great
SupremeLeader: I would order them online but I don't want to risk getting spam to my e-mail address

Bush43: I understand
Bush43: How many?

SupremeLeader: I need 7 dozen to last a month

Bush43: You are an active boy

SupremeLeader: It relieves stress and the election has been hell on my nerves

Bush43: Tell me about it

SupremeLeader: Well, it all started when my term was up...

Bush43: NO, NO, NO - that's just a figure of speech
Bush43: Don't tell me about the election

SupremeLeader: Back to the condoms

Bush43: So, 7 dozen to the Kremil in Moscow?

SupremeLeader: That's Kremlin - but don't ship them there
SupremeLeader: Please send them to my house outside Moscow

Bush43: What's the address?

SupremeLeader: Your CIA has it
SupremeLeader: The USS Roosevelt has ICBM missile 015486-B currently aimed at it

Bush43: Of course, of course...
Bush43: I forgot

SupremeLeader: Can they wrap the package in a plain brown paper?

Bush43: Not a problem

SupremeLeader: One thing...

Bush43: ?

SupremeLeader: I need a special size
SupremeLeader: 10 inches long by 6 inches wide

Bush43: Wow -
Bush43: But that's not a problem

SupremeLeader: Will the size require a custom order?

Bush43: Nah,
Bush43: In the USA we call that a "medium"

SupremeLeader: Really?

Bush43: Pretty much

SupremeLeader: Thanks for the help with a sensitive topic

Bush43: No problem
Bush43: I hope You and Dmitry have a nice time

SupremeLeader: WHAT?

Bush43: Just messin' with ya, Vlad
Bush43: Glad to help

SupremeLeader: Thanks

Bush43: Bye

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

Feb 29: Bush and Kerry Reminisce

2008-02-29T13:28:00.021-05:00

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

11:18 AM EST Friday February 29, 2008

Bush43: You there?

IStillMatter: Yes

Bush43: Happy Leap Year Day!

IStillMatter: I don't understand

Bush43: It's the February bonus day
Bush43: The one we put on the calendar every 4 years
Bush43: To allow an extra day for campaigning

IStillMatter: I thought it had to do with calibrating the Earth's orbital timing
IStillMatter: A complete solar orbit is actually 365.3 days

Bush43: You sound like Gore
Bush43: Ya' gonna write a movie - "An Inconveenyet Orbit"?

IStillMatter: yi, yi, yi, yiiiiiii
IStillMatter: Leap Year is an accepted scientific truth
IStillMatter: The calculus has no detractors

Bush43: Gee thanks, smarty pants
Bush43: You trying to win a Noble Prize?

IStillMatter: That sarcasm is really not necessary
IStillMatter: And it's "Nobel"

Bush43: Whatever...
Bush43: So whaddaya up to today?

IStillMatter: Sitting here stunned that I am trading IMs with you

Bush43: Remember where we were 4 years ago?

IStillMatter: I was preparing for Super Tuesday - it was March 2, 2004
IStillMatter: Edwards was reeling

Bush43: You kicked his butt - took CA, NY and won 10 out of 9

IStillMatter: 10 out of 9?

Bush43: Whatever - you should know, you were there

IStillMatter: Yes, I was...

Bush43: Why did you choose pretty boy as VP?

IStillMatter: You know how it works - regional presence

Bush43: Too bad he couldn't influenza his own state.

IStillMatter: Uh, yeah.... that was a horrifying surprise
IStillMatter: I was not ebullient

Bush43: You were not what?

IStillMatter: Ebullient
IStillMatter: It's a fairly common S.A.T. word

Bush43: Sounds like the little cubes that make soup

IStillMatter: That's bullion!

Bush43: I thought bullion was gold
Bush43: We keep it in Fort Knocks

IStillMatter: You mean Knox!

Bush43: Stop correctin' me

IStillMatter: This is painful...

Bush43: 4 years ago Rove was tellin' me we were gonna whup you

IStillMatter: I can't believe you are commander in chief

Bush43: I also lead the military

IStillMatter: Ugh...

Bush43: You got indigestion?

IStillMatter: No, I have a headache

Bush43: You need an asspurin

IStillMatter: No kidding?!?!

Bush43: The Surgeon General brings 'em to me
Bush43: He's a doctor, but not a general like in the military

IStillMatter: I KNOW who the Surgeon General is

Bush43: That headache is makin' you testy

IStillMatter: No SH*T

Bush43: You constipateteed too?

IStillMatter: I am going to kill myself...

Bush43: You still not over the election?
Bush43: Or did you wake up still married to Heinz?

IStillMatter: I have to go

Bush43: Sounds like the constipashun might be fixed

IStillMatter: Good bye

Bush43: Ahdeeoce!
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

Feb 28: Hillary Makes A Play

2008-02-28T17:26:00.021-05:00

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

7:28 AM EST Monday February 28, 2008

It'sNotOver: Hey cutie...

Delegates4U: beg your pardon?

It'sNotOver: Smile for mommy

Delegates4U: I am suddenly very, very uncomfortable

It'sNotOver: C'mon now, you play around...

Delegates4U: Where is this going?

It'sNotOver: How about some love for some delegates?

Delegates4U: Ughhh... I just had breakfast
Delegates4U: You are not my type, Senator

It'sNotOver: No, no, no, sweetie...
It'sNotOver: I would have a surrogate handle the program for me

Delegates4U: This is now weird
Delegates4U: How many friggin' surrogates are in your campaign?

It'sNotOver: A lot...
It'sNotOver: Outsourcing is common these days

Delegates4U: Not by married men

It'sNotOver: C'mon, Johnny, we all know you are not 100% married

Delegates4U: I getting uncomfortable again

It'sNotOver: The good news is...

Delegates4U: There is GOOD news?

It'sNotOver: YOU get to pick the surrogate!
It'sNotOver: Any of a number of Hollywood glam-girls!

Delegates4U: Hmm,... on second thought
Delegates4U: Let me think for a minute

It'sNotOver: Any favorites?

Delegates4U: How about Renee Witherspoon or Amber Tamblyn?

It'sNotOver: Wow - interesting choices
It'sNotOver: There's a 7 year gap between them...
It'sNotOver: Renee may need to get a sitter, too
It'sNotOver: Why not go young and book Amber?

Delegates4U: Very analytical..
Delegates4U: I agree - Amber it is!

It'sNotOver: Good choice...
It'sNotOver: Hang on, I'll txt here and check
It'sNotOver: brb

It'sNotOver: ...waiting for a reply...

It'sNotOver: Crap! She says that day is double-booked

Delegates4U: Tell her to cancel...
Delegates4U: Don't you have the juice?

It'sNotOver: YES I DO
It'sNotOver: txting again...

It'sNotOver: waiting...

It'sNotOver: Dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit, dammit!

Delegates4U: Calm down...
Delegates4U: What's up?

It'sNotOver: She's double booked with BILL!

Delegates4U: Oh boy...

It'sNotOver: I AM GOING TO KILL HIM!

Delegates4U: Well, Senator... ahem....
Delegates4U: YOU sent him out to the tier-2 markets to keep him away from National media...

It'sNotOver: I AM AWARE OF THAT!

Delegates4U: He was left unattended and must have got bored

It'sNotOver: THANK-YOU-DR.-PHIL!

Delegates4U: I'm having second thoughts here

It'sNotOver: Wait, wait wait...
It'sNotOver: I can set this up with someone else
It'sNotOver: Christie Brinkley is a reliable firewall!

Delegates4U: You like to invoke firewalls when you are losing, don't you?

It'sNotOver: I am suddenly not liking your tone

Delegates4U: Fine. Whatever...
Delegates4U: The answer is no.

It'sNotOver: Wait, wait, wait
It'sNotOver: Don't close the window!

Delegates4U: Goodbye, Senator

Delegates4U: *click*

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

Feb 27: Obama and McCain are Giddy

2008-02-27T12:34:00.009-05:00

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

5:21 AM EST Wednesday February 27, 2008

POWSenator: Hey Champ!

BigMo4DC: Good Morning, Senator
BigMo4DC: Let's not get carried away

POWSenator: A tie goes to the front-runner!

BigMo4DC: Again, there's a long way to go

POWSenator: Not for me!

BigMo4DC: I get that - but I still have work to do

POWSenator: Not for long you don't

BigMo4DC: DUDE!
BigMo4DC: This is like trying to study when a fraternity brother wants to party!

POWSenator: Beer run?

BigMo4DC: Texas and Ohio are in a week and I have to keep putting pressure on her

POWSenator: Not to take credit from you, but...
POWSenator: She's doing a bang-up job of losing - and it's ugly!
POWSenator: Who could have predicted such an implosion?

BigMo4DC: I like to think MY TEAM had something to do with it

POWSenator: That's the fighting spirit I know and love!

BigMo4DC: I have not stopped fighting - it's keeping me busy
BigMo4DC: Don't YOU have something to do?

POWSenator: Except for watching the NY Times crucify its own staff,... no.

BigMo4DC: You handled it well.

POWSenator: Yeah,... kinda boring just sitting around waiting for the convention
POWSenator: Hey - wanna go to a baseball game?

BigMo4DC: You're serious?

POWSenator: Cubs - D-Backs, baby!
POWSenator: They play at Wrigley May 9-10-11

BigMo4DC: That would be fun, actually

POWSenator: I'll check www.stubhub.com and try to get 37 seats together

BigMo4DC: 37?

POWSenator: Wives, Children, Secret Service... it adds up
POWSenator: Barack, we are about to experience a whole new level of complexity
POWSenator: This summer, we can't burp without making headlines

BigMo4DC: Not looking forward to that part

POWSenator: A baseball game with the families would show we are regular guys and friendly competitors

BigMo4DC: If I catch a foul ball, I could give it to a disabled person

POWSenator: See - you DO like the idea!

BigMo4DC: Sports pages everywhere would have a photo of me giving you the ball

POWSenator: Huh?
POWSenator: Oh, I GET IT... very funny...
POWSenator: Don't be "a clinton"

BigMo4DC: now THAT's very funny
BigMo4DC: Really, I gotta go

POWSenator: So, you'll think about it?

BigMo4DC: Sure

POWSenator: Keep up the good work
POWSenator: But only until your convention
POWSenator: ;)

BigMo4DC: Take Care, Senator

POWSenator: You too

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

Feb 26: Kerry Encourages Obama

2008-02-27T12:26:00.007-05:00

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

8:52 AM EST Tuesday February 26, 2008

IStillMatter: Barack?

BigMo4DC: Hello, Senator

IStillMatter: Good luck tonight in Cleveland

BigMo4DC: Thank You

IStillMatter: I mean that

BigMo4DC: I believe you

IStillMatter: This is entertaining

BigMo4DC: Sorry?

IStillMatter: They screwed me, so to speak

BigMo4DC: I understand

IStillMatter: They wanted me to lose!
IStillMatter: Now their plan has back-fired

BigMo4DC: The scenario is widely circulated and understood

IStillMatter: I will enjoy watching that carpet bagger and her zipper-challenged husband go down in flames!
IStillMatter: I will be rooting for you tonight

BigMo4DC: Again, thank you Senator

IStillMatter: Destroy her!

BigMo4DC: You sure seem intense

IStillMatter: Intense?
IStillMatter: You should see Gore!

BigMo4DC: Well, Gore is doing good work in the investment community
BigMo4DC: and...time heals all wounds

IStillMatter: Time heals?
IStillMatter: Maybe in 2075 when the Earth is 200 degrees...
IStillMatter: Until then, I would say he's still pissed

BigMo4DC: I need to prepare and it looks like you could use a drink

IStillMatter: Maybe I do need one

BigMo4DC: Thank you for the encouragement

IStillMatter: One last thing...

BigMo4DC: O.K.

IStillMatter: A little secret weapon for you

BigMo4DC: What is it?

IStillMatter: I found out something about Hillary
IStillMatter: Interested?

BigMo4DC: Well, we KNOW her surrogates circulated the pictures of me in Arab garb this morning...

IStillMatter: No, this is better

BigMo4DC: What is it

IStillMatter: Hillary is Lebanese!

BigMo4DC: WTF?!?

IStillMatter: I was similarly surprised!

BigMo4DC: No, no, no - that's not it
BigMo4DC: I think you mean something MUCH MUCH different

IStillMatter: But I got this from a reliable source

BigMo4DC: Where?

IStillMatter: An associate had breakfast with Karl Rove
IStillMatter: Rove accidentally left a paper marked "intelligence" report on the table when he left

BigMo4DC: Accidentally?...
BigMo4DC: When does Rove "accidentally" do anything?

IStillMatter: You think I am being used?

BigMo4DC: What do YOU think?

IStillMatter: I think America should know if the next President is Lebanese!

BigMo4DC: I think you should have a nice stiff drink

IStillMatter: Good luck

BigMo4DC: Thanks

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

Feb 25: Hill Checks-On Bill

2008-02-27T12:10:00.008-05:00

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

5:14 AM EST Monday February 25, 2008

It'sNotOver: Bill?

LoveBubba: Oh, Hi - NICE TO HEAR FROM YOU

It'sNotOver: Still upset about being sent to the field?

LoveBubba: YES I am...

It'sNotOver: You were pissing off the National Media and Voters
It'sNotOver: It was impacting the campaign

LoveBubba: Well, you're doing a helluva job without me

It'sNotOver: Stuff the sarcasm
It'sNotOver: We have talked about this!

LoveBubba: I feel like Willard effing Scott
LoveBubba: Barnstorming %&#*%! county fairs
LoveBubba: I gave a speech from the back of a pickup truck!

It'sNotOver: Really?

LoveBubba: Yes, really - here's the picture

It'sNotOver: Hmm, I see your point

LoveBubba: Gee, thanks...

It'sNotOver: Where were you?

LoveBubba: Armpit, Texas

It'sNotOver: Be nice

LoveBubba: Seriously, Hilla - I'm bouncing around tier-2 markets and speaking to half-full gymnasiums at doggone high schools

It'sNotOver: That's what we sent you to do

LoveBubba: I'll miss your Cleveland debate because the motel - yes a MOTEL - doesn't have cable!

It'sNotOver: Oh well,...

LoveBubba: Let me come back home

It'sNotOver: Nope. Too risky

LoveBubba: I can't believe I am doing this
LoveBubba: I haven't seen a mainstream reporter in 2 weeks

It'sNotOver: Exactly
It'sNotOver: Bye -

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

Feb 23: Cheney Starts Trouble

2008-02-27T11:58:00.010-05:00

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9:11 AM EST Saturday February 23, 2008

SupremeLeader: Mr. Vice President Cheney?

BehindTheCurtain: Hello Prime Minister
BehindTheCurtain: Good to hear from you

SupremeLeader: How is life at your "undisclosed location?"
SupremeLeader: I hear Tahiti is nice at this time of year

BehindTheCurtain: How did you know where I am?

SupremeLeader: We both know more than we discuss

BehindTheCurtain: True,.. true...

SupremeLeader: So how is work?

BehindTheCurtain: Well, Bush is on vacation in Texas so I am on duty

SupremeLeader: What does that mean?

BehindTheCurtain: Well, essentially I am doing the work of one-and-a-half men

SupremeLeader: Ha, ha - American joke

BehindTheCurtain: So what's on your mind?

SupremeLeader: I got a call from Obama
SupremeLeader: He wants to just chat and get to know me

BehindTheCurtain: He is trying to show the US media he is up-to-speed internationally

SupremeLeader: I see
SupremeLeader: So, should I take the meeting with him?

BehindTheCurtain: I don't see why not
BehindTheCurtain: Now, please understand that Obama is an interesting character
BehindTheCurtain: Communicating with him often requires drama

SupremeLeader: How can I demonstrate this "drama"?

BehindTheCurtain: It's not difficult - but I am sure you will figure it out

SupremeLeader: Can you please tell me?

BehindTheCurtain: I'm pressed for time - and you are a smart man.

SupremeLeader: Even a smart man appreciates assistance...

BehindTheCurtain: Well, we could make a deal

SupremeLeader: What type of deal?

BehindTheCurtain: I tell you how to work with Obama and...
BehindTheCurtain: You give Halliburton the contract on a couple power plants

SupremeLeader: That is easy - consider it done!

BehindTheCurtain: Wonderful!
BehindTheCurtain: So, with Obama you must demonstrate power AND respect

SupremeLeader: I see

BehindTheCurtain: But demonstrating YOUR authority is most important

SupremeLeader: Of course

BehindTheCurtain: HOW you do that is important
BehindTheCurtain: You MUST do it in a way Obama understands

SupremeLeader: I follow you

BehindTheCurtain: There is a simple term used in his state

SupremeLeader: Chicago?

BehindTheCurtain: Close - actually it's Illinois

SupremeLeader: Sorry for the error
SupremeLeader: Our spy satellite photos don't have names of places or boundary lines on them
SupremeLeader: It's a real pisser.

BehindTheCurtain: I can understand that

SupremeLeader: Rand McNally does such a good job.
SupremeLeader: I interrupt KGB presentations to ask "What the hell are we looking at?"
SupremeLeader: Buildings, trees, streets, - the damn pictures could be anyplace!
SupremeLeader: We need names of streets, cities and locations of highway rest-stops

BehindTheCurtain: That's clearly a frustrating situation

SupremeLeader: You have no idea
SupremeLeader: I cleverly stole a Hertz map on a trip to Disneyworld with my family
SupremeLeader: I told the KGB intelligence chief - "JUST MAKE IT LOOK LIKE THIS."

BehindTheCurtain: You are quite wise and commanding
BehindTheCurtain: I fully appreciate your leadership style

SupremeLeader: Thank you very much!

BehindTheCurtain: Our CIA had the same problem
BehindTheCurtain: We have essentially shut down our spy satellite fleet

SupremeLeader: What?

BehindTheCurtain: Google maps is much better for this purpose
BehindTheCurtain: We have outsourced the entire surveillance program to them

SupremeLeader: Very interesting...
SupremeLeader: We will look into that immediately
SupremeLeader: Thanks for the tip

BehindTheCurtain: The secret website is: www.realtor.com
BehindTheCurtain: Ender the address and click "aerial view"

SupremeLeader: This will save me billions!

BehindTheCurtain: Glad to help a friend

SupremeLeader: So, back to Obama...

BehindTheCurtain: Right - There is a phase used in Illinois
BehindTheCurtain: Invoking it at the right moment should do the trick

SupremeLeader: What is this phrase?

BehindTheCurtain: "Duuuusshe Bahhhg!"

SupremeLeader: How is it used in a sentence?

BehindTheCurtain: All by itself - with appropriate tone of voice
BehindTheCurtain: HOW you act when you say it is important

SupremeLeader: What is the protocol?

BehindTheCurtain: When a key question comes up, just do the following

SupremeLeader: I am taking notes...

BehindTheCurtain: First, rub your eyes and exhale deeply
BehindTheCurtain: Then stand up
BehindTheCurtain: Point at Obama with a stern look on your face
BehindTheCurtain: Loudly say "Duuuusshe Bahhhg!" and slam you hand on the table
BehindTheCurtain: Then wait for his reaction

SupremeLeader: Just like that?

BehindTheCurtain: Yep

SupremeLeader: Thank you for the gracious help!
SupremeLeader: We will be faxing the contracts to Halliburton immediately

BehindTheCurtain: Anytime

SupremeLeader: Bye for now

BehindTheCurtain: Bye

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Feb 22: Obama and Cheney Confer

2008-02-27T11:46:00.009-05:00

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2:18 PM EST Friday February 22, 2008

BigMo4DC: Mr. Vice President?

BehindTheCurtain: Hello Senator

BigMo4DC: I have a serious question

BehindTheCurtain: What about?

BigMo4DC: Foreign policy

BehindTheCurtain: Go for it

BigMo4DC: I want to meet with a foreign leader but it needs to be a significant country

BehindTheCurtain: What for?

BigMo4DC: Photo-Op

BehindTheCurtain: Try Italy or France

BigMo4DC: No, this needs to be a more significant country

BehindTheCurtain: How about Venezuela?
BehindTheCurtain: In fact, Bush Sr. and I could setup a multi-country tour.

BigMo4DC: Venezuela and what else?

BehindTheCurtain: We send you to Venezuela to demand Chavez stop screwing with Chevron and Exxon
BehindTheCurtain: Then you go to Columbia and tell them to control the cartels "or else"

BigMo4DC: I go personally to Venezuela and Columbia?

BehindTheCurtain: Well Chavez doesn't take you seriously unless you make the trip
BehindTheCurtain: and the Columbians tend to respond best in-person.

BigMo4DC: What about security?

BehindTheCurtain: You are practically a Presidential Candidate - what's the worst that could happen?

BigMo4DC: Uhh,... kidnapping... assassination

BehindTheCurtain: I wouldn't worry about assassination - you'd be much more valuable alive

BigMo4DC: But still, I don't want to be kidnapped

BehindTheCurtain: Com'on if, if, if that ever happened...
BehindTheCurtain: President McCain would eventually get you back
BehindTheCurtain: It would be a top priority after the inauguration
BehindTheCurtain: ...maybe second to tax-cuts, but certainly high on the list

BigMo4DC: Uh,... Let's ditch the Latin American idea
BigMo4DC: What about Russia?

BehindTheCurtain: Hmm,... Putin is a tough guy

BigMo4DC: We could meet somewhere in Europe
BigMo4DC: Just a photo op

BehindTheCurtain: Maybe you get luck and a foreign leader dies

BigMo4DC: But you never know when that will happen

BehindTheCurtain: I can call the CIA and check the assassination calendar
BehindTheCurtain: Maybe something is coming up

BigMo4DC: WHAT?!?!

BehindTheCurtain: Just leave it to me
BehindTheCurtain: I'll see what I can do

BigMo4DC: Uh,... thanks, I think

BehindTheCurtain: Anytime, Senator

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Feb 21: John Gets Advice From Rudy

2008-02-27T11:34:00.016-05:00

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10:19 AM EST Thursday February 21, 2008

Delegates4U: Rudy?

America'sMayor: Hi John, how are you?

Delegates4U: O.K. I guess

America'sMayor: You sound glum
America'sMayor: Is something on your mind?

Delegates4U: yeah

America'sMayor: Wanna talk about it?

Delegates4U: I need some advice

America'sMayor: Glad to help

Delegates4U: I bailed out just like you did
Delegates4U: No sense blowing money

America'sMayor: Absolutely

Delegates4U: You have gone back to being the 9-11 hero, security expert, public speaker, etc

America'sMayor: Don't forget foreign emissary at $100,000 a day

Delegates4U: Of course, of course, my oversight

America'sMayor: Go on...

Delegates4U: I really want to be US Attorney General...
Delegates4U: But my influence with Obama is out the window because his lead is far greater than the delegates I control

America'sMayor: You're the Monopoly player that stayed too long...
America'sMayor: You should have traded your properties long ago
America'sMayor: The game is almost over and your properties have no leverage

Delegates4U: Exactly!
Delegates4U: So, what would you do if you were me?

America'sMayor: Wrong question to ask

Delegates4U: Why?

America'sMayor: I would never have been in this situation
America'sMayor: My butt would be long gone by now
America'sMayor: I'm far too intelligent to be in your situation

Delegates4U: WOW, you hit hard

America'sMayor: I'm from NY!
America'sMayor: Just being blunt

Delegates4U: What do you suggest I do now?

America'sMayor: Call my office at Giuliani Partners
America'sMayor: We handle Disaster and Emergency planning for all kinds of clients

Delegates4U: I was hoping we could just chat

America'sMayor: There's no free lunch
America'sMayor: And according to Federal Election Filings you have $4.1 million left in your campaign coffers

Delegates4U: True - what are you getting at?

America'sMayor: That's just covers my normal fee for your situation

Delegates4U: Fee?

America'sMayor: I charge $4M to assist "ex-Presidential candidates in need of strategic career refinement."

Delegates4U: This all seems coincidentally opportunistic...

America'sMayor: When disasters happen, I respond!

Delegates4U: I'm taken aback, Rudy...

America'sMayor: Do you want to meet or not?

Delegates4U: I DO NEED advice

America'sMayor: Who better than me?

Delegates4U: Can't argue with that

America'sMayor: Call my office in NY

Delegates4U: O.K. - talk to you later

America'sMayor: Bye -

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Feb 20: Bill "Congratulates" Obama

2008-02-20T11:54:00.007-05:00

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8:19 PM EST Wednesday February 20, 2008

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Senator?

BigMo4DC: Well, well, well, the pitbull speaks

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Yeah, uhh, well - nothing personal
Don'tShootTheMessenger: Just politics

BigMo4DC: That's your typical excuse
BigMo4DC: It's someone else's fault
BigMo4DC: Bill and Hill are just victims...

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Hey man, I didn't come here to argue
Don'tShootTheMessenger: Congratulations on the win in Wisconsin

BigMo4DC: Thanks
BigMo4DC: What's the catch?

Don'tShootTheMessenger: No catch

BigMo4DC: BULL

Don'tShootTheMessenger: You don't trust me at all, do you

BigMo4DC: That's a surprise?

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Let's set aside this election stuff
Don'tShootTheMessenger: I need a favor

BigMo4DC: FOR YOU?!?!?!?

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Easy does it, the Republicans are the enemy.
Don'tShootTheMessenger: We are brothers!

BigMo4DC: D O N O T G O T H E R E

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Hey, hey - not tryin' to get a rise out of you.

BigMo4DC: Getting rises is typically YOUR problem

Don'tShootTheMessenger: touche'

BigMo4DC: There's MUST be a reason you reached out today

Don'tShootTheMessenger: I'm trying to get to it

BigMo4DC: Then get to it
BigMo4DC: You have 1 minute
BigMo4DC: I am late for Good Morning America

Don'tShootTheMessenger: In the unlikely event you win the nomination and the general election, I may really need a favor

BigMo4DC: Such as?

Don'tShootTheMessenger: A pardon

BigMo4DC: For what?

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Any and all actions while at a former job

BigMo4DC: When was this?

Don'tShootTheMessenger: January 1993 to January 2001

BigMo4DC: HA!

Don'tShootTheMessenger: No, really
Don'tShootTheMessenger: It was a tough job and I had to make "choices" every day

BigMo4DC: This is borderline insanity
BigMo4DC: I must refer you to David Geffen
BigMo4DC: There may be a new cabinet post - Secretary of Pardons
BigMo4DC: He's my man for the job

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Uh,... Not sure that works for me

BigMo4DC: Gee,... why?

Don'tShootTheMessenger: C'mon, you know

BigMo4DC: I'm soooo not concerned...

Don'tShootTheMessenger: You are becoming arrogant...
Don'tShootTheMessenger: uncooperative, self-centered, self-important...
Don'tShootTheMessenger: Self-loyal rather than loyal to the party
Don'tShootTheMessenger: and totally unconcerned about those who helped you get to where you are today.

BigMo4DC: WHOA!
BigMo4DC: That's not at all familiar to you?

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Should it be?

BigMo4DC: Look in the mirror, Bubba

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Ouch

BigMo4DC: Yo - pardon THIS!

Don'tShootTheMessenger: Not nice...

BigMo4DC: Later -

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Feb 19: Colmes Seeks Out Teddy

2008-02-19T11:18:00.008-05:00

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9:06 AM EST Tuesday February 19, 2008

ColmesFOX: Senator?

MassPatriarch: Hello Alan

ColmesFOX: Thanks for making time

MassPatriarch: Nice to be here
MassPatriarch: A big hello to your audience

ColmesFOX: Uh,.. Senator - this is IM

ColmesFOX: We're not on the air

MassPatriarch: My mistake

ColmesFOX: No problem

ColmesFOX: What's your reaction to Obama plagiarism issue?

MassPatriarch: Not sure there is an issue at all

ColmesFOX: Sure there is
ColmesFOX: The dynamic, amazing, "ready-on-day-one" Senator Clinton brought it up
ColmesFOX: The inexperienced, shallow, unqualified Senator Obama appears to have made a serious gaffe

MassPatriarch: I'm taken aback by your intriguing use of adjectives

ColmesFOX: Perhaps I was intoxicated with enthusiasm
ColmesFOX: Sorry, I veered off the road a bit

MassPatriarch: I know you lean toward Clinton

ColmesFOX: I didn't mean to drown you in descriptives

ColmesFOX: You were a helpless passenger as I want on a bit of a rant

MassPatriarch: Uh,...

ColmesFOX: Senator?

MassPatriarch: Still here

ColmesFOX: Uh,... o.k. ... getting back to the question

MassPatriarch: Look, there's no story here

ColmesFOX: Obama quoted Massachusetts Governor Deval Patrick

MassPatriarch: And?

ColmesFOX: Sir, he did so without attribution

MassPatriarch: Yeah, so?

ColmesFOX: You don't see anything wrong with that?

MassPatriarch: Explain why I would

ColmesFOX: I was hoping you give me that answer

MassPatriarch: C'mon - Barack was quoting a fellow Democrat
MassPatriarch: A fellow African-American
MassPatriarch: Brothers in the quest to integrate American Politics
MassPatriarch: and, AHEM, Deval had NO PROBLEM with it

ColmesFOX: I guess I see the point
ColmesFOX: The Clinton people got me revved up

MassPatriarch: I think you mean hypnotized

ColmesFOX: perhaps...

MassPatriarch: Say, on another topic, I could use a favor
MassPatriarch: Can you get me Coulter's cell number?

ColmesFOX: What for?

MassPatriarch: She's hot

ColmesFOX: Do I understand this...
ColmesFOX: You want to ask her out?

MassPatriarch: It's worth a shot...

ColmesFOX: I'm really uncomfortable here

MassPatriarch: Don't be
MassPatriarch: It's simple, really...
MassPatriarch: I wouldn't pass up an opportunity to screw a Republican

ColmesFOX: I have to ignore that comment

MassPatriarch: Oh Alan, you are wound too tight
MassPatriarch: You should take a vacation and mellow out

ColmesFOX: You may have a point

MassPatriarch: Have a drink

ColmesFOX: I think I need one

MassPatriarch: Call if you need anything else

ColmesFOX: Thank you, Senator

MassPatriarch: The cell number?

ColmesFOX: I'll work on it

MassPatriarch: You know where to find me

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Feb 18: McCain and Huck Confer

2008-02-18T12:07:00.007-05:00

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10:32 PM EST Monday February 18, 2008

POWSenator: Governor?

WWHD: Yes, Senator

POWSenator: Can you believe Hillary these days?

WWHD: Striking back like a cornered animal

POWSenator: Totally

WWHD: The back-room arm-twisting is a disgrace

POWSenator: It's all about "Who can beat McCain"
POWSenator: She's going to screw the electorate to grab power

WWHD: Sad, really

POWSenator: More like pathetic

WWHD: Not fun to watch

POWSenator: Actually, I disagree
POWSenator: This is INCERDIBLY fun to watch
POWSenator: There's nothing else on TV
POWSenator: The writers's strike screwed up prime time

WWHD: You have TIME for regular TV?

POWSenator: It keeps me sane

WWHD: I had no idea...

POWSenator: The new American Idol season looks promising
POWSenator: Simon has been nearly human
POWSenator: And,... Paula has "wandered off the reservation" only once

WWHD: Hmm,... I don't watch it

POWSenator: It's a compelling look at one part of the electorate

WWHD: Uh,.. which part?

POWSenator: The "I am a freak and will wait in line for 8 hours for one measly shot to be one of 24 people who MAYBE have a chance at making one CD."
POWSenator: The one problem is that this very narrow segment doesn't vote

WWHD: How do you know?

POWSenator: Watch the show and you will understand...

WWHD: I'll take your word for it

POWSenator: I'm betting on this blonde chick from the sticks
POWSenator: Brooke White from Mesa Arizona - sings like a choir girl
POWSenator: Gotta support AZ!
POWSenator: You would love her

WWHD: 'skuse me?

POWSenator: Sorry - church joke.

WWHD: No worries

POWSenator: So, let'e get back to the GOP primaries

WWHD: I'm still in
WWHD: Don't want to argue about it, either...

POWSenator: You are nothing if not tenacious
POWSenator: This is like watching a Rocky movie in reverse

WWHD: Which one?

POWSenator: Doesn't matter...
POWSenator: You get your butt kicked and walk out of the ring at the end

WWHD: I thought Rocky always...
WWHD: On second though - nevermind
WWHD: I am staying in for now

POWSenator: Not surprising but not a problem
POWSenator: I have all the delegates I need

WWHD: I respect you - just respect me, o.k.?

POWSenator: Whatever
POWSenator: Hey, I gotta go - Hannity and Colmes are on
POWSenator: Colmes loves Hillary and Hannity Hates me
POWSenator: It's like watching a bizzaro world Celebrity Apprentice

WWHD: How often do you watch them?

POWSenator: Religiously - ha, ha!

WWHD: Funny

POWSenator: I really gotta go - don't want to miss anything

WWHD: At least it's important...

POWSenator: Thanks for understanding

WWHD: No sweat...

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Feb 17: Hillary Blows a Gasket

2008-02-17T23:11:00.006-05:00

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8:19 PM EST Sunday February 17, 2008

BigMo4DC: Hey

SuperDelegatesAreMine: Don't 'hey' me...
SuperDelegatesAreMine: It's Senator!

BigMo4DC: HA! You don't deserve that title

SuperDelegatesAreMine: That's insulting and disrespectful

BigMo4DC: How can YOU possibly talk about respect?
BigMo4DC: Especially as you try to steal the nomination!

SuperDelegatesAreMine: Steal?
SuperDelegatesAreMine: Look rookie, rules are rules

BigMo4DC: Rules? YOU are breaking rules left and right
BigMo4DC: You are discounting the voice of the people

SuperDelegatesAreMine: VOTERS? THE PEOPLE?
SuperDelegatesAreMine: THE PEOPLE HAVE NO IDEA
SuperDelegatesAreMine: THE PEOPLE ARE MINDLESS AND BRAINLESS
SuperDelegatesAreMine: THEY ARE A FLOCK THAT MUST BE BE LED

BigMo4DC: Calm down
BigMo4DC: You are gong to have a stroke
BigMo4DC: On second thought, in honor of the Daytona 500...
BigMo4DC: Go ahead and blow a gasket

SuperDelegatesAreMine: Who are the "Daytona 500?"
SuperDelegatesAreMine: Are they a repressed minority or something?

BigMo4DC: That comment is simply incredible
BigMo4DC: I am speechless

SuperDelegatesAreMine: THERE'S A CHANGE!

BigMo4DC: Don't be pathetic

SuperDelegatesAreMine: You have some nerve

BigMo4DC: Yeah, right
BigMo4DC: I'll tell you what else I have...
BigMo4DC: I have the delegate lead
BigMo4DC: I did it running against TWO candidates

SuperDelegatesAreMine: You call EDWARDS a candidate?

BigMo4DC: Actually, I was referring to the Erection-In-Chief

SuperDelegatesAreMine: You will NOT speak to me that way

BigMo4DC: YOU WILL NOT manipulate the system
BigMo4DC: YOU WILL NOT frustrate the will of the people

SuperDelegatesAreMine: Don't be ridiculous, it's done...

BigMo4DC: Ridiculous?
BigMo4DC: Sending your campaign manager to tell the Sunday talk shows that this is over is ridiculous

SuperDelegatesAreMine: Your underdog days are over!

BigMo4DC: Oh, so you are saying there's no Eli Manning in this campaign?

SuperDelegatesAreMine: Who the hell is Eli Manning?
SuperDelegatesAreMine: Is he a Super Delegate?

BigMo4DC: Oh, that's perfect...
BigMo4DC: You are brazen AND clueless

SuperDelegatesAreMine: Die!

BigMo4DC: I am going to enjoy watching you wilt

SuperDelegatesAreMine: See you in Wisconsin!

BigMo4DC: Really? You don't even campaign there...

SuperDelegatesAreMine: I meant OHIO!

BigMo4DC: One loss at a time, Senator

SuperDelegatesAreMine: You still don't get it

BigMo4DC: No. YOU don't get it
BigMo4DC: The world is watching
BigMo4DC: This won't be stolen

SuperDelegatesAreMine: We'll see about that

BigMo4DC: Yes,... yes WE will

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Feb 15: Obama Calls John

2008-02-15T12:05:00.006-05:00

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10:47 AM EST Friday February 15, 2008

BigMo4DC: You there?

Delegates4U: Yeah,... Hang on
Delegates4U: Talking to MSNBC

BigMo4DC: k-

Delegates4U: Thanks for waiting

BigMo4DC: You see the Texas Polls this morning?

Delegates4U: No, not yet

BigMo4DC: American Politics says I lead +5%

Delegates4U: That rocks! You Stud!

BigMo4DC: My delegate lead over her will soon be more than the delegates you have

Delegates4U: I noticed that yesterday

BigMo4DC: You could pledge support and end this thing

BigMo4DC: Or wait and not be needed
BigMo4DC: Or bet on the wrong horse

Delegates4U: You sure get right to the point

BigMo4DC: So, where are you at, Senator?

Delegates4U: Uhh,.. not a Senator anymore

BigMo4DC: Sorry, forgot
BigMo4DC: So you're between jobs?

Delegates4U: Knock it off

BigMo4DC: I'm just saying...

Delegates4U: I know the situation
Delegates4U: I want to be AG
Delegates4U: But my leverage is shrinking

BigMo4DC: I am going to play this straight

Delegates4U: I know you are...
Delegates4U: But THEY are calling in chips, though
Delegates4U: Bubba called me a day ago

BigMo4DC: I am sooooooooo surprised
BigMo4DC: He must have been out of Viagra
BigMo4DC: Or took a break from chasing campaign aides

Delegates4U: They have put AG on the table

BigMo4DC: Ever stop to count the things "THEY" have put on the table for people and interest groups?

BigMo4DC: Ever stop to wonder why so many of them end up dejected?
BigMo4DC: It's no surprise that so many people have supported me
BigMo4DC: Every day someone new steps away from them
BigMo4DC: They are not loved
BigMo4DC: They are feared

Delegates4U: Is AG on the table?

BigMo4DC: No promises, John

Delegates4U: Am I on the list?

BigMo4DC: Yes, absolutely

Delegates4U: What's the next step?

BigMo4DC: You and Gore need to do what you think is right
BigMo4DC: I will not ask you for anything...
BigMo4DC: Except that you follow your heart and conscience

Delegates4U: That's a change from the norm

BigMo4DC: My campaign is all about change

Delegates4U: I sorta noticed

BigMo4DC: It's in your court

Delegates4U: Message received

BigMo4DC: Later-

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